Once there was a Horrid Maiden...wait a minute, I think it's just Little Miss Dizzy wearing a mask. "Hey!" said a voice. It was Little Miss Scary. "Stop trying to scare people, Miss Dizzy," said Miss Scary. "That's my job!" She took the mask from Miss Dizzy.

Anyway, once there was a Porridge Maiden (still Miss Dizzy) who lived in Meadowlark Lemon's duffel bag from the 70's.

One day, she caught an ocelot for to sup. Because at one point those words meant something. "I hate Mondays," said the ocelot. Then he looked behind him and said, "Sup, Jim Davis's lawyers?"

He then said to the Porridge Maiden, "Rob Morrow to you. You must find a husband by sunrise or Doom 2 bad guys will come out of my ears!" "That doesn't make any sense," said the Porridge Maiden. "I know," said the ocelot. "Mr. Dudeman doesn't even play that game! I wonder how the reference even ended up in the script." "Strong Bad put it in there," said the Porridge Maiden. "Anyway," said the ocelot, "why don't you go see the Statue of Liberty's deadbeat cousin to start with? Just wander, or, in your case, spin, over yonder to find him."

So the Porridge Maiden spun over yonder to the Statue of Liberty's deadbeat cousin.


As you already know, Miss Dizzy, one of my OCs, plays the Porridge Maiden in this story. Mr. Bounce plays the ocelot, and the Statue of Liberty's deadbeat cousin (AKA the Butcher) is played by Mr. Greedy. And by the way, the "Horrid Maiden" is, indeed, Miss Dizzy wearing a mask. Notice how the ocelot tells the Porridge Maiden to wander, or, in her case, spin, over yonder to find the Statue of Liberty's deadbeat cousin. Even though I've never seen Wander Over Yonder (at least, not yet, anyway), I still referenced it. In later chapters, everyone she talks to will tell her to spin over yonder to the next character.