Written over a year ago for the 2015 Romione Secret Santa. I've realised I really need to start putting up here the stuff I post on tumblr. Expect more entries soon!
The yelling still echoed through the girls' corridors, embedded in the walls. Now, they were being joined by cries and periodic sobs.
Hermione watched from the doorway of the sixth year girls' bathroom as Lavender raced up the stairs, hiding her face and trying to cover her sobs. She sighed, realising that her dormitory would be out of bounds for the next few hours, if not for the rest of the night. But that, she supposed, was the price she had to pay for the fact that it was now over.
It was finally, finally, over.
She could hear it in her head, still fresh in her memory after being called out a few moments prior. "We're through!"
And all she could feel was an intense relief, a cooling, calming sensation throughout her whole body, as paradoxically a flicker of burning hope lit up inside her heart, making it race with anticipation.
Hermione peered around the doorframe, down the stairs where she knew Ron would be, probably still standing, waiting for the students in the common room to stop staring at him. Should she go see him? Or would he rather be alone?
Then she snorted. Yeah, I'm sure he's absolutely devastated now.
But he could still want to be alone, her logical mind reasoned. Just because he's been waiting for her to break up with him for months doesn't mean he suddenly wants you there.
Hermione sighed and leaned her head against the doorframe, staring ahead at the door towards her room, the one in which Lavender was undoubtedly currently crying in, leaning her head against Parvati's shoulder. She closed her eyes in an attempt to block out the image - she didn't want to think or feel anything, not least the guilt that she knew was irrational, but present nonetheless.
Well, either way, you have nowhere else to go, do you?
Hermione straightened up and took a step forward, out into the corridor. Not allowing another second for her brain to suddenly start whirring in motion, she quietly yet swiftly made her way down the stairs, her night slippers muffling her footsteps. It was only when she was but three measly steps away from the Gryffindor common room floor that suddenly courage evaded her.
He was there.
He was sitting on the couch in front of the fire, elbows resting on his knees as he stared into the flames. The fire illuminated his hair, making it brighter than it usually was. Hermione felt her heartbeat quicken its pace.
Finally, she swallowed her nerves and took a step forward into the common room. The few students still there all looked up when she entered. She knew that at any moment, they would turn back to each other to begin their gossiping. She tried to ignore them.
And so she found herself purposefully walking forward towards Ron. Noticing the quiet that had settled over the room, Ron looked up confusedly, immediately meeting Hermione's gaze as she paused a few steps away from him. His whole face appeared to light up, muscles releasing the tension that had been keeping them stiff. He took her in for a moment, and Hermione felt strangely rather self-conscious as she stood in front of him in her old jumper, baggy pyjama pants and worn slippers, hair unkempt and wild as always. But if he was judging her harshly in his mind, he was an awfully good actor, for his smile only appeared to grow as he watched her. Finally, he broke the silence: "Hey."
Hermione's toes curled as she wavered slightly. "Hi," she replied back softly. Unsure of what to do, she clasped her hands in front of her, wringing them nervously. When had she started feeling so unsure around Ron? He was Ron, he was her best friend, had been for six years, she knew him better than anyone else…
He was also finally single.
She wasn't sure what her mind and heart were expecting. Just because he was now single didn't mean anything - he'd had his chance to be with her before Lavender, and Hermione could still remember all too well what had happened then… but something had happened these last few months, since he'd been poisoned and become friends again. There was still a tension between them, but it was laced with an electric potential… a crackling energy in their jokes, in their touches (which had become far more frequent and not necessarily limited to moments when it was absolutely necessary). It was a different kind of tension, a lighter tension, however the knowledge that he was still with Lavender had weighed down on Hermione… but now… now he wasn't.
"You planning on moving?"
Hermione shook herself out of her thoughts, feeling a warmth in her cheeks. "Sorry, I just… I got lost in thought."
"I know," Ron said, grinning at her. "You tend to do that." Despite the innocent teasing of the statement, the smile on his face felt different - enough to ensure that Hermione was now definitely blushing. She hoped that the fire gave her a good excuse, or that Ron wouldn't notice. "So, what were you thinking about?"
"Oh, nothing," she quickly brushed aside. "How are you?"
"I'm alright," Ron answered with a shrug of his shoulder. "I've been better, but…"
There was a pause as Hermione struggled to think of something to say. "Did you… did you want me to go or…?"
"No!" he quickly exclaimed, sitting up a bit straighter, turning so that his hands rested on the back of the couch. "No, Hermione, I've just been through a break-up, I need comfort from my best friend!" Yet his playful eyes somehow seemed to take away from any sadness his words may have been trying to convey.
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Yes, I'm sure you're devastated," she said, with a small smile.
"Well, having someone dump you isn't exactly a fun thing, I'll have you know," Ron said with a prim voice, appearing to be mimicking Hermione. She pursed her lips together and looked away from him in an attempt to stop herself from laughing. "Now, are you going to stand there for the rest of the evening?"
Looking down, Hermione realised she was still in her spot, a few feet away from Ron. Glancing up at him shyly, she finally moved around the couch and sat down next to him, taking care to ensure she wasn't too close. She was so focused on their proximity that she couldn't help but notice that as Ron turned around to face the front again, he adjusted himself subtly so that they were a little closer than normal, a little closer than friends would normally sit. Again, Hermione found her heart beginning to quicken.
Finally, she felt that her cheeks had settled down enough that she could look him in the eye confidently. She turned to look at him only to find him already looking at her. She only allowed it to catch her off guard for a few seconds, before she straightened her head and persevered. "So, how are you feeling?"
