SHE WOLF
Fandom: Once Upon A Time
Pairings: Emma/Regina, Regina/OC
Rating: M
Warnings: Language, violence, sex between two women
Trigger Warnings: Mentions of abuse, rough sex, torture
Disclaimer: I do not own Once Upon A Time or it's characters. They belong to others. I make no profit from this. However, Eva is mine.
Summary: SPOILERS UP TO 2x09. GOES AU AFTER THAT. Includes an OC. A person from Regina's past shows up amidst the chaos, a voice of clarity among the cacophany of voices; she believes there is redemption for Regina, but only down a road Regina must first accept.
Author's Note: Normally, I dislike OCs in fanfic. Either reading about them or writing about them. But for some reason this idea struck me while I was at work, and I had to get it down. I do hope some of you out there find this at least marginally entertaining. Reviews -even critique!- are greatly appreciated... even if you're just taking five seconds to say 'yay' or 'nay.'
-
Ever since Emma and Snow had returned from the Enchanted Forest, Regina found herself in a difficult situation. Her nerves were jumping inside of her skin, muscles painfully contracting at the worst times, sleep and hunger eluding her, shivering attacks leaving her aching.
The dark magic she had taken in to close the portal was slowly eating her alive.
Without an outlet, it would eventually kill her; and not in a remotely humane way. The pain alone was becoming intolerable, driving her to drink until the room tilted and the pain took a backseat to her thoughts.
Perhaps this is what I deserve, ran through her head. To have done good -much too late- only to find myself still alone, still unloved, dying as my body tears itself apart with dark magic. Ironic...
The crisp chime of the doorbell shattered her line of thought and the silence of the mansion, the tumbler of whiskey paused only inches from her lips. Her eyebrows furrowed as she glanced at the clock on the mantle -just past two in the morning- and then worked up a slight scowl. No one should be at the door at this time of night; Henry should be in bed, well asleep... perhaps it was Leroy, come fresh from the bar, shit-faced and brimming with liquid courage. If that was the case, she preferred to ignore the offensive little man and continue her drinking in quiet solitude.
She'd been more and more like that lately... nonconfrontational. Before, she'd always been claws out, magic or venomous words at the ready; now she could barely muster up the energy for a witty come-back. There was just not enough rage left inside her to fuel those volatile emotions. Nowadays she was mostly tired, hollowed out by the loneliness and rejection that was the fallout of her curse being broken. Even her charged confrontations with Emma had simmered down to apologetic glances and soft-spoken words.
Another sip of whiskey burned it's way down her throat, and when she closed her eyes to revel in the feeling the doorbell chimed again.
If it had been Leroy, he would have started to knock and shout by now. Perhaps it was an emergency -but isn't that why she had a phone? And why would they come to her? Sighing, Regina set the glass down on the coffee table and stood up, smoothing the wrinkles from her immaculate gray dress. It was the same one she'd worn back when Emma had mutilated her beloved apple tree.
Whoever she had imagined it would be when she opened the heavy white door, it definitely was NOT who anyone she had expected.
"Eva?!" came tumbling out of her mouth before she could stop herself, surprise very clearly written on her face.
The woman standing in the light of her front porch looked like the definition of a rich biker chick: all high-end black leather with silver buckles; knee-high boots, tight pants, and a gorgeous jacket (definitely not tacky... unlike Emma's) zipped tight against the cold. Dark, choppy hair -a careful mix of style and chaos- grazed her shoulders and fell into eyes the colour of warm caramel.
She was pretty in a dark, rough sort of way. Her only obvious flaws were the sporadic, silvered scars that decorated her lightly-tanned skin. And when she spoke her voice was liquid velvet; comfortable and deep enough to fall into.
"Hello, Regina."
The former mayor gawked for an awkward moment, then seemed to remember herself. Quickly schooling herself back into a semblance of control, she guestured into the mansion as an invitation. Taking the hint, the woman stepped inside with the stocatto of heels and clicking metal. She glanced around, studying the inside as she followed Regina back to her study.
Ever the good host, she poured Eva a glass of whiskey as well and held it out to her, eyes darting around.
Eva gave the offered glass a glance before reaching out to take it, fingers brushing Regina's as the whiskey exchanged hands. Regina's shifty gaze flew to her eyes, searching painfully for her motive. The amused glitter in the woman's eyes made her blush and turn away.
"It's strange... how for nearly thirty years I've watched you be the mayor... so, put together and in control, a son to take care of, a city to run. Every day your make-up is flawless, outfits pristine." The stranger picked her way across the room to sit further away than even Emma ever had, as if physically showing how far apart they truly were. "And I couldn't help but wonder... how was this your happy ending?" Raising the glass to indicate the room, she shrugged. "I thought on it, rolled it around in my head for some time, and got to thinking. Is it the lack of magic? Surely, here, no one could hurt you -not your mother, not Rumple- and you would be able to quit your addiction. Or was it the fresh start? No one knew who you were, what you had done in the old world. Perhaps it was finally having a child... after everything you had endured... the miscarriages, the orphans rejecting you... Whatever your 'happy ending' entailed, it did not truly make you happy. Always apart, always alone. Even with Henry."
Taking the opportunity as Eva took a drink, Regina turned a watery glare on her. "How DARE you come here in the middle of the night to judge me! And where have YOU been all these years?!"
Golden eyes contemplative, the stranger swirled her drink. "In that form which most naturally comes to me."
"A wolf," it's a quiet revelation, and suddenly Regina feels ill.
