Of All the Weird Things That Happen in Doctor Bishops Lab

" Walter how is this even possible…?'' Anna asked. Her hands indicating her body; which for some bizarre reason now looked exactly like Peters.

And less than five feet away scowling in her direction like this was all her fault-her own body, present moment housing none other than Peter himself. She offered him a scowl of her own that felt unnatural to her but right now everything felt unnatural. The length of her arms, the height of her body the lack of her pretty red hair against her neck and most of all the pressure of her bladder yelling for release.

She was unsuccessfully ignoring the idea of having to go to the bathroom and to touch Peter Bishop's equipment….. The whole idea seemed wrong. Anna knew unless Walter could undo this situation quickly she'd have no choice.

And right now Walter was looking as lost for words as she felt, wringing his hands as he assessed the data for the procedure.

'' Walter,'' Peter tried putting his hand upon Walters shoulder, or my hand I should say.

'' I always wanted a daughter….'' Walter remarked. Peter sighed. Anna laughed into the pregnant silence that followed before Walter swiveled in her direction and answered.

'' I believe my dear that this procedure can be reversed….. Only…. I will need time to understand why this happened….''

'' How much time Walter….'' Peter spoke in my tone from behind us.

'' Well measuring the calibrations….the timing between progressions…..All of this Peter is highly theoretical of course…. its quiet wonderful actually….'' Walter clasped his hands together in watery eyed delight.

'' Considering all the facts like I greatly needed to use the bathroom…..as if I even know how to aim a penis…I'm not so sure this is wonderful Walter… '' Anna huffed.

'' Well Peter can help he's had plenty of practice…. '' with that doctor Bishop turned back to his work muttering about his need for that food or another.

Leaving me and Peter in a Mexican standoff. And then in his usually flippant attitude Peter spoke.

'' He's right you know….I think showing you how to pee is the least of our problems….''

And then I did something completely unlady like, I growled…. Peter smiled.

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'' You know it's allot easier at the urinal..'' Peter commented from behind me.

'' Perhaps, it is but I don't relish the idea of someone walking in seeing you in my body handling your penis…. I mean how exactly do we do this anyhow…'' Anna felt just plain weird about this. She could feel the press of her own breast which were obviously sensitively erect standing closely as there wasn't much room in these stalls. And she was getting warm swimming feelings in her lower abdomen…. why would she be attracted to her own body?

And why couldn't they make these stalls god damn bigger. All right girl it's just Peter behind you you've worked with him, this is just another business arrangement, nothing to get all swooning over….she tried to diffuse the situation, wondering if Peter was battling with this as much as she was.

She unbuttoned and unzipped the pants her hands trembling just a little. She looked down pulling it out through the slit in the boxers, and now it was in her hand. Blowing out a breath of relief -this wasn't too bad she could do this….she felt Peter tense behind her.

God, he was most likely freaking that she'd tell him it was too small, crooked in some weird way or resembled Abraham Lincoln or something. Instead she did neither of those things she said the first thing to pop from her mouth; oy-she was bad with this, so she tried to make it sound like a joke.

'' Well, it's a lot bigger than I imagined….. '' She laughed mockingly, until his arms snaked around her waist and it jumped to his, my touch, our fingers intertwined in some strange sexually charged knot over Peters member. His or my fingers were warm and I suddenly wished this little experience could be over quickly.

'' A little warning would have been nice Bishop…'' Anna ground out. Because his touch was doing alarming things to her body-she needed to focus and learn how to do this herself. That was when she knew he understood how this was affecting her- too much more of this and she'd be peeing upwards.

'' Relax….just relax…'' he breathed at my neck.

'' I'm just guiding your/mine/ or whatever hands in technique…. ''

'' Yes, and baiting me in the process….'' I replied darkly.

He laughed lightly into the skin at the base of her neck.

'' Unless you want a golden shower Bishop I suggest you get the hell on with it….''

'' I was just testing a theory Anna…. seems I was right…''

'' Considering Bishop I know just how to make my own body respond…. you should probably keep the grouping to a minimum…. ''

'' Besides, '' I continued..

'' The only thing you just proved is that your penis responds to my physical touch…''

'' I wouldn't put too much stock in that sweetheart….it responds to just about anything….Most likely would find an nighty- year- old hooker with no teeth just as exciting as your touch….''

