101 ways to kill, torture and humialte Jacob Black.
My friend Hay hin rox ( that's her penname on fan fiction she is a very talented writer help me write this story many of these was her idea.
1. Demon stapler
2. give him a box of chocolate with yummy grenade centers
3. Have him "fixed"
4. Drop 10 tons of apples on him.
5. Get all the other werewolves to get super pissed at him
6. bring him to the Voultri
7. strap him to a rocket headed to the sun
8. Strap him to a rocket headed to Mars
9. super glue and duck type his feet to the sidewalk underneath the empire state building then drop a penny on him from the top
10. pour honey on him then throw 5000 red ants on him\
11. Flamethrower
12. rocket launcher
13. Have Edward drain him of blood.
14. force him in a doggy cage and drop it in a volcano
15. make Emmet bear hug him to death
16. Casually drop personal letters to Jacob from Planned parenthood about coming gin for an appointment to talk about going on the pill
17. Have Carlisle perform "surgery" on him
18. Shot nails at him with a nail gun
19. Have birdies peck out his eyes
20. Force him to watch a tellitubby marathon
21. Bring him to candy mountain just like Charlie the unicorn
22.Hang him buy his toes by a large pit of bears.
23. stuff his head in a locker
24. make him read watership down
25. Bring him to a gay strip club with Edward Cullen as the main event (a/n yes I know that would NEVER happen!)
26. have all the werewolves think about bunnies hopping peacefully in a meadow.
27. make him drink blood
28. Run him over with a train
29. Dress him up like a girl
30. Have him imprint with Sam
31. Make him kiss Emily so then Sam kills him
32. Make him wear a thong
33. Force him to listen to the entire Britney spears CD
34. make him watch Bella and Edward kiss
35. Place him in a very elaborate corn maze that he will never get out
36. SUPER glue him to a chair and force him to listen to the Wiggles CD
37. drop a 1000 ton rock on him
38. stick his head in a pickle far
39. Inject him with AIDs then malaria
40. Hide all his cloths
41. Force him to take a bubble bath, and then post pictures of it on the web
44. Give him a baby bottle in fount of his friends
45. Take him scuba diving then steal his air tank
46. Trap him in a revolving door
47. Make him listen to a audio book of the dictionary
48. Hit him with a dictionary
49. tell everyone he is emo
50. Tell everyone he has an STD
51. Tell everyone he has the BIGGEST crush on Justin Timberlake
52. Strangle him with a public bag
53. Superglue a teddy bear to his head, a pink teddy bear with sparkles and pretty purple ponies
54. Push him in a pool of maxi pads
54. Stick his head in a bee hive
55. Push him in a pool of maple syrup
56. Repeatedly kick him in the private area
57. Superglue fake fangs to his mouth
58. Superglue Edward to him
59. Pretend to kill Bella but make it so he thinks Bella is dead
60. superglue a thong to his butt
61. Dress him up like Jessica Simpson in his sleep and take a picture and post it on myspace
62. Have him pour water on a kitty …you know what happens next
63. Get a tattoo on him that says " I love Barney" On his forehead (a/n you know the big purple dinosaur"
64. Smother tampons with maple syrup and throw them on the back of his shirt when he is not paying attention.
65. Hide all his money in a box of tampons
66. Hack into his email and talk about how much he loves Nick Jonas and how it sucks that he couldn't het back stage tickets to the concert
67. Force him in a halter top and mini shirt then take him to the mall where all the popular people go.
68. Change his ringtone to Hannah Montana's Nobodys perfect
69. atomic bomb
70. Put hair removal cream in his shampoo
72. Place blue dye in his showerhead so when he showers he will become blue
73. Drip hot sauce in his mouth while he is asleep
74. make him watch big bunny
75. Feed him baby food
75. Force him to watch Edward and Bella do-it after their wedding
76. place itching powder on his toilet paper
77. Hit him mover the head with a titanium enhanced chair
78. Instead of the silent treatment give him the talk until I wanna commit suicide treatment
79. Have Billy give him the talk
80. Put vinegar in his drink
81. Put pheromones in his washing detergent (a/n 100 my friends idea, I don't know what that is)
82. When he turns werewolf dumb hair removal cream on him
83. Put a collar on him that has his name address etc on it
84. Post posters of kittens in his room
85. Push him off a cliff
86. Drown him in hot cocoa
87. Shave off his eyebrows.
88. super glue high heels to his feet.
89. Bring him bowling and put super glue in the holes of the bowing ball
90. Force him to cook
91. Force him to wear a bikini
92. Superglue him to Sam
93. Spread rumor the he likes to bake
94. paint his toenails pink with sparkles
95. Kick him in the head
96. Cut his private area off bake it into a pie then force him to eat it (a/n I did not make this one!! My friend did!)
97. Slit his wrists then post picture up saying he is emo.
98. make him listen to Bella singing the song "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" over and over
99.pluck all his eyelashes
100. wax his eyebrows and "accidentally" take them both off
101. Post this whole list on the web which we already did! \
There 101 ways, do you want me to keep writing more lists or do you want me to make other chapter but with other character from twilight getting humiated ? Drop a review.
