Cross my Heart
Chapter 1 –
'I hold it true,
whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to
have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all'
Alfred Lord Tennyson's poem In Memoriam:27, 1850.
"Like seriously, I think I would never get a single chance to talk to him ever!" I poured out my frustrations and longings to Kate through the phone.
"Why don't YOU make the FIRST move to talk to him?" she suggested for the millionth time. I rolled my eyes rigorously thankful that she could not see my reaction. I firmly believe that women should not make the first move as it just did not seem fair.
"No! Over my dead body would I ever make the first move. Imagine how embarrassing it would be if he gave me a weird do-I-know-you kind of stare. Besides, word will get around and everyone in school will know and I'm so going to be despised for the rest of my pathetic life!"
"Well, get OVER him then and stop bringing him up all the time!" Kate retorts in utter frustration like she does all the time. We have been the closest of friends since we were seven and only she knew about my dark and horrible secret. I made her swear not to tell anyone but in spite of that, I refused to tell her his name and that was what really bugged her.
School started off in the usual way the next day. I made extra effort to wake myself up early in the morning in hope that I could meet him on the bus or see him at the bus stop. This was really foolish of me and I know that I might just be wasting my time on foolish games like this. Unlike Cinderella and Snow White, I do NOT have a Fairy Godmother or seven dwarfs to help me find my true love—Him.
I have never felt this way about anyone else in my life before and it really annoyed me. However, I do have perfect reasons to admire him; he is the model student; a school basketball player, a member of the faculty committee and the chairperson of his class. I knew his name. I knew what bus he took. I knew what bag he carried, what shoes he wore and I even knew his identification number! As much as I would like to deny it, my crush had developed into something more than that and this led me to a pressing issue- should I at least make the tiniest effort to get to know him?