Eva bobs her head in affirmation. "You cursed us to this place, you brought everyone with you that you wanted. No one knew who they truly were, so they were none the wiser; you gave me my wolf, though, and with it my memories... how was I going to tell anyone?"
Regina is staring into her drink, watching the amber liquid swirl and glint brightly in the crystal. With a sudden, jarring realization, she remembered Eva's fur was brilliant amber.
"For twenty-eight years I watched you; you never changed, you were always the same woman. All hurt and anger and regret and guilt, but now you could hide it under a mask. Pretend you were someone else. And then this... Emma Swan showed up." At Regina's flinch, she raised an eyebrow and continued. "She challenged you like no one before had, and even as she broke the curse on the town, she broke the curse on you."
"What?" The question was quiet, as much confusion as bewilderment.
"Not a curse of magic, but of your past. Since that woman showed up, you've changed, Regina. You are not the woman who cast this curse. She was a hurt child, born of an abusive mother, created by the loss of first love, twisted by an imp who offered that still sweet, still innocent girl freedom in untamed dark magic; and further and further that Regina drowned, losing more of herself each day. In the end, like a cornered and wounded animal, she lashed out in the only way she knew how.
"And while that woman is still a part of you, you are not her any more."
Regina remained quiet, wholefully out of character. Perhaps it was because this woman spoke the truth with jarring clarity, or maybe the past misdeeds being brought to light so frankly sobered her. Or it could have been their frustrating, tenuous relationship that had plagued the edges of her reign as queen.
After taking a moment to drain half her glass, Eva continued. "Now you are the woman who has shouldered a town for twenty eight years, adopted and nurtured a baby into an intelligent, well-mannered young boy as a single mother, and gave these people things they could have only previously dreamed of. If you had really wanted to hurt these people, you had many years to do it; indoor plumbing, central air conditioning, and video games aren't exactly torture."
Regina shifted uncomfortably, still staring into her whiskey because she couldn't look anywhere else. "And look where that got me. I've forever lost... Daniel," she choked on his name, "I swore off magic to gain back the son who hates me... and still refuses to give me the time of day, my mother -who I had thought dead- is coming to Storybrooke, and godammit if Emma Swan isn't treating me like a charity case."
Eva carefully watched the shifting emotions play across the other woman's face, analyzing each tremor in the woman's hands.
In the old world, she never would had gotten this far. The Queen's temper was legendary, and any critique or mention of 'things better left unsaid' would have had her chained up in the dungeon and left to rot. Close friend or not. That Regina had sat through her words, even contemplated them, was a marvelous improvement that only further validated her theories.
The trembling in her hands had worked it's way into the brunette's shoulders, and then into the tightly-drawn lines of her face. When tears appeared at the corners of her eyes, Eva was standing, tumbler forgotten on the table, and crossed the room to wrap her arms around the former evil queen/ex-mayor.
The brunette stiffened instinctively, ready to push Eva from her, but once her weight had settled next to her, making the couch dip, and warm, strong arms encircled her, she lost any composure she might have had. Tears spilled down her perfect cheeks, stiff posture and stoic expression giving way to grief. Althought she let Eva hold her, she couldn't find the strength to touch her back.
The Wolf smelled of leather and wood smoke, her soothing warmth radiating comfort in it's possessive protectiveness. It was heart-breakingly familiar; few people had ever touched her so kindly.
Nothing more was said as Regina cried herself past the point of tears to where only muffled sobs remained. After a minute -or tens of minutes, who could tell?- she collected herself, wiping her eyes with the back of a hand, and pulled out of the embrace.
"You smell of dark magic." It was a statement, brooking no argument, and at Regina's tearful nod, Eva pressed a palm to her cheek, drawing her gaze. "Regina, it's going to kill you to keep it bottled up like this."
"I know." She sounded so resigned, so broken.
Brows furrowed, the Wolf canted her head in confusion. "Then why haven't you gotten rid of it?"
Regina's dark chocolate eyes fell to her lap, and althought she didn't move, it was obvious she was withdrawing into herself as emotions shut down in her eyes, that tightness returned to her face, and her muscles readied themselves as if to flee. "I promised Henry I-"
"You wouldn't be using magic!" She interrupted the former queen with a fierce glare, "Draining the energy you pulled inside of yourself is not using it, Regina... you know better!"
"It's all I deserve," she heard the brunette whisper, so softly perhaps only a Wolf would have been able to hear it. A fresh tear traced down her cheek, and Eva brushed it away with her thumb.
"Bullshit, your majesty." There was a deep rumble to her voice, and when Regina looked up, she saw those caramel eyes had turned a brilliant yellow as the Wolf leapt to the forefront of Eva's consciousness.
"I... I can't-"
"Use me."
"What?"
Eva shifted forwards, taking Regina's shoulders. "Use me to drain the dark magic."
"I won't hurt anyone else." Her hand reached for the whiskey again.
"It's okay... what little you might hurt me... it'll be alright. You need to get it out."
Regina swallowed, made a visible effort to control her emotions, and when she started to speak Eva cut her off.
"You are a wonderful, strong woman, Regina Mills. But you are also damaged." At the stricken look she received, she offered a sad half-smile. "Thankfully, there is someone who can pick up the pieces. But you have to let yourself love again; and that means letting people help you."
Since Regina had already retreated, Eva found leaving easy. She stood with the creak of leather, polishing off the whiskey, then stooped to brush her lips chastely against the woman's temple in a display of support.
"Change is never easy, my highness, but know that when you are ready there are those of us willing to help."
Regina listened to Eva's retreating footsteps, the open and closing of the front door, and then the deafening silence that followed.
She needed another drink.
