Disclaimer: Ladida, Naruto-chan and company are not ours!

Apples of Love
Coke and Soi

Love: a temporary insanity, curable by marriage.

-Ambrose Bierce

"Apple, check. Knife, check. Book of Wedding Myths, check. Am I missing anything?"

"No," sighed Ino, rolling her eyes.

Sakura took a deep breath, swiping a strand of hair out of her eyes, and shot one last look of uncertainty towards her friend. "Okay!" she burst, "Here we go!"

Ino stuck up a sarcastic thumbs-up, and turned away, muttering under her breath about how childish Sakura was being. "Such stupidity… I can't believe my own friend…"

Holding the apple in one hand, with the knife in the other, Sakura began peeling the fruit in painstakingly slow motions. Her brow furrowed in concentration, she tightened her grip on the handle to insure that the peel would not break too early.

"Oh my god! Will you get on with it?!"

There was sudden silence with the blade jerking abruptly to a stop in mid-slice, as Sakura's head snapped in Ino's direction so quickly that one could almost hear the crick form in her neck. "Damn! You almost broke it!"

"I broke it?!"

Ino was left ignored, and Sakura turned her full attention back to her slothful task.

"I can't believe I'm here watching you do this," Ino ranted on. "This is so, oh my god, so much like those mush-brained idiots you hang out with! Like Naruto, for instance! And of course, Leetoo! It's really rubbing off on you, Sakura, I'm mean—the Apple-peel myth? How can you possible believe that throwing that damned thing over your shoulder will tell you who you're supposed to marry? Stupid, Sakura, it's stupid—"

"AHA!" Sakura's cry of triumph drowned out the rest of Ino's words, as she raised the curling apple peel up in the air. "It's done!"

"Finally!"

Next, Sakura posed herself with the red skin in her right hand over her left shoulder with her eyes closed. Very slowly, dramatically, she tossed it over and immediately spun on her heels to see the result.

"…"

"…that's an 'E', isn't it?"

Sakura was livid. "'S', Ino, it's an 'S'. Look at the curve. And that! IT'S AN 'S'! WHAT OTHER LETTER DO YOU KNOW HAS TWO CURVES, HUH?"

"Hmm," Ino teased, smiling at last, "E'… the first initial of your future husband, then. Well that rules out Sasuke—"

"Shut up! It's an 'S'!"

"'E'… Eh… What name starts with…Eh…Ehhh…Ebisu?"

"Oh gross! Hell no! I am marrying Sasuke! So therefore the man I marry must—be—Sasuke!!"

Ino laughed, and handed Sakura the Book of Wedding Myths.

Sakura tore through the pages of her photo album in a frenzy, the pages threatening to rip apart at her fierce movements. "Sasuke…Sasuke…Sasuke...Sasuke…" she muttered frantically, her hands just a blur as they flew past each picture with impossible speed.

"Hurry it up, would you?" Ino impatiently snapped, "Why can't we just go shopping? This isn't really the best way to spend your time, especially when you don't even have a dress! Sasuke already got his tux last month."

"Okay, okay! Just let me do this last one. It has to be him this time. Our fate must be together." At this, Sakura quickly glanced up from the pages to give her friend, and Maid of Honor, a look of wild-eyed determination.

She finally stopped her search when she reached the last picture of the album—the perfect portrait of her dear fiancé, Sasuke-kun, who had turned just in time for the camera to catch his swishing ebony locks and sparkling onyx pools of midnight passion.

"Oh dear God, you have lost it."

"Huh?" A startled Sakura seemed to regain sanity, although her expression was still slightly crazed. "Did I say that out loud?"

"I can't believe you…midnight passion…what the heck…"

Ignoring Ino for the umpteenth time that day, Sakura focused back on the task at hand. She skillfully tied a thread to her mother's simple gold ring, and tied the opposite end to her finger. "Alright, so I just hold it in front of Sasuke-kun, and it's good if it moves in a circle."

For the sake of her delirious friend, the blonde flipped open the book to find the paragraph on the Ring Myth, and repeated the verse. "So, if it moves in a circle, it means you two will successfully marry and live a life of bliss. But, if it moves back and forth, your marriage will be doomed." Ino paused, "No pressure or anything."

