1. Attire for the Boudoir
Jane Rizzoli was a tough woman. Her career called for it. Her personality demanded it. She preferred to remain in control of every aspect of her life, and usually the people in it as well. Ever since she was a little girl in school, she hated being told what to do and she always made a point to make her own decisions in her professional life as well as her personal life.
Jane was a proud, confident woman who took orders from no one. Unfortunately, there was one exception to the immovable personal strength that governed her life: Maura Isles, her greatest weakness. Maura had a certain way of making Jane do anything that she wanted and was the only person that was able to force Jane to abandon her badass attitude.
All Maura had to do was execute a slight head tilt, narrow her eyes and she would instantly get her way. Or pout. That pout was irresistible. Jane always wondered how and why she let someone get away with bossing her around so successfully. It didn't matter if it was something as simple as wearing high heels, or something as significant as how to treat her brother's baby mama, Jane would always find her strong will dissolve under Maura's influence. Her stubborn mind would be set, but next thing she knew, she'd be bending to do whatever Maura wished. Every time she got into a situation like this, she would resolutely think, "Okay. This time, sure. But next time? I will not give in. Never again." However, when the time came again for Maura to convince her to do something that she didn't want to do, her resolve never lasted more than a few minutes. It was completely ridiculous, but something she had grown accustomed to over the years.
At first, Jane was perplexed by her own change in behavior around Maura. She tried forever to pinpoint the reason Maura could control her so effortlessly. For years, she conjured up thousands of desperate explanations, but eventually, she was forced to admit to herself that she cherished Maura's presence in her life as more than just a friend. Over the years, and after everything that they had been through together, Jane was dismayed to discover that she had fallen in love with Maura. She had fallen in love with every adorable quirk. She had fallen in love with her incomparable compassion. She had even fallen in love with every flaw. Prior to meeting Maura, Jane had never even remotely considered pursuing a relationship with a woman. The idea of being with a woman was still extremely unexpected and terrifying, but she found that she constantly longed to experience the softness of Maura's skin. She longed to smell her elegant hair. She longed to kiss her perfect nose and to taste her alluring lips. She wanted to be the one to hold her at night. She was confused, but she knew one thing for sure: she wanted Maura Isles desperately.
Jane could chase down any homicidal maniac without a second thought, but telling Maura how she truly felt about her was the most frightening thing she could imagine. She just couldn't do it. Not yet. For now, she settled for spending as much time as she could with her and not bothering to hide her distaste whenever a new man waltzed into Maura's life.
Sometimes, Jane thought Maura might feel the same way about her, but as brave as she was in every other aspect in her life, she knew she would never be courageous enough to make the first move. She drove herself crazy attempting to interpret every move Maura made; searching for any indication that Maura loved her back.
This power Maura wielded over her annoyed Jane to no end, but it was a cycle she knew she would never be able to break. Today was their day off, and Maura insisted that they spend it shopping together. After the usual routine-Jane whining, Maura pleading and eventually getting her way-they set off to Newbury Street for a day of shopping. And to make matters more objectionable for Jane, Maura had also convinced Jane to let her drive.
"I hate it when you drag me out here," Jane grumbled from the passenger's seat as they drove down the road.
Maura, who was not one bit bothered by Jane's whining, smiled and said, "You always complain when I take you shopping, but you always end up enjoying yourself."
"I hate shopping." Jane continued to moan. She looked at Maura out of the corner of her eye and, seeing that her griping wasn't being heeded, heaved a sigh and added, "I suppose I do enjoy the company though."
Maura turned to her and beamed, a sight that always made Jane's day. "See? You love it." she chuckled flirtatiously.
Jane simply smiled and shook her head in amazement. Still set on being a party pooper, Jane eyed the woman sitting next to her, noting her fancy shoes and designer dress. "Don't you have enough clothes, anyway?"
