Interpretations

She is first told the reason for her admittance to the Kuchiki clan by a servant, mere days after her formal adoption. The conversation is opened at seeming random over the flutter of sheets as they are shaken out: idle words pinned up as carelessly as a bit of laundry, casual and bland. "You look just like Hisana-sama," she tells Rukia, and Rukia's back stiffens at the knowing note of her voice. "Byakuya-sama's late wife. Everyone says that is why you are here."

The meaning of the words sinks into Rukia slowly, and her heart sinks in realization. Adopted for her looks, for her resemblance to a dead and much-beloved wife, she thinks she knows now what to expect. She knows something of how these nobles behave, and she is all too aware of the ways men cope with their grief.

She dismisses the maid with a listless nod, and once the door has hissed shut she draws her yukata tightly about herself. She should not be surprised. After all, everything worth having must be earned-- she'd heard that once, and her hard life had taught her the truth of it-- and she had thus far paid nothing for her entrance to this most prestigious of clans.

For weeks, she lies abed every night waiting for the whisper of the door, for near-soundless steps: for the heavy oppression of his spiritual signature, weighing down upon her chest. She waits, and he does not come.

He never comes to her bed-- never even gives her a look. And with time, she begins to catch herself thinking she might almost have preferred his attentions. They would at least have confirmed beyond a shadow of a doubt the true reason for her adoption, rather than left her to grasp futilely for answers in his silences and his turned back: left her to wonder why he avoids looking at her, if he adopted her for her face.

She wonders sometimes if it is some inadequacy of her form that keeps him from her-- some error in the way her little body joints together, a deviation in the length of her limbs or the slant of her hair. She is not exactly like Hisana-sama; perhaps that is why.

Far be it from her to complain that he does not come to her bed; but the lack of resolution hounds her heels. She tries so hard to earn her place in other ways, to make the decision to adopt her a good one. She tries to work away the debt she feels within her, the disappointment she feels herself to be. Her efforts draw no glances, no attention. No answers.

Months pass, but she remains convinced that replacing Hisana-sama shall be her eventual and ultimate purpose as a Kuchiki. There is no other discernable reason for her to be here, even if he continues to ignore her: likely still shrined in his grief. All her questions are replied in the same way: you were adopted for your resemblance to the Lady Kuchiki. You look so much like her, and he loved her so.

Years pass, and still he will not look at her; even as she looks at him and wonders-- with the clinical resignation of a prisoner examining the guillotine's edge-- what he would feel like, what he would taste like: what it would be like beneath him, that proud body brought low to mantle hers.