It had been 1,000 years since the legendary Hero of Time saved Hyrule from Ganon and his legions of evil. Since then, the world of Hyrule has changed in more ways then one. For example, the vast endless fields of Hyrule have been replaced with an asphalt jungle of broken-down streets, crumpled buildings and a crime-rate so high it kisses the heavens. Horses have been replaces with smooth-riding cars, swords with guns and knights with hard-boiled policemen who don't take no for an answer. The only thing that remains of the old Hyrule is the ancient ruins of the Temple of Time, which has been made into a national landmark it is a symbol of all that was once good in the world, a light within a sea of darkness and despair.
It is within this city, on the bad side of town in Kokiri Street, that a homicide detective, detective Linkin Parks, lives in a ruin-down apartment with his super-sexy homicide partner "Mindy." Mindy was the kind of woman in her mid 20s who was so sexy that whenever a man saw her, it made him think of... sex. With her long tan legs and firm breasts, anyone could tell right away that she was a class-A knock-out. Linkin was the most baddass ball-bustin brawler homicide cop in town. With a height of 6.2 and arms so strong that even Chuck Norris would bow down before his manliness.
The story begins one morning around 7AM. The phone rang loud like a woman screaming in a dark alleyway about to be mugged. Linkin, still half dazed from sleep, answered it.
"Hello?" The voice of Linkin's boss, Chief Ingo, blasted through the other end.
"Parks, You and Mindy put some clothes on and go down to the docks! Some poor girl turned up dead around 3 this morning."
Linkin hung up the phone and turned over to wake up Mindy.
"Hey, we got to go down to the docks. Hurry up and get dressed."
"Dammit, I hate going to the docks! There's nothing their but a bunch of wanna-be gangsters!" said Mindy as she put on a leather jacket over a white top, which was one size too small. "Hey, the boss said some girl was killed so we have to go down there." said Linkin as he put on a long dark-green trench coat with a matching 1940s gangster hat.
They walked downstairs and out of the apartment where they got into Linkin's Hot-Rod Lincoln, Trail-Blazer, Super-Charge, Turbo XD, Pump-Action-Pimp sex car… which he called Epona.
The docks were once a pure snow-white beach with clean pure water called the Great Bay, but now, it's a breading ground of drug dealers who get their drug supplies from over seas. Two gangs ran the docks, the Day-breakers and the Night-shakers. The Day-breakers started work at 6AM and mainly worked on organizing the drug supplies to all the main crime bosses throughout the city. The Night-shakers started at 8PM and worked on unloading the drugs. Nobody ever wanted to go down to the docks at night. The Night-shakers were some bad motha-fuckers who would kill anyone on sight if they weren't one of them.
Linkin parked the car near one of the loading docks and got out. Mindy was already opening up a bottle of beer and chugging it down like it was water.
"Damn Mindy, take it easy! I'm pissed too because I didn't get my morning coffee, but that's no reason to get wasted."
"I don't care I told you I HATE the docks." She said as she broke the empty bottle against a brick wall.
Linkin walked up to the standard yellow DO NOT CROSS tape that surrounded the body.
"What do ya say Mido?" asked Linkin as he crossed over the tape.
"I don't know…. but I don't like it" said Mido as he was smoking a cigarette.
"She was a pretty girl wasn't she." said Mindy as she joined the men.
"Yeah she was but not anymore. Some sick bastard took care of that." said Linkin as he was examining the body.
The girl was around 16. Blood covered most of her face as if someone had a field-day with a razor blade. "Mido, take the body into forensics and see what they can find out." said Linkin as he walked away from the body.
"Sure thing, but what are you going to do?"
Linkin and Mindy were already back at the car when Linkin turned around to answer. "I'm going to get a cup of coffee."
About 30 minuets later, Linkin and Mindy were sitting at a table in a beat-down coffee shop near Kokiri Street.
Linkin sipped the coffee slowly then quickly stopped because it burned him.
"What's wrong Linkin?" asked Mindy as she was eating her blueberry pancakes.
Linkin got up from the table and looked at her, "my coffee… it's too hot."
"What are you going to do about it Linkin?"
Linkin walked slowly toward the counter with his coffee mug still in his hand. The guy behind the counter looked at him with disgust.
"What the hell do you want you damn copper-pig!"
"My coffee… It's too hot… it burned me."
"So, what the hell are you going to do about it ya pig!"