"Oh… Jane," Maura lectured with mock seriousness, "One can never have enough clothes." She added a wink and laughed lightly. Jane's stomach fluttered at the mere sound of Maura's laugh.
They exited Maura's car and began walking down the street, occasionally pausing to view something, but mainly window shopping and sharing pleasant conversation. While they were chatting, Jane thought to herself how beautiful Maura was today. Her soft blonde curls fluttered around her face in the light breeze as her features lit up with laughter at Jane's jokes.
Maura grasped Jane's forearm suddenly. "Oh, let's go in here." she said as they passed a store called Agent Provocateur. The display in the front window featured three lady-mannequins sporting nothing but provocative undergarments.
Jane made a face and muttered, "Ugh!" as she reluctantly trailed after her friend, who had already entered the building.
Maura turned back to her dissatisfied shopping partner and whispered, "I want something new for the boudoir. I have a date tomorrow; with that nice man I met at the Café? Remember?" She grinned excitedly.
"Oh, yes." Jane muttered dejectedly. She rolled her eyes.
Maura stopped walking. "What? You didn't like him?" she asked, obviously sincerely concerned over Jane's opinion.
Jane clicked her tongue and answered, "You mean the doofus who kept laughing at his own jokes?" She wrinkled her nose. "Um. No. Not really."
"He did not!" Maura defended. Receiving an incredulous look from Jane, she continued, "So what? I thought he was cute. Besides, it's been a little while since I've… entertained." When Jane remained silent, she leaned in and unnecessarily added, "I mean sexually."
"I know what you meant!" Jane growled irritably while childishly thrusting her fists down by her hips.
Maura flashed her an innocent smile and began to search through racks of intimate apparel. Jane, still teeming with jealously, absent-mindedly followed after her, ignoring the merchandise. Jane preferred a more sporty type of undergarment rather than the extravagant lacey ones that were found here.
Maura was either completely unaware of Jane's hatred of her dates, or she was extremely good at teasing her; Jane could never tell. "You know," Maura said casually, "I'm sure Michael has a friend for you." She removed a lacy, see-through slip from a rack and held it up against Jane's body. "Should I ask him?"
Jane frowned and batted the hanger away crossly. "No, Maura."
Maura tilted her head reproachfully and hung the skimpy article of clothing back up. "Jane, you haven't had sex in months, even longer than it's been for me. Do I have to explain the benefits again?"
"Um…A: I really don't think that's any of your… business." Jane muttered, "and B: You've only told me like billion times about the stupid endorphins and oxycotton."
"Oxytocin." Maura quickly corrected, hiding a smile at Jane's purposeful mistake.
"Whatever." Jane dismissed.
"I'm just saying. Your mood could be at a greatly elevated level if-"
"Drop it, Maura." Jane interrupted darkly. She was in no mood to continue this topic of conversation.
Maura complied, giving little shrug and continuing to shop. "Alright, then help me find something sexy."
Jane's frown deepened and she wished they were in any other store doing anything else. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, but Maura didn't seem to notice.
They spent the next ten minutes searching through the multitudes of merchandise—or rather, Maura searched while Jane grudgingly followed. Every once in a while Maura would force Jane to provide her opinion on something she found, and each time she mumbled a dismissive, "Yeah, that one's fine," while never really looking closely at the lingerie Maura was holding up to herself.
Jane tried not to glance around the store at the mannequins, given that her imagination kept involuntarily wandering and trying to envision what Maura would look like in the various outfits. Each time this happened, she literally had to shake her head to rid her mind of the images it was conjuring up.
I wonder what she'd look like in that lacey thing… No! Stop it! Then a few minutes later, I bet she'd look so hot in that… Quit it! She made it a few more minutes until the thoughts came crawling back. Good lord, she would kill me in that… Holy shit! Stop! Then, once she finally convinced her disobedient brain to refrain from picturing Maura in the lingerie, she began to imagine what she'd look like without the lingerie.
