DISCLAIMER
I do not own any of the Pretender characters. But I felt free to write a fanfic about them.
First of all, I must say the idea for this fanfiction came to me during a dream. I'm re-watching The Pretender these days, and I ofter dream about tv shows, maybe because of my huge imagination. When I got up, I felt I had to put it down. This is going to be a long journey, chapter after chapter.
I wish to thank my dear and kind "Miss Parker" (Antoinette) who helped me to translate in English: I could not have done this without her!
I'm from Italy, so I hope you are forgiving my lacks in your language. Feel free to review and rate, even if you think this is terrible!
Chapter 1: The Future Together
NEW HAVEN HOTEL – NEW HAVEN, CONNECTICUT
9.30 p.m.
Jarod had never seen the hotel before, but as soon as he got in he understood he had chosen the perfect place for such an important meeting. The atmosphere was quiet and all the employees seemed disinterested with what was happening around them.
The hotel lobby somehow reminded him of The Centre, so just for a moment he felt almost trapped.
In the evenings they didn't usually have check-ins, it was an hotel accommodating mostly business travellers and conferences. That very night there was a dentists' meeting, which was taking place in the main hall, on the other side of the lobby.
Jarod breathed deeply and tried to summon his courage, then adjusted his traveling suitcase shoulder strap and headed to the reception desk.
A not more than twenty-something year old boy welcomed him with a warm smile.
"Welcome to New Haven Hotel, how may I help you, sir?"
Jarod didn't know how to answer: he had made the meeting, but now he was there he didn't know how to behave, maybe for the very first time in his life. Had his guest already arrived? Was she already there?
"Well, actually I was waiting for…"
"Oh, I got it! You must be Mr. Jarod!" the receptionist stopped him, and Jarod spied his badge noticing his name was Christopher.
"How did you know?" he asked, a bit worried. He was usually the one surprising others when they arrived at a place he just left and were recognized because he had talked about them
"Your wife is waiting in your suite. Room 327. She also told me to give you this – the boy continued and gave him the room key – She said she didn't want to take the risk that you forgot your room number"
Christopher smiled again while Jarod took his key: "My w-wife?" he asked, curious.
"Yes sir, and if I'm allowed, that is a woman who knows her stuff, it mustn't be easy to keep your eye on her."
Then Jarod smiled for the first time.
"Actually it's more difficult for her to keep an eye on me, believe me. Thank you, Christopher." he concluded and gave the boy a tip.
The elevator took him to the third floor, where he started looking for room 327. He walks slowly, even if his grave and constant gait hid an interior agony, because he was looking forward to reaching her.
Was she really waiting for him in that room?
When he arrived in front of the door with the number 327 impressed, Jarod tightened his suitcase shoulder strap once again. His leather jacket covered a blue shirt and a dark jeans, his clothing, as usual, was impeccable. He opened the door in one fell swoop and in a moment he was inside the room. He locked the door and lay the suitcase down next to the entrance. He looked around, but there was no trace of her.
He made a few steps inside and let his eyes travel around the room. On the right side there was a double bed, on the left a long leather couch, a glass table with a vase on it and a modern style lamp.
In front of him, there was a huge window overlooking a wonderful New Haven view.
So the bathroom had to be at his back, behind the door he saw entering the room.
"Hello, Jarod." her voice said.
Jarod turned around and found the person he had made the date with: Miss Parker.
"Good evening, my lovely…"wife"?! With my deep regret I notice you haven't broken the habit of pointing a weapon at me." he answered, while watching her 9 mm aimed at his chest.
Miss Parker was smiling.
"You were such a silly boy to invite me here. Your message was almost touching…"
...
Miss Parker was talking with Sydney and Broots when she got that e-mail. The sender was anonymous, but he wrote in Jarod's style. While the two men argued about Raines' changes since he became the leader of The Centre, the woman read the message greedily.
Parker, it's time to stop playing games.
I'm tired of our "I run, you chase" relationship.
I'll be waiting for you tonight at New Haven Hotel, come alone.
If you don't come, I'll understand.
Without saying another word, Parker took her coat and disappeared bound for Connecticut and leaving Sydney and Broots asking themselves what had happened to her.
...
Jarod stared at Miss Parker intensely, he wanted her to understand everything and, most of all, he had never wished so much before that she wasn't so stubborn.
"It was not one of your greatest ideas to date me here tonight." She continued, always smiling. "And now, we're going home."
"I see you continue to talk about The Centre as your "home"…"
Miss Parker suddenly changed her look and pressed him: "I'm tired of chasing you all around United States, I want go back to living my life without it passing me by, Jarod."
"That's weird." he answered, making a step forward. "That's what I'd love to do since I ran away".
