It was… dark. Cold. Suffocating, almost. The thick air of fear could choke the life out of you if you weren't careful. Navigating Gallahand Fortress was a terrifying thing, no doubt. But I had to finish the mission. I had to finish them. All of them.
For Fiora.
…For Shulk.
Navigating this maze of metal and death, it was grueling. Terrifying. Hollow screams rang about me intermittently. The screams of my people, my Homs… now begging for their life to not be lunch. There had been times my heart and stomach begged me to just go in after them, to save them. But how could I? All I had was this bloody guarder, and – while it's one hell of a weapon – it couldn't do a scratch against them. And that left me with the cold question of how I'd even deal with this faced Mechon once I found him – found it; Idon't know anymore, really – but I resigned myself to the idea that I'd just tear it down with my bare hands.
The cacophony of screams continued like an eerie chorus – one shriek would end abruptly, and another four would take its place, chopped down themselves several intervals apart from each-other. Then again, I never expected eating Homs alive to be a coordinated bit.
The doorway came, after the gut-churning hallway of screams and pleas, opened up to an open room. And I saw it there.
Cobalt Face.
Its back was faced to me, preoccupied with something of some sort – like hell if I knew what a Mechon did in its pastime. Tentacles floating languidly around it from the protrusions on its back, claws extending from the heavy gauntlets it had for gloves, long blades on its elbows, and tail pronged in three, barbed all around. I wonder how much of it was still a person inside. I never delved deep into the idea of a Homs turned Mechon, how many parts of it were still… real, or if it was all metal at that point…
While muddling about that thought, I muddled around the more-relevant idea of a sneak attack, but let's face it: I'm a big guy. I don't sneak very well; it's never been in my nature from day one. So I figured the next-best thing was to catch it off-guard. I steeled myself for the battle ahead, took a deep breath.
For Shulk and Fiora.
I charged first, giving a battle cry to startle it, pulling out my blade second. But before I could even raise it to its apex, one of its tentacles reached out quickly and snapped up my wrist and legs, and with their magnificent force, stopped me in my tracks. But… it didn't take them. The grip was harsh and forceful, but it didn't break my bones like I know it could.
Bloody hell. I knew I'd be in for the monologue of my life. A cat toying with its mouse (and I was the mouse, sad as it was).
It didn't even look at me before its body reacted. It wasn't even shocked – startled, like I wanted it to be. It didn't even react. Instead, it took a deep sigh, a sigh of disappointment, as though I wasn't enough of a challenge. And then it spoke in a gentle voice, calm, collected… and that voice tore my heart open and filled it with rocks. "How could you ever just… attack me like this…" With a hiss, the chest cavity inside Cobalt Face opened, revealing a boy sitting there, a small smile on his face. He rose up and stepped out. "Reyn…?"
My breath hitched. My stomach tied up in all sorts of coils and twists. My heart was sinking fast. My mouth formed words but my throat couldn't bear to utter even just that one word. After a struggle to open up my voice, I could finally utter the hoarse question: "…Shulk…?"
His body was clad in thin armour, thick plates only on his stomach and chest. His joints were joined by latex, wires seen working between the steel. Around the back of his head was a visor of sorts, lights blinking and working in the same colours as the wires around his joints. "So you did miss me?" He smiled a warm and familiar smile… but everything about it felt wrong. His eyes were inviting and kind, but wrong. Just wrong – so so so wrong. They were cold. They were icy and metallic. His teeth were like daggers, sharp, but everything was fake. None of it was Shulk's, even if that head of his was the last flesh he had left. His generic smile was carbon-copied, imitated. His eyes struggled to convince me anything. His voice failed to grasp the tone only he could utilise.
He wasn't Shulk. It wasn't Shulk. My Shulk…
Beside myself in this horror and disbelief, all I could do was stare at him, examine him, try and further my denial, my… my hope that I was wrong – his eyes, nose, ears, his golden hair, his fair skin, his lips, his blue eyes – beautiful blue eyes… And although I could see everything, I could find… nothing, besides a face I used to love so dearly.
