Chapter One

Several billion years ago.

The multiverse smelled like burnt rubber and motor oil. Who knew?

Horrible cackling filled the red sky. Heat flushed against the boy's skin as tears poured down his face. For the first time, he cowered away from the one he loved and trusted more than anything. The boy looked up to see his best friend strutting around his chaos, several bricks of his body on fire. He neglected to put it out.

"How could you?" he screamed. His brother turned around, a mad gleam in his eye.

"Isn't this fun?" he laughed.

"No! You've got to stop!" He narrowed his eye and pushed his twin backwards.

"I'll do whatever I feel like!" he screeched. "I'm sick of your rules! Your order! No one's gonna get in my way!" The dimension behind them disintegrated into dust. He grinned at the destruction before him. "Reality is an illusion. The universe is a hologram," he sneered. "This is my chess board now." His fallen twin trembled.

"You're gonna regret this."

"You'll be the one regretting not joining me!" he snapped. "I'll make you a king - a god!"

"I never wanted to be a god!" He smirked, raising up his hand to snap his fingers once more.

"Then be a servant."

Present day.

"Welcome back boys and girls. I hope you all had a fun and relaxing summer vacation." Dipper chuckled into his hand as he shared a glance with Mabel across the room. She too was grinning. Fun - yeah their summer had been fun. Relaxing? Unless you considered dream demons and cults relaxing . . .

Their teacher called attendance and class droned on. Dipper could already tell Mabel was confused and bored by the end of their first math class. He would end up helping her a lot with that class and the ones to come - sometimes by letting her copy off of his tests. Anything for your sibling - right? Dipper figured it didn't hurt as long as his sister didn't end up doing anything in the future that would require the knowledge. And she wouldn't. In exchange, she helped him fake injuries for gym class. Not that he couldn't hold his own against the seniors hopped up on steroids . . . but getting himself killed in a dodgeball tournament was not how he wanted to die. He wanted to die doing something cool - like battling aliens with Grunkle Ford. Besides, they had to dress out for gym now - and Dipper was already teased enough for his scrawniness with his shirt and pants on - thank you very much.

But high school wasn't all bad. Dipper put as much energy into his studies as Mabel put into her artwork. They were both rising quickly to the top of their respective fields. Of course - school just seemed like a mandatory meeting they had to go to compared to what awaited them every summer. After leaving out some key details to their parents . . . okay most of all the details . . . their parents allowed them to return to Gravity Falls that summer. And the summer afterwards. And afterwards.

The rusty bus rolled to an unsteady stop in the loose gravel. Two lanky figures stepped out of the rusty bus for the third time after Weirdmaggedon. One wore a thick pink sweater in spite of the heat of the day. The shiny metal that usually marred her bright smile had been removed earlier that year. She grinned as she looked up through the familiar trees. Beside her, a slightly taller figure tried to hold on to various books and his duffel bag at the same time, almost spilling both into the dirt. He wore a red flannel shirt over a white t-shirt paired with blue jeans. His sneakers were muddy. He too was excited but his eyes gleamed with more curiosity than his sister's. The rusty bus squealed slightly as it drove off down the road.

The twins waddled down the road with their things. Usually they would have half the town welcoming them back to their summer home, but they had arrived a few days earlier than expected. Dipper would have called ahead, but Mabel had accidently dropped both of their phones in a jug of Mabel juice she had made that morning.

Dipper used his foot to open the door of the Mystery Shack, surprising a large man leaning against the counter. His eyes lit up with excitement.

"Dipper! Mabel!" They all grinned as they rushed forward to hug each other. "Dudes, I thought you guys weren't coming until this weekend?"

"Plans changed. We would've let you know, but Mabel destroyed our phones," Dipper said, giving his twin a pointed look. She stuck her tongue out at him.

