Hey guys! So, I haven't been writing in a long time, and when I have, my stories have been pretty shit.
I'm not too sure about this, but I kind of like it.
And a thank you to Gabsikle for looking it over and helping me make it flow better!
Disclaimer: I don't own the BTR boys, or the song Intermission
Logan sat on the couch in his dressing room, thoughts making his head spin. He had to tell him today, he just had to. He looked up to the sound of the door opening, and Kendall walked in.
He sat down next to Logan nuzzling him and placing a chaste kiss on his lips.
When Logan didn't respond to the kiss, Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's neck.
"Mr. Henderson…" he said seductively, trailing kisses along Logan's neck.
"No, Kendall."
Kendall whined, but obliged. Logan was up next to perform the cover, he was probably just on edge.
Big Time Rush's record label had decided that they wanted one of the boys to sing a cover of a song, though the song was up to them. The best one would be recorded, and a few bridges and verses would be assigned to the rest of the group.
They sat in silence for a few minutes – not an awkward one, but there was tension in the air – when Logan's voice broke it. "Do me a favour, please." His voice cracked.
"Hmm?" Kendall's eyebrows rose questioningly.
"Pay attention to the song I'm singing, okay?"
"Sure, Logie-bear." Kendall replied, sinking back into Logan's side.
The silence came back, as neither boy tried to talk to the other. They could sit in absolute silence, and it was comfortable. The boys just worked that way, they didn't feel a need to say anything, enjoying each other's company was enough.
Kendall was completely oblivious to what was going to take place within a few minutes.
A knock came at the door, and a female voice drifted in.
"Logan, it's your turn. Go to stage 4."
"Thanks, Rachel." said Logan, as he rose from the couch and straightened his cardigan.
Kendall followed him out, and once at stage four, Kendall kissed him on the cheek and wished him good luck. Logan could only offer a weak smile in response, as he walked over to the stool and sat down.
As the music started playing, Logan took a deep breath and waited for his cue.
"Curtains open up the scene
Spotlight shines on you and me tonight."
Kendall smiled, the song must be about his and Logan's relationship. He loved the sound of his lover's beautiful voice.
"Pretending for the crowd below, we put on a damn good show
But it's a lie.
We can't help but cause a fight,
It's the same old drama every night.
I walk off stage, 'cause this whole play
Is more than I can take"
The blond gasped quietly, what was happening was slowly registering. He decided to wait until the end of the song though. There had to be a happy ending in it.
"No, I don't want it to be over
But we need a break before, you break my heart."
The brown orbs looked intensely at the green ones. They almost seemed to be apologizing.
"And oh, we can't live this scene forever
Right now you and me are better, better off apart.
But I'll still love you when the lights come up
For our intermission."
Logan bit his lip sadly as the youngest of the group looked to the floor, on the edge of running out of the room.
"I was one foot out the door
I couldn't play that part no more,
With you."
The spiky haired boy tried to avert his eyes when Kendall looked back up at him.
"The chemistry just wasn't there
I couldn't act like I didn't care
And I do, I do."
'What went wrong?' was like a broken record playing in Kendall's mind. The rest of the song went by, and he didn't hear any of it. His mind, body and soul were consumed with that one sentence. Once the song came to an end, his eyes were glazed with tears. Before Kendall was going to leave, he slipped one look back at the brunette, who mouthed an apology.
Kendall shook his head, and took large steps all the way to his room, not caring about what happened next. Logan broke up with him. He loved – no, still loves Logan. How could he just leave him, and not even have the decency to talk to him about it?
"Fuck everything." He said, as he threw himself on to the couch.
"Kendall?" came Logan's voice, partly muffled through the door.
"What"
"Open the door."
"No. You wanted to be on a break, so we're on a break. Leave me the fuck alone now." His heart felt heavier with every word that he said.
"Kendall, please, just open the fucking door. I need to explain why."
"You did a damn good job of that in the song."
"I'm not breaking up with you, I just need a break for a while."
