Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or these characters. But they sure are fun to play with. :)
Her hands were in my hair. Her lips soft and moving under mine. I pulled her closer, her soft curves fit perfectly against me.
That was the moment.
Now pacing this sterile linoleum floor, all my thoughts are of her. Of that first kiss.
"Jake?" Charlie's gruff voice cuts through my reverie and stops my pacing. He gives me an awkward smile. "What are you doing out here, son? Is she—"
I rub a hand over my face. I'm exhausted. I've been here at the hospital since the early morning hours.
"I just—" I clear my throat and try to speak through the tightness. "—needed a minute."
Charlie clasps a hand on my shoulder, and smiles ruefully. There is a knowing glint, an understanding in his dark eyes and weathered face. "I'll just go check on her, then."
I nod. He disappears down the hallway and I collapse in a chair, leaning my elbows on my knees, my face in my hands.
Even after that kiss, she chose him. She broke my heart. But worse than that day was the day I watched her marry another man.
She was all flushed pink cheeks, waves of chocolate hair, dressed in white. I wanted to kill him. I wanted to rip his heart out. Because that was what he was doing to me. Killing her, turning her into one of them, was the same as if he had reached in and tore my still beating heart from my chest. I wanted to beg her to stay. I wanted to kiss her one last time.
But I didn't. I told her goodbye. I tried to let her go.
"Hey jackass," a snarly feminine voice jolts me back. I look up as Leah plops down in the seat next to me. "What the hell are you doing out here? Where's your leech lover?
I glare at her. Through clenched teeth I growl, "That is not funny."
She rolls her eyes. I narrow mine.
"Sensitive subject, Leah."
Leah's face turns from sarcastic and amused to concern. "Did something...I mean is she doing okay?"
I swallow hard and nod. She's fine. I'm the one freaking out. I'm the one overwhelmed by emotions so big they are threatening to swallow me up.
She sighs, pats me awkwardly on the back and stands up. This is a lot of affection from Leah Clearwater. "I'm going to go grab us a couple of sodas."
She doesn't wait for me to answer.
Warm sodas, cold hands.
I shake my head to clear my thoughts and take a deep breath.
It was Leah who kicked my ass when I was still moping around after Bella left. Quil and Embry who took me out and got me drunk (no easy feat). It was working on cars that kept my hands busy. A string of pretty girls that kept me warm at night.
I moved to Port Angeles after high school. I had a job, an apartment, and a sometimes girlfriend. It was three years later when she showed up on my doorstep.
She stood up quickly from where she sat on the floor in front of my apartment as I came walking down the hall. Then she hastily wiped the tears from her cheeks.
"Jake, I—" her eyes quickly traveled over my shoulder to the pretty blonde and down to my hand clasped with hers. "Oh, um, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to—"
She was flustered, her cheeks flushed and more tears filled her eyes.
I wanted to be angry. I wanted to yell at her for coming here now. But I couldn't.
Maybe even then...
Those words echoed in my head. And my eyes took in the sight before me. Pink cheeks, brown eyes.
The pretty blonde said goodnight and I let Bella stay. Because it didn't matter why she was here. All that matter was that she was here and her heart was still beating.
"Jacob," my father's voice jolts me from my memories. I look up to see him and my sister Rachel coming down the hall. "Where's Bella? Can we see her?"
Leah saves me from answering. She hands me a soda as she says, "Come on, I'll show you."
My father regards me thoughtfully for one long moment before he nods and him and Rachel follow Leah down the hall.
It was two weeks that she stayed in my apartment before I kissed her.
I came home from work to find Bella snuggled up on the couch, clutching a tissue, clad in my sweats and an old faded t-shirt. The clothes swallowed her. Her hair was messy, her cheeks flushed. She'd never looked more beautiful.
I plopped down next her, pulled her into my arms. When her crying stopped, she looked up at me with those big dark pools of chocolate. Her lips were slightly parted, her breath coming short and fast. I tipped her chin up with my thumb and leaned forward to brush my lips against hers.
And just my luck, that fucking bloodsucking bastard showed up.
A sudden chill creeps up my spine. I look around quickly, sniff the air. I guess I'm being paranoid to think he'd actually show up now.
He looked awful that night. I actually felt sorry for him. Because I remembered what it felt like when she left me.
But this time, she chose me.
"Jake," I look up. My dad, Charlie, my sister, and Leah are all there. "It's time."
I walk down the long white hallway. My palms are sweaty, my heartbeat's erratic. When I get to her door, I take a deep breath before I turn the knob and walk in.
Her face lights up when she sees me. She's glowing. I sit down in the chair next to her hospital bed and take both her hands in mine. I kiss her knuckles.
She smiles and threads her fingers through my hair.
"Hey, are you okay?" she asks quietly.
I nod. "Yeah, are you in pain?"
She shakes her head, smiles and then winks at me. "No, they gave me the good stuff."
A short pause, her brow furrows. "Where did you go?"
"I was just thinking," I tell her truthfully. The way she's looking at me now, her fingers in my hair, I'd tell her anything. Give her everything.
"Everything's going to be okay, you know," she murmurs. There is a strength and conviction in her voice that I never knew she possessed.
"I know, honey. You know how much I love you don't you?"
She smiles. "Of course." She pauses and squints at me. After a minute she sighs. "Jake, I chose you, remember?"
I nod and fight the tears gathering in my eyes.
She struggles to sit up, cups my face in her hands. Passionately she whispers, "I chose you, us, this life. Every day."
"But what if—"
She shakes her head and cuts me off with a swift kiss. "No. I. Choose. You. "
She places my hand on her swollen belly. "I choose this," she whispers softly.
I kiss her. Her lips are soft and warm, and open against mine.
"I love you," I whisper.
An hour later, I am in awe, a small bundle cradled in my arms. My chest swells with love and affection. Her eyes are dark and wide. A shock of black hair sits atop her head. Her bottom lip is slightly fuller than the top.
She's my daughter. Our daughter.