'' Oh, yeah-that's right all men need is the stimulation…'' Anna verbally sparred.

Peter laughed darkly behind her, the shaking of his fingers on his/ her penis sending goose bumps up her/ his spine.

'' You may be right about men not needing much to get us aroused….But then again you're not all male right now are you?….'' Peter let that comment hang in the air around us…He was right….assuming it was my consciousness inside his body shouldn't it take more to arouse me? And if that were true wouldn't the logic also follow that I/ him wanted that touch.

Peter seemed to have been coming slowly to the same conclusions because he stood quiet still behind me. And then like always fending off the obvious question he fell back on his good old humor tactic.

'' Even in my body you can't resist me sweetheart….awww, that's so endearing-but also kind of pathetic….''

And there it was he'd turned it around on me…..the bonding moment-sarcastically phrased of course….was gone I flexed my hands wished for a miracle- punching my own body would do no good. And I had no way of knowing my strength in Peters fist, why was it like this between us?

'' Watch it Bishop, or I might just do something I'll regret… ''

Peter had always known how to get under her skin, since the day they met it been like a battle of wills, a dance of sorts. Anna did respect him….his only saving grace- but there was this constant tension around them. He made her do things she would normally not do, a thorn in the side of her life. Most days she could ignore his badgering yet if he really wanted to rile her up he usually could.

'' Really what are you going to do sneak into my bedroom in the middle of the night and have your way with me….?'' His voice was dripping with sarcasm, and she could just imagine that down cast smile of his.

'' Try me…..I'm not without scruples you know…..and now I even have balls….'' She said all this hoping to unnerve the bastard…. Anna wouldn't really sneak into his bedroom….if she did it might just be fun to handcuff him to the headboard and leave him their naked; after pouring honey all over his chest and making him believe, no making him want more…..

It's was just about that time Anna noticed she was done; she sighed and slipped the penis back inside its nestled hiding place, away from grouping hands.

'' Alright Peter perhaps we should call some kinda truce, this whole thing is gonna be awkward at best…. I mean the showering and the morning wood….and I actually have a pretty active sex life-were gonna have to put aside our differences and all the pettiness that could defiantly come in this situation…''

'' You have a sex life….'' He asked eyebrow quirked in surprise.

'' And why wouldn't I….I'm not a nun….''

'' It's just you never seemed that interested in….men, or sex in general….''

'' Oh, I see just because I've never made ga-ga eyes at you…..'' Peter interrupted Anna there.

'' That's not what I meant and you know it….''

'' I like to keep my sexual and working life separate….''I said turning to look into my own eyes twinkling back Peters brand of humor.

'' Oh, and here I thought you were just a prude…..'' he mimicked.

'' I could tell you stories Peter Bishop that would make a stripper blush….''

Peter smiled, he got to me and he knew it.

'' Perhaps later you could tuck me in and read me few…'' he quipped.

I opened my mouth to tell him just where I thought he could stick that idea and that's when the restroom door banged open and Walters voice range out through the tiled setting.

'' Peter, I have some theories…..and I believe son….son…'' the squeak of his shoes as he spun around the white tiled room reverberated off the walls.

'' Were in here Walter…..'' Peter said in an exasperated voice adding under his breath…. guess the stall was a better choice.

'' Peter it's been nearly a quarter hour….. It's just a penis not rocket science…. ''

'' There were complications Walter….''

'' Ohhhh, what kind of complications …..''

'' Just the auspicious kind….'' Peter answered winking in her direction, what the hell was that about. Was Peter implying he enjoyed baiting her, Anna wondered?

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Anna yawned jaw stretching and popping into her cupped palm. She was by nature a night owl….always had been. But it wasn't even technically night anymore and at Walters words of souls, over souls, and monads she'd started to drift. Leave it to tonight to get a case of insomnianic relief.

It was kind of strange Walter was speaking of souls at all, but now it had just become a constant mumble of Walter speak, Anna hoped like always Peter was keeping up better than her. Because the top of this desk was starting to look more and more like a comfortable mattress. Perhaps, she just needed some coffee. And as Walters theories swam more and more round her head, seeming to her none of this was going to be fixed as quickly as she liked. She rubbed at her eyes for the fifteenth time in the last hour…releasing she could smell Peter on his hands, and in her half waking thoughts considered Peter Bishops smell to be not that bad at all.

