FCL64:Hola! This is the first chapter of 'Butter Chickens and Having a Cow'!
Kurama:Butter chickens?
FCL64:Indeed.
Kurama:(looking away) I fear for my life.
FCL64: Don't! The only thing at risk here is your sanity! I lost mine a long time ago, so I'm not worried. Heck, you should know that by now, Kurama. I spend enough time talking to the people in my head. This story is an attempt to prove that insanity is, in fact, contagious.
Kurama:I don't doubt it.
FCL64:(sarcastically) Thanks so much.
Kurama:Aren't you forgetting something?
FCL64:Oh! If I don't introduce the characters you can assume they don't belong to me. (she then proceeds to drag three people into the room.) This is Akiko, Kasumi, and Kiyoshi!
Akiko: Let go of me.
FCL64:Rayre.
Akiko:Rayre?
FCL64:Like a cat?
Akiko:Seriously?
FCL64:Yes. Now one last thing before a short, pointless, possibly non-existent plot begins. This chapter has what will probably be the only disclaimer, so listen up, because I need to say everything. I will introduce my characters, and my friends when they join us, but if you don't recognize them, don't assume I own them. If it looks like a screen name, it's probably one of my friends. And characters from manga other than YYH will probably visit, such as Shikamaru from Naruto, and characters from Hikaru No Go.
Sai:Did someone say Go? I wanna play!
FCL64:(smacks forehead) I was saying the disclaimer. And it's not like anyone here would be any kind of a match for you anyway. Unless Kurama already knows how to play Go.
Kurama:No, sorry.
Sai:(runs away crying)
FCL64:Now I feel a little bad.
Kurama: At least you have some decency.
FCL64:No, I just like Sai way too much. But not as much as I like Kiyoshi and Hiei! (she pulls Hiei from a dark corner of the room and pulls him and Kiyoshi into a group hug)
Kiyoshi:(when FCL64 finally lets go of a very angry Hiei and a stunned Kiyoshi, he puts one hand on top of the other) Awkward turtle.
FCL64:Awkward is such an awkward word.
Kasumi:I know! It's got not only two Ws, but they are also on either side of a K!
FCL64:(gasps, then hugs Kasumi) We're on the same brain wave! (looking at the others over her shoulder) That should scare you guys.
Kurama:It does, rest assured, it does.
Kasumi:Can't… breathe…
FCL64:(letting go of Kasumi) If only Pirate was here…
Pirate the Artist:But I am!
FCL64:Pirate!
PtA:I sensed something was going on without me, so I came over.
FCL64:Yay! Now there are two people on the same brain wave as me!
Everyone else:(makes a dash for the door, which turns out to be locked)
Kurama:Impossible! Why can't I pick the lock?!
Hiei:It's not just you. I can't get through either.
FCL64:It's 'impervious to blade and flame! I win!'
Hiei:Who is it you're quoting? That sounds familiar…
FCL64:You don't remember? That shows how little you care. Pirate, would you like to explain why they can't get through the door?
PtA:She's the author! She can do whatever she wants!
FCL64:Yay! Wait, I can do whatever I want? Then I want pie!
Kurama:And pie relates to this conversation how?
FCL64:It doesn't. Well, it didn't. But now look! (points to the middle of the room, where a giant pie is suddenly sitting) Yum, yum, yum! You guys can have a piece but be sure to check it for polyps, because you wouldn't want to offend them by eating them because they'll rule the world someday.
Kasumi:Polyps? Why would there be polyps in the pie? And how did you come to the conclusion that someday they'll rule the world?
FCL64:Do any of you know what a polyp actually is?
Kurama:It's a small animal belonging to a group called—
FCL64:Shut up. You're ruining this for me. Does anyone who isn't a genius with a photographic memory know what a polyp is? I thought not. And the fact that nobody knows exactly what they are makes them like ninjas. After all, how can you know exactly what something is when it's invisible? And ninjas will rule the world. Using the transitive property you get: polyps are ninjas and ninjas will rule the world; therefore, polyps will rule the world.
Kurama:I see a flaw in your logic.
FCL64:Oh?
Kurama:The transitive property is meant for math, not life.
FCL64:But math teachers always say you use math every day! That is geometry applied to real life!
Kiyoshi:Ninja polyps taking over the world is real life?
FCL64:(nodding enthusiastically) Yep.
Kurama:(with sarcasm, as he slowly and deliberately cuts a piece of pie and takes a bite without checking for polyps) Right.
FCL64:Don't come crying to me years from now when ninja polyps attack you with an okay from the government. It'll be your own fault. All they'll be trying to do is avenge their lost brethren.
Kiyoshi:Lost brethren?
FCL64:(nodding) uh-huh.
(FCL64, PtA, and Kasumi spend the next 3 hours picking through their pie looking for polyps. Kurama, Akiko, Hiei, and Kiyoshi spend the next 3 hours eating pie and watching the others look for polyps.)