"Well, your Grunkles won't be here until tomorrow anyway. Come in! Make yourselves comfortable! I'm assuming you guys will stay up in the attic again?" They nodded and hauled their stuff upstairs. Traces of their last summer stay stained the room. Glitter and paint splotches on Mabel's side, stray notes and the bones of chewed-up pens on Dipper's. Dipper relaxed as he breathed in the smell of the old cabin - a mix of oak and whatever odd chemical smells wafted up from the basement.

"Gravity Falls, it is good to be back," he whispered. The twins were now fifteen. Dipper felt the anticipation for finally being old enough to drive welling up in his bones. He was hoping they would get the chance to practice some before getting their permits.

The twins set their stuff down and went back downstairs. Soos was clad in the familiar Man of Mystery suit, proudly sporting the eyepatch. Melody, who had moved down permanently after Soos' proposal a few months ago, manned the cash register. Upon her arrival, Soos' abuelita had finally decided it was time for her to move out and Soos decided it would probably be better to get a normal house for him and his wife. Melody had helped abuelita pick out an apartment in town and was helping her move out as Soos moved his and Melody's things to their new house down the road. In the meantime, she slept with Soos in Stan's old room. The Grunkles would stay in Ford's old room upon their arrival. Well - Stan would. Ford would probably continue his habit of falling asleep on the basement bed downstairs most nights. Melody smiled warmly at the twins. Mabel immediately went over to her and started talking to her about the upcoming wedding. They had decided to hold it towards the end of summer. Mabel had nearly exploded when she first heard that Soos had proposed. Melody chuckled as Mabel gushed over potential locations and decorations. Dipper tried to zone her out so he could focus on his conversation with Soos.

"So tomorrow right? Any idea what time?"

"Nope. Probably early if Doctor Ford has his way." Though Dipper hated waking up early, he secretly hoped they got here as soon as possible. He couldn't wait to interrogate Ford about their adventures overseas.

A motorcycle revved loudly as it skidded into the parking lot - cutting off both conversations. Dipper smiled as he ran out the door. Loose gravel flew through the air as the cycle stopped. Its' rider took off her helmet, shaking her long red hair out. Wendy grinned down at the twins as she dismounted her ride. They all hugged. Dipper took of his hat and exchanged it with Wendy, continuing their hat-swap tradition. Her red motorcycle gleamed in the light - freshly waxed. She had finally saved up enough for it after years of working at the Mystery Shack. It was her prized possession. She still worked at the Mystery Shack during the summer. She had remained good friends with the Pines over the years. Dipper's crush over her was long-gone, for real this time. They were comfortable friends now - comfortable enough to tease each other about Dipper's previous crush.

"How have you losers been doing?" she asked. "High school been going good?" They shrugged.

"It's okay as long as Dipper lets me cheat off him!" Mabel laughed. "Some of my classes are actually pretty tough."

"It's not so bad." Dipper liked most of his classes. He was determined to take as many advanced courses as possible - so he crammed his schedule with all the college-level or advanced placement courses he could. He joined all the science clubs and math clubs he could, as well as a cinematography and art club. Needless to say, he didn't sleep much anymore. But who needed sleep when you could stay up all night studying advanced trigonometry or learning how to photograph specimens? Not that there was that much weird stuff in California anyway. The weirdest thing he often found to photograph or draw were tourists. He had hauled his camera equipment in hopes of capturing some good images for his journal. He was torn between liking to draw the anomalies he found, but pictures often captured more detail than a pencil could.

"How is college Wendy?" Mabel asked as they walked inside.

"Trade school man - and it's cool." Wendy had opted out of college and her family's usual trade, choosing instead to be a welder. She was now eighteen. She had gotten her GED and escaped the town a year earlier than the rest of her friends - who were graduating that year. She parked her motorcycle and walked the twins inside as they exchanged stories. Night came soon after and she drove home. Tired from their long bus ride - the twins went to bed early.

. . .

A car honking at six the next morning awakened them like a gunshot. Dipper jumped out of bed, dragging his sister to her feet as she grumbled something about a good dream about a blue-haired boy. She woke up soon enough as they saw the beat-up red car in the parking lot.