But deep down in my heart, I couldn't bear to live with that reality. Those Mechon took him from me once… I couldn't bear the thought of him being here… here again, so close – so close I could almost touch him – just for him to be a pawn, a puppet. And even if he was, I had to free him. I had to protect him. But what if I couldn't? What if there was nothing to save? A reanimated corpse mechanised for combat?
With my mind tearing itself to pieces, to my dismay, he moved closer to me, his boots clanging on the ground, his eyes looking up to lock with mine. "What's wrong, Reyn? You're usually never at this much of a loss for words."
I swallowed my tears, the rasp in my voice, the wet gasp that would make me lose it. I encased my heart in a wall of stone. "Shulk… you… you've gotta be in there somewhere…"
He laughed a little. The quick little laugh that struck chords in my heart, resonated those memories of my stupid jokes that made him laugh just like that. Memories of an easier time… That laugh just then was so believable… "I am in here, Reyn. I'm right here." He placed a hand on his breastplate. "Right now. I'm here…" His gloved hand reached up and gently brushed against my cheek, drawing down to the edge of my chin, felt-soft and plush, almost so real… "With you…"
My walls crumbled away, my voice cracking and chipped, my body shaking, tears falling down my eyes. "Shulk, oh God…" I sobbed. "What did they do to you…"
He smiled a warm smile. Each time he did, it looked more and more believable. Or maybe, I was just hopelessly desperate. His hand retracted, clad itself back within the metal, and he replaced his helmet, though he kept his face visible. "They made me better, Reyn."
"Better…?" I sniffled, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. "Shulk –"
"Yes, better. I only had one other person in the world to save me, to go with me. Damn it, Reyn, you promised you'd protect me! Right from the very start! You promised! …" He gave a sigh, a pained sigh, matched with an equally-pained expression. "And you failed. What was I left but a dead body buried six feet under? What use was I? The Heir to the Monado, dead!" He threw his arms up in the air and paced back to his Mechon. With a hand on his head, he moved the controls a little, and the tentacles released from around me, resuming their idle movements in the air. "But the Mechon had other plans for me; they've always been a flashy bunch. What better to take down Bionis than with the one hope it had?" His smile turned cold, sickening, but only for a moment. Blink, and you'd miss it. I suppose he wanted me to believe it was an act, that he was speaking as the Mechon for a moment in his narration, but there… there I saw just what they'd done to him.
He agreed with that proposal.
He sighed again, paced just a little before he spoke again. "Reyn… you were supposed to save me…"
I grimaced. Despite the darkness he'd lent himself to, his words still cut deep. I could hardly tell what was an act with him – with this one – anymore… "I am, Shulk." I assured with a voice that was very unsure. "That's why I'm here…"
His eyes flashed with anger, his heavy boot slamming into the ground with an inhuman force that left a crunch in the metal, making me jump. "I meant BEFORE! You couldn't save me in my bloody life so now you wanna salvage my corpse in death! Charging at me, guarder in hand –still in hand! Is that supposed to save me, Reyn?! Is that supposed to show how much you mourned for me?! How much you missed me?! How much… you loved me…?" His face reflected a sort of pain, a pain I resonated with (hell, I was feeling it then), eyebrows drooped, teeth clenched. He was angry – furious – and… sad.
My tears came down harder; I didn't know what to say, my mind jumbled up with guilt. I let him die. I didn't do enough… I didn't listen. His future vision had never failed before, but I just didn't listen. I had turned my head away for a second – just a second – and there he was, Monado clattered to the side… long claws… through his heart. Just like Fiora.
I COULD'VE SAVED HIM.
Never could I imagine, after the screams, after the tears, 'Don't leave me's, the blessing, the burial, the acceptance, the moving on, the moving on…! that he would be here… here again.
No… I can save him now… God gave him to me again. I can save him. I have to. "Shulk…" I started again in a voice that was a little more certain, "I can still… still save you. The Mechon played a sick joke doing this to you, but I can…! I can help you… They gave you back to me…"
His eyes narrowed at me with a sort of contempt I never imagined he could possess. "They didn't give shit back to you, Reyn. They gave everything back to me. I am theirs now – and there is nothing stopping stopping me from leaving this whole planet to waste!" He gave another mortifying smile, though blink, and you wouldn't've missed it. It stretched wide across his face, horrible, and true.
