"Love Yourself"

windlady

She never exactly believed in love. For 19 years, her heart belonged only to her fantasies. He was always surrounded by the brightest lights. In his heart, he is always unsure of where his path will take him. Could it be his fate? Or just is it just one of her fictional stories?

windlady: Hello. I'm back again this for my sembreak. It won't be for long though. Hm, contrary to what most of you must have thought, I'm not yet giving up on my other stories. But as I grow, I realize my mistakes. I think my other stories are not worthy enough to be read so I'm going to let them 'grow' a bit more before I return to updating them. Now, this story is a standalone story coming from me. It is inspired by my admiration for Kazuya Kamenashi of KAT-TUN. After watching his show, Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge, I was inspired to write a story which would represent how I feel for him. No, the plot is a lot different from the show but there are some little noticeable similarities. The credit of the title goes to KAT-TUN's Love Yourself, which is the theme song of Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge. Happy reading!

Disclaimer: I do not own and Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge nor do I own KAT-TUN's Love Yourself. I'm only an ordinary soul who is under a spell for a while.

"Sticky Note: HIRED!"

By windlady

"GAHHHH! SUZU-CHAN GOT HIRED!"

"EHHH?"

"SUZU-CHAN, CONGRATULATIONS!"

"HUH? WHA-"

"HOORAYYY! HOORAYY!"

"Erm, can somebody please explain what the hell happened here?"

5:30am. I just woke up and I'm still on my bed covered by blankets. My pajamas are crumpled and the sunlight is partially entering my room. Those sounds a while ago are from the video I'm watching right now. One week ago, I received a notification that I'm hired. It's been my childhood dream to be a manga artist so when I received the news, I was like an idiot. This video they captured showed my goofy smile and I think it will be the ugliest me for the rest of my life.

"I don't hate Love. I just don't know where to find it."

I murmured those words as I typed them, the first sentence of my draft. It's still too early for me to start but I've been informed about the subject my manga project will be dealing with. The needed requirements would be for its title to be about the self, for the plot to be inspiring and light-hearted, and for it to include romance in its genre. My employer is a wealthy young singer who is just rising to his stardom. And what's more? I have a huge crush on him.

Is it luck or an effect of some sort from a spell I learned from a freaky witchcraft book? Well, not that I care about it as much as I care about meeting my current source of inspiration. I grinned as a small squeal escaped my lips while I prepared myself for today. Eck, I'm totally being a fan girl.

My name is Akimoto, Suzuna. But that's already my Japanese name. My birth name is Azsellainne Duskmielt. It sounds very Western to Asians but I am part Chinese, part Spanish and part Russian. Back in my hometown they call me "Yan" which means blossoming flower. Still, my appearance is not Russian, Chinese or Spanish. I stand small and am only about 5 feet and 2 inches. I'm petite and I don't get fat no matter how much I eat. My hair is straight and is deep black while my eyes are just plain brown like most of the ordinary people. While I stare at the mirror, I see nothing special about me except that most of the people I meet get confused by my ethnicity. As what other people always say, I look more like the Japanese. Maybe that's because I love Japanese animations or do cosplays but then I'd rather believe that it is because my passion towards the Japanese culture and animation shows even on my physical aspects. I live my dreams. That way, I'm a complicated person.

You see, to follow my passion, I ran away from home with all my savings and migrated to Tokyo when I was in middle school. Somehow, I managed to survive for a month by working part-time in a small bakery. The next month, my family finally allowed me to stay in Japan and started sending me allowance. In my school, my classmates had a hard time pronouncing my name so eventually I began using my Japanese name. And soon enough I got used to it so whenever I introduce myself, I forget to inform them about my real name. I just turned 19 last month and today I'm reading a birthday fic written for me by a fellow fan fiction author. I haven't been online since a month ago because I just had the busiest school year and so my notifications from my internet accounts are spamming my mail. Included there are the alerts from FanFiction. Net. Most of them are from my favorite stories. Genre: Romance. Yes, that's right. I'm a hopeless case. I may even freak you out if I say that I dream of marrying a fictional character and I am very willing to die if I can enter their fictional world in my afterlife.

For about 19 years, I have always been into my fantasies. I never cared about any real male human. Humans lie. Humans are arrogant. Humans can hurt you. But if it's just fictional, there won't be any lies, secrets or hurts. It will always be free and beautiful. That was my fantasy of love. It was how I define my dream of Love. It has always been like that. But somehow my heart has started beating differently. It was that time. That time when I heard his voice.

