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I DON'T OWN LOTR!
Except for my characters. :p
*Me, sitting in front of the computer screen, rubbing hands together mischiviously. I am just about to type the first few words, when Crystal appears*
Crystal: "What are you doing?"
*Me, awkwardly turning round after being discovered, with a 'Oh Fuck' expression.
Me: "Nothing"
*Crystal grabs mouse and scrolls down, and starts to read*
"What are you writing?"
"Duh, a fan-based parody about me, you and Corran going to the LOTR Universe"
Crystal: :(
Me: :l
Crystal: *gasp* "Do we get to meet the Witch King?" :o
Me: *nod nod* "Yes, yes we do"
Crystal: :D
Chapter 1.
The first thing I felt, was the soft pressure of a warm morning breeze drifting along my face. As my conscience returned to me, I felt my hands clasp around something, but my hands, as I registered, were bent above my head, on the grass. And were laid either side of me, and in each of my two hands, was another two hands. I forced my eye's open, and flinched as white light pierced my vision. It quivered a second, before the vibrant flashes of green appeared and...
Aww fuck this, let's get on...
You know what, I'm just gonna skip the entire bullshit, fancy arse prolouge bit and skip to the best part, right. Cause this is just fucking killing me, cause this ain't even my style, I'm not some posh bitch of an author, ok.
Right, this is what really happened.
...
"Crystal, I would kindly appreciate it if you GOT THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM"
"NO"
"BUT..."
"I will get out of your room, WHEN YOU TELL ME WHERE YOU HID MR MUFFIN'S"
"Oh my God, you've locked yourself, in MY room, because you think Iv'e kidnapped your shit-coloured plushy"
"It's not shit colour, it's caramel"
"Fine, I hid Mr Muffins in the sock draw, happy"
I heard the distinctive sound of wood scraping against wood, and material being shuffled around.
"He smells like cheese"
"Dude, my feet don't smell that bad" I whined. "How do you know, do you sniff my socks?"
"Don't need to, I can smell them from here" She replied.
Ouch.
"Bitch"
Crystal, my young 12 year old sister, with thick curly locks of brown hair, and bright blue eye's. Opened my pristine white door, smirking, and cuddling Mr Muffins. I hated that stuffed animal, it was cute, but it was a skank.
"So..., what do you wanna do"
We stood there, glaring at each other, and then we both began to smile at the same time.
"LOTR"
10 minutes later.
We were here, sitting in front of the computer screen, eating popcorn, and watching one of the best movies ever. It was going well-ish, until there came a pop up.
"Stupid adverts" I mumbled.
I clicked on the window, and resumed the movie, 5 seconds later...
"You have mail"
Me and my sister, looked at each other, then at the screen. I clicked on the window and resume the movie agian.
"You have mail"
"Oh my God" I said face palming.
"I know we shouldn't do this, but can we just see what it is, because this is getting frustrating" said Crystal.
I inhaled deeply, before scroling down, minimising the screen, and clicking on the advert. Which linked straight to my email account. There, in small leters, was the sentence, Inbox: Survey. I wanted to punch the screen in, I hated it when this happened, but I wasn't violent, and enjoyed resolving things peacefully, so I calmly clicked on the new message on the inbox. And clicked on the tab to the survey. And then I began to think, this might actually be fun...
This web page appeared, with a parchment background, and the most basic writing ever. I turned to my sister.
"Question 1" I read aloud. "What's your favorite book series/book"
"Duh, Lord Of The Rings" Crystal said.
I typed in our answer.
"Question 2, What's your favorite video game/game"
"Obviously LOTRO"
I typed in Lord Of The Rings Online.
"Final Question, If you could go to an alternate dimension formed from your favorite novel, what would it be"
I turned to my sister, who was glaring strangley at the screen. I arched an eyebrow.
"You know what it is" she replied happily.
Satisfyied with her secret response, which I knew, I typed in...
"If I could go to a parallel dimension, it would definitely be the Lord Of The Rings, movie style"
"Woah, go sis" said Crystal, parading around my room.
We high-fived, then sat back down, closed all the Internet windows down, and continued to watch the movie. About five minutes into the end, we began to feel sleepy.
"Aww, I wanna see the ending" Crystal said inbetween yawning.
"I know, but we can see it tomorrow"
"Just a few more minutes"
I nodded, and we strained our eye's to focus on the screen, but it didn't work, my eyelids fluttered, and then everything went black.
