Etcetera's April fool.
Electra had stayed the night at Etcetera's owners. It was a small but comfortable bungalow and the kittens had slept peacefully in a basket by the fire.
Etcetera stretched- irritated by the pounding as her owner Samantha ran down the hall. She let out a surprised squeal as Sammy lifted her out of the basket. Electra was glad it wasn't her as the blonde, curly haired girl tickled her friend behind the ears. "Guess what Beauty?" She said lifting Etcetera high into the air; the kitten gave a frightened meow. Electra tutted, some humans have no consideration. "We're getting a gorgeous little puppy dog." Etcertra hissed angrily and jumped out of the girl's arms making sure she gave her a scratch on the way. Sammy laughed at the kitten that was spitting on the carpet, "April fool!" she yelled throwing her arms up in the air and smiling like this was the most fun she'd had in weeks.
Electra looked at her friend's face mirroring the same confused expression as hers, she tapped her forehead significantly. The girl smiled and knelt down facing the kittens, "Today;" she said pointing at the calendar which bore the word 'April' under a picture of a stuck-up looking kitten with honey coloured fur. "Is April fools day." The kittens glanced at each other again, and then up at the calendar where the kitten smirked down at them. Sammy sighed and collapsed onto the sofa, "It's the only day of the year when you can play loads of tricks on anybody you want and not get in trouble for it!"
"Sam!" Came a yell from the front door, Samantha kissed Etcetera on the top of her head and hurried out of the house ready to go to school.
The two kittens faced each other, both looking equally excited. Etcetera giggled, "The only day of the year."
"Where we can play loads of tricks."
"On anyone we want."
"And not get in trouble for it!" Electra's excited voice reached a crescendo.
"To the junkyard!" Shouted Etcetera, pointing at the kitchen. Electra grabbed her friend by the shoulders and swivelled her around, so her out-stretched paw was pointing at the front door.
"Junkyard's that way E." The two kittens giggled and raced out of the cat-flap.
Etcetera and Electra didn't have long to wait until their first April fools opportunity. Munkustrap was lying beside the gate to the junkyard all unsuspecting when Etcetera ran up to him. "Munk." She panted trying to act as if she'd run along way. The silver tabby turned to face her. "It's… I've just seen…. Macavity!" She tried to let her face fill with fear, the way Demeter's did whenever the hidden paw was mentioned. Munk got to his feet, instantly alert. Etcetera tried to hide a smirk as the tabby looked wildly around as if expecting Macavity to drop from the sky. "Over there," Etcetera pointed a dramatically shaking paw out of the gate. "Behind the bins." On cue Electra banged two bin lids together the clanging sound reverberated around the junkyard and Munk took off out of the gate.
Electra could barely walk she was laughing so much, the two kittens burst into fits of giggles as Munk searched in vain through the bins. Etcetera lifted her paw into the air and Electra slapped it, "Good one!" She squealed as Munk looked back towards the junkyard. The two kittens quickly bounced of the pile of trash still trying not to laugh.
Etcetera turned to see Tugger sauntering towards them. Electra noticed him too, "Tugger next." She said striding towards him purposefully. Etcetera grabbed her tail.
"What are you, mad? We can't play a trick on Tugger, it would be like telling the stars that they'd lost their twinkle or pretending the sun was cold or-" Electra yawned hugely.
"Well I bet Bombalurina would have the guts to trick him. It would get his attention wouldn't it?"
Etcetera's attitude changed immediately, "Anything she can do I can do better!" She snorted.
"Then follow my lead." Said Electra and she went to meet Tugger, Etcetera following her uncertainly.
Tugger smiled down at the two kittens and opened his mouth to speak when Electra did a king-size double take. Etcetera simply turned away with a slight grimace.
"What's wrong have I become even more gorgeous over night?" Tugger continued to smile.
"It's not that T-Tugger," Electra stammered, "You're H-Hideous." Tugger gave a frantic yelp and put his paws up to his face.
"Why what's wrong? Is it spots? Boils? An ulcer?" He screwed up his face as though in pain, "It's not… wrinkles is it?" Electra worked to keep her face revolted,
"All of those things and more!" She heard Etcetera gasp quietly behind her and the other kitten peeked at Tugger.
The tom spotted her, "E what's wrong with my face?" He asked frantically, the kitten shook her head and let out a realistic sob, Electra was sure she really was crying. Bless. That was proof enough for Tugger he had already decided that the day Etcetera couldn't look at him would be a very bad day indeed and he ran off covering his face.
"I really didn't enjoy that." Mumbled Etcetera as her friend grinned.