"Yeah, and 'it isn't you, it's me' and 'I still want to be friends' is basically what you were going to say, right?"
"You know I'm not cliché."
"Breaking up with me through a song is really cliché."
"I'm not breaking up with you, and if you'd open the fucking door, the entire set wouldn't be hearing this conversation."
Kendall sighed as he got up to open the door.
"Listen Kendall, I want to stay friends with you, for a while. I still love you, I promise you – "
"If you still fucking love me, why are we breaking up?"
"I don't even know, I just know I need some time of just being friends for a while. But, you know the saying about how love gets stronger apart or something like that? That's what I gotta do, but I still love you."
"Fine, whatever." Kendall's heart cracked as he spit out those two words, and gestured for Logan to leave.
The shorter one of the two walked out, looking at Kendall one last time before he left.
...
Big Time Rush started filming their second season. Kendall had specifically requested for him and Logan to have as few scenes together as possible, he just couldn't deal with him at the time.
It didn't matter anyway. When they were in any scenes anymore, the beautiful feeling of best friends wasn't there. It just wasn't the same. The fans would be disappointed in the lack of emotion in both the boys, and frankly, Scott knew they needed time apart anyway.
Since they had fewer scenes together, and due to their "break", the lingering touches stopped. The subtle-but-not-really looks stopped. Kendall's constant arm around Logan's shoulder stopped. It all just stopped. They were friends. Friends don't share looks of love, friends don't long to touch each other. Friends were just friends.
Kendall and Logan only hung out in groups. Their constant texting came to an end, and they slowly slipped into acquaintances.
Season two dragged on. Kendall and Logan enjoyed spending time with the other boys, and their other friends. Though they still missed each other, they became individuals again.
Logan went on a few dates, but couldn't find anyone who he could laugh with, and be best friends with while dating them.
Kendall went on one date, which turned into a relationship. They became a couple, but as soon as they became too serious, Kendall apologized and said that he couldn't. They broke up, and never spoke again.
Kendall and Logan were always there for each other though. When Kendall and his boyfriend broke up, Logan comforted him, even though it just made it worse having Logan there.
"I miss him." said Kendall, referring to the boyfriend he had just broken up with, Carter.
"How'd you guys break up?"
"We were moving too fast, I just couldn't handle it."
"Why don't you ask him to just slow down? You guys can get back together that way!" said Logan, though every word killed him. He didn't want Kendall to date. Kendall was his, despite the fact that Logan had been the one to break it off. Sure, it didn't make much sense, but love is strange.
"Why the fuck do you want us to get back together so bad?" mumbled Kendall under his breath
"What?" said Logan
"Nothing, I didn't say anything."
A few minutes went by without either of them saying anything. They just thought about each other, and where it went wrong. Logan wasn't sorry for his decision though, it helped him realise how much exactly how much he wanted, no, needed Kendall around. He needed Kendall's touch, feel, he wanted to feel the warmth of one of their hugs.
And it's not just that Logan was lonely. He wanted Kendall, and only Kendall.
"Thanks for helping" said Kendall, his voice dripping with sarcasm as he got up to leave.
"Wait, Kendall. I'm sorry, I'm here, so say whatever you need to get off your chest."
"Really?"
"Yes, just get it off of your chest."
"No, you're not here for me. If you were there all along, I wouldn't have this pain in my chest right now. Carter's heart is broken, and so is mine, and it's fucking because of you."
"I'm sorry, I just-" Logan began, placing his hand on Kendall's back.
"You what? You just what? Don't bother finishing the sentence. Don't bother talking to me again. If you haven't noticed, people who used to date normally don't talk after. Sure, because of the show and the band we have to talk, but only when we have to will we talk. We are done, so stop pretending like we aren't."
"Can we start all over?" said Logan, moving closer to Kendall, placing a hand on his arm.
"No, we really can't."
As Kendall left, Logan said "I miss you."
Kendall just grunted and left.
It didn't last long though, they started talking again slowly. The tension faded, and they became friends again.
