Chapter One:
Pat, pat, pat, pat, crunch, pat, crunch. Victoria listened to the beat of her sneakers on the trail. It was usually so calming for her, but today, it just seemed like a countdown. Another notice had come in the mail. She was too far behind in her bills, and they were threatening to cut off her utilities. She pushed the thought out of her mind by picking up the pace and focusing on the burn in her thighs and the growing pain in her side. As she approached the final turn in the path, she briefly considered turning right, back onto the trail. Maybe she could outrun her problems just a little longer. In the end, she turned left, to the parking lot where her car waited. The sight of the dented Chevy depressed her. It was older than she was, and she often thought she could run faster than it could. It was falling apart and fixing it would be more expensive than replacing it, but it was just another item on a long list of things she could not afford. She looked through the windows into the backseat as she reached her door.
Why did I watch that movie? She asked herself once again, rolling her eyes but knowing that she'd still check the back for an intruder the next time. She opened the unlocked door, sat down, and took a long pull of the water bottle she had left in the passenger seat. The cool Washington air and shade of the tall evergreens that gave the state its nickname kept it from getting too hot while she ran. She pulled the keys from the glove box and started home.
As she entered her small apartment, she purposely avoided looking at the envelopes on the counter. She locked the door, and went straight to the bathroom. As she stood under the spray of the shower, she realized that she enjoyed this part of her run nearly as much as she did the run itself. The run was about getting away from life. Once it had caught her, the shower helped to wash it away. The sweat and grime, both figurative and literal, was flushed from her skin and flowed down the drain. She reached for the shampoo, but when it gave a hollow sputter, she just stared at the bottle. Suddenly, the safety and comfort of the shower were ripped away, and in its place was the glaring reality of her situation. The wave of depression hit her like a physical force and she all but collapsed against the wall of her shower, sliding down until she was curled up in the corner, the water still beating down on her, mixing with the tears now freely flowing down her cheeks. Her memories joined in the assault, with images of her car and the pink envelopes on the counter mixing with those of her demanding boss and abusive father. The image that stayed longest was that of a wreath and a large picture of her mother when she was young and beautiful. Mama, I miss you, she thought.
The water was cold, her joints were stiff, and her skin had started to stick to the wall of the shower when she opened her eyes again. She shuddered and staggered to her feet, shutting off the shower. She pulled the towel around her as she stepped out of the shower and checked the alarm clock in her bedroom as she put a big purple Huskies sweatshirt on over some sweat pants. Ugh, I must have been out for at least an hour. Her stomach growled, but she had no energy to try cooking anything, so she simply put a bowl of Ramen noodles in the microwave. She still avoided the envelopes. The breakdown in the shower may have released some of the excess stress, but she wasn't ready to face it again. She sat down to eat her noodles while she read a used textbook for a future class, but she could not focus. She thought about where she had grown up, a smallish town in northern Texas, and wondered if she made the right choice to leave. Of course it was. There is nothing left there for me. Not since Mom… She shook her head to clear the thought away. She quickly finished her dinner and went to bed, setting her alarm early to go for another run before work.