"Don't be so boring." Electra stuck her tongue out. Then grabbed her friends paw quickly and tugged her away, she'd just seen a very disgruntled Munkustrap jump down from a pile of trash.
The two kittens stopped for breath behind a huge, high backed armchair. Victoria was practicing her dancing not far away. "Oh, I know lets tell Vick she's a terrible dancer." Etcetera clapped her paws eagerly. Electra shook her head,
"E, every member of this tribe tells her she is an amazing dancer daily, one comment from us is not going to change her opinion of herself." The two kittens sat in moody silence for a while,
"I wish my fur shined like hers. See the way the light catches it?" Muttered Electra, Etcetera suddenly jumped up.
"That's it! We'll tell her she's gone ginger."
They both laughed at the thought, it was perfect!
Victoria was in the middle of some complicated dance move when the two kittens approached. "Hay Vickster." Etcetera smiled widely. The white queen nodded but carried on with… whatever she was doing. Suddenly she stopped.
"Could you two tell me how my pirouette looks?" Electra nodded eagerly, and the white queen spun gracefully on one foot. Electra began to clap but Etcetera cleared her throat.
"It looked great but… Erm Vick have you been messing round with your owners hair dye?" Victoria shook her head.
"No, why?"
"Oh, well;" She took a deep breath, "There's a big ginger patch on your back!"
Victoria gasped in horror, luckily the sound drowned out Electra's giggles. The 'white' queen rushed into her den where she could be seen attempting to twist her neck round so she could see her back.
The kittens stuffed their paws in their mouths as they hurried away.
Munkustrap called a tribe meeting. He'd had Tugger and Victoria complaining to him about Etcetera and Electra and he wasn't too happy himself. Pretending Macavity had come back! What were they thinking? He asked his mate Demeter to fetch the kittens and she appeared, practically dragging them into the centre of the circle of cats. Apparently they had been in the middle of telling Mungojerrie that the police were searching for him.
Etcetera and Electra stood silently in the circle. Both thinking the same thing, they had only been having a bit of fun, where's the harm in that. Besides Samantha had told them they couldn't get into trouble for playing tricks on April fools day.
Tugger walked into the circle of cats, he was wearing a brown paper bag over his head with two eye holes cut out. He sat next to Victoria who was lying down with her back pressed firmly against the ground. "Tugger," Munk tried not to smile, "Why are you wearing a bag over your head?" The other tom sighed heavily.
"I'm hideous!"
Bombalurina laughed, "What? Have you only just realised?"
Tugger who was by now going through a very emotional time in his life whimpered and pulled the bag further down his neck. It ripped at the top so that a bit of his head fur was sticking up out of the hole.
Bombalurina cocked her head, "You now look like a mouldy potato."
Tugger pulled the bag of his head angrily. Munkustrap jumped back in surprise,
"Tugger, you're hideous." He gave a fake shuddered.
"You know," Tugger growled, "I'm so grateful for your brotherly love and affection."
Munk smiled, "It's my pleasure."
"I bet it is."
Victoria coughed loudly from the floor, "Can we get back to the matter in hand please?"
Electra gulped loudly and Etcetera patted her arm and this time her paw really was shaking. "Kittens," Began Munkustrap, "You have been tricking cats in this tribe all morning. You played a very serious trick which involved telling me that you had seen Macavity nearby."
"I think the trick they played on me was more serious!" Tugger snarled.
"That wasn't a trick that was the truth." Bombalurina smirked.
Munk cleared his throat, "Saying something like that was immature and potentially dangerous. We're not sure we want kittens who behave so irresponsibly in our tribe." Etcetera whimpered, she could hear Electra's heart pounding away.
"You don't mean…" she tried to speak but mid-sentence a lump formed in her throat.
"I have no choice but to banish you." Munk finished sombrely.
The other cats nodded in agreement. Electra looked wildly around, waiting for some one to plead their case. But no one spoke for them, no one cared.
The two kittens turned and began to walk towards the gate; the shining silver had never looked as gloomy as their paws thudded heavily towards it. Munk cleared his throat, the kittens turned and their eyes were shining with tears. "APRIL FOOL!" The whole tribe shouted. Laughing at the stunned expression on the kittens faces. Electra turned to her friend in disbelief,
"Did they just trick us?" Etcetera nodded smiling and the kittens ran back into the circle of cats. Skimble pulled a gold pocket watch from his waistcoat.
"It's just gone twelve. April fools is over!" A collective sigh of relief went through the tribe.
Etcetera pulled her friend close and whispered in her ear: "Until next year!"
I wrote this fic ages ago but i thought it would be better to release it on April fools day - one of my fave days of the year!!!
