John waited alone. Several hours passed as he sat in a small room just outside the recovery area. He alternated between staring out a small window into the darkness and sitting with his head buried in his hands most of night. These moments alone in misery were too familiar - much like his long tortuous nights in prison. Only now he didn't know if Anna was safe.
It took everything in him not to shout at the staff for more answers. They had assured him, there were none. Only the passing of time could reveal if everything would be all-right. He labored in grief as the seconds passed slowly.
An older nurse took careful attention of him, finally persuading a phone call be made to someone for support. John called Mrs. Hughes and spoke very little, because he knew even less.
By morning Mrs. Hughes, Lady Mary and Lord Grantham arrived to meet Mr. Bates at the hospital. He looked beyond tired. He was weary, worn and needed a shave. He hadn't eaten a thing since bringing Anna to this hospital more than twenty-four hours ago.
"Mr. Bates, I'm glad you finally called us. I only wish you had called sooner, we would have come right away." Mrs. Hughes grabbed hold of his arm and assured him of her intention to stay there through this.
"Thank you." was all John could manage to say.
"Bates, is there a doctor we could talk to? I would like more details." Lord Grantham asked with deep kindness in his face.
John looked at them, but through them. As he spoke, he recalled the final moments before they arrived. "I should have gotten her here sooner, but she was so strongly against it. I couldn't understand why but she insisted the pain was normal. I knew it wasn't...I feel so foolish, we wasted valuable time."
"You don't know that Bates, these things can be so complicated, and with it being her first pregnancy...how could she know anything was truly wrong?" Mary pulled up a chair and sat beside him near the window.
"I'm going to find the doctor," and with that Lord Grantham left the room with a determined walk. He was always awkward in these types of situations. Still, he wanted to be there for Bates, knowing that John had always been by his side through the worst of times.
After he left the room, Mr. Bates spoke up. "They won't tell him anything...they don't know anything more than I've already said." He vsat up in his chair and breathed a heavy sigh of frustration, "why won't they let me see her? I just want to sit with her. She shouldn't be alone, even if she is unconscious."
Lady Mary and Mrs Hughes both looked at one another concerned.
Mrs. Hughes tried softly to distract him. "Mr. Bates, you should have something to eat, or at least to drink, I'm going to fetch you some tea, you'll need your strength for when Anna awakens," she patted him on the shoulder and left the room as Lord Grantham returned looking just as frustrated as he did when he left. He stopped and stood at the door to the room.
Mary met her fathers eyes and he motioned with his head for her to leave the room so he and John could talk alone. Mary placed her hand on Johns' and said quietly, "I'm going to see if I can find Mrs. Hughes, I'll be right back." John stood respectfully as she left then sat down again while passing his hand through his hair.
With a deep look of concern on his brow, Lord Grantham sat beside John and stared at him with compassion. "Bates, what have you not told the ladies?"
John swallowed hard and looked at Lord Grantham, knowing he was asking in friendship for his confidence. As John considered what to say, tears pooled in his eyes until one escaped, streaming down his left cheek as he began, "the baby lived for only a few minutes, I heard it cry...her...it was a little girl. They asked if I wanted to hold her after she died. But I couldn't. Not without Anna, it didn't seem fair."
John swallowed hard and looked out the window continuing, "she was so small, I can't believe how tiny...a little life... It was incredible and horrible all in one moment... Anna never saw her."
"I'm so sorry," Lord Grantham said with tears in his own eyes. He knew too well the pain of losing a child. A grown daughter, an unborn son, and Mathew, who he loved as a son. He was too familiar with the death of those he loved most.
"How will I... ever tell Anna? She was as happy as I've ever seen her, the past few months, preparing...anticipating."
"There is no easy way Bates, I'm sorry to say. With all the tragedy in my own life, I know only this...It does not get easier to say or accept. But you will find a way."
John wiped his face with his hand and looked back out the window as the morning grew long.
"Bates. I want you to know, I will do everything within my power to support you and Anna through this. When Anna is well, we will prepare a proper funeral for your daughter and I will cover all the medical expenses necessary for Anna to recover."
John looked back at Robert, clearly touched by his words, "m'Lord, I can not ask you to do this."
"You're not asking. I'm telling you, this is the way it will be. You saved my life once long ago. Now allow me to do what I can to save Anna's.
John swallowed back tears, and looking defeated but very appreciative as he responded, " thank you m' lord."
Lady Mary and Mrs. Hughes quietly returned to the room both carrying cups of tea. They all sat together for the next hour mostly in silence, sipping the warm tea and waiting for news from the doctor.
At 10 am the morning nurse came into the room and announced, "the doctor will be in momentarily, he is finishing up with Mrs. Bates now."
John stood up quickly, his heart sinking into his stomach. What would the doctor report? He couldn't loose Anna too. Not after all they had survived this far together. John did not want to not live without her. The doctor entered and looked around the room at everyone then met John's eyes and hesitated for a moment.
"Doctor, you may speak freely, these are my employers and..."
"We're his friends," Lord Grantham quickly interrupted as he stood up and corrected Mr. Bates.
John looked at him uncomfortable but with grateful and kind eyes for saying such an honoring thing.
The doctor began to speak, "Mrs. Bates is running a very high fever, I'm afraid we will have to operate at once, I need your consent."
"Operate?" Lady Mary was the first to react to this news.
"I don't understand, what sort of operation?" asked a tired and confused John.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Bates. But in order to save your wife's life, we will have to perform a rather new procedure. There were complications with the birth and we will need to do this right away." The doctor spoke with great urgency.
"Is it dangerous? Will it...effect her ability to have children?" John's face was pale and he looked exhausted.
I'm afraid, I just don't know," the doctor confessed.
Mrs. Hughes reacted to the news by covering her mouth and gasping. Lady Mary grabbed hold of John's arm as he sat back down. "Then... there might never be children?" A look of fear overcame him.
"This procedure is still very new and we don't have many results on the long term effect. But It will save her life. Perhaps one day she will conceive again, only I can not answer that question at this time. I'm very sorry."
"Is this the only option then?" Lord Grantham pursued more answers.
"Yes. I'm afraid it is. We were hoping she would improve over night but she has only gotten worse. I've had several opinions on the matter, she will not survive without this procedure." The doctor insisted. "Please, I need your consent now."
John looked up at him in disbelief but gave his consent to operate on Anna. "Yes, yes, do whatever you need to do. You must save her."
The doctor nodded his head then left the room. Lord Grantham followed him into the hall, "Doctor, please, spare no expense to do whatever you can for Anna. I will cover the cost. Do you understand?"
"Of course," and with that, the doctor left Lord Grantham standing alone in the hallway.
