Yo! I haven't written much in awhile, but I was bored and this idea was just there, so I took it and worked with it.

WARNINGS:

-NaruSasu (Please, if you don't like it, find something else to occupy your time)

-Slight AU (Due to the fact it appears as if Sasuke never left)

-Jealous!Sasuke (And Girly!Sasuke)

-Teasing!Naruto

-The word "Idiot" mentioned in abundance

--

Idiots

Sasuke did not like Jiraya.

He couldn't recall ever liking Jiraya.

He was perverted to an insane fault, he was annoying, he was an idiot, he never got Naruto to shut up, he always flaked on work, he always looked at women's breasts (Sakura's too, even though there was little to look at), he constantly teased Naruto about Sasuke and how he could have gone just as easily for a girl, he steals Naruto away all the time, and Naruto loves Jiraya like a father (or at least an uncle) thus making Sasuke feel unimportant.

Sasuke thought Jiraya was an idiot.

He also thought Naruto was an idiot, but the difference was Naruto was his idiot, so he let it slide. ... Well, it seemed like Naruto was his idiot. But maybe he was Jiraya's idiot. After all, they made the perfect idiot brigade.

Sasuke got frustrated at this point in his thoughts.

'Hell!' He thought bitterly, 'All they need is Kakashi and they've got the goddamn Three Stupid Musketeers!'

Sasuke wasn't stupid, he knew that, so he was slightly less tolerant of Naruto's behavior that Jiraya was. Maybe that's why Naruto liked him so much.

As this settled over Sasuke's head, he realized that maybe Naruto needed someone more like him. After all, Sasuke was just a bastard. He wasn't really nice. He couldn't recall being that giving either. Jiraya lets Naruto read his stupid books, and (though it's after a lot of complaining) he trains Naruto well.

"Oi! Bastard! I've been trying to get your attention for for-ever!" Sasuke looked at Naruto blankly as the tan hand waving in front of his face was brought to his attention. He also took in the sounds of the village as he realized he was looking at the wall of the ramen shop.

Sasuke really shouldn't think so much or so hard, since it was rather dangerous, and it usually depressed him.

"You're both idiots." Sasuke stated blandly.

"...Ehh?" Naruto looked confused.

"You and Jiraya." Sasuke supplied.

"What? What brought this up? You weren't even talking to me throughout lunch. You didn't even call me an idiot! Were you trying to think of something original, but couldn't come up with anything, so you just settled for idiot? What brought Jiraya up? After all, he's not even he-"

Sasuke covered Naruto's mouth with his hand and sighed.

"If I let go, will you shut up?"

Naruto nodded and Sasuke dropped his hand from his mouth and got up from his stool and started walking away.

Naruto followed, frowning.

"You're not going to elaborate?"

Sasuke debated if he should or not.

And then decided he would.

"You and Jiraya are both idiots because you just are. You both relate to each other so well. You laugh and joke and you're stupid with one another so you're having fun."

"So? What's the big deal?"

Sasuke hissed out through his teeth. He was not good at keeping his temper when he was feeling... depressed.

"The big deal is I can't do that for you. I can't laugh and joke and be stupid with you. I don't do that. I just... sit there and basically pay for food. I'm an asshole and I just can't do what Jiraya does. I can't be that perverted about female bodyparts and I can't... I just can't be like him."

Naruto stopped walking and Sasuke stopped soon after when he realized Naruto was not following. Sasuke turned around to face the blonde who was staring at him curiously.

Naruto knew Sasuke was jealous.

And Naruto laughed.

Sasuke blushed and looked away, his jealousy of Jiraya giving way to his anger at Naruto's laughter.

"How dare you? What's so funny? You think my confiding into you, which I don't do, is funny? Do you find it amusing of my feminine qualities? Jiraya seems to find it funny whenever you hug me or something, because it's sentimental. Well, that's why you two are so alike! You find it funny when I'm serious! Goddammit, Naruto!"

Naruto finished his chuckling shortly after and Sasuke had already started walking away. Naruto jogged to catch up with him.

"I'm sorry!"

Sasuke snorted, noticing Naruto had to apologize a lot (though it could very well be his fault, as he was quick to anger).

"I really am, Sasuke. I'm sorry that you think I don't find you funny except when you're serious. I'm sorry that you think Jiraya and I are such idiots." Naruto started jogging backwards so he could face Sasuke, now that he was in front of him. "I'm sorry you feel left out."

"Tch." Sasuke looked at the ground.

"I really do love you Sasuke. I like being with you. I don't need someone like me to be happy. You're my opposite! I love you lots!" The childish way he phrased the last part got Sasuke to look up and his features softened.

Naruto grinned but suddenly started to fall backwards. When jogging backwards Naruto had an even worse sense of balance than normal. The blonde grabbed Sasuke's arm and Sasuke, too, was falling.

He landed neatly on top of Naruto, who eagerly took advantage of the situation by putting his hand behind Sasuke's neck and kissing him lovingly (and beautifully).

"Get a room, brat." Jiraya shouted from the rooftop above them.

Sasuke blushed and the publicity of their kissing and pulled back scowling. Naruto laughed, looking at Sasuke sheepishly.

"You're both such idiots!"

(But this time, he was more okay with it.)