Peter glanced in her direction, stifling a smile as his/ her head came close to thumping harshly into the desk. He still wasn't used to seeing his body and Anna's movements, facial expressions, and or that crinkle thing she did with her nose. He knew eventually he was going to have to say something about the fact that anyone who knew them in the slightest would not possibly believe she was him and he was her. He'd even had to catch himself trying to adjust his now non-existent crotch.

And now that ache in bladder little miss stuffy pants had experienced earlier was letting him know he was either going to relieve himself right here or use the facilities promptly. But hell, she had done it…and all he had to do was sit down. There was only one problem….

Peter was a man-and a very curious one at that…..he'd been trying to curve his little- when and if fantasies since he'd first felt his/her nipples tighten and engorge just from the brush of her/his back in the bathroom stall. He'd tried to play it off but the throb between his/her legs had only intensified when he found their hands cupped around his penis.

All of this was so far off kilter…her/ his body responding to his body-his/her body responding to her own bodies touch. He had lied a little bit when stating anybody could make him hard. But the idea of her body making him hard added with the idea that they were not even in their respective bodies in the first place….it confused him damnit!

It made Peter not just want to get answers but to understand. So, he played it off- he did what he always did when frustrated he took it out on Anna. He knew it was not fair….that he was being childish. Yet, he enjoyed it. Peter liked their verbal sparring as juvenile as that is, he looked forward to it.

He wanted to blame it on her….all of this arousal…yet, that didn't make much sense either. So he had come to the conclusion….the idea that perhaps they'd been playing around these feelings- both of them- for quiet sometime. Like the five year-old boy who found himself pulling the braid and hurting the girl he actually liked. Peter sighed; he thought he was above that kind of cave-man mentality.

Apparently he was wrong, rising and heading quickly towards the bathroom, he was trying not to attract too much attention. Peter wondered at that time whether he wouldn't have at least a peek at the high strung Anna's treasure-trove. He'd always wondered whether she was a natural red head.

Anna was drifting, dreaming of strong arms circling her waist, pulling gently then with more insistency. But everything seemed to be covered in molasses, dark and beautifully amber. Points of light had began to pierce the heavy burdens around the comforting arms that were still pulling them forward and no matter how hard Anna tried to see who the man in front of her was….The amber would shadow his features making them incomplete like a smudge of chalk on paper.

'' Stop….please….why are you helping me…'' the man didn't respond but pulled up short, his back towards her. Because in the strange language of dreams, she understood that's exactly what this man was doing. His answer was slow in coming but deliberately phrased.

'' Because….there are illusive contexts….you…need to understand….And you must open your eyes, or the limitations will blind you to the truth…..''

That was when I awoke, laughing to myself- just some silly dream….I thought?

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It was at that same moment that Peter was discovering the joys of female anatomy. A little sweep with a thumb here, a counter clock wise movement around the sensitive area there. He'd always been good with his hands, with putting pieces together to get results….and this wasn't that much different. In fact Peter was trying so hard to keep the sounds of his breathing to a minimum and focus on the resulting orgasm-he was slowly building-that he didn't hear the door swing open till it was too late. Thank God girls used stalls.

Well, suppose he'd have to finish that one later.

'' Peter, are you in here?'' Anna questioned.

'' Yes,'' He replied trying to keep the quaver from his voice.

'' I really think we should get some rest….not sure we're doing Walter any good hanging round here…'' Anna posed the question they had booth been avoiding asking for the last few hours.

Peter made it sound lewd.

'' Your place or mine?'' Peter asked lopsided grin in place as he swung though the stall door. Anna rolled her eyes.

'' Less questions would be asked, if we of course went back to yours and Walters….and we really need to discuss whether telling anybody about this is a good idea….Right now Astrid is the only one who knows….of course we could try and take each other's place for the time being…But let's wait till my brain has gotten some rest, to make any plans….''

Batting her eyelashes which looked just wrong on Peter's face she studied him intently and then looked away with a smile-that's when she said the very thing Peter had been hoping to circumvent, and he couldn't believe she dared to mention it at all. She had to have known what he'd been doing. Well- he was probably flushed and covered in a light sheen of over-exertion. And with a look of guilt she'd come to recognize by working with him. But Anna just had to raise that bar, he thought inwardly.