Sakura visibly paled at the possibility, and swallowed hard. Steadily, she lifted the finger with the ring and held it before the photograph of her beautiful Sasuke-kun and breathed silent plea that this myth would work better than the others. If this one doesn't work…

There was a moment of dramatic silence when even Ino leaned forward in anticipation. They waited for the slightest of movements, watching the thin gold band intently.

The ring did not move.

"…What the hell does that mean!?"

Sighing, Ino dug back through the Book of Myths—"It means…you're likely to stay single for…forever."

"…"

One could almost see the twig in Sakura's mind snap, and abruptly, Sakura jerked her wrist so that the ring fell into an even circular motion.

"Hey! That's cheating!"

"I don't care! God dammit, what's wrong with these stupid myths?!"

I have spread my dreams beneath your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
- W.B. Yeats

The Wedding Day…

"Hey dobe, have you seen Sakura? I can't find her anywhere," Sasuke demanded as he approached the blonde at the refreshment table. His towering lean figure was dressed in the finest tux available for money in the village; he needed to look the best for the most important day of his life. It was made of the most expensive material, guaranteed to turn heads. Not that he needed a piece of clothing to do that for him. His slim, handsome face and sleek dark hair were complimented nicely by the soft midnight blue fabric.

"Why do you need to find her?" Naruto asked with his mouth full.

"The ceremony should have started by now…but she hasn't shown up," Sasuke said irritably. "It's been an hour since the guests arrived and the coordinator is panicking."

"Uhh…I thought I saw her—somewhere over there…maybe…" Naruto promptly turned back to the refreshment table, and stuffed his face with gourmet cheese puffs.

Sasuke turned around, rolling his eyes. "Thanks…" For nothing, you idiot.

"No prob, teme."

The groom of the day stomped off in slight frustration in search of his bride. He stalked moodily past the guests as they made their way into the fenced garden to their arranged seats, and inwardly grimaced at all the floral decorations. The wedding arch itself was pushing his limits, with all the overly done pinks and whites of huge blossoms that intertwined with the weaving ivy leaves of its structure.

Quickly sweeping over the many heads in the garden, he realized that Sakura's hair would have stood out immediately if she was there. Where is she?

I haven't checked the bathrooms yet…Maybe she's there…

Heading towards the bathrooms, Sasuke heard Tsunade's voice boom over the noise of the party, "Why is this taking so long?! Bring out the booze already, dammit!"

Sakura fell against the marble sink for support, head dangling and body slumping. A defeated sigh was the only sound in the bathroom. "Ugh…"

She gloomily raised her head to check her reflection. Her white, silk bride's gown was horribly wrinkled by now, and she had dark shadows under her eyes. She had not slept for the past two nights, the results of her failed myth tests flashing through her mind nonstop. According to the Book, Sasuke was not the one for her.

Her head drooped further down, until the shriveled, unwashed ends of her short hair touched the bowl of the sink. Just the thought of it brought her depression down another notch.

Another uneasy mumble slithered out of her lips, "Ahh…What do I do now…?"

How was she supposed to face everyone and get married to her beloved while knowing they weren't meant to be? Her usual bright and beautiful face was filled with the anxiety and doubt that had been building since the first myth she tested.

Could she be selfish and get married anyway? Or was she just leading both Sasuke and herself into a lifetime of doom?

But I want him…

I love him…

"Ugh…" In abrupt aggravation, Sakura slammed her head down onto the rim of the sink, and let the ringing pain in her head soothe her. As an afterthought, she added weakly, "Ow…"

Feeling the distress intensify inside her, she imagined walking down the aisle, and her hands began to tremble.

"I don't understand why life is so mean to me! Why!?" she burst out, "What did I ever do? I obey my parents, I never spoke out against teachers, I did well in anything and everything anyone ever, ever threw at me, and I take freaking shit from everyonewith a stupid grin plastered on my face like a freaking idiot! What did I ever do?! Huh? HUH? I swear, ask anyone, what—did—I—do?!"

She stopped for a breath, and clutched her head angrily, letting her pink strands fall onto her face as she shook, seething. "Answer me!"

