A/N

Please don't kill me for this. I know I haven't been updating anything lately, but that's because I haven't been in the mood to write for any of my fics. I wanted to start a bunch of new ones, but you know how those always turn out…hiatus. xD So I wrote a one-shot about Holly and Arty when I was extremely bored!

Yes, it's sort of lame, and the title is totally dumb, but I tried. And all the characters are completely out of character in this. I'm sowwyyy! I have never written an Artemis Fowl fic before, and I haven't read the books in like a year so I kind of forgot everything.

By the way this has slight spoilers for The Lost Colony. Hehe. And this story isn't very fluffy. It's not really even Arty x Holly until later, and it's mostly just hints, but whatever.

Anyway, on to the story! 8D

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

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The Perfect Gift

Holly's birthday was in one week. How old she was turning, Artemis had no idea. At first, he had planned to just say a quick, "Happy Birthday", but he changed his mind.

You see, Arty was planning a party for his little fairy friend. And a surprise party, no less. He had no idea why he was doing it, though. To Holly, birthdays were nothing. She probably wouldn't even enjoy it. But something just came over him, and he couldn't pass up the opportunity.

The planning was dreadful at first. But after a couple of days, Artemis had found himself actually enjoying it. He had even got everyone else in on the secret. Mulch was helping with decorations, Butler was making catering arrangements, and Juliet was planning out games and music. Foaly had sent Holly away on a fake mission for a week so they could get everything set up. The plan was to surprise Holly when she got back.

Currently, our young criminal mastermind was walking the halls with Butler at his side.

"Butler, do you think Holly will enjoy the party we're planning for her?" Artemis asked curiously. He had asked himself that very question a million times already, but he still didn't know the answer.

"I don't know, Artemis. I'm sure she will. If she doesn't appreciate the party after all the work we've put into it, I'll kill her," he replied.

Artemis chuckled a little. Butler seemed pretty irritated lately. It was probably because of all those annoying food companies he'd had to phone over the past very days. Even though Artemis knew the food wasn't a big issue, he couldn't bring himself to mention it to Butler. He'd go mad if he knew. Not only that, but Artemis found watching him to be somehow amusing.

"I don't even know how old Holly is turning. Do you have any idea?" Artemis asked his body guard.

"No clue. If you really want to know, you could try asking Foaly. He might know. And even if he doesn't, he could probably figure it out," Butler suggested.

"No, that's okay. It doesn't really matter. I was just curious." Artemis was not up for another talk with the crazed centaur. Not today, anyway.

The pair had reached the big double doors that led to the ballroom. Butler opened the doors and the two of them stepped in. The large room was far from a pleasant sight. Streamers, signs, and balloons flew astray and covered the ground. Confetti was scattered everywhere; a particularly large pile positioned under a tall ladder.

Standing on said ladder was Mulch, an empty confetti container in one hand, and a large poster being held up to the wall with the other.

"Fowl! Butler! Come 'ere and help me!" he muttered ungratefully, losing his balance slightly. Artemis and Butler maneuvered through the mess on the floor and made their way toward Mulch.

"Here, hold this," Mulch thrust the empty confetti container into Artemis' hands. "Tape please, Butler," he said. Butler sighed and gave Mulch the tape. He took it and stuck a large piece on the poster he'd been holding up.

"There!" he said. "Let's see it." Mulch stepped down from the ladder to look at the banner he'd just hung up.

"Happy 'Berthdae' Holly?" Artemis read. "You spelt birthday wrong, Mulch." Mulch frowned.

"Fine." He grabbed a black marker and climbed back up the ladder. Using the marker, he crossed out the word 'Berthdae' sloppily and climbed back down. "You happy?"

"…Happy Holly." Butler stated.

"Yep. But it makes sense. I mean, she's a generally happy person, isn't she?" said Mulch. Artemis rolled his eyes.

"Mulch, you're going to need to –"

"ARTEMIS!!!" Artemis heard his mother's voice. Butler nodded at him and he left the ballroom.

When he reached his mom's room, Artemis sighed. The twins were sitting next to his mother on her bed. He could guess what she'd called him for.

"There you are, sweetie! I need you to watch your brother and sister for a while," Mrs. Fowl said. The twins were playing with each other's hair and giggling.

"But Mum! You know I'm busy planning for Holly's birthday," he said, slightly annoyed. He still managed to sound somewhat polite when speaking, though.

