Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and its characters.

It's been 5 years since the second Wizarding War has ended. 5 troublesome years of pain, anguish, and regrets. Most of the Wizarding World has slowly turned back to normal. Shops have reopened in Diagon Alley, Hogwarts has been repaired and has accepted more students than before, and the people are smiling once more. But that disgusting feeling of discontent still creeps within me up to this day. It leaves a bitter taste in my mouth that others were given the gift of happiness while I remain stuck in the past.

I still hear them you know, the anguished cries of the dying and the suffering. I still see the hopeless expressions of the dead as they lie on the floor, not ready to accept that it was their time. So many were gone too young and too early. If I was stronger, would I have saved them all in time? If I had destroyed the horcruxes sooner, would the damages be lessened? If my parents hadn't died, would I still be burdened with all that responsibility?

I don't know.

Maybe Professor Dumbledore knew. He always knew everything, even his death. I'm still angry at him. He left me at the most opportune time and left me the burden of saving millions of lives. He was a powerful wizard, he could've found a much more less traumatic way to end the war. But he had to go to the next great adventure, as he would say. Though truly, I miss him. He had his dislikable moments when he started preaching his 'for the greater good', but he was like a grandfather to me.

They said that with time, things will turn for the better. Mine had gone worse as the years have passed. Every night, I am plagued with nightmares so strong that I would end up unable to sleep for a few days. How could that be possible? Well fear is quite a strong motivator to avoid sleeping. I would spend those sleepless days in Sirius' room, looking at the mirror he gave me and pray that I would see his face again. It's a sad life I lead, one that I'm willing to disappear from.

Ron and Hermione were my only anchors to my sanity. They always had time to come and visit me in Grimmauld Place. Seeing them happy kept the depressing thoughts at bay and gave me a reason that all was not for naught. Our friendship never dwindled and it has become stronger than before. But at the same time, their feelings for one another grew.

They too walked a tough road but in the end they are where they wanted to be, with each other. It's been 2 years since they've gotten married. It was a happy day. I was happy for them. Now, they are awaiting their first born child, a girl. They wanted to name me her godfather, but I declined and reasoned that others should have the privilege of having that title. I was already Teddy's and I didn't want to have too much responsibility. Also, I doubt that I can become a good godfather at all. Both didn't understand, but they conceded in the end.

Recently though, with Hermione's busy work as Head of Magical Beasts and Ron's demanding Auror position, we haven't seen much of each other nor even had a decent chat. Also, with their baby close to arriving, they have their hands tied up. I can't fault them really. They have their own life and I have mine. Well, whatever life I have left. The lack of distraction has paved way for that hidden darkness to start creeping up my mind once more. The mind versus the heart. Yet I doubt my will can take another beating. I am so close to giving up and let myself drown in hate and self-pity. Why can't I let it go? Why can't I move on?

Here I am, staring at the fireplace of the Black's ancestral home with a glass of firewhisky on my hand. I've become immune to it I think, being my constant companion to those sleepless nights. I wonder if Ron, Hermione, or anyone for that matter, have noticed my decline to madness. I mean, I must've looked horrible with the huge eyebags and haggard face. Though I never really cared for my appearance in the first place, unlike Malfoy.

Well speaking of Malfoy, I'm looking at one right now. It seems that my elf, Dipsy, has allowed Mrs. Malfoy to enter my home. My gaze zeroed in on the guilt-ridden elf. He looked anxious as he stared down on the floor while wringing his hands. My guest broke the tension when she said, "Don't fault your elf for giving me passage to your home Mr. Potter. I invoked my right as a Black to enter without your say." Well that answers one question, now for the matter of her visit.

"It seems that this is of an urgent matter if you just barged in like this Mrs. Malfoy. Well then, please take a seat. Dipsy, if you could please prepare for us some tea and a light snack." I watched my elf give a squeak as I addressed her. He hurriedly bowed and acknowledged my order before he left. I then turned to my guest sitting in front of me. Her gaze strong and unwavering. She looked elegant with her dark blue robes and golden locks up in a bun, like a true lady. I felt a bit embarrassed with my slumped position so I slowly rearranged myself on the chair.

She didn't speak. She just kept on staring at me. It's making me quite uncomfortable so I cleared my throat and had a sip of my drink to help lessen the tension. Dipsy arrived a few seconds after and served us each a cup of tea and fresh baked scones. I've always loved his scones, but nothing beats Treacle Tarts for me. I thanked Dipsy while Mrs. Malfoy inclined her head as thanks towards him. He then popped away.

The awkward atmosphere returns and tingling sound of spoons and cups fill the air. I don't know what she wants or what her purpose is. This is quite unnerving.

I see her take a sip of her tea and gently place it back down on the table. She slowly takes a deep breath and addressed me. "Mr. Potter, it's been a long time since we've had the pleasure of speaking with one another. How have you been?" I am speechless to say the least. I was definitely not expecting that.

"Well...um..I am good Mrs. Malfoy. You?..I mean, how are you?"

Smiling softly at me, she replied that she was good. "I am sorry for intruding on you like this. I understand that it looks quite like an ambush of somekind but worry not, my agenda is not negative in nature. But I do come to you in a sense of urgenct, if you will."

Ugrnecy? What could be so urgent? My bad stiffened and my body tensed up when she said that. Is it another rebellion? Are Death Eaters on the rise again?

She must have sensed my inner turmoil for she hurriedly explained herself. "I do not come bearing any bad news Mr. Potter. It's is more of a request."

I look at her and seem to be convinced that it isn't anything troubling. "What is this request then Mrs. Malfoy that you had to force yourself here?" Her expression tightened at what I said. I am a bit pissed that she had the gall to approach me like this so why not make my feelings known.

"You remember my son don't you? Draco." Well who wouldn't. He made my life in Hogwarts much harder than should be. "Well he has married Astoria Greengrass a year ago and they are planning to start a family. But the dilemma here Mr. Potter is that, poor Astoria is not fit to bear him a child."

Even the prat has gotten married. "Congratulations are in order then Mrs. Malfoy. But then what has that got to do with me?" I can't help but feel dread in what she is about to say.

"Well Mr. Potter, I would like you to carry the next heir of the Malfoy family."

Bloody hell.