I'm placing this in the Star Trek: 2009 category rather than the Star Trek: The Original Series for this reason: The new Star Trek movies have added personalities to the characters, personalities I have not seen in the original TV show. The playboy/party-boy Jim Kirk was not seen in the 60's.


"Hey, Thpock, whath th' name of thith new planet we're vithiting?" Said one Captain James T. Kirk, his mouth full of macaroni and liquid cheese running down his chin.

"Captain Kirk, is the practice of speaking with food in one's mouth not considered unacceptable in human culture?" Replied First Officer Spock.

"Yuh didn't anthuh my quethtion, Mithter Thpock. Ath yuh captain, I command yuh to, mm, ah, that was a good bowl of mac and cheese, I command you to tell me the name of that planet!" Jim yelled, banging the table at the end.

Spock stared at Jim with a typical Vulcan look of confusion, pity, and superiority mixed together before responding.

"The planet, is not 'new,' as you say, captain. It was a center of Federation trade for thirty years until its recent retirement. Despite its inactivity, a distress signal was received from the area three days ago."

"When was it declared inactive?"

"In the past two weeks, captain."

"Who's been there in the past two weeks?"
"A group from Junior Starfleet, an extra-curricular summer program for children between the ages of ten and seventeen. One child was reported missing yesterday."

"Junior Starfleet? I made a speech at their headquarters last year. Those kids will go crazy. Get in, sign a couple of autographs, find the kid, sign another autograph, maybe get somebody's sister's phone number."

"I must warn you, captain, there are reports of a violent alien on the island. The brief glimpse of the creature did not provide enough information to determine species."

"Eh, it's probably just a Klingon cousin. Mr. Spock, set the coordinates. There is a child to be saved and a scared, female, relative to comfort!"


Is this humorous? I keep putting stories in the humor category without ever being sure that they're funny.