Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

A/N: Just a funny little story, meant to make you laugh. Enjoy!

Chapter one: Movie Theater.

Bella was bored. She made a huge mistake but was too stubborn to admit it. She would sit through her horrible movie selection, in the terribly dodgy theater she was in, and finish that stupid European movie. She turned her head to look at her friend Alice, She was fast asleep. If she were to wake her up right now to walk out of this movie- she would never hear the end of it. Her best course of action was to sit through the torture and then brag about having seen this movie to her 'pretentious crowd'. A few moments passed and Bella was finding herself fall asleep. She sighed. Her phone suddenly vibrated and the screen flashed- One unread message. It was an unknown number.

Unknown: I know who you are. I will make you cry.

Bella looked passively at the text and shrugged her shoulders before messaging back: Ok. Good luck with that, I don't cry.

Unknown: You will when you see my face. You should be scared.

Bella: …. I think you crossed off the element of surprise there, buddy.

Unknown: No- I am outside, watching you through your window.

Bella: I think you got the wrong person. Maybe you should re-evaluate this whole stalker career thing.

Unknown: You think?

Bella: Yep, you suck.

Unknown: …Harsh.

Bella: You're the one who was trying to terrorize me, badly might I add.

Unknown: It's all I know. I live in the shadows.

Bella: Trying to sound cool?

Unknown: Is it working?

Bella: No, you can't go back to 'cool' once you've crossed over to 'creepy'.

Unknown: You're horrible!

Bella: You're a disappointing stalker.

Unknown: You're just like my mother….

Bella: A stalker with mother issues. You're piling on the clichés aren't you?

Unknown: You're name is next on my note pad.

Bella: Note pad, really? –laughs-

Unknown: You're name is next on my Iphone list.

Bella: Just don't scratch it off with a real pen.

Unknown: Duly noted. So, where are you?

Bella: Why don't you track me down using your 'Note pad'.

Unknown: Ha-ha. You're not funny.

Bella: Hit a nerve? What, going to cry?

Unknown: You're so mean!

Bella: If you'd done your job properly I'd be the one crying. You didn't. You're my Bitch now.

Unknown: Cut me some slack…

Bella: Why?

Unknown: This was intended for the girl brushing her hair in the room.

Bella: Well then, maybe you shouldn't have dialed the wrong number and plagued the wrong person.

Unknown:- I was nervous.

Bella: Of course, coming out of the criminal closet is nerve wracking-or so I hear.

Unknown: Maybe you can help me?

Bella: Become a criminal? No, thank you. You're a lost cause anyway.

Unknown: Ok, fine, this was meant to be a prank. I like the girl and I thought this'll make me stand out.

Bella: Maybe in an AA meeting while sharing stories about hitting rock bottom.

Unknown: Are you done making fun of me?

Bella: Oh sweetie…I haven't even started.

Unknown: Ok, fine, whatever.

Bella: I'll help on one condition.

Unknown: What?

Bella: You stop watching scream.

Unknown: -Gasp- but how did you know.

Bella: Really? At least Ghost face had the decency to call.

Unknown: … I will stop watching scream.

Bella: It's for your own good. Now go home before you get arrested for trespassing.

Unknown: How can I reach you?

Bella:… I can see we have a lot of work cut out for us.

Unknown: Oh- haha- oops silly me.

Bella: That makes me think: You might just be in the wrong closet…

Unknown: Goodnight, mysterious stranger.

Bella: …..

Unknown: What?

Bella: That's utterly lame.

Unknown: But it works in movies!

Bella: In the 40's. It also became a cliché then too.

Unknown: …..

Bella: I'll give you a piece of advice: Always one word answers- when possible.

Unknown: Goodnight.

Bella: Much Better-Later.

Bella smirked at her phone screen and elbowed her friend in the ribs to wake her up. The credits of the movie were rolling and it was time to leave that theater and never go back. It was a terrible evening all together, but one good thing did come out of it, Bella's own personal bitch.