"Freeze Jarod. Don't make me cuff you. It's gonna be easier if you don't resist."
"The pity is, Miss Parker…if you shoot me, you couldn't go home so unnoticed as you wish." he replied, approaching her gradually.
"I'm calling Sam and we're taking you away together."
"So you were so kind to come without your lovely sweepers…I wonder why this doesn't surprise me at all."
Now Jarod knew that Parker's behavior was dictated by a unique feeling: fear. She came alone, she hadn't told anyone where she was going, and Jarod knew that for sure.
...
Sydney answered the phone after a few seconds: "Miss Parker?"
"No, it's me – Jarod replied – I was actually looking for her, Sydney. She isn't answering me either."
"She left a couple of hours ago and didn't say where she was going. She said she had to do something alone and asked us to let her be." Sydney explained.
Jarod smiled, even if he didn't like lying his mentor: "I'll find another time to harass her, then. See you soon, Syd."
He ended the phone call and went on driving towards New Haven.
...
Miss Parker took her mobile from the coat pocket and made Jarod understand she was not afraid at all to call somebody and advise that she caught him. But Jarod was tired of those games. He hadn't come all that way to lose time, he had something important to tell her.
The woman dialed Sydney's number and waited for the call to begin. Jarod looked at her annoyed, then he moved suddenly towards her and took the phone, stopping the call exactly while Sydney was answering, then he threw it across the room. Now Parker was looking at him a little afraid, her gun tip was by then touching Jarod's chest.
He looked at her like he was challenging her to do something.
"You shouldn't have done that, boy genius."
"I'm tired of all this, Parker" Jarod started and with every sentence, he made a step forward forcing her to move back towards the wall.
"I'm tired of this stupid relationship between us where you are a hunter and I'm your prey…I'm tired of hiding my real feelings…and above all I'm tired of pretending I'm running from you while all I really want to do is stay with you."
Parker had her shoulders at the wall and Jarod got the gun from her hands, then threw it on the couch and leaned his hands on the wall, closing her inside his hold. Their faces were very close and Parker couldn't wriggle from his presence. She could just avoid looking inside his eyes, because if she did that, she knew it would be the end.
"Look at me, Parker…" he said. The woman didn't want to and shook her head, without speaking.
"Look – at – me I said." he repeated, articulating the words one by one.
Parker gave up and raised her eyes. She saw a harsh look on Jarod's face. It was the same look he had whenever she tried to deny the truth. But it lasted just a moment, because after a few seconds he had that lost-puppy-look again and seemed to be begging her.
Jarod took his hands off the wall and stood upright, releasing her from his hold. Then he stroked her hair and smiled.
"Jarod…"
"Enough talking." he concluded.
Then it happened. He pulled her to him and kissed her. It was a kiss having any kind of feeling in it: passion, rage, love, pain, madness, resent and, above all, regret. It had been kept for too long, but now they couldn't pretend anymore. Parker let herself go completely for a few seconds, she couldn't dare stand back. Feeling their desire growing, they move back across the room and start taking off their respective jackets. Then Parker winced and sent away Jarod, shouting: "No!"
After turning him away, she made for the couch looking for the gun he had thrown away a few minutes before, but Jarod stopped her taking her by the hand.
"This time you're not running anymore, Parker." he told her, while he pulled her towards himself, hugging her.
"Let me go!" she shouted.
"No…That's not what you really want!" he whispered her ear.
Trying to wriggle, she forced herself not to wince again when she felt his hands holding her tightly, but gently.
Parker whirled round and slapped him, forcing him to let her go. Upset at what she had just done, she hid her face with her hands and turned her back, looking at the window. Jarod had expected such a reaction and touched his cheek almost amused by the situation, but he knew exactly what to say.
"Parker…It's always been you…since we were kids at The Centre…the only important person in my life, it was you…you can't even imagine how much…"
Miss Parker was wide-eyed now; she felt she couldn't hold back her tears for long.
"I wrote if you didn't come, I'd understand. But now you're here and I won't allow you to spoil this moment, even if it means I have to disappear forever from your life."
Parker was staring at the windows now, but didn't have the strength to turn back. Jarod, instead, piled it on: "And this time I won't give you clues or mental games to let you find me. I'll be a ghost, and you won't have to bear my presence anymore. So, is that what you want?"
Miss Parker couldn't turn back, not now. She was definitely crying. Jarod, on the contrary, kept hoping she would stop him, she would react and admit her real feelings for him.
He waited a few seconds more, then he understood it was a lost cause. He knew what to do.
Miss Parker squeezed her eyes and found her courage. Would everything end that way? How much she would repent in the years to come if she did not stop Jarod when she could?
She whirled round and found Jarod was gone. The door was ajar and she ran towards the corridor, calling him out loud "Jarod! Jarod!"
