Love and Life
Disclaimer: I wish I owned Underworld and it's characters. I would probably be a lot happier and richer. Unfortunately I don't own either the idea or the characters from Underworld. I just like making up stories with them. Enjoy!
Michael was concerned.
Granted, he did not have a lot of knowledge on the subject of vampires. He knew only what he had been told by Selene.
He knew that they required a blood source daily, providing a minimum of one litre.
He knew also what could happen if a vampire did not receive their daily requirement. They would go into a state called blood lust, a state of near insanity that would see a vampire killing those closest to them in their need to feed.
And if no blood could be sourced they would go into a blood coma. The vampire would become unconscious, unresponsive until a blood supply was provided. The coma would last only hours before the vampire would die; no heartbeat, no breath. And in many cases, this state of death was irreversible.
Selene had been feeding daily, their blood supply still going strong, despite having lived off it for eighteen months.
Their luck after the underworld collapse had been secured in Selene's business sense decades earlier. She had purchased an apartment block, converting the top four floors into her own personal safe house. She had kept the place a secret, her hideaway from the hypocrisy of the coven. One level she used as her own condo, a modestly furnished area that she had used to escape from the death dealer world. The next two levels were set up as storage facilities, containing Ziodex blood supplies and necessary weapons.
The third, and most impressive of all, was her own personal training space. The walls had been soundproofed, meaning that she could fire as many rounds as possible into the metal targets she had set up on her private shooting range without disturbing the surrounding residents. She also had a personal collection of punching bags and all the necessary accessories.
Being six hundred years old, knowledge was not the only thing she was wealthy in. Viktor had provided her with ample funds over the years, which she had saved fastidiously. Nobody could trace her; nothing was listed under any of her known aliases.
They quite literally had everything they needed. Especially now that she could tolerate sunlight. Anything they required, she could quite easily walk into a store and purchase. In a country where cloud cover was a regular occurrence, nobody ever questioned her pallor.
In theory, everything was perfect; the war that had raged on Selene's doorstep for centuries was so much further away while they were hidden. Nobody knew who or where they were.
But still, Michael was concerned.
It wasn't their overall circumstances that concerned him. He was comfortable with where they were; both physically and in terms of their relationship.
It was Selene that was concerning him.
She was weak, so weak that she had left the bed only a few times in a week. Her feedings occurred twice daily. That was a lot of energy required to sustain someone who was moving so little. It did not seem natural.
But that was only the start of the issues.
For the past two days, she had been unable to tolerate blood. The scent nauseated her, and the two instances when she had been able to feed, the blood had not hit her stomach before she was bringing it back up.
Michael had studied medicine; he was a med student when his immortal life had begun. He knew how to operate on someone, knew how to take care of them post-operatively. He was on his way to becoming a surgeon. He knew things.
But when it came to Selene, he felt utterly clueless.
She was unable to help. The soulful brown eyes that he had been drawn in by were replaced now by glowing ice blue orbs. He was familiar with this colour: it was the same colour her eyes turned when she was excessively angry, the same colour her eyes were when they made love, the same colour as when she was weakened.
And now, she was weakened.
"I don't know what's happening to me," she confided, those crystalline eyes glazing with tears as she clung to him.
"It could be a delayed reaction to the blood of Corvinus," he suggested, returning her hold with soft strokes of her back.
She shook her head. "If it was, I'd lose my immunity to the sunlight." To prove her point, she lifted her arm into the rays of light that shone through their window. Her pale skin was alight, but not aflame.
"This is something else." She closed her eyes, resting her head against his chest. "I've never felt this weak before. I feel almost human."
He kissed the top of her head. "I wish I could make it go away. I hate seeing you like this."
Almost as if on cue, she rolled away from him, bent over the side of the bed. Michael then heard the telltale sound of her vomiting.
He was thankful that he had placed a bucket by the bedside.
He moved across the bed, stroking her back and shoulders as mouthful upon mouthful of partially digested blood erupted from her. He held her as the sounds of gagging slowly turned into sounds of sobbing, and gradually pulled her back onto the bed.
"You're getting worse." Michael said the words more to himself than to Selene, concern creasing his face as he held her.
Her hands were wrapped around her stomach, her head once more resting on his chest.
They sat in silence.
It had occurred to him previously, but he had never spoken it out loud.
"Selene," Michael began with a hint of hesitation in his voice. "You couldn't be pregnant, could you?"
Selene stiffened in his arms. "What?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper.
Michael took her shoulders in his hands, raising her to meet his eyes. "Could you be pregnant?"
She frowned and blinked at him. "I don't know." She stammered slightly with the words. "Vampires can in some circumstances. No death dealer ever fell pregnant. I've never seen it happen."
