Pairing: Reid X Hotch pre-existing/very very heavily implied (Reid-centric)
Contains: Mention of rape and violence, Twilight-bashing.
Word Count: 785
My first One Shot for Criminal Minds :D Enjoy, and don't forget to review! ^_^
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The case had been a big strain on them all – it always was, when there were children involved. Spencer glanced around the jet, not surprised to find no one was sleeping. An hour before take off was enough to allow everyone to stay awake, but no where near enough to erase the look of exhaustion across their faces. JJ and Emily appeared to be playing cards, even though neither had made a move for the past 10 minutes. Rossi was flicking through a book, but his eyes were not on the pages, and Morgan stared blankly ahead as he listened to his music – no doubt trying to remove the images of scalped 10 year olds from his mind. Hotch was making coffee whilst on the phone to Jack, and Spencer silently revelled in the sound of his soft chuckle as he wished his son goodnight. The atmosphere was tense and, once again, silent as soon as Hotch had finished his phone conversation. Glancing down at the final page of the book he had been reading, Spencer quickly finished and frowned as he dropped the object onto the table.
"This should be a BAU case." He stated, causing all eyes to be drawn to him, and Morgan to slip his headphones down from his ears.
"Seriously, Reid!" Rossi stared incredulously "We just finished one case, and you're already thinking about another one?"
"It's a serious matter!" Morgan sighed before stating
"I think you need some Vacation time, Reid."
"What's vacation time?" Out of the corner of his eye, Spencer could have sworn he saw Hotch smirk at this. "Besides, this is just criminal! It goes against the very nature of literature! It's… it's… it's…"
"Literature? Wait, what are we talking about again? A case involving literature?" JJ didn't bother to hide her confusion, whereas Morgan just looked exasperated.
"Yeah, what are we talking about?"
"Thesaurus Rape!" Spencer exclaimed, causing the 5 pairs of eyes that rested upon him to stare in a moment of puzzled silence, which Emily was the first to break.
"… Thesaurus… rape?" Spencer nodded, his face betraying nothing but a kind of offended seriousness towards this alleged 'crime'.
"When authors use unnecessarily long or obscure words when a more common word would have been the obvious choice, or would have made more sense. It gives the impression that the author felt they needed to sound more intellectual and looked the common word up in the thesaurus, assuming that all the words listed are interchangeable which reflects an ignorance of the nuances of language." Rossi blinked, about to retort before Reid continued "This insanely pointless book is the perfect example!" He cried, waving his (borrowed!) copy of Twilight in the air.
"Kid-" Morgan attempted to cut him off
"Not only does it not make sense, have no plot and contains countless pointless references to 'Edward Cullen's' nonexistent 'beauty', but you'd think an authour would have the intelligence to realise that not all synonyms will fit into the same sentence-"
"Pretty Boy-"
"Like, 'Neither of us were what you would call verbose.' She meant talkative. Verbose is out of place because it implies the very kind of pretentious wording that Bella is invoking!"
"I mean, what did the thesaurus ever do to them? Its purpose has been abused! And-"
"Reid!"
"Yes?" Morgan relaxed, having finally stopped the genius' rant and claimed his attention.
"Isn't that exactly what you do?" said genius looked affronted
"I do not! I-"
"Yeah, Reid, you kinda do." Emily grinned. Pouting, the young brunette looked to JJ and Rossi for help. Rossi shrugged with a small smirk, and the blonde smiled apologetically.
"Sorry, Spence." Spencer slunk down in his seat, and silence fell back upon the jet. The tension, however, was gone, and replaced with a more comfortable, companionable silence.
Aaron, who had been watching the scene with vague amusement, saw clearly the intentions of his teams youngest member and, based on how JJ and Emily were now playing snack food poker, Morgan was nodding his head in time with his music, and Rossi was actually reading the book in his hands, Spencer had succeeded, even if it had been at his own expense… shaking his head, Aaron sat next to the brunette, setting down two cups of coffee before laying his hand on Spencers thigh with an appreciative smile. The younger of the pair smiled back, placing his own hand over that of the other.
"Hang on a sec!" Everyone's gaze turned to Morgan as said male pulled down his headphones and turned in his seat, a look of pure shock painted across his face.
"What?" Hotch asked, hiding his concern well
"Did Spencer Reid just tell a joke!"
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Spencer: I do NOT 'Thesaurus Rape'!
RoseLaurel: We know, dearest, we know. *Pat Spencer on the head*
Thesaurus Rape is wrong!
I found the little statistics on Twilight found in the link below funny :D Check it out ^_^
otahyoni. livejournal 130432. html
Please review! I want to hear what you think :D
