Just a one shot of an idea that has been spinning around in my brain. I hope you laugh!

"Alistair, I have a question." Zevran sat lazily in a chair near the fireplace in the king's study. They were enjoying a quiet evening, the day having been filled with boring court business.

"What is it, Zev?" Alistair sat at his desk, reading some documents he was expected to know for the following day's business.

"It occurred to me that you and I are more similar than you would think."

"Oh, in what way?"

"Well, I was thinking about your parentage. You and I both were raised without our parents, yes?" Alistair grunted in assent. "From what we have learned about your parentage, whereas you had believed your mother to be a servant, it turns out she was a warden, yes? But more importantly, she was an elf. Now, my mother was an elf as well. That is quite a coincidence, no?"

Alistair didn't look up. "If you say so."

"I couldn't help but imagine. I said to myself, Zevran, what if the elven warden had been in Antiva before she became a warden. Perhaps she would have abandoned a child before she abandoned Alistair. There is nothing written in stone that your own mother died in childbirth as the whores told you… perhaps your mother left you with an elven family that sold you to the whores… or died at the hands of brutal humans. Perhaps she then traveled to Orlais and became a warden, meeting Maric and becoming pregnant with your very own friend, Alistair. It would mean that you and I are brothers, my dear Alistair."

Alistair dropped the papers on the desk and looked at Zevran in disgust. "Oh, come now, Zevran. That's preposterous. It isn't possible and you know it."

Zevran frowned. "Why not? There are certain similarities between us. Our hair is a similar color. I am older than you – it is possible that my mother abandoned me and left Antiva. How could you know for certain?"

"Our personalities are nothing alike. We don't even like the same things."

"Ah, but we are attracted to the same women, my friend. I think that shows another similarity."

"You are attracted to anything that breathes. I'm a bit more… selective."

"Ah, but that is not the point. I believe we are long lost brothers, and as such I would like a hug from you." He stood up and opened his arms, beckoning to Alistair.

"No, Zevran, I will not hug you."

"Ah, not even to make your brother happy? Come now, do not be shy."

"You only want to be lecherous. Stay on your side of the room."

Zevran smiled mischievously. "You see! You can even read my mind! We definitely have a connection."

As Alistair wished he could be anywhere but there at that particular moment, Aeden and Leliana burst out in laughter. In Alistair's mind, the conversation simply gave him another reason to never want to meet his mother. Maker forbid that anything the assassin said could even remotely be true!