There was no trace of him. The elevator was going down, she'd have never reached him.
She came back in the room and closed the door behind her, bursting into tears.
"Silly, fool! What did you expect, he would wait for you forever?" she shouted at herself.
She dried out her eyes and shrugged, trying to regain control of herself. What she would tell Sydney?
She turned around again and found Jarod was there, in front of her. She was speechless.
"I needed to know if you were ready." he whispered moving close to her. "Now I know you are."
He took her hands in his and gave her a kiss on the forehead. Parker smiled and dried her face, with Jarod's help.
After a tense laugh, she kissed him again. Tenderly, as if she had something to be forgiven for.
"I'm sorry I slapped you" she explained.
"I know you're a tough woman…I also have a whip and some studs in that suitcase…" he replied, leaning his forehead against hers. Parker laughed serenely and tightened her arms around his neck.
They stood like that for a few seconds, savoring that moment because everything seemed so easy. When Parker started panicking, she stared at him. "What are we gonna do?"
"We'll think about that tomorrow. Tonight, it's just us"
"What did you have in mind?" she asked, teasing him.
Jarod smiled and tripped her, making her fall onto the bed. Parker burst out laughing and so did he, while he was lying next to her. Their laughs became a tense silence when he started stroking her arm.
"Are you nervous?" he asked her.
Even if the answer she had in her mind was "yes", Miss Parker knew she wasn't nervous at all. That man next to her had always known her, better that anyone else. He helped her defeat ghosts from her past and find out the truth about her family. He guided her away from that numbness The Centre had forced her to live in for years.
"No. I'm happy." she concluded.
Jarod smiled and closed his eyes for a second, afraid that maybe, if he'd opened them, he would find it had been a dream. When he felt ready, he lifted his eyelids. Parker was still there, with her vast light blue eyes staring at him. And when he saw her smiling and moving close to him to be held, he understood he had done the right thing.
NEW HAVEN HOTEL – NEW HAVEN, CONNECTICUT
7.45 a.m.
When Miss Parker woke up the morning after, she found herself convinced it all must have been a dream. But when she realized she was not in her bed and she was completely naked, she understood she couldn't be farther from the truth.
Jarod and her. It was true.
She stretched her arm to touch the pillow next to her, but he wasn't there. So she rolled over and saw the other part of the bed was empty. Had he gone away without saying anything?
Then she heard the noise of the shower coming from the bathroom. She stood up and put on the bathrobe, then she glanced at the gun on the couch. Feeling she wouldn't have need for it anymore, she took it just as Jarod was coming out the bathroom. He had a towel around his waist and another one in his hand, to dry his hair. He looked at her suspiciously, without saying anything at all. But Parker opened the gun and took off the loader, showing him it was completely empty.
Jarod smiled and put his hands on her arms.
"I took it…just to scare you." She whispered while he kissed her. "I'd never hurt you, you know that?"
"Sure." He answered "But thank you for confessing this, it must have cost you a lot"
"You have no idea!" she laughed.
"Why don't you have a shower…I'm going to alert Sydney and Broots that you're fine."
"Ok." she answered.
While Parker focused on herself, Jarod saw to the more obvious business. First he got dressed, then he called Sydney with Parker's mobile.
"Parker, thank God! Where are you, everyone's going crazy at The Centre!"
"It's Jarod, Sydney" He answered "And don't worry, Miss Parker is very fine"
"Jarod where are you? Do you need any help? Something happened?" he asked, very worried.
Jarod smiled. "We're just reconciling ourselves with the past…to be prepared for the future."
"What do you mean? Jarod?"
But the communication had already ended, and Jarod had left Sydney as always: without any precise answers.
Shortly after he called room service and made sure the florist he had seen the night before on his way to the hotel brought some roses for Parker, and promised a lavish tip if they would do everything in ten minutes.
When everything was ready, Jarod looked at his work on the table. His plan to "conquer" Parker wasn't over yet. That was another step: sweeten her with a superb breakfast.
Jarod realized he got the desired effect when he saw the surprise in Miss Parker's eyes when she came out the bathroom dressed up and perfect in every detail. She also put on that perfume he adored and he hadn't smelled often since he ran away from The Centre.
"What is this?" she asked.
"Breakfast, Miss Parker…By the way, you think I could start calling you by name, sooner or later?"
"No. You made me a promise years ago, remember?" she asked.
...
"Look what a beautiful calligraphy you have…I like the way you write, Jarod"
Miss Parker and the boy genius were sharing one of those rare moments when he had a break from simulations, so they were writing their signatures on papers, trying to involve Angelo too.
"Come on Angelo, that's not your name!" Jarod says, when he saw the boy writing "Timmy" on the paper.
Miss Parker wrote her entire name, speaking out loud.
