Author's Note: Little one shots that fit into Loathing but explain more of the relationship between Elphaba and Galinda. This one takes place between Chapters 4 and 5 of Loathing.

Warning: Sort-of Gelphie, sort-of not. Take it how you will.

Summary: Shiz University saw one side of Galinda and Elphaba, and their tepid relationship, but behind their dormitory doors acts occur that should not and secrets are kept that can tear friends apart. How far will one friend go to make another happy? And how long will the other allow such selflessness to occur?

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Forbidden Secrets

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Chapter One: Confessions

Elphaba nearly flinched as the door to her shared dorm room burst opened. She nearly flinched because she caught herself at the last moment and was able to hide her initial reaction – brought on, she told herself, by instincts and not any actual caring feelings for her blonde roommate. She didn't look up from her book as she heard Miss Galinda sigh excessively and drop dramatically onto her fluffy pink and white bedding. There was silence for many minutes as the green girl in the crammed room tried her best to ignore the sniffles and barely held back sobs coming from the blonde girl on the opposite side of the room.

Eventually Elphaba could stand it no longer and she closed her book, unfolded her legs from where they had been twisted up against her body, and turned her head to finally look at the annoying blonde that was, once again, being far more dramatic than necessary. "Did something go amiss Miss Galinda?" Elphaba asked and her voice was flat; it was obvious she did not truly care about Galinda's well-being.

"What does it matter to you?" Galinda spat out as she raised her head so that she was no longer staring at her hands. "You don't really care!"

"You're right," Elphaba said as she opened her book again; balanced it against her knee as she crossed her legs underneath her.

"Then why did you even ask?" Galinda's voice was suddenly choked and desperate.

"I hoped to cease this insufferable crying of yours."

There was silence again and the wind came in through the opened window; blew a few papers off of Galinda's vanity and scattered them against the ground. "Avaric's an asshole," Galinda suddenly said and this time Elphaba's did flinch as it was the first time she had ever heard the blonde say anything that was even remotely close to a swear word.

"I already knew that," Elphaba eventually replied; once she had gathered her composure again. She didn't take her eyes off of her book because she didn't want Galinda to see the small glimmer of emotion – of caring – she knew was pooling in her eyes. They weren't friends… she was not to care for the blonde.

"He tried to have sex with me."

Elphaba's head snapped up at Galinda's confession and it was clear that the blonde was saying what she was saying only because she felt she needed to tell someone without the fear of what had happening being spread around the school. Elphaba's brown eyes were wide with horror at the fact that any boy in the school would dare to even try such a thing with a fellow student.

"He tried to rape you?" she breathed and suddenly her desire to keep Galinda at a distant was gone. There was an animalistic, uncontrollable urge building up inside of her to reach out to the blonde sitting across from her; with her make-up smudged and running down her face. She had a desire within her to reach out to the first person she had ever known of who might understand some measure of her pain.

But that was the past, Elphaba reasoned with herself as she tried to bury her memories and emotions away. That was the past and this was now and no one could know. No one could ever know. So she kept her silence and simply watched Galinda as the blonde fidgeted with her clothing and stared at the ground – obviously uneasy about the confession she had made to her strange green roommate.

"Miss Elphaba," Galinda said slowly, measuring her words carefully, "have you ever had sex?"

There was a moment of hesitation and as Galinda looked up she saw a flicker of grief and despair flash across Elphaba's eyes before a resounding "No!" – harsher than need be – burst from green lips. Silence, it hung thick in the air along with the truth that lingered beneath Elphaba's forceful denial.

Galinda Upland was many things but she was not entirely stupid and she prided herself on her ability to read people. And as she watched her green roommate carefully, even as Elphaba averted her eyes to the ground, she realized the bitter truth. "You're lying," Galinda said. "You've had sex, haven't you?"

Silence. "I have not."

Galinda's words were not sugar-coated with the false pretense of friendship or society for she told herself, even if it was a lie, that she did not truly care about the green girl's well-being or worth. "You were raped then, were you not?" the blonde coldly asked as she found that within Elphaba's presence she spoke more plainly, more directly, and asked questions she would never normally consider uttering to any living person. "I wouldn't be surprise," Galinda continued but her voice was barely audible and she was fearful of angering Elphaba to the point of violence. "People are cruel to those who are different."