Ron glanced away from her abruptly, back at the roaring fire. "Well, you know… not great."
And Hermione's heart froze mid-beat. She could feel every part of her body slow down, so achingly still. She knew she had to say something, but how could she when her vocal cords felt like a glacier had just trailed over them? "You…" and she wanted to kick herself, for how could her quivering voice betray her so? "You're disappointed?"
"Oh, bloody hell, no!" he exclaimed, scoffing it aside completely, and the light and warmth returned to Hermione, flooding her senses with glorious life once more. She almost wanted to cry with relief. "It's not that," Ron continued, his voice a little lower now. "I mean, you probably knew that I wanted her to end it, right?"
"From all your hopeful wishes and your constant asking me 'how do I get her to break it off', I'd supposed it, yes."
Ron grinned slightly as he continued to watch the fire. "Yeah, I mean… I'd rather she do it than me, but…" he looked up at Hermione, his face in his hands, which were resting on his knees, "I still feel awful, you know?"
Hermione simply watched on.
Ron sighed. "I didn't… I didn't want anyone to get hurt. And Lavender did get hurt… in the end."
"Someone always does, in these situations," Hermione gently reminded him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
Ron licked his lips and sighed again. "Seems a bit unfair, doesn't it? I mean… I really was a rubbish boyfriend, wasn't I?"
"Yes," Hermione immediately said. Even though she completely adored him, she had to admit that he was not the best boyfriend. "Yes, you were."
Though his remark had appeared to be with humour, he looked rather deflated at Hermione's response, as he turned to look back at the fire.
"But," Hermione continued, "I think she wasn't quite the right girlfriend for you. I think," and here she faltered, but it was a testament to her Gryffindor courage that she was able to continue, "I think that with the right girl… you would be much better."
The right corner of Ron's lip curled upwards as he turned to look at her almost… hopefully? He stared at her, eyes trailing over her face as though trying to navigate an unexplored terrain - but he'd known her for six years, better than anybody. Finally, he licked his lips - quickly, as though he himself was unaware he was doing it - took in a small but deep breath, and asked in a quiet voice, "Who's the right girl?"
Hermione's breath caught in her throat as she swallowed nervously, quickly breaking eye contact. What a coward. "I– Someone strong and assertive… someone who can challenge you–"
"To be a good boyfriend?"
"To be better," Hermione said, giving him a playful smile. "And not as a boyfriend, but as a person, which in turn would make you a better boyfriend. Lavender…" and here she paused, thinking about what had happened with Lavender, to Lavender… and how now it was in the past. "Lavender is perfectly nice–"
Ron snorted. "Says the girl who spent most of this year avoiding her or making snarky remarks to her."
"She is perfectly nice," Hermione continued, ignoring him, "but she was very… complacent. You and she… I think you were too complacent in the relationship. Same old routine, just…"
Ron watched her as she struggled, then finally added: "… just snogging, yeah?"
Hermione licked her lips and nodded at the ground uncomfortably, recalling painful memories from this year. "Yeah, pretty much. And, uh," she swallowed nervously again, and moved on. "You weren't ever… stimulated in other ways, mentally and emotionally. And that's what you need… you need a fire, a spark of some sort that challenges you… someone who makes you bring out the very best of yourself. Because she's worth it and she helps you realise that… that you're worth it."
She looked up from the floor to find Ron staring at her with an intensity she'd never seen before. The firelight seemed to be dancing in his eyes as he watched her, and she could feel her cheeks turning pink as she pulled her sleeves a little further down her hands. He, on the other hand, sat still and patiently, looking as calm as she'd ever seen him. She breathed through her mouth, trying to maintain the courage that kept her looking back at him.
It was Ron that finally broke the silence. "Hermione," he murmured quietly in a low but steady voice. He licked his lips again, swallowed, then took in a small but deep breath. "Am I allowed to ask out another girl so soon after ending things with Lavender?"
Her heart stopped for a brief second, then restarted as she let out a small laugh. "Considering that it ended just under an hour ago, I don't think so."
Ron grinned at her and sat up a little straighter. "Alright, then, let's say that I've found her. A girl that can challenge me and all that. How–" he breathed in and out again, watching her with an odd mixture of playful seriousness. "How long do I have to wait before I can do it?"
She couldn't help but smile at him, even as her heart now raced nervously. "I think… you need to wait long enough so that she knows you want her for her, and not as a… a way to continue the activities that Lavender has now deprived you of."
Ron quietly watched her, as she stared back at him, feeling extremely vulnerable and exposed. "What if…" he sighed, breaking eye contact with her as he turned back to the fire, running a hand through his too-long hair, "what if she knows, that that's not it, that I… that I…" he turned back to look at her, an almost frantic expression on his face, "you know?"
And Hermione wanted to cry at that moment. His eyes held an earnestness and honesty that made her want to fling herself forward into his arms. Instead, she shakily drew in a breath and nodded. "I know," she whispered. And Ron's face relaxed, a small, hopeful smile forming on his face. "But," she continued, half of her kicking herself for what she was about to say, as Ron's hopeful smile vanished, "even if she knows it in her heart… her head might need some time to catch up."
The hope returned to Ron's face, albeit cautiously, not as strongly as before. Finally, he broke into a grin. "Well, her head's always been quite quick and sharp."
Hermione smiled again and sighed, ducking her head shyly. "Then I suppose you won't have to wait very long."
And Ron's grin broadened. "So, soon?"
Hermione nodded at him, slowly but surely. "Soon."