"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Ford!" The twins sprinted up to their Grunkles as they spilled out of Stan's old Diablo. Dipper ran to Ford first, going on a mile a minute about what he had learned in his cinematography class and his ideas for more adventuring that summer. Stan coughed as Mabel squeezed him too hard. He chuckled, ruffling her hair.

"Good to see you too kiddo, but don't kill me before I even get in the door. I need some coffee. Or maybe some vodka after that car ride," he grumbled, glaring at his twin. Mabel sheepishly let go, giving him some space to breathe. Ford stuck out his tongue at his twin.

"There's less cars on the road at night. And less cops," he pointed out.

"Doesn't mean it's a good idea to drive a 100 on mountain roads." Ford rolled his eyes.

"I'm still a better driver than you." The twins switched Grunkles and then helped them carry their stuff inside. Dipper noticed that their bags still smelled of sea salt . . . and weird chemicals. Ford had sent Dipper letters outlining their adventures - but nothing close to the detail Dipper wanted to hear them in.

"Okay, you've got to tell me everything!" Dipper demanded, nearly stepping on Ford's heels as they walked in the door. "You never explained how -"

"Jeez Dipper, let the man sit down for a minute before you start pestering him," Stan interrupted, heading straight for the coffee maker, rubbing his nose as if he had a headache. Ford rolled his eyes.

"He's grumpy from the long drive. But let me get some of my stuff unpacked first and then I'll show you some the cool stuff we brought back!"

"Speaking of driving," Mabel drawled. "You've gotta teach us how to drive this summer!"

"Are you two old enough to have permits?" Ford asked.

"Nope! But we will be by the end of the summer!"

"There is absolutely no way I'm letting my brother teach you how to drive!" Stan and Ford said simultaneously.

"You both can! I'll take Grunkle Ford and Dipper can have Grunkle Stan!"

"Uh - I'll take Grunkle Ford - thanks," Dipper said. Ford beamed as Stan scowled.

"Just for that - I'm going to take you first!"

"Let's go right now!" Mabel cheered. The older twins exchanged a look.

"Well . . . it's still early enough that cops won't be out and about," Ford said. "And I doubt you'll be willing to get up early any other day this summer." Stan rolled his eyes.

"One time," he said warningly. "That's it!" Mabel grinned. She and Ford entered the old Diablo first.

"Okay," Ford said, launching into a long conversation about what each button on the console did. Mabel listened for about thirty seconds before slamming down on the gas pedal, eliciting a high-pitched scream from Ford as the car peeled out of the parking lot. By the time they arrived back, Ford had seen his life flash before his eyes too many times to count.

"Never again," he muttered. Stan and Dipper took their places. Dipper waited for his Grunkle to explain what to do as Stan sat silently.

"What?" he asked.

"Aren't you going to tell me what to do?"

"Gas means go. Brake means stop. Move the wheel to turn. Driving's not that hard, Kid." Dipper took a deep breath and lightly pressed the gas. The car moved at a crawl around the parking lot until Stan got bored and demanded to get out.

"What? I was being careful!" Dipper protested. "Someone in this family has to be!"

"I'm going straight to bed!" Stanley announced as they walked back inside the Shack. "We're stuck all summer with you two . . . you'll see enough of me in the next few months." Mabel fake-pouted.

"Aw - that's not true! We love you Grunkle Stan!" She suffocated him in another hug. Stan rolled his eyes but one who knew him well could very well see the soft look in his eyes as he patted her head.

"Yeah, yeah, let me sleep, Weirdo."

GLSSHU DQG ZHQGB VKDUH IODQQHO VKLUWV.

Author Note:

Hey guys! Thanks for reading. I just wanted to say that I pulled from several different Gravity Falls fandoms as well as CMVs and other youtube animations and all the credit goes back to the original creators. I also included a lot of different song lyrics. I also make fun of a lot of the more typical ships – so don't get too offended – it's all meant in good fun. There is also gore and weird stuff that happens – so be warned if you are squeamish. Other than that – have fun and keep it weird.

~MAB:)