"I know, dear, but can't you watch them for a few hours? If you can't, then just call Minerva." Artemis sighed and nodded.

"Alright, Mum. Thank you," he took the twins by the hand and led them into the ballroom.

--

It was the day of the party. Everything was pretty much ready for when Holly got home. Artemis had called Minerva to babysit, and afterwards she had stayed and helped Arty re-decorate the ballroom. New (correctly spelt) banners were put up, and the floor was cleaned. Foaly had told everyone exactly when Holly would be arriving at the manor. To his surprise, Artemis found himself…excited. Usually parties were not his thing. Definitely not. But something about this just made him anticipate the moment Holly walked through the door.

And yet, despite how excited he was, Artemis was also nervous. He couldn't quite figure out why; Holly was sure to enjoy everything he'd set up for her.

But maybe that was it…the fact that he'd set it up for her. And just for a stupid birthday, too.

Artemis was brought back to Earth by the sound of the door opening. Foaly must've told Holly to use the front door. Alert, he stood silently in his 'hiding spot', ready to jump out when she came in.

The door opened, and a very confused looking Holly stood in the doorway.

"Okay, Foaly, what's going on?" she asked; her hand on one hip. Artemis was counting under his breath.

3…2….1….

"SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Artemis, Butler, Juliet, Mulch, Foaly, Minerva, and even the little twins joined in on laughing at Holly and her bewildered expression.

"Hey, Happy Birthday, Holly!" Artemis smiled brightly at her. "Come on, follow me to the ballroom. I've got a surprise," he led the still-shocked Holly down the long and elaborate hallway and into the ballroom.

The whole way there, Holly was thinking, 'Surprise? Artemis hates surprises!'

She gasped when she saw the transformation. The lights, the walls, the music, the cake….it was all so amazing! She spun to face Artemis, her face lit up in excitement.

"Artemis, did you do all this for me?" she asked. Artemis shrugged.

"Well….yes. But I had help," he said.

"But…you hate parties!!!" she exclaimed, still trying to figure out what possessed Artemis to do what he'd done.

"Well, yeah, but you deserve something special once in a while," he said. "I – " Holly interrupted him by pulling him into an tight and unexpected hug. Artemis was taken aback, but hugged her back anyway.

"Thank you. This is the best birthday I've had in my entire life!" When she pulled away, Artemis saw that she was blushing a little.

"Uhh…you're welcome?" he said, laughing. He was glad Holly liked his party.

"Come on, let's go get some cake!" Holly chirped. She grabbed Arty's arm and pulled him towards the enormous, yummy-looking cake.

"Wow, this is really good! Who made it?" Holly asked after taking a huge bite out of her slice. Artemis was about to answer when Juliet came up behind them.

"I did!" she said, spinning around as she sat down next to Artemis and Holly. "Happy Birthday, Holly!" she proclaimed. Juliet took out a large plastic crown and stuck it on Holly's head.

"Juliet! What is this?" she asked, fingering the letters engraved on the crown.

"It's a birthday tiara!" Juliet said ecstatically. Holly laughed.

"Well, it's uncomfortable," she said as she pulled the crown down off her head. "Thanks, though," she added.

"Oh, I see how it is. Of course Arty's party is the perfect gift, but not my cheap, plastic crown that I borrowed from his little sister!" Juliet said jokingly. Holly laughed.

"Here, you can wear it, Arty!" Holly took the crown and placed it atop Artemis' soft ebony hair. "Now you're the birthday girl!"

As annoyed as he normally would've been, Artemis laughed along anyway. He was having a good time here with Holly.

As he pulled the sparkly crown off his head, Artemis knew that the party he'd planned really was the perfect gift.

THE END

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A/N:

Yeah, kinda lame, I know. xD I was bored! So, everybody is completely out of character…especially Holly and Juliet, I think. Holly is never that giggly or nice, and Juliet isn't that girly. xD But oh well!

I didn't mention Minerva much, because the truth is, I HATE HER. Ahem. And I didn't say much about the twins because I couldn't think of names for them!

I don't remember if Juliet cooks, or if she's bad at cooking. I know it's one of the two. If she sucks at cooking, oh well…I guess she can bake cakes…xD

Anyway hope you enjoyed this! Please review! Thanks!

-Kyllex