"SUZU-CHAN! COME!"

"EH? What's the matter, Yukari-sempai?"

I was in the club room finishing the format of the new school paper when our editor-in-chief called me. It was already pass dismissal time and the other staffers already left the room. Yukari-sempai has always been informal when it's just the two of us, just like a family. Sempai and I met 2 years ago. She was a sophomore that time and I have always admired her. She's intelligent, pretty and popular in school but what I admired most about her is that she is surprisingly kind-hearted even when she seems so strong on the outside.

"Here! Listen to this."

She pulled me closer, dragging me by my uniform's collar. I obediently bended towards her which is why I ended up leaning towards her table. She plugged the earpieces in my ears and then I heard…

"Love Yourself
Come on, don't overdo yourself
As your heart is, as you are
Realize this love that can shine
I love this you that you hate

This clumsy you is alright
As you feel, as the wind
Dance in the sky just like a flower
I'll embrace this you that you hate…"

My world stopped for eternity but I was zapped back into the earth when Yukari-sempai pulled the earpieces away. She was smiling mischievously as she trotted behind me and patted my shoulder.

"I win."

"Eh?"

"You're still a girl after all."

For the longest time, she and our other staffers were going about who can turn me into a real girl. Real girl means someone who actually admires guys from the real world. Thus, it is the opposite of a girl who goes gaga over fictional characters and 2D hotties. By far, she's the first to claim that she won. Yukari-sempai was chuckling as she headed towards the door. "Kazuki."

"What?"

"That's his name. That singer." She winked as she stood half-way out of the door. I stuttered as I was about to protest that I didn't ask for it and I didn't even want to know of it, however, she has already known so much of me long before I learned of how naïve I am when it comes to these things. "Your cheeks are red."

On impulse, my hands reached for my face. It may be an attempt to cover my warmed face or maybe it was just to check if I am really blushing but it felt strangely embarrassing. The door closed without me saying anything. I was left dumbfounded. This uncomfortable warmth on my chest... What is it? I don't like this feeling.

I clicked the internet tab close as I removed my headset. I still can't concentrate. Maybe I just have to put off the fic until later. I think I'm too overwhelmed. I swerved my head and watched the thickness of the fluffy white clouds go by. The sky seems so bright with its baby blue color. The greens of the trees around me made me feel a bit comforted. There are so many people on the streets today, I noticed. Many of them must be like me. They must be looking forward to a new beginning, a destination which they must never have expected to have in their lives. I'm riding a cab to my workplace and to make sure I look respectable in my appearance, I even wore the best clothes I have in my condo unit. I gave a sigh to relieve the fluttering butterflies in my stomach. It's unbelievable how lucky a person can get. I'm in Peak Recording Company now and today marks my first day as a mangaka.

Staring at my playlist, I whispered to myself. I'll finally be able to meet him. I turned my tablet pc off and paid the driver. Stepping out in of the cab and standing in front of the company's building brought shivers down my spine. Such a sophisticated-looking building which is definitely swarming with famous and rich celebrities inside is now in front of me. This is crazy. I pinched my cheek and felt pain. It hurts, I cringed. Silly me, I thought as I laughed a bit and started walking my way to the entrance. I guess I'm not dreaming, eh? My first human crush. I'll get to see him soon. And unlike what my crazy friends say, not all celebrities are only beautiful outside. I'm not delusional or imagining him to be like my fictional crushes. My feelings of admiration towards him won't change once I get to know him… because he's really beautiful, even from the inside. I can feel it. And I'll prove this soon… as his manga artist.

"So please… Dear God, I beg of you. Don't change the way I fee-"

BUMP

"Ow… that hurts." I fell on the floor when something smooth and hard bumped my legs.

"Huh? Sorry." A familiar voice.

"Uh-No, it's okay." I cautiously stood and turned to smile at the person behind me but then was shocked to see his face. My eyes widened and I felt my jaw dropped. This guy is- KAZUKI YAMATO?

~To be continued…~

windlady: Done with the teaser. It's kinda boring and cliché for now but things will change eventually. This will probably last 3-5 or 6 chapters only and it'll mostly be depending on everyone's reactions since I'm not that good in writing with the 1st person point of view. I think that's about it? So how about a comment or so?