"God dammit!" she cursed with another shake of her head, this time out loud.
Maura looked at her with deep concern and asked, "What's wrong, Jane?"
Jane paused for a moment, then flatly said, "Nothing. I'm fine."
Not convinced, Maura placed a caring hand on her lower back and inquired, "Are you sure?" The physical contact sent shivers down Jane's spine and her heart was melted by the expression of pure compassion on Maura's face.
"No... I mean, yes I'm fine. I think maybe I need some air. Do you mind?" she motioned outside with both thumbs.
"Oh. Of course not," Maura murmured, still looking worried. She carefully slid her hand off of Jane's back as the other woman turned to leave the building. Jane felt Maura's eyes follow her as she briskly walked out of the store and into the crisp fall air. She felt guilty for abandoning her friend, but she desperately needed to get a hold of herself, and getting some distance was the only way that she could see that happening. She paced on the sidewalk for a few moments before leaning her back against the wall and rubbing her forehead with aggravation. She laughed aloud at her own stupidity, wondering how it was possible to be so happy and so miserable at the same time. Her hopeless attraction to Maura was worsening by the day.
After a few minutes, she felt her phone vibrate and glanced at the screen, finding a text from Maura reading, "I believe I require your assistance." Jane sighed, propelled herself off the wall, and strode back into the store. She glanced around, looking for Maura but not seeing her anywhere. As she passed the fitting area one of the curtains shifted as Maura's head poked out.
"Hey, come in here and help me." Maura whispered and motioned with the hand that wasn't holding the curtain.
"Um… With what exactly?" Jane wondered cautiously.
"My zipper is caught." Maura explained. When Jane remained rooted in the same spot, she impatiently added, "Come on!"
Jane looked around before ducking behind the fabric to join her friend in the tiny enclosure. Without delay, Maura turned her back to Jane, revealing a wide-open dress opening and waited expectantly for her to assist her. Jane ran her eyes over Maura's exposed skin before awkwardly closing the distance between them.
"I adore this dress, but the zipper is getting really worn out."
"I honestly don't think I've ever seen you wear this one." Jane admitted. The back of her hand gently brushed silky skin as she reached inside the dress to disentangle the fabric from the teeth of the zipper. She was actively trying to keep her distance, but the zipper was far too stubborn and she shifted her body directly against Maura's to obtain a better angle. Her mind began racing due to their close proximity and she was starting to doubt her own self-control. Her face was almost touching the back of Maura's hair, and she inhaled a sweet aroma. Her hand slipped and her finger was pinched painfully, causing frustration with the little metal zipper to momentarily eclipse the sexual tension she was feeling. "God, it's really stuck. How the hell did you do this?"
Maura, who was patiently standing still, replied, "I have no idea. I was just trying to put my clothes back on…"
Jane pulled as hard as she could on the little piece of metal "It's… stuck." She let go of it and massaged her sore fingers.
"Darn it," sighed Maura. "Here." She suddenly moved her hands to the dress straps and slid them off her shoulders. The dress dropped to the floor, leaving her standing in front of an alarmed Jane with only a bra and panties. She deftly stepped out of the dress and bent down to scoop it up, unintentionally brushing her ass against Jane's leg. Jane's breath caught in her throat as she uncontrollably took in the view that was presented before her.
Maura, oblivious to Jane's temporary paralysis, turned to face her while working hard at the problematic zipper. Jane's eyes dropped to her chest, accentuated by a black push-up bra. Maura had never been very modest, and she didn't think twice about being almost naked in front of her best friend. Jane swallowed hard, silently cursing this situation she found herself trapped in. They were still standing inches away from each other. Maura continued working diligently at her task, too busy to notice that Jane was staring at her.
Jane noticed that the pace of her breathing had quickened and she gazed at Maura's face, scrunched with concentration. Her heart overflowed with adoration. She couldn't take her eyes off of the other woman, and was rudely jolted out of her trance when Maura growled in frustration.
