First Fanfic! Yes we needed another HikaxKao story xD Im completely nervous about this..like extremely nervous on how it will be reviewed..if it get reviewed at all..*nervous laugh*
Well anyway..So yea first fanfic.. so please be gentle. I wrote this out of slight depression, but hey..i get some crazy ideas when I'm sad xDD
Horrible summary I know..but Im terrible at writing summaries T.T but its the best I could come up with xD
OH! And Im terrible at writing from Hikarus POV..but i felt i had to add in Hikarus POv xD
Disclaimer! I do not own Hikaru Kaoru, and well Host Club at all *tear* I only own the plot and the emotions expressed by Kaoru xD *nervous laugh
~Kaoru's POV~
I sat in the limo on my way home from school with my beloved Hikaru sitting next to me, not even bothering to look at me or hold my hand like he normally does. I stared out the window watching the landscape quickly change by the second and I thought to myself Does he know it hurts? He's hurting me...I doubt he even cares. He doesn't love me anymore.. I was shocked when I came across that thought.. Well it's the truth don't ignore it! Tears started to form and eventually fall down my now flushed face. This pain.. It hasn't gone away.. I want it gone.. But I can't lose him! That would be the worst pain I would ever feel. Knowing I've lost my brother, my twin, and most importantly, my lover. The thought of losing him made more tears fall; I couldn't take it anymore. I looked over to my twin (who hasn't seemed to notice my crying) and immediately blurted out without thinking.
"Hikaru do you still love me?''
~Hikaru's POV~
''Hikaru do you still love me?'' That one sentence alone was enough to pull me out of my thoughts and I turned to look at my mirror image to see him with tears making, their way down his flushed face. Just by looking at him I wanted to cry myself. I didn't know if I loved him anymore.. Yes I'll always love him like a brother, but the love beyond that.. I just don't know anymore. I wanted to answer him, but I just couldn't bring myself to breaking his pure little heart. I just couldn't do that to my poor innocent little brother. I looked at my crying little twin and opened my mouth to speak but he immediately cut me off from saying anything.
"Hikaru I can tell you don't love me anymore.. Just by how you act and how you always seem to talk about her.''
I looked at him in shock. I really did just love him like a brother. I lost all my love for him and I don't know why, but he found out and I feel terrible. But the truth hurts. ''I'm sorry Kaoru.'' was all I managed to say before Kaoru quickly escaped from the moving limo. I looked at him in shock and tried to make the driver stop, but he refused and turned to see my little brother laying on the ground helpless next to the busy freeway.
~Kaoru's POV~
''I'm sorry Kaoru.'' I looked at him, extremely hurt and more tears fell. That's all he can say! That he's sorry? THAT'S IT? I couldn't take it anymore! He shattered my heart one too many times already and this time, he's not going to be the one who fixes it. Full of emotions, I swung the limo door open and threw myself out. I heard a slight crack that sent immense pains through my arm and I couldn't feel my wrist. The physical pain could be healed, but could my broken heart? He doesn't love me. He loves her! I'm just his back up and I'm sick and tired of it! If he runs to me after being rejected, I'm not going to care. He deserves to feel all the pain he's put me through! I sighed and began to walk in the direction of the school, holding my arm and crying.
After hours of walking, I finally arrived at Ouran Academy, covered in mud and sweat under the cloak of night. On the way I fell many times straight into the mud... What a fantastic day this was! Having your heart crushed by your very own twin brother, and breaking my wrist. Although that was my fault for jumping out of the limo. But that wasn't what hurt the most, the pain in my heart was tearing at me. It was so painful..
"WHY HAS HE DONE THIS TO ME?"
I screamed to the empty school. I wished I could have been answered. I wanted to know what I did wrong to make him loose his love for me. Did I show my love to much? To less? I want to know. Then again I can't stand being around him anymore. He caused me so much pain..I don't want to deal with him anymore. I began to wander around the empty school aimlessly, still cradling my now throbbing arm. I decided to search the school in hopes of finding something that could help me somehow..
After awhile of searching I found what I had been looking for. A nice shower and a extra uniform which just so happened to be my size. I quickly cleaned myself up and changed into the nice new uniform. I searched around until I came across some gauze to wrap my wrist with, then I found my way to Music Room 3. I walked inside and sat on one of the many couches in the ever so vacant room and started to cry again.
"It hurts Hikaru...what did I do wrong?"
