Aren't you gone?

Yes. This cool room half lit by glow-in-the-dark trinkets and a sliver of the moon boldly flowing through my open window is empty of your presence. That used to make my chest ace in some sort of longing.now I wish that I could feel anything else but you here. Because no matter how many times I looked around this room for you, and you are not there, it still feels as though you are. Your mocking laughter may as well be echoing around the walls. It's not fair, that when you leave you never really do. This room has known long nights, where you'd enter my window and seemed to forget your mission, and I mine. As I grew mature we could almost get along, even though you never did seem to grow up. Sometimes I could tell, though, you had experience in life far surpassing mine. You could be serious.impassive, as a soldier would be.

Then sometimes you'd reveal a weakness. So rare I can still number them, there were nights we'd stay up just talking, sharing our insecurities or problems. A deep wound ran through your words, one that I found did not heal over time. Times when you would show it to me, you broke down just as badly as the last time you spoke of it. Those nights were eternal, my dear. As eternal as old wounds we will not tend to.

Wasn't I enough?

Obviously not, if I can stare out into the glaring blackness of night and tear-blurred stars, wondering why your shadows won't leave me alone and why you aren't here to accompany them. It's been a while since I spent whole nights awake fighting old nightmares.