Prologue
Friendship is a door between two human beings. It might creak, it might be stuck somehow but it is never closed completely.
-Balthasar Gracián y Morales
I haven't yet stopped feeling her. I can see, hear and smell her.
But she's gone. Just gone, nobody knows where.
Her name itches like a spark on my tongue but I fear saying it out loud.
Alison, Alison DiLaurentis. I would have had so much to discuss with you but you aren't here anymore.
You've now disappeared for one year and I've never had the chance to tell you about the feelings I have for you. It seems like it's been yesterday; the five of us in Spencer's barn, everyone laughing and drinking the alcohol you brought, how you've frightened us creeping around the barn and extinguishing the lights.
So much has happened since that day and we have all drifted apart.
You can only find Spencer with Mona, the two of them can't be separated from each other and are entitled the smartest girls in the Rosewood High. Aria has changed her pink streak of hair for a blue one, then decided to make it violet and finally left it out completely. Hanna and her mother have moved to Germany because of commercial issues and I… I can't cease grieving for you.
The only thing that draws off my attention is swimming. Right, Ben is left for me, but I'm not sure if I still love him or if I'm even able to feel something towards boys but I am afraid of wiping the slate clean since he'll question me. He'll have questions I won't be able to answer because there is no existing answer. So I guess, I'll leave everything the way it is.