"But you're not a death dealer any more. You're different. Maybe Corvinus' blood and being with me has-" He was searching for the right words. "Made you more fertile."
She seemed to consider it for a moment. "It's possible. I never paid much attention to immortal anatomy."
Michael swallowed, trying not to get ahead of himself. If Selene was pregnant, it meant a simple answer to their problem. Simple, but magical. They would become parents, she would have their baby. Just thinking about it made Michael excited.
But of course, there was the downside. If Selene was pregnant, it meant that her symptoms could continue for a lot longer; up to nine months of her being completely bedridden and miserable.
And then again, if she weren't pregnant, they were back at square one, Selene's condition deteriorating daily with no explanation.
They still needed to know one way or another.
"We could take a home test," he suggested, keeping his unexpressed feelings out of his voice as best he could. "It can't hurt."
She nodded. "I'll take the test. I'd rather know either way."
Even as a med student, as someone who had studied medicine for over six years, Michael never knew there were so many varieties of pregnancy test. There was an entire section of the pharmacy dedicated to suspected expecting parents, and Michael felt at a loss as he stood before them all.
Selene was not strong enough to make the journey. Even if she had been, with her eyes glowing the way they were, she was likely to arouse suspicion walking down the street. Not to mention dealing with humans.
So it was he who now sought out the ultimate package. There were tests that showed up with a plus for positive and a minus for negative; tests that changed colour depending on the result; tests that showed a certain number of lines. Best of all was the one that simply showed up 'negative' or 'positive'. Straight forward, no questioning the result.
After many second, third, and forth thoughts, Michael chose that test and made his way to the counter.
Almost as if fate had planned it, in front of him at the cashier was a mother attempting to gain control over her four children, all who appeared under the age of six. She pushed a pram that held a screaming baby. Attached to the pram's handles was the parent's end of a child harness. The harnessed child was somewhere toward the back of the store, the only clue being the harness link that was stretched to maximum length. One boy was sitting on the floor near the counter, pulling down whatever his small hands could reach. The final child, seemingly the eldest, was talking up to her mother at the same time that her mother was talking to the cashier.
Perhaps a normal man would panic given the situation; screaming, out of control children and a seemingly frazzled mother at the end of her fraying tether.
And Michael possibly beginning the journey of fatherhood for the first time.
But all he could do as he watched the scene of chaos was smile. He had never seriously considered fatherhood as a part of his life. After the death of his fiancé, life lost most of its meaning, and part of him doubted whether he would ever be happy again.
That was before Selene. She was completely different to anyone he'd met in his lifetime, and not because she was immortal. There was a determination in her spirit that appealed to him. He had seen her as aggressive at first, but had clung to her like a lifeline when she was his only contact in the crazy immortal world.
That contact had built, developed into something stronger. He loved Selene in every possible way. If there was a child, it would be the most wonderful thing that could happen for the two of them. Especially now with the war seeming so far away, they had nothing but their lives together to look forward to.
Michael was still smiling as the stressed mother led her heard away, reeling in the harnessed child like a stubborn fish.
The woman behind the counter only just managed to suppress a laugh when she scanned through the pregnancy test.
"I'll bet you're thinking twice about using protection now, right?" she asked.
Two minutes can be an eternity when you're waiting for something important.
For Selene, whose lifetime had spanned longer than six generations, two minutes was normally little more than a blink of an eye.
But the two minutes she sat on the bed beside Michael waiting for the result of her pregnancy test seemed like ten years. She couldn't take her eyes off the white stick, sitting on the table by the bed. She also could think of nothing but the result, and how it would change their lives.
Of course there would be the obvious reaction: joy, pure and unbridled. After centuries without a family, she would be starting her own. She would love the child, there was no doubt. She would be happy as a mother.
But then there were the doubts, the questions. In coming to her hideaway, they had left the war behind. She could never be sure whether it was gone for good. Would it suddenly return to haunt her? How could they raise a child in a world where not even their safety was ensured?
And if she wasn't pregnant…
That thought brought with it even more dread. If the test was negative, she was still left with the ultimate question. She was sick, getting worse every day, with no known reason.
She hoped that she was pregnant, if for no other reason than to explain her illness. But whether she would accept the result straight away remained to be seen.
The warmth of Michael's arm wrapping around her shoulders brought her back to the present, back to watching the stick like a ticking bomb.
"This is going to sound cliché, I know," he began. "But whatever the result is, we'll handle it together. You're not alone." After a short silence he sighed. "Actually, that was two clichés."
In response to his short, uncomfortable laugh, she gave half a smile.
"But I mean it." The laugher was gone from his voice now, replaced by a severe honesty. "I know I haven't said it before, but I love you. I'm not about to go anywhere. There's nowhere else I'd want to be, even if I was mortal. I love you."
