I watched episode 12 of RTTE, where Fishlegs gets all fanboy about Hiccup doing his "hand thing", and then this one-shot came out. I don't know anything anymore! :D
Over the last couple of years, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third had managed to train almost every kind of dragon known to man, turning even the wildest, most dangerous ones into obedient, loyal beasts. For this, the young Chief of the Hooligan Tribe has justly earned the title "The Dragon Conqueror", which made him sound like the most powerful man in the Archipelago, and rumor had it that he was invincible against any dragon who dared to defy him.
Only this night Hiccup did not feel so powerful nor invincible; he felt more like crawling into a dark corner with his head between his knees. That was because his only month-old son has been screaming non-stop for hours, depriving him and Astrid (and possibly all of Berk, considering the frightening volumes his tiny lungs were capable of) of their precious, already-rare sleep these days.
"Come on, little guy," Hiccup murmured and pressed his chin against his son's soft scalp, his arms already aching from holding him for so long. "Why don't you just tell your poor mommy and daddy what's bugging you, so we can all go to bed?"
The baby only screamed louder in response and thrashed in Hiccup's arms, face red and wet and twisted with whatever was making him so restless. Hiccup sighed and put him back in his cradle, not knowing what else to do.
"He can't just tell us what's bugging him, Hiccup," Astrid grunted wearily. Dark bags hung under her eyes. "Although it would make things a lot easier."
They fed him; they changed his diaper, twice; Astrid bounced him in her arms, then Hiccup bounced him in his arms, then Toothless bounced him in his front paws - but nothing seemed to help. It was as if the baby had every intention of ripping their eardrums off, or exhausting them to death - whichever comes first.
Yep, training misbehaved dragons was nothing compared to putting a human infant to sleep. Hiccup understood dragons perfectly; it was almost as if he could read their minds. However, he completely failed to understand what in Thor's name his son, his own flesh-and-blood, wanted from him at the moment.
"Maybe we should call your mother?" Astrid suggested, trying desperately to speak over the loud wails. "After all, she has a lot of experience with wild dragon hatchlings..."
"Oh come on, Astrid, he's not a wild dragon hatch - " Hiccup stopped mid-sentence, his eyes growing wide like he just had an epiphany. "Wait a second. I think I have an idea."
Hiccup took a deep breath, closed his eyes and turned his face away from the baby. Then, he stretched out a steady arm and reached for the small creature slowly, until his palm was resting on his tiny, wrinkled forehead.
The baby's cries stopped at once. He opened his green, watery eyes and stared at his father with great wonder, cooing softly. The sudden silence was almost deafening.
Hiccup grinned at Astrid, who look so stunned that he would have laughed if he had any energy left in him.
"Well, I guess what works for a Monstrous Nightmare - "
His victorious speech was interrupted by a terrible shriek. The baby thrashed again, jerked away from Hiccup's palm and started to scream his lungs out with renewed force.
Astrid's shoulders slumped forward as she walked to Hiccup, who buried his face in his hands and moaned in frustration. "...does not necessarily work for a stubborn Viking baby," she said with a tired smile and took his hands in hers. "Let's just keep the hand thing for dragons and dragons alone, shall we?"
Hiccup sighed. "Looks like we'll have to come up with another method to train our baby." He bent over the cradle and wrapped the precious, little mess in blankets in his arms. It was going to be a long night.