She couldn't let the moment pass.

'' Oh and Peter, next time you feel like exploring-I have some great toys….the rabbits actually my favorite…''

'' Sweetheart don't be absurd…. I was just trying to master female physiology….'' Peter tried in his manliest effort to brush her comments off and come out with his pride intact.

'' Sure Bishop it always takes me a good forty-five minutes to pee….Don't worry bout it anyway, I had already planned on taking your dog out for a walk…'' Anna winked leaving Peter to follow slightly blushing at her audacity and grinning sheepishly.

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As Anna was preparing to take off with Peter….sliding his long and very nice arms through the black wool of his coat, the ring on her cell went off. Unfortunately, she was so in the middle of shuffling files and returning pens into holders she didn't register the tone that came across identifying the caller, or she just would have hung up. Pressing the send button she lifted the receiver and heard Peter's voice courteously of one doctor Walter Bishop answer with a curt hello. She nearly dropped the phone before the caller spoke.

Oh, yeah-she was in Peter's body what a crazy situation…this was gonna be tricky.

'' Umm…I was looking for Anna, I think I may have misdialed by mistake….'' the strong sound of Ethan's Scottish brogue, speaking softly into the other end.

'' Actually, she just stepped out for a minute asked me to relay any messages…'' It was a pathetic excuse if ever she could think of one… Ethan knew her too well to believe it.

'' Oh wait….I think I hear her coming now…'' Anna put her hand against the receiver and looked at Peter with begging bambi eyes.

'' Please Peter I will do anything if you do this favor for me….''

'' Anything….. I want….'' he strung out meticulously….

'' Yes, tell the man on the phone….His name is Ethan, to put the bag- pipes away, the cargo plane is full up tonight….''

Peter looked at me strangely but grabbed the phone none the less.

'' Hello, Ethan…..I'm sorry…..you want to put your what, where…'' Anna could see the color flooding Peter's surprised expression; she could understand Ethan loved to talk dirty, the dirtier the better actually.

'' Well Ethan as wet as that makes me….tonight you're going to have to put the bag-pipes away, the cargo plane is full up tonight…..'' Then Peter abruptly ended the phone call with a look of disgust.

'' If that's the kind of filth you cavort with Anna…''

'' Ethan is actually very sweet…thank you very much….'' Anna intoned angry that he had any right to judge who she spent time with, and then she remembered that at least he'd done it for her, and grew kind of quiet. Her bottom lip was being worried by her teeth; Peter had had no reason to do that for her. Except the idea she promised she would do anything for him.

'' Peter, thank you, that was very sweet of you…'' Anna stated so quietly she wasn't sure if he'd heard until he answered.

'' Just an apology isn't going to get you out of the bargain….sweetheart….'' And with a smile he tossed the keys into the air catching them before shoving them into his/ her coat pocket.

'' Might as well get going, before I think too much into the image of your reply to that filthy phone statement…I am curious about the whole bag-pipe cargo plane thing though…''

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'' Now as we enter the darkened parking lot…you do realize I will be playing the part of damsel in distress….so if any shady characters, or ninja's happen to make an appearance….it will be your job to protect me….'' Peter joked.

'' Well that's too bad since I left my trusty steed in the garage….''

'' Okay, I get the whole bagpipe bit considering he was obviously a Scott, but I got to ask does the cargo plane thing mean what I think it does….'' Peter asks leaning toward me.

'' It just means that I'm already occupied Peter…''

'' And the idea of you with other men doesn't bother him…..''

'' Not yet it hasn't….separate lives, all that…''

'' Doesn't that bother you….'' Peter asked.

'' Life's not a fairy tale Peter….''

'' Did you ever believe….in the dysnyprincess ending I mean…'' Peter asked nonchaunatly like it wasn't as important a question as it was.

'' Sometimes I do…in those moments before I fully open my eyes…the golden moments of dawn….A bit maudlin I suppose…..'' I laughed turning my face further away like the falling snow had absorbed my thoughts. And I remembered a little girl who had always dreamed her knight would right out of the darkness, and rescue her like Repunzel ….in her favorite story. One Tear slid her cheek as they drove on through the snow towards Peter and Walters house a hot shower would do her some good, and give her time to think. She also, blushed at the idea of being a naked Peter Bishop in the shower and wondered-if she might do a little exploring of her own.