"I can't. Here," she shoved the dress into Jane's hands. "You try again." As the dress was being passed between them, Jane felt the warmth of Maura's soft hands against her own. Forcing her focus on the dress again, she yanked at the fabric roughly until the zipper popped free of it's entanglement.
"Tada!" she sang as she presented the garment back to its owner. Maura took it and cheered, bouncing on her toes with excitement. Jane made sure to keep her eyes averted and began stepping out of the small changing area muttering, "Okie dokie, see you… uh, out there."
"No, wait!" Maura chirped while pulling her dress up her body, "You can help me decide. Ope-first…" she turned her back and gestured to Jane with a playful smile, "Zip me up." She pulled her hair away from her neck and out of the way.
Jane hesitated and started to protest before sighing and smoothly zipping the back of the dress closed. Her hand lingered at the base of Maura's neck. Her heartbeat quickened and she was afraid that the mixture of Maura's aroma, her soft skin, and the unbearably close proximity would cause her instincts and desires to win out over her self-restraint. She lightly touched the back of Maura's neck and gently grazed her skin with her remained still and silent, feeling Jane's body inch close behind her. Slowly, she turned to face Jane, and whispered, "Thank you." They were now face to face and Jane was not sure if she would be able to resist kissing her this time. Maura's eyes moved from Jane's lips to her eyes and gazed into them with a mixture of curiosity and indecision. Jane looked down at the considerably shorter woman and bit one side of her lower lip in apprehension. In her imagination, she was inching slightly closer to Maura by the second. Wait. No, that wasn't her imagination; it was real. Her eyes darted to Maura's throat, watching it tighten as Maura swallowed. Maura looked puzzled. She was probably wondering why Jane hadn't said anything yet. Her lips parted and she cocked her head to the side faintly in a silent question.
Jane cleared her throat with embarrassment and broke their eye contact, looking down at the floor between them. "Uh… which ones did you need help… choosing between?"
"Oh. Um. Right." Maura faltered. She tucked her hair behind her ears and looked around the tiny room in disoriented manner. "Yes, here we go." Regaining her composure, she grabbed two different hangers with evocative bedroom attire.
As Maura held up the different options she was debating between, Jane was tremendously thankful that she hadn't asked her to help her choose what lingerie to buy by modeling them. She was very out of sorts, and her hands were imperceptibly shaking.
"I guess… I guess that one," Jane said, pointing to an elegant lacey slip. It was beautiful, and she knew Maura would look incredible in it, but her stomach dropped when she enviously recalled who was going to be seeing her in it.
"Great!" Maura cheered, and gathered her things to exit the dressing area. She waltzed out to the checkout to purchase her items, blissfully unaware of the tension that she had just caused for her friend.
"Thank you, Jane." Maura said as they walked towards the exit.
"Buy me a beer and we're even." Jane replied with a chuckle, still slightly in shock after that peculiar encounter they had shared.
Maura gave her an extremely unreadable look and stopped before exiting the store. Jane stopped too and looked puzzled. "What?" she asked.
Maura tilted her head pensively, maintaining eye contact and looking deep in thought. Finally, she murmured "I… I don't know. You're just… " She paused to ponder what she wanted to say and exhaled. "I am just really happy that I have you."
Jane's stomach lurched with nervous delight and she felt her eyes light up as the corners of her mouth rose as well. Maura smiled so sweetly at her that she thought her heart might burst. Then, Maura seemed to shake herself out of her stupor and let out a slight giggle as she turned to leave.
"Okay, I am very happy with that purchase." Maura told Jane merrily, obviously unaffected by whatever had just happened between them. She innocently smiled at Jane. "I'm so excited for my date! Yippee!" she sang gleefully as she skipped out the door.
Jane's heart sank. She pouted and dragged her feet after her, sardonically grumbling, "Yippee…"