I sighed shakily. I could save him… save all of Bionis in doing so. I told myself I had to stop all of these faced Mechon, and I would. I would. Guarder, as he'd mentioned, still at hand, I pointed it mere inches from his face. "I will save you, Shulk. Even if it's not the way you think it should be." But could I really? Could I save him?
His eyes met the blade, then met my own eyes. They were wide in a sort of shock that was not scared. "I'll need my body first."
"You have it right there, on you." I motioned to the blue plates and black latex now covering him in his entirety.
He pointed his thumb behind him, to the Mechon, a crazed sort of smile, looking all kinds of wrong, creeping across his face. "No… that body. This… This is a replacement of broken parts…" He knocked on his breastplate. "That's my body…"
I looked down at him, his expression… frightening. Not just because it was plain creepy, but because it was so… so unlike Shulk. How, so quickly before, he had seemed so much like himself – his laughter, his pain, hell, even his anger. I've seen it all in him, dealt with it all, sometimes only needing just one hand. But this… this look, this bloodlust, this… insanity… It wasn't him. It was what they did to him. What they wanted in him, forced on him.
And I knew then. If I could shake the Mechon's hold on him, I could save him. I could save Shulk. He was in there, there when he was hurt, when he was angry, confused, betrayed. But those eerie flashes in between, and now this… this was the clear line between them. Between my Shulk and theirs. And I needed to free him of it.
Shulk –" But before I could even begin, I felt a break in my elbow. Before I could even see it in my arm, I felt it in my arm, and saw it in his eyes, no longer a bright blue, but a metallic cobalt. I dropped my guarder as he pulled his arm away from the force he'd dealt enough to break it, backing up behind him and returning to his… his body, his laugh that was no longer familiar echoing across the walls, loud and maniacal.
The hub closed in front of him, and I couldn't see him anymore, the Mechon's arm reaching out as I cringed and picking me up with its large hand. "Reyn… you still mean so much to me… it seems like such a shame."
"No…" I whispered, more out of the instinctual fear than to live up the drama. "Shulk… Shulk, you don't wanna do this… Please…" I gripped the gauntlet with the one arm I could use, its iron grip not making my broken arm feel any better.
He gave another chuckle, more subdued this time, but not by much. "Y'know, I think there's a way we can work this out…"
"Not in anyway while you're acting like a lunatic…!" I looked into the only eyes I could – the blue eyes of Cobalt Face, devoid of life and emotion, hoping, in some way, that talking to it would connect to him.. "Shulk… Shulk please… Pull yourself together! You're better than this…!"
"I'm so flattered, Reyn."
"Please… God, please… Shulk…" My body gave up the fight. I couldn't worm my way out of this physically anymore. "Please… let me help you…!"
Suddenly, his grip loosened. Not quite enough for me to wriggle free, but enough so I could actually breathe. The Mechon's body slumped, heaving a sigh. "You do love me… don't you?" Shulk asked, his voice quiet. "Even now…? All this time you spent going on about how you'll save me and free me, and help me… But… you came here with your weapon, pointed it at me even after we… we talked. Do you… love me…? Like this?"
My heart sank. Cobalt Face might as well have never loosened its grip. Insane or not, Mechon or Homs… "Shulk… of course I still love you…" I choked out, tears never having left my face. "I love you, no matter what you are. I always have."
The Mechon turned to me more completely, as if it was trying to make a sort of eye contact with me. "I know a way… a way we still can… work us out. Even if you're a Homs and I'm… this now."
I looked at Cobalt Face – through it, into him. I didn't know what to think. But I wanted to believe. I wanted to believe he was still in there. "H-How… Shulk…?"
I felt his smile. The Mechon tilted its head to look at me. "To be inside me, Reyn…" A tentacle opened wide and lunging out at me. "FOREVER!"
