I started getting the idea for this not long ago. I was starting to realize that I could make my characters do anything. That's when my thought started getting weirder and weirder. This is the offspring of my thoughts.

Also, whenever I release a new story, don't expect the first chapter to be too long. This is just to see if my readers like my ideas for stories.

I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form.

"Kyuubi speak"

'Kyuubi thought'

"Character speak"

'Character thought'

Chapter 1 : Whacked Out Wish

"Bored, bored, bored. I am so bored." Sang a young blonde haired child as he walked around the edge of the village. Naruto was taking a walk because he had nothing to do. He had become a genin almost a week ago and tomorrow he was getting placed on a team. Until that week was up though, he couldn't really do anything but visit Ichiraku's and even he couldn't do that 24/7 for an entire week. "I swear, if I get paired up with Sasuke on a genin team tomorrow, I will die!"

It was quickly becoming dark out and so Naruto started to walk back into the village. As he was walking however, it started raining. He was too deep into his thoughts before to notice. Soon the rain picked up so much that visibility was very poor. Naruto took off running hoping that he was running towards the village. What he didn't know was that he was running into the woods, away from the village.

Soon Naruto saw a building when he almost ran into it. He decided to take shelter here until it stopped raining. He knocked on the door but no one answered. Finally he decided that there was nobody here and he opened the door and went in.

He turned around and shut the door. He started to search for a light switch because it was barely visible in the house. He didn't find a switch but he did find a candle on a nearby table. Luckily for him there where some matches on the table. The first thing he noticed after he light the candle was that the entire place was covered in an enormous amount of dust.

'I don't think anyone lives here anymore. Or they really don't care about how they live.' He thought as he started to look around the house for a towel to dry himself off with. Finding none in the first couple of rooms he checked, he tried the next door. When he opened the door he saw a flight of stairs leading down.

Being naturally curious, he made his way down the stairs. Most of the stairs creaked as he stepped on them. Obviously this house was very old.

'I hope the house doesn't collapse on me while I'm in it. That would be really shitty.' At the bottom of the stairs he could just barely make out the room by candlelight. What he could see was a couple of boxes in the corners and a trunk sitting alone in the middle of the room.

Deciding to save the trunk for last he made his way over to the boxes. All he found in them were clothes and other junk. He made his way over to the trunk in the middle of the room and stood in front of it for a minute.

'This room feels weird. I swear, if a ghost comes out of this trunk I will freak the hell out. And if I make it out alive I am going to laugh in Kiba's face about how ghosts do exist.' He thought as he gently reached out and touched the trunk.

He put the candle on the floor and took hold of the lid with both hands. He slowly and cautiously lifted the lid. When the trunk was completely open all he saw was a what looked like a small, flat looking teapot at the bottom of the trunk.

He took it out and looked it over. He thought he could see some writing on the side but it was too obscured by dust. He started to wipe the pot on his sleeve when purple smoke started to pour from it.

All he could do was stare in abject horror as a figure emerged from the end of the smoke. It had no legs, all he could see was the smoke that was attached to its lower body. It has a muscular torso and a red sash around what he believed was its waist. It also had a large head and black hair tied back into a ponytail. Did I mention that it was FREAKIN blue.

"Holy shit, it's a ghost." Naruto started to run around in circles, shouting about the apocalypse and how he didn't want to be eaten.

"Calm down kid. I am the genie of the lamp. For freeing me you get one wish. We used to grant three but people found a way around the no wishing for more wishes rule by wishing for more genies instead. Assholes." The genie said.

Naruto started to calm down and moments later a smile came to his face as he realized that he would be granted a wish. "So I can wish for anything?" He asked.

"Well, you cant wish for more wishes, love, hate, or death. Other than that, knock yourself out. No really, knock yourself out. The longer you don't make a wish the longer I get to stay out of that cramped lamp." The genie drawled out.

Naruto started to think of all the things he could wish for. He could wish for money, but then again nobody sells him anything. He could wish to be the greatest ninja ever, but it wouldn't be because of his skill. And Sasuke would probably bitch about it. "Aw man. There is nothing to wish for. This is so boring…..Duh."

"Alright, I'm ready to make my wish. I wish that life wasn't boring anymore. I want excitement and action. I want the world to go crazy." He said without thinking about the consequences.

The genie got a wicked smile on his face. 'He wants the world to go crazy huh? I'll give him crazy'

"Your wish is my command" The genie snapped his fingers and had a smug look an his face. "Enjoy." And with that the genie dissolved into smoke and was sucked back into the lamp. Once the smoke was gone the lamp started to shake violently and then without warning it disappeared.

Naruto didn't feel any different. He started to walk around and looked all over the house but nothing had changed. He decided that the genie was a bastard and that he would just go to bed. He found the least dusty place on the floor upstairs and used hid jacket as a pillow.

X

X

Naruto woke up the next morning with the sun shining on his face from one of the windows. He sat up groggily and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. As he looked blearily out the window he came to a sudden conclusion.

"Shit, I have to get back to Konoha. If I don't hurry I wont get to eat at Ichirakus before I have to go to the academy. And I have to eat at Ichirakus." He hastily got up, dusted himself off, put on his jacket, and busted out the door. He closed the door behind him and started to listen.

He could faintly hear the sounds of the village in one direction so he took off. He made it back to the village in a couple of minutes and took off straight towards Ichirakus. As he was running through the streets however two men cut him off. They both wore long, green trench coats and had bowl cut hairdos. One was obviously an adult and the other looked not much older than him.

"Look Lee, this person has not seen our youth. Let us show him."

"Yes, Guy Sensei. He must see our youth."

And with that they quickly yanked open their trench coats in the middle of the street to reveal they wore nothing underneath. As Naruto's pained cries echoed throughout the village it was accompanied by twin cries of "YOUTH!!!"

And so the craziness begins.