"You're cruel to those who are different," Elphaba spat out as she kept her eyes on her book even though she had long ago stopped reading. It was almost a confession, Galinda realized, and she let the heavy silence fall at the truthful words that her green roommate had spoken. She found that her curiosity was getting harder to ignore and she desperately wished for Elphaba to say more on the despairing topic they were discussing but those thin green lips stayed shut. Galinda sighed heavily and twirled a limp curl between her fingers.

Elphaba stood up then, shocking Galinda with the sudden movement, and kneeled down beside her bed. She lifted the mattress off the bedspring just enough to reach into the darkness. Galinda watched and, to her surprise, caught sight of a glimmer of a knife and a blood-stained cloth. She felt her stomach drop and her mouth go dry at what such things could imply but she reminded herself that they were not friends, would never be friends, and that she need not concern herself with the green bean's well-being. But even as she told herself such things she could not shake the terror that had gripped her over what she had just seen.

Then Elphaba dropped the mattress – having received what she wanted – and made her way towards her roommate, breaking the terrifying spell that had surrounded Galinda. As the blonde looked up she saw a small smile teasing Elphaba's face, almost warming the cold tone of green skin, and was shocked out of her brief moment of fearful concern. Elphaba took a rather large drink from the bottle she had retrieved from her hiding spot between her mattresses and then handed it towards Galinda before sitting down besides the blonde – making sure to keep a comfortable distance between them.

"What is it?" Galinda asked tentatively as she brought her nose to the bottle's lip and grimaced at the smell.

"Whiskey," Elphaba replied with a barely suppressed smirk tugging at her lips. She knew Galinda did not drink much and when she did it was almost exclusively wine, or pretty little punch-drinks with only a drop or two of any real alcohol, and she was expectantly amused of how the blonde beside her would react to such a strong drink.

"Avaric tried to get me drunk," Glinda said and her voice began to shake as she remembered how terrified she had been for that brief moment when she thought Avaric was not going to listen to her protests.

"I'm not going to use you," Elphaba said and Galinda noted, with curiosity, how Elphaba had avoided the word 'rape'. Was it a clue? Galinda thought it was but with Elphaba one could never be certain. For all Galinda knew the green girl was simply playing her.

"Well," Elphaba prodded, "are you going to have any? Because if you're not I will gladly take it back for myself."

Warning alarms went off in Galinda's head as she could imagine the green girl's words coming out of her own mother's mouth – and that scared her slightly. Her mother was under the deathly grip of alcohol and she had a sudden panic surge through her that Miss Elphaba could be very much the same. They are just words, the logical part of Galinda's mind told her. Besides, Miss Elphaba can take care of herself. You are not her friend, do not concern yourself with her.

Galinda took a small sip from the bottle and nearly choked at the strong taste in her mouth. Elphaba laughed at the blonde's reaction and the sound shocked Galinda so much that she very nearly spit out the whiskey. She covered her mouth with her hand and closed her eyes as she tried to keep some semblance of dignity and swallow her drink. When she had collected herself, and forced the bitter whiskey down her throat, she looked at Elphaba and was surprised at what she saw. The sun was setting and in the flickering light of the fireplace the garish hue of her roommate's green skin was softened and her brown eyes, flecked with green, were bright and alert and full of so much knowledge and experience. It all made her look wild and other-worldly and, in her own strange way, even beautiful.

Elphaba watched in shock as Galinda swallowed a rather large gulp of whiskey before handing the bottle back. Her green hand gently grazed Galinda's pale one as the bottle traded hands but before Elphaba could take another drink she found her mouth occupied by something very much unexpected.

The green girl stiffened as Glinda's lips landed on her own. The bottle of whiskey slipped from Elphaba's hand and fell to the floor. It did not break but the sound it created startled both girl's and caused Galinda to pull away. The whiskey poured onto the wood floor as Elphaba stared at the blonde before her in complete and utter shock.