"…Nothing. You didn't do anything."

Eyes wide, her head flung up and she locked gaze with the 'onyx pools of midnight passion' in the mirror.

"AH!" Sakura whirled around with a screech, horrified at seeing her fiancé leaning against the wall behind her. "How long have you been there!?"

"Long enough," he smirked, staring her up and down and taking in her rough, but stunning appearance. "What have you been doing in here this whole time? Ranting like an idiot?"

"Uhh…" Sakura's mind went blank. "Well, I thought that maybe—"

His smug expression faded as he realized just how anguished Sakura really was. "What's wrong with you?"

"I…I don't know. Maybe…ahh, I really don't know. I mean…the apples, the ring…I don't know what to do!"

"Huh?"

Sakura pushed herself off the sink and began pacing around the small bathroom. "Sasuke…"

"Aa?"

"We should stop the wedding."

"What?!" A flicker of surprise and hurt fluttered across his handsome face. His brows creased in concern, and he said again softly, "What?"

She hadn't stopped pacing, and now she threw her arms in the air. "I mean, well, it's obviously not meant to be! I have fought for this since I was just a kid, Sasuke, I have fought for you. It doesn't seem right. Shouldn't love, and our fate come naturally?

"What the hell are you talking about?" He blinked, now utterly confused by her behavior.

"Ahh, god no, ughh…" Sakura blabbered on. "Who are we to go against fate? We are but mere humans!"

"Sakura?"

"Sasuke, oh God, Sasuke! You know I love you, right?" she paused in her step and turned her crazed gaze to him, "But I could be ruining your future by marrying you! It's all in the Book of Myths! I saw the signs!"

Finally, he lifted off the wall and moved towards his bride stoically, and did not stop until they were an inch apart. He dropped his forehead onto her shoulder, and stepped forward to trap her in a tight, desperate embrace, burying his nose into the crook of her neck.

"Don't do this to me…" he whispered against her soft skin, breathing in her scent and just letting her presence take over his senses. It was an unbearable thought…not ever being able to hold her like this again. "Don't leave me too…"

Too

"…Sasuke-kun…" Sakura pressed her cheek against the top of his head, silken raven locks tickling her nose. "...I'm so sorry…I was just…no, I wasn't thinking…"

In response, Sasuke tightened his hold around her, falling deeper into her.

"I'm so stupid. The Book doesn't matter. It's just a stupid book written by stupid losers who probably never have had a real relationship! We're nothing like them, we don't need to worry! We don't need a stupid apple peel to tell us if we're compatible or not! Right?"

"…Right?" she repeated, this time using her hands to raise his head. Bumping foreheads, he was forced to meet her strong gaze. He didn't need to answer; a mutual agreement had already been reached.

Voice hoarse with emotion, he whispered one last time: "You won't leave me…?"

They melted into a sweet, chaste kiss, and let their minds shut down and leave nothing but their feelings to drive their actions. Before Sakura let herself drift away into a thoughtless haze of passion as their kiss deepened, she was able to reassure Sasuke of one last thing.

"…I won't."

Two souls with but a single thought,
Two heart that beat as one.
- Franz Joseph von Munch-Bellinghausen

The guests rose from their seats as the couple entered the garden, whistling and catcalling as Sasuke suddenly swept Sakura off her feet to carry her bridal-style to the alter. No one dared to comment on their wrinkled clothes and ruffled hair.

As they reached the alter, cherry blossom petals floated down from the sky, and everyone looked up to see Lee and Gai perched on an overhanging branch of a tree, dropping the petals from a basket. At long last, after years of struggles and hardships, they were getting married.

"Finally! They're here!" Naruto yelled at them as they settled under the wedding arch. He paused a little, as though just realizing something.

"What were you guys doing in the women's bathroom anyway?"


AN: Did that go too fast? It's 4:50am here, and Coke is hungry. Uh…sorry, that's not an excuse. We actually started this fic at our last 'sleepover' (no sleeping done), but never finished. So we made it our goal at 8:40something pm to finish it—and here we are. Ugh. Anyway, please critique and all, but not too harshly—as usual. Lalala, byebye.