Linkin grabbed the guy by the shirt collar and pulled him over the counter with one hand, the other one still holding the coffee. He then slammed him against the wall to daze him.
"The hell man!"
Linkin then quickly grabbed the guy's hair and pulled his head back. With his other hand, he poured the hot coffee onto the guys face.
"AAGGHHA DAMN MAN!"
After all the coffee was gone, Linkin broke the mug over the guys face then threw him to the ground.
He then walked back to his table and sat down "That's what." He said as he stole one of Mindy's pancakes and ate it.
Later that day, Linkin and Mindy returned to their ruin-down apartment. The phone was ringing as they entered.
"Hello?" said Linkin as he put his keys on the table.
"Linkin, It's me Mido. Forensics found some fingerprints off the body. They belong to some big-time high-school football player named Lineback."
"Is he from that high school on Lon Lon Street?" asked Linkin as he started to light a cigarette.
"Yeah man, school is still going on so he should be there."
"Ok, Mindy and I will take care of it." Linkin hung up the phone and exhaled a stream of smoke. The smoke surrounded him and clouded his senses like the mist of a thousand misty mornings. "Come on Mindy. We're going to that high school on Lon Lon Street. Mido found the guy that killed that girl."
Lon Lon Street was on the south-west side of town which was once a vast cow farm many years ago. Now, it was just another crime-infested spider-web of gangsters and wise-guys. Linkin parked the car next to the football stadium and got out. Football practice was already going on as he walked onto the field.
"Mindy, you go up into the bleachers and cover me just in case things get out of hand."
"Sure thing Linkin." Said Mindy as she walked toward the bleachers. She was looking like some kind of sex machine as the sunlight shined on her long, smooth tan legs as she walked up the bleachers. Linkin made his way to someone who he thought was the coach.
"Are you the coach of this team?" asked Linkin
"you're damn right! What do you want here."
"I work for the police… homicide." Linkin said as he showed him his badge.
"One of your players is suspected of the killing of a 16 year old girl down at the docks. He goes by the name of Lineback."
The coach turned to his team and shouted out "Lineback! Get your ass over here!"
A tall, steroid-using teenager walked toward Linkin and the coach.
"This guy has some questions for you. He works for the police so don't be a smart-ass!"
Linkin examined the kid. He was about 5.9 wearing a long over-coat.
"Where were you between 2 and 3AM this morning?" asked Linkin still examining the kid. He noticed the kid put a lot of weight on his right leg.
"I was at a party all night." Suddenly, one of the other teenagers spoke up.
"No you weren't man! You left with your girlfriend around 2 last night!"
Lineback started to sweat as he was put under pressure.
"Kid, we found a dead teenager girl at the docks this morning with your fingerprints all over her. It's obvious that you did it, but what I want to know is why?"
Lineback played it cool while he answered.
"Hey man, I'm Captain Lineback of the football team. I can do whatever the hell I want. That girl was slowing me down. I need a real woman to satisfy my needs.
"Ok that's all I needed to hear. You're under arrest." Said Linkin as he started to get out his handcuffs.
"Like hell I am!" said Lineback as he started to run across the field.
Linkin quickly pulled out his gun and shot him in the right leg. Lineback fell down hard on the ground as blood sprayed from his leg and stained the grass. Linkin was almost standing over the kid when suddenly, Lineback pulled out a gun from inside his coat.
"Stay back man! I'm not afraid to blow you're brains out!" Linkin stayed cool as he put his hands in the air.
"Look kid, I haven't had my coffee this morning, so the last thing I need is for someone's brains to be splattered all over my clothes. I don't know about you, but I hate going down to the laundry-mat."
"Just shut up man! I'm going to do it! I'm going to blow you're fucking brains out!"
Suddenly, a gun went off, and Linkin's pants were covered in small pieces of brain and skull tissue. Mindy walked toward Linkin with a gun in her hand.
"Damn Mindy. Now I've got to go to the laundry-mat" said Linkin as he and Mindy were walked back to the car.
"Sorry baby but he had a gun on you."
"It's ok, but first I'm going to try and get some good coffee again." Said Linkin as he drove out of the parking-lot.
"you're going to go to a coffee shop looking like that?"
Linkin smiled as he wiped away some of the skull tissue from his pants.
"If anyone asks, I'll just say that's what you get when you work in the asphalt jungle."
