CRACKFIC ALERT! I wanted to write a fic about Mikami because I was bored.

SAKUJOOOOH!

X

"Tie, check. Briefcase, check. Watch, check. Death Note, check. PDA..." As Mikami Teru was getting ready for work, mumbling to himself a checklist of what was needed, he stumbled upon a calamity of epic proportions. His PDA was missing from it's designated spot on his nightstand. His eyes widened in horror and he dropped his briefcase in his hand with a loud THUNK. Distraught, he ran around his apartment turning things over, pushing things away, and hurtling things across the room. "WHERE IS IT!?" He screeched lifting his nightstand over his head. Somewhere outside his apartment, a man known as Lester could only wonder what the man he was tailing was doing up there.

The five stages of grief:

Stage 1- Denial

"I didn't loose it, I just misplaced it! Yeah, or some seedy punk stole it from me on the way home yesterday!" Mikami mumbled while pacing, his black hair a bit messier than usual. I couldn't have lost it, I'm to organized to loose something so valuable to me!" He stopped pacing and smiled to himself for a brief moment, only to have his face twist in frustration a moment later.

"I'm going to kill whoever took my PDA!" He yelled, hitting his fist against the wall, causing bits of drywall to crumble off.

Stage 2- Anger

"I'm gonna go get a NEW and BETTER PDA and they better damn well GIVE it to me for FREE!" The crazed prosecutor bellowed, his cries loud enough for little children in the streets to look up only to have their parents shield their ears. He stomped down the stairs ignoring the complaints of the other residents, got in his car, and drove over to the electronics store. Stomping in, he slammed his palm against the counter causing the man behind it to jump. With the quietest voice he could muster he said. "Gimme a PDA, one of the new fancy ones, and be quick about it!"

Stage 3- Bargaining

"I'm sorry sir but we can't just give away items," the man on the other side sniffed.

Mikami's face fell, the anger gone.

"Aww c'mon please? I lost my old one and I really really need a new one. I'll give you anything!" he pleaded looking sad and dejected.

"I'll give you my glasses, o-or my wallet, or how about this note- wait you can't have that." he said feverishly pulling things out and placing them on the counter.

"I-I'm sorry sir but we can't just give away things, you have to pay for them." the cashier said nervously, slowly backing away.

"B-but I'll do ANYTHING, just don't make me PAY! I can't afford one right now," "which was a bit of a lie considering his job.

"NO sir! We can't give out things for free, do you know what would happen if I got caught giving away products?" he yelled, a bit of spit flying from his mouth.

Mikami's eyes began to water as he realized he would never get another PDA and began to slink of with his things in his arms.

Stage 4- Depression

Curled up in his bed, phone unplugged and door locked Mikami cried like a lost child in a crowd; totally ignoring the fact that he was supposed to be at work.

"I-I LOVED my PDA! W-Why did it h-have to L-LEAVE ME!" He wailed loudly.

People upstairs and downstairs were, as we say, not very supportive and banged against the ceiling and floor yelling at him to shut up. And then suddenly, a pillar of light appeared in the dark regions of his depressed mind slowly giving him hope and scaring away all of the dark sadness. He stopped sobbing and lifted his red eyes up to the heavens above as the sun broke through the clouds and illuminated his raven locks.

"Go, my son, and cry no more." said a voice in his head. (Mikami's insane what do you expect?)

"Yes Kami." he said smiling for the first time in a half hour.

Stage 5- Acceptance

Happily skipping down the street clad in a blue Hawaiian shirt with pink flowers, Mikami whistled gaily 'Having a wonderful Time' getting some odd stares from the bikers on the street. No more was he weighed down by a schedule, he was free to do whatever he pleased. Looking over onto the road he noticed some unhappy faces stuck in traffic. 'Why do I have to be the only happy one? I should share my freedom with all!' Thought the happy-go-lucky man. 'But what to do...' And suddenly it hit him like Kira walking up to him and slapping him on the face. He grinned devilishly and took a detour into an abandoned alleyway.

A middle aged man and his family of six sat in their minivan waiting for traffic to move so they could get to the dreaded Mcdonalds the man so dearly despised. Suddenly a man with long dark hair and glasses ran out in past of his car laughing hysterically, butt naked. His family stared for a bit at the the spot where the loonyonce was; it was dead silent. Then the man said,

"Kids, never discuss this again."

They all nodded in reply not moving their eyes. From that day forward they never went to Mcdonalds again because it only reminded them of the crazed streaker running in front of their car on a hot summers day.

An hour later

"And then you ran out into traffic naked!" laughed a badly dressed blond clinging to Mikami.

"Yup, I felt everyone should see freedom and happiness in it's prime!" Everyone in the bar began to roar with laughter at his statement, momentarily confusing Mikami.

He had narrowly avoided the cops after his public indecency and had made it to a bar ,where after a few minutes, he had become the big shot, everyone was leaning in listening to his stories.

"Another round for everyone on me!" he shouted causing cheers to erupt throughout the bar.

"So what happened next Mikakins?" purred the brunette on the opposite side of him.

"I'll tell you what happened later'" he whispered kissing her on the cheek, he was drunk. His glasses were smashed on the floor somewhere and his shirt was unbuttoned a little revealing a bit of his chest.

"A toast to Mikami!" shouted a burly man in a bandanna. The entire bar shook once again with cheers and everyone drank to their favorite insane, Kira obsessed prosecutor.

The Next Day...

"Uuugh...what happened...?" Mikami sat up in his bed momentarily confused. He looked at his surroundings then spotted a sleeping brown haired girl next to him and remembered the events of yesterday. His mouth taster terrible, he was sore, and he had a splitting headache but he was overall happy. He got up carefully trying not to disturb the girl and reached for a pair of boxers and pants in his drawer. As he reminisced his freedom from schedules he felt something small and heavy in his back pocket. Confused he reached into his pocked and pulled out his missing PDA.

What do you think? I had fun writing this! Reviews would be very much appreciated!