"I like your first name." Jarod said "Why am I not supposed to call you by your first name?"
"My mother was the only one who could call me like that…I don't want anyone to say it anymore, promise me you won't tell anybody what my name is…If you are my friend, swear it!"
"I promise, Miss Parker."
...
"Ok, I'm going to continue calling you as you wish, Miss Parker."
"Thank you, Jarod."
"Now it's my turn to say something…And please, let me finish, because it's very important that you understand"
"All right." she whispered.
Jarod breathed and let her drink some fruit juice, then he started.
"I've always known I loved you…Since we were kids at The Centre…My simulations were dreadful, and I had no friends, apart from Angelo. Then you came…They introduced you into my life as another experiment, to see what kind of effect you would have had on me…But they didn't know what I felt."
Parker swallowed, holding in a sigh.
"We've been through so many things you and me, at The Centre…But then you grew up and you father sent you to study in Europe, so we were separated the one from the other and you forgot me. But I never stopped asking other people where you were."
...
"Jarod, you must get over it, Miss Parker is not coming back." answered Sydney to a little more than eighteen year old Jarod.
"It's not possible Syd…She must come back…She promised me."
"By now she won't even remember who you are, Jarod! She's living her life and so you must do, going on with yours…"
"No, she promised me she would come back and we both would leave The Centre, together." he answered, thinking about that moment shared with her 5 years before.
"Then you must believe this…" he concluded, giving Jarod a Miss Parker hand-written note. It was her calligraphy, he knew it.
You were a good friend to me, Jarod.
But now you must forget me: I'm leaving and I can't take you with me.
We won't meet anymore.
Goodbye.
...
"I never wrote that note, Jarod." she whispered.
"I know. But at that time I was convinced you abandoned me and you would really forget me."
"In a way that happened, Jarod." She answered, feeling her guilt surfacing "I had a lot of fun in my school years, I had friends and men…And I forgot everything that ever happened to me when I was a kid at The Centre. I think that was a kind of self-defense that disappeared only when they called me back to…hunt you."
Jarod nodded ruefully.
"It was a mistake to forget you, Jarod. I forgot who I really was." she said.
"The day you came back." He continued, almost if he had ignored her. "Sydney told me. He knew I had been tormented by your absence for years, even if eventually I got over it."
Parker followed his speech hanging on every word he said.
"Maybe you won't believe me…But you were one of the reasons that pushed me to run away from The Centre. I wanted to meet you too much."
Parker was incredulous. "Your mother, your father…Your family…"
Jarod shook his head. "Yes, I wanted to find them at any cost, and I started looking for them as soon as I ran…But before I had to see you…The day after my escape, I came back to Blue Cove and started looking for you…You were out with a couple of friends of yours, later I found out they were your college mates. You were drinking something in a bar and you looked so happy…"
Parker focused on that memory and remembered the only night she went out with her schoolmates to talk about old times. That had been one of the most trivial and monotonous nights in her whole life.
"Then you went home and as soon as you got inside your living room, I saw you lying on the couch with a scotch glass in one hand…and a picture of Catherine in the other."
Parker couldn't hold back a tear.
"That was the moment I understood my purpose: not only would I have to find my family and avenge other people's injuries…I would also have to find out who actually killed Catherine, so that I could regain your trust…"
"Jarod…"
He took her hand from the other side of the table and squeezed it.
"You were so incredibly beautiful, Miss Parker…Even more than I remembered…You've had all, though you were still that sad kid I met at The Centre. I looked at you for a while, from the window, but I was too much intimidated to go in and greet you…I was sure you wouldn't have recognized me at all. And you know the rest…"
Jarod stood up and walked over to The Centre of the room, his arms folded. Parker reached him and made him turn towards her: "If you had come inside that night, and told me everything you said now…We would have been spared these years of chasing, Jarod."
He seemed skeptical. "You'd never have believed me…Your father and Mr. Raines tried to coax you and you started hunting me."
"They filled me with lies for years, and I bitterly regret I believed what they told me…But now I'm here, and I'm asking you to forgive me for being so selfish, weak and blind."
"You don't need my forgiveness if you won't forgive yourself first."
"But it can put me on the right track." she replied, smiling.
"You can't imagine how much I've waited for you, Parker." he whispered, stroking her hair.
"I hope it's worth it, Jarod. I don't want to deceive you."
"You won't. The past is officially past: now let's stick to the future."
"Together." she concluded.
Jarod kissed her and hugged her. He finally conquered her heart, now Parker was really his.
"I love you." he said without letting go of her.
Parker was initially surprised to hear herself answering "I love you too". But then she understood those words had been hid deeply inside her for years. Now she wouldn't have to lie to herself anymore.
...
The future. Together.
