This fanwork contains references to the use of alcohol and to certain mature situations. Viewer discretion is advised.


Where the Wild Things Are
Chapter One: A Conflict of Interest


Cana really did love Mirajane Strauss dearly — the older woman was the big sister she'd never had, and Mirajane, in turn, saw her as another darling younger sibling (albeit a bit idiosyncratic, when put politely, much like the rest of their fellow guild mates). Indeed, Cana couldn't count the number of times Mirajane had been there for her when she'd needed a shoulder to lean on, and words didn't even begin to describe how much Cana appreciated everything the older woman had ever done for her. They were family, after all. They were nakama.

Yet even so, these two young ladies had their spats and their differences, as all siblings did, and as Cana looked unhappily at the two men sitting before her in one of Crocus's most chic coffee shops, Cana resolved to personally see to it that Mirajane paid dearly for what she'd done.

Also, Cana really needed a stiff drink. Immediately.

She was abruptly torn from her murderous thoughts by yet another yelp of excitement from the blond man sitting to Cana's right. "So cool!" Jason exclaimed. "I can't believe this is really happening, they're just too cool — two of the strongest mages and heaviest drinkers in Fiore who can drink anyone dumb enough to challenge them under the table! How cool — !"

A loud bark of amused laughter from Cana's left interrupted the reporter. "Almost anyone," said Bacchus Groh, the ace of Quattro Cerberus, and in an attempt to improve her mood, he grinned knowingly at Cana. "But in Nee-chan's defense, it's always close — it's enough to get my soul shaking just thinking about it!" His grin widened; Cana was not amused.

"I told you to stop calling me that," she muttered to him darkly before turning to face Jason properly. "Besides, you lost a couple of times, too." The reporter was bouncing excitedly in his seat, looking eagerly between the two like a child in a sweets store as he did so, and while she normally found Jason's enthusiasm flatteringly endearing, Cana now found that it was all she could do to not roll her eyes at him, and she had Mirajane and Bacchus and a severe lack of alcohol to thank for that. "Is this interview done yet? I'm a very busy woman, you know." Truthfully, she wasn't, relatively speaking, but at that moment Cana was willing to do or say anything she could to get away from Bacchus and his stupidly attractive face and ridiculously sculpted body and —

Oh, yes, she definitely had to leave. And perhaps figure out a way to deal with Mirajane in a way that wasn't entirely illegal, once she got back to Magnolia, as well.

"I just have a few more questions for you if it's alright," Jason replied, "and then there's the photo shoot for the magazine after that, but Mirajane probably told you all about it already. She's just too cool, isn't she?" He continued to babble on about how "cool" the eldest Strauss sibling was, and while Bacchus seemed to be listening to the reporter with at least a vague sort of interest, Cana most certainly wasn't.

A photo shoot. With Bacchus. Cana wasn't sure whether she wanted to end Mirajane immediately or torture her for as long as possible upon returning to the guild, but as far as Cana was concerned, revenge was most certainly in order: it was bad enough that Mirajane had so conveniently forgotten to mention that she'd be interviewed alongside Bacchus when she first asked Cana to fill in as her replacement instead ("I already promised Lisanna and Elfman I'd go on a mission with them before Sorcerer Weekly asked me for the interview, and I know for a fact that an interview with Gildarts Clive's only child would make headlines!") but the fact that she'd just as easily left out the part about doing a photo shoot with the Palm Mage from Quattro Cerberus was just inhumane.

But Cana was willing to let it go — they were nakama, after all, and for all her power and strength, Mirajane was human, too, albeit one whose personality could be demonically twisted at times. Besides, there was still one rather large detail about the entire situation that hadn't been brought up by anyone yet, for which Cana was extremely grateful. She trusted the older woman enough to keep it a secret, and so with a sigh of resignation Cana leaned back in her seat and looked pointedly at Jason, who was still rambling on about how cool Fairy Tail (and to a slightly lesser extent, Quattro Cerberus) was.

"Alright," she told the reporter. "Let's get this over with — what do you want to know?" Out of the corner of her eye, Cana saw Bacchus shift into a more comfortable position beside her, and she fought the urge to turn and stare in awe at those delicious muscles in motion. She had a point to make, and a reputation to maintain.

Jason's expression grew minutely more serious. "Cool, cool, cool!" he exclaimed yet again as he turned to face Cana directly, pen poised above his notepad in anticipation. "Cana, this question is for you."

"Alright. Shoot." Cana took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down; all the interviews and photo shoots with Sorcerer Weekly she'd had in the past had been fine (even if they only served to ruin Fairy Tail's reputation even more) and even if she had been conned into being interviewed alongside Bacchus, it really wasn't that bad at all. Even if she didn't care to admit exactly why that was.

"Our readers want to know: how long have you liked Bacchus? And when did you decide to date him?" The reporter looked at her expectantly, and when she didn't respond, his expression turned to one of confusion, and then fear upon catching a glimpse of the murderous gleam in her eyes. "Cana?" Bacchus, to his credit, had the decency to look away and remain silent, despite the flush coloring his face — Cana knew it was for her sake, Bacchus wasn't the sort of man to do that for just anyone — and if she hadn't been so mortified and embarrassed by the situation she would have thought that a blushing Bacchus was actually really adorable.

"I'm going to kill her," Cana said in a low voice to nobody in particular. "Mirajane Strauss is a dead woman."

And then Cana willingly severed the frayed threads holding the remains of her patience together, and officially lost it.


A/N: And so I finally joined the Fairy Tail fanfiction bandwagon by going back to my previous style of writing relatively short chapters — I'm really excited for the way this particular story will eventually play out (especially since I already have the next two chapters mostly written and edited) especially since I have a few other unrelated Baccana pieces I'm working on as well (I've recently discovered that I really love this pairing quite a bit), so. Yes! Hopefully it will be alright.

That being said, feedback and reviews of any kind at all are always appreciated; thank you for reading this first chapter! Also, my apologies for how lame these notes are; not only do I not have much to say at the moment, since this is only the first chapter of the fic, but it's also late, here, and I am utterly braindead and exhausted. So, yes. Heh.