And I sat right up; I didn't even know I was screaming… or how much. The whole team looked on at me, having woken them all up, except for one pair of hands securely on my shoulders. "Sh-Shulk…" I whispered, almost painfully.
He put a hand to my cheek, soft and plush… but this time, real. "Reyn…" He said gently, truly gently. "Are you okay…? Wh...What happened…?"
My hand met his on my cheek. "Thank God…"
His eyebrows knit, his voice still having a hint of sleepiness. "For what…?"
I gave a small laugh, a relieved one, and flicked a finger across his nose. "That the nightmare's not real, silly."
"It was about me…?"
"Yeah. Just be glad it was a plain ol' Reyn-brand nightmare, and not some future-telling one like yours."
He then put his hand on mine. "Yeah, I guess so… So… what did happen?"
I sighed and sat back, lacing our fingers together. "I… I had a dream that you were… you were murdered, and it was all my fault."
"But how?" He rested his free hand on his chin, listening closely.
"Well, you had seen a vision where Metal Face was going to impale you, and I was supposed to be warned to assist you. But you warned me, and I didn't listen, because I was caught up fighting some other Mechon. It only took a second to smash them, but… and that's a big 'but'…"
"I was already dead…"
Although it was a dream, hearing his tone – the small hints of fear, larger chunks of confusion, concern… it hurt. "Yeah… already dead…" I put my head to his chest – a little awkward, with how we were facing each other, but I had to reassure myself. I heard the dull thud of his heart, and was satisfied with that, and a little pet to my hair. I pulled back and resumed holding his hand. "So, for some reason, I ended up being the only one heading to Gallahand Fortress, and there, I met a new faced Mechon: Cobalt Face. And he was… you. The Mechon had salvaged up your body – that we buried, mind you – and made a Mechon out of you. For some poetic irony reason or some such. You had body armour over you and everything, even outside the Mechon. Everywhere except your face."
"Because I was dead. They needed some way to reanimate me. And if not any internal organs, then at least my brain. They probably only kept my head for that use. Everything else could be metallicised."
His analytical approach to it all made me chuckle. "A-plus for you, Shulk. I guess. But it was my dream, so to Hell with logic! Anyway, you and I talked a lot and you basically killed me and ate me."
"Me or the Mechon?"
"The Mechon, dumbass."
He laughed a little – that old, familiar laugh. "Just making sure. Like you said, it's your dream, after all." His smile faded after a little while. "But Reyn… there is no Cobalt Face, as far as I know."
"I know, Shulk. There isn't." I pinched his chin between my index and thumb so he'd look at me. "And I never want there to be one. Ever." I let go. "You mean too much to Bionis for you to die like that. …" I sighed. "You mean too much to me…"
"Reyn…"
"And I want you to be more assertive, okay? Don't wait till someone's about to die to speak up."
"Okay… I promise."
"And be careful! I know this nightmare was about my own stupidity, but you have your share of mindlessness! Can't have you die over stupidness."
He rolled his eyes and sighs. "Okay, dad. Anything else?"
I laughed, but soon settled down, looking at our hands intertwined. "Shulk… I want you to know that I love you. Kid or prodigy, good or bad, Homs or Mechon – I love you with everything I have, and don't you doubt that, okay?"
"I…" He gave me a long look, then smiled and nodded. "I love you too, Reyn."
"Okay then…" I gave a sigh of relief. "Just wanted to make that clear before you go all loopy on me."
"Roger that." He reached up and kissed my cheek.
"What? No kiss on the lips?"
"Not with your breath." And as Shulk spited me there, yellow began to break on the horizon, rising up as the sun.
"Oh bloody hell… another night of no-good sleep…" I put a hand over my eyes to rub the sleep out of them.
Shulk gave my hand a squeeze. "Well, at least I'm here, right?"
I smiled, smiled a little too somberly. I kissed his cheek back and wrapped my arms around him, a hand on his chest. "Yeah… you're here." And as his heartbeat laced through my fingers, at least I had that. At least I had him, and he's all I'd ever need.