"That was the whiskey acting, right?" Elphaba asked, her voice shaking, as she brought her fingers up to gently touch her green lips in startled surprise and confusion. She could still taste the berry flavor of Galinda's lipstick on her own lips and it was all making her head spin and her thoughts jumble together. She didn't like this feeling of being so uncertain of what had happened and of what was to come. She prided herself on always knowing how to act but at that very moment she had no clue, not even a tiny inclination, of what she should say or do – if anything.

Glinda smiled shyly and dropped her head slightly but continued to look Elphaba directly in the eyes. "I suppose so…" she said but her tone of voice and the way she trailed off made Elphaba doubt the blonde's words.

"What are you getting at? Playing like this?" Elphaba asked. She had meant for her words to be harsher, angrier, but they came out as a trembling whisper that made her feel pathetic and uncertain of herself.

"I just wanted to try it out," Galinda replied as a small smirk grew on her face. "See what it was like. And to see if the rumours were true."

"Rumours!" Elphaba shrieked. She stood up then and realized that she had been foolish; that she felt foolish. She had dared to hope that Galinda would be different and that this little conversation of theirs had been the beginning of at least a tolerant relationship. But she had been wrong, and now she felt utterly foolish and ridiculous for opening up to her stupid blonde roommate at all.

"I am not here for you to torment and play with!" Elphaba screamed as she let her anger overwhelm her because it was easier to be angry then to deal with how betrayed she felt. "I am not here for you to experiment on and screw with! I am not a toy to be played with! I am not an exhibition to gawk at! I show you some compassion and you throw it back in my face! How is it that you can be so damn cruel!"

Galinda was startled by Elphaba's outburst and a twinge of guilt settled in her stomach. "Look… I'm sorry. I don't know what overcame me. It was foolish. And you're right, it was the whiskey, nothing more."

Elphaba laid flashing eyes on Galinda before bending down and grabbing the now empty bottle of whiskey. In a moment of pure rage she threw it at the blonde and Galinda shrieked as she ducked and covered her head to protect herself as the bottle crashed into the wall behind her and the shattered glass showered down on her. She heard the door burst open and then slam shut but by the time she looked up her roommate was gone.

Elphaba's anger was thick in the air even long after she had left. It overwhelmed Galinda and she found it hard to breathe. Was it guilt? She didn't know but whatever it was it made her uneasy. So after a few minutes of the unbearable silence she stood up and set about to cleaning the glass from her bedding. When she was done she closed the window, because the cool wind had given her a chill, and set upon some reading to distract herself.

It was a couple hours later when Elphaba finally returned. She stood at the threshold of the room as the door closed behind her and looked at Galinda in bitter anger. "Why is the window closed?" she spat out.

Galinda looked up from her book as she laid huddled beneath the thick covers of her bed. "It was cold," she replied, her tone flat and devoid of any emotion. She was acting as impartial as she could because she wanted things to go back to how they had been – she wanted to go back to not caring for the strange green girl she was forced to roommate with. But she couldn't because there had been a shift in the world, a shift in the cosmos, and a shift in herself. It scared her a little but she tried her best to ignore the strange feeling.

"You know how I feel about the window being closed!" Elphaba barked.

Galinda sighed and though she desperately wanted to hate the green bean again she found that she simply could not. So she slid out of her bed and made her way to the window – undid the lock and opened it. The cold air burst in and sent a shiver up Galinda's spine but she tried her best to ignore it. She turned around to return to her bed but paused as she saw the shocked look on Elphaba's face.

"Goodnight Miss Elphaba," Galinda said with a small smile. "And thank you for the whiskey and… for listening."

It took a few moments before Elphaba could gather her racing thoughts to form a coherent answer. "You're… you're welcome," she stammered out as courtesies were not something she was accustomed to. "And… thank you," she hastily added even though she wasn't quite sure she knew what she was thanking the blonde for.

But Galinda smiled. And Elphaba smirked, but not unkindly. And when the sun rose on the morrow they found that the silence in the room wasn't as thick and awkward as it formerly was. And as the students openly mocked their strange green-coloured classmate Galinda made a conscious effort not to partake in such a cruel pastime. And Elphaba noticed.

And the window stayed open.