The Truth Behind The Showgirl
Her heart was breaking. She could feel it splintering into a thousand pieces inside her chest. The rain outside echoed her mood, desolate. The Speak Easy was quiet now; nobody dared go near her, not even Sam.
She missed him. She missed his smile, his way of talking, the way he was so adorably dumb. He was hers and she was his and everyone saw it. She was trapped here, in this counterfeit impersonation of a once happy place, the walls were as suffocating as Sam's hold on her. The large Italian's ever watchful gaze never left her body as she shakily rose from the table and walked outside into the rain. She had to get away. The memories were killing her. Without him the Speak Easy seemed lifeless.
Her shattering heart lead her forwards through the downpour. Her hair was plastered to her face and she wiped away a strand as it flicked into her line of vision. She couldn't see where she was going, the rain was obscuring her eyesight. Her feet lead her onwards as she stumbled through the bare cobbled streets until she could feel the softness of mud underneath her. The grass was slick and she faltered twice before reaching her destination. As she crouched next to the rough stone she began to sob. Nobody could hear her now over the roaring wind and nobody could see her being weak.
The memories came flooding back to her. How he'd looked when she first met him, his suit was slightly too big so it hung awkwardly over his shoulders. She smiled fondly but that brought back another sharp painful memory. How he'd smiled at her, not like the others, not in a lustful way but a genuine smile. She'd known from that moment that she would love him forever. The way his hat had tilted forward over his eyes made her heart ache.
She remembered the time he'd irritated Sam and ended up needing ice over his eye. She had stayed by his side all night until the swelling had dispersed. She'd secretly never forgiven Sam for that but of course, as ever, had stayed dutifully by his side.
Another flash of memory, this time it was only noise, the darkness clouded her mind. She could hear them arguing, once again, but this time it seemed more serious. He was screaming at Sam, telling him to change his ways or he'd leave. She hadn't known it at the time but that fight was about her. They were always about her.
A final memory appeared in her mind. Him covered in blood and the remnants of splurge, her screaming into his chest. Sam was stood over them with a calculating look on his face. It was always about being the best, the prettiest, "The Girl" but as she lay over his cold unmoving corpse she found that none of that mattered anymore.
She broke. The fierce tigress Tallulah broke down in tears as she once again read:
Here lies Knuckles,
Devoted gang member and true friend,
A "cracking" guy who passed before his time
Constructive critiscm welcome :)
Thanks for reading
Em x