I stayed in the choir room, letting all my emotions run free, until I eventually drifted into a deep sleep.
~Hikaru's POV~
As the limo driver refused to stop, all I could do is turn around and look at my poor, helpless twin. I feel terrible for what I have done to him. But it was all true, I don't love him as much as I have before, but I just don't know why. I don't have any feelings for anyone else. God, what's wrong with me? The whole car ride home, I couldn't stop thinking about poor little Kaoru. I hurt him terribly and I doubt I can fix this. I'm such a fool. As the limo pulled up to our mansion, I hoped that Kaoru was there. Once the limo stopped, I quickly ran out of the car to search the house for my brother. I searched and searched, in hopes that Kaoru was home, but sadly, he was no where to be found. I walked into our room and began to worry. What if he didn't survive after he jumped out of the car? Could that have been his way of... Suicide? Tears started to form at that thought, and I decided to try contacting him. I quickly reached for my phone and dialed Kaorus number. I waited and waited for someone to pick up and eventually I heard a faint.
"Hello?"
Thinking it was Kaoru, I immediately started asking questions.
"Kaoru! Are you okay? Where are you? You need to come home! I'll ha-"
I was cut off as the voice said,
"Hikaru? Is something wrong? What happened to Kaoru?"
I realized that I had called Tamaki instead of Kaoru and tears formed and I quickly hung up and threw my phone against the wall.
"Kaoru I'm sorry! Please come home!"
I yelled this over and over hoping that he could hear me and find his way home, but I knew it was hopeless in finding my brother.
~The Next Morning~
I slowly began to wake up. It was a Wednesday morning with the sun already risen, filling the room with rays of sunlight making their way through the heavy draped windows. I slowly opened my eyes while yawning and sat up. For a brief moment, I thought that Kaoru was laying next to me, but then I remembered... I had broken his heart and he had fled from me in hurt and disgust. I had tried to go search for him, but I wasn't allowed out of the house, so I spent all night worrying about Kaoru until I fell asleep. I feel so terrible for what I had done to my brother, but this just couldn't of been avoided. I quickly showered and dressed for school and pretended like it was just another normal happy day. The maids quickly prepared my breakfast, which consisted of tea and scrambled eggs. I wasn't that hungry, so my food was left untouched, except for the parts of where I had pushed over with a fork, as I made my way to the limo.
As the limo pulled up to Ouran Academy, I quickly hurried out of the limo and rushed into the school. I prayed that my brother would be here, but sadly I could not find him, so I sat through the day wondering and worrying about Kaoru.
~Kaorus POV~
I slowly began to awaken to the sound of chatter and laughter outside of the music room. After some time, the noise began to fade. Then I slowly sat up, yawned and, hesitantly, opened my eyes. My eyes quickly adjusted to the light, and as I looked around, I realized someone had been in here. Whoever it was had given me a blanket and a very comfy pillow. At first I thought it could have been Hikaru. But then I remembered. He doesn't love me and I doubt he would do anything like this for me. I got up off the rather uncomfortable couch and I thought to myself, I wonder who could have done this..It was very kind of them to go out of their way and give these to me. I smiled faintly and walked around the room and thought, I wonder what time it is. I searched around for a clock but there was none in the room. I let out a soft sigh and said,
"I'll just have to go check outside of the room and maybe I can get out of the school without seeing Hikaru... Or pray I don't run into him."
On the inside, I actually wanted to see him and confront him to see where I messed up, but I didn't know how things would go, so I planned to avoid him as best as I could. I slowly made my way to the door, hesitantly opened it to find the hallways empty. I sighed in relief, knowing that everyone was in class. Including Hikaru. I wondered around the empty halls and realized I was walking towards my class. As I approached the door I thought, Do I really want to see his face? The one that broke my heart... Caused me pain...? I let out a soft sigh, trying to push aside my feelings and I looked through the small window on the door. Almost instantly I saw him. He looked as happy as he normally did and some tears fell and I said softly, That shows he doesn't care. What he did doesn't affect him... At all. I watched him laugh and smile for about a minute or two then Haruhi noticed me. She looked at me then said something to Hikaru and almost instantly he turned around and looked at me. His eyes instantly widened and he rushed to the door. I was already running away from the door in tears as I thought, He was having so much fun with her... I should just let them be... Even if it hurts.
At that moment...all I could do was run.
Annnnnd End of first chapter! Was it good bad terrible..or what?
Review pleasee! :]
May add more later..but the later chapters are in the works..