She faced him, seeing the sincerity in his eyes. He moved in, both his arms wrapping around her in a warm, comforting hug. She returned the hold, touched by his sentiment and his care.
When they pulled away, she kissed him, soft, but with all the passion that her words just couldn't express. All of the thanks she couldn't give him, she poured into that kiss. He looked surprised when they parted once more.
Taking a deep breath, Michael looked down at his watch. "It's been two minutes."
Selene swallowed, nodded silently. She realised that she was holding his hands in hers, holding them tightly. She found she could not let go, could not move from her position on the bed.
Michael seemed to realise this. "Do you want me to check it?" he asked, giving her hands a squeeze.
She nodded.
Reluctantly, she released her hold on one of his hands while he reached away from her. She watched intently as he picked the stick up, not looking at the indicator until he was sitting back before her.
He searched her face momentarily before looking down, turning the stick over to reveal the result.
His face showed no reaction; it was as if carved out of stone. She tried unsuccessfully to meet his eyes, trying to read something, anything from him. But he would give nothing away.
"Michael?" she asked after several moments' worth of silence. The tone of her voice surprised her: she sounded so firm, so demanding. The complete opposite of how she felt.
His eyes rose to hers, still inscrutable.
"Is it negative?" she pressed, her hold on him tightening further with each passing second.
Meeting her eyes, his head began to move slightly, infinitesimally.
First to the left, then to the right, then back again.
He was shaking his head.
No.
No, it wasn't negative.
"It's positive?" She was hardly able to manage the words.
Michael's nod was more noticeable. "It's positive," he said softly. "You're pregnant."
Those words hung in the air for several seconds unacknowledged. Selene was breathing in, taking deep breaths as letter by letter sunk into her mind.
You're pregnant.
"I can't be!" she exclaimed, releasing his hands and standing from the bed. "I can't be pregnant! I'm six hundred and twenty three years old! It's not possible."
Michael held his hands out, placating her. "Just calm d-"
"I can't have a baby! I'm not a mother. Mother's have babies. I kill people. I don't give life, I take it away."
"Selene, that's not-"
"How can I? How can I have a baby? How can I raise a child like this?"
"We, Selene. We'll raise it to-"
"Not like this. Not in this war. No!" she shook her head. "This isn't happening."
Michael was standing before her, his hands raised hesitantly to take her shoulders, not yet touching. "It is happening."
"It can't." She looked into his eyes through a haze of what she realised was tears. "Don't you understand? This can't happen."
"Why not?" His fingers were still inches from touching her, but she could feel the warmth of them.
"I've been a killer for most of my life. How can I be a mother?"
"You can be a mother." Michael's voice was a contrast to hers. "You can love, you can care for someone. You can teach."
"How can I keep a child safe, Michael?" This, the ultimate issue. "Any day someone could break down our door and threaten to kill us. I can't even guarantee our safety. To bring a child into this…" She shook her head as she trailed off.
"We have everything we need here, Selene. If someone came through that door we would have enough artillery to fight them off a thousand times over. You've seen to that; you saw to that years ago, before any of this."
"What kind of environment is this to bring a baby into?" she whispered.
Michael's strength on the topic seemed to waiver then. She saw briefly what she thought was a look of regret, maybe even disappointment. As soon as she saw it, the glimmer faded, replaced instead by a barrier.
He was trying to stop her from seeing his hurt.
"Who better than you to raise a child, Selene?" he asked, his voice not quite as firm as before. Now he seemed to be almost pleading with her. "You have more than enough life experience. Like I said, you're caring, you can provide ample time and love and protection for a baby. We don't know whether the war will return, but what happens if it doesn't and we miss this chance?"
That question made her stop and think. It was valid, as much as she expected someone to find them eventually.
"We may not have another chance," Michael continued, one of his hands now resting on her shoulder. "I'm not going to force you into anything. I don't want you to go through with this if it's not something you're happy about. I'm just asking for you to consider-"
His words were cut off again. This time muffled by her mouth as she kissed him, firmly, passionately. Her arms wrapped around his neck and after a stunned moment his wrapped around her waist.
In that moment she realised something that her mind had not allowed her to see. When they broke apart many, many minutes later, she shared it with him.
"I do love you, Michael," she said, her earnest eyes bearing into his. "I want this baby, and I want to share this with you."
"Are you sure?" he asked, his arms still wrapped tightly around her. "I only want you to be happy."
"I am happy. And this will only make me happier."
They kissed again for several long minutes.
When they released, Selene frowned.
"What is it?" Michael asked.
She glanced briefly around them before answering.
"We're going to need to redecorate."