When either boy was down, the other was there for him.
At the end of shooting the last scene in an episode, Kendall went to his dressing room to gather his stuff, and head home for the weekend. He would spend some time with his friends again, maybe go swimming.
As he picked up his bag, he noticed someone from the corner of his eye, leaning against the wall in the doorway.
"Hey" said Logan.
"Hi" replied Kendall. "You need a ride home?" he asked.
"Kinda. Can I stay over at your place today? Mine's being fumigated." A dirty lie by Logan, but he couldn't stand being away from Kendall any longer, even if he had been the one to end it earlier.
Kendall nodded slowly. They hadn't been to each other's house since before the break up. Logan coming back might bring back too many memories, and just make everything worse again.
After a silent drive, they got to Kendall's house.
At Kendall's, Logan walked in and plopped himself on Kendall's couch, lying down. He heard the other's footsteps recede, and then a few minutes later felt a pair of clothes hit him in the face.
"Wear that" Kendall said, going back to his own room.
"Thanks, man." said Logan, looking at the pair of pyjamas that Kendall had given him. They seemed familiar, when it finally hit him. This used to be Logan's pyjamas, but he gave them to Kendall a year ago, when they were still dating and Kendall had spent the night at Logan's.
A pang went through Logan's chest. He missed Kendall too much. He didn't want the break to continue. He had wanted the break to be over ages ago, he just couldn't bring himself to tell Kendall. He was ready to start the relationship, but fear shot through him when he realised Kendall was probably over him.
Kendall, in his own room, had already changed into his pyjamas, and was watching some TV, when he was hit in the face with something soft and fluffy. He picked up the pillow, and threw it back in the direction it came from, laughing.
Logan smiled. He hadn't made Kendall laugh in over a year. He threw the pillow back, aiming for the German's face again, but just missing it and hitting his stomach instead. Kendall smirked, taking up the challenge.
He grabbed the pillow off of his bed, and chucked both of them at Logan, then rolled off the side of the bed when Logan started to throw them back. They chased each other around the house, waking up a few of Kendall's pets in the process.
Logan took one of the pillows and hit Kendall over the head with it repeatedly, and Kendall did the same to Logan.
"OOF" Kendall said, as he tripped and landed on the floor, Logan on top of him. They burst out laughing, helping each other up.
"I haven't had fun like that in a while" Logan said, breathlessly.
"Neither have I" replied Kendall, also panting.
Logan bit his lip, looking into Kendall's eyes. "I've missed you."
"How do I know you won't just go on a 'break' again?"
"I needed that year apart. I got to see what else is out there, and truthfully, there really wasn't anyone else out there for me."
"Oh, so you wanted someone better, but since you couldn't find that one, you settled for me?"
"Fuck no! I just needed that time to realise how much I needed you in my life, and I needed the time just to be 'Logan' again, not to be 'Logan and Kendall'. "
"But Logan, how do I know that ten years from now, you won't want to be 'Logan' again, and leave me as hurt as last time?" Kendall said to the floor.
Logan lifted Kendall's chin, and looked straight into his eyes.
"I still loved you, when we were apart. I loved you when we were together. I'll always love you, and I want to be with you for the rest of my life, Kindle."
Kendall smiled at the Texan accent of Logan. He really did miss that.
Logan reached up to kiss Kendall, and through the kiss, Kendall knew. He knew that Logan wasn't lying, that he really did want to be with him.
Logan kissed desperately, wanting to show Kendall all the feelings that he had for him, so he would know that he truly did care and adore him. He wanted to spend forever with Kendall.
They pulled apart once air was needed, and rested their foreheads together.
"I missed you" Kendall whispered, as he wrapped his arms around Logan's neck.
"I missed you too" said Logan, snaking his arms around his lover's waist.
"Does this call for makeup sex?"
"You sex crazed monkey" said Logan, chuckling.
"Only for you" said Kendall, as Logan dragged him off to the bedroom.
I hope you enjoyed this, lovely readers! Reviewing would really make my day.
