Disclaimer: I do not own Captain America, Star Trek, or anything about any of the wars. These products belong to their original owners. I just fanfic.

Okay, so the thing that is upsetting Steve the most is that every time Steve's fought in a war HYDRA has been looming in the background. World War II: Start of HYDRA, Loki: Assistance from SHIELD that was already starting the production of HYDRA weaponry, Ultron: HYDRA supporters, That Almost Civil War: Mutant Registration Act apparently started by a HYDRA operative in hopes of "humanity willingly giving up freedom". And now this, a Eugenics War started in response to the Almost Civil War, and turning it into what would surely be called WWIII. Oh, great, Steve's now lived through three World Wars when Earth had all come to the collective agreement that these wars were bad and should be kept far apart, and here lays Steve with Bucky somewhere near him, two men alive for all of them.

Steve's maybe a little bitter. He thinks it might not be as bad if he wasn't so tired of all of this fighting. Actually, that's a lie. Steve can't imagine he wouldn't be bitter about all of this, at the sheer amount of destruction wrought on innocents, and that even after everything he's seen happen he still believes humanity will continue to wage wars. He's resigned himself to it, Steve isn't about to become another ULTRON.

It brings him to his next point, though, because the other most upsetting thing is that Steve knows he can also be directly traced as the cause of the Eugenics War. Captain America is one of the first publicly known cases of human genetic enhancement, and he also started the spur of scientist across the globe enhancing other humans to try and recreate the Supersoldier Serum. Then, people started to succeed in creating some kind of enhancement and it became a scientific field of study. With that, also came more public awareness in Mutants, and the start of Charles Xavier's school, and all of a sudden people became more and more aware of how many enhanced humans there were on Earth. Then, as if the situation wasn't already fragile enough, the Earth finds out there are also aliens in the world, and they were declaring war. Finally came the icing on the whole cake: SHIELD (HYDRA) had actually been experimenting with Steve's unconscious body before all the aliens happened, and had successfully created 100 other supersoldiers in three years. Even better, SHIELD had told Steve that they were other humans experimented on and rescued, choosing to fight with SHIELD, and had Steve lead them. Those very same soldiers also chose to fight with him when the fight over the Registration Act began much to his eternal confusion, and they stayed behind him when the Eugenics War broke out after their existence was discovered and the rest of the world decided to take personal affect.

Now here Steve sits, behind jail cell bars, awaiting punishment for his war crimes. The Supreme Court had decided he was the leader of the enhanced/mutant rebellion (which was technically true) and as such, was now a proven criminal in the eyes of the law. He would leave for the final hearing would be in a couple of minutes, where the jury will finally decide on his innocence and he would find out his sentence. If found guilty, Steve only hoped that he would receive a quick death. He's lived too long, he thinks, he can feel the weight of all of his years, both in the ice and outside of it, resting on his shoulders, as well as the guilt of the war he knows he caused.

A clanging sounds from the other side of the cell. Steve looks up to see there is someone on the other side of the cell. He starts to stand, thinking it's his guard, come to take him to the court room, but the person on the other side holds out their hand to make him stop. Steve pauses, and takes a better look at the person on the other side. They're wearing the white and blue uniform of a prison guard, but, Steve notes, it looks more ill-fitting on this person than the normal uniform. The cloth is too small, stretching out at the shoulders and torso, the pants a little too high and a strand of long dark hair managed to escape from the "guard's" cap. Steve knows who it is instantly.

"Bucky," he asks, "why did you come here?"

Bucky steps a little closer to the cell and now Steve can see his face clearly from beneath the cap. He looks worn-out and tired, even more so than usual, and his shoulders are slouched in a way that lets Steve know he's feeling guilty about something.

"I wanted to say a final goodbye while I still got the chance," Bucky replies gruffly.

Steve sighs, "We don't know for sure what's gonna happen, Buck."

Bucky scoffs in reply. "Then I'm just covering my bases. Chances are you're going to get some kind of conviction, and then they're going after me and all the other people who fought with us. Even if you do walk away, I don't think I'll get another chance to talk to you for a long while. Might as well get it over with now."

Bucky is glaring at Steve as well, daring the captain to try and challenge the truth of his words. Steve doesn't, he knows Bucky is right, but he doesn't like needing to admit that. It makes it seem like he's well and truly lost this fight, and Bucky as well. But if this is to be the final time either of them here from each other, he's sure as hell going to make it as pleasant as possible.

"Fine," he relents, "but if we're gonna do this, then there's one thing I need you to know right now. Whatever happens today, it was my choice to start this fight, and I was well aware of all of the risks I was taking. I don't regret fighting for you- never have, never will- you are my best guy and you will always be worth it. If this really is our final goodbye, I need you to always remember that, you had my 6 Before and I got yours now. 'Til the end of the line."

Bucky nods. "I never wanted any of this to happen to you. You deserved so much more happiness than you've gotten and I'll never forgive myself for being part of the cause of that- no, don't butt in. You found me, tried your best to save me, and fought for me and I'll always be grateful for that. I know you don't regret it, Steve, but I regret putting you in this position. I absolutely hate that I'm part of the reason you're behind bars, and it'll absolutely destroy me if you die. I'll be watching the trial, and if you are going to die, I'm turning myself in. Don't you dare try to stop me, I deserve it."

With nothing else he can do, Steve only nods and accepts it. Bucky moves closer to hold out his flesh arm and Steve reaches through the bars to grip it at the forearm. Bucky returns the gesture, and they hold the position for a few seconds before Bucky pulls away again, disappearing from view within seconds.

Steve hears the sound of boots approaching and resigns himself to whatever fate awaits him in the courtroom.

He never finds out what it is because as Steve is walking up the stairs to the courtroom, he catches a glimpse of blonde hair glint in the sun and suddenly Sharon Carter is standing in his line of sight. She's wearing her CIA uniform, and Steve has just enough time to see her raise a gun before he hears a shot go off and the world goes black.


He feels awareness creep into him and he is so, so, cold.


Steve wakes up lying down on some sort of bed. It feels wrong, and he is struck with a sense of de ja vu. Steve groans and tries to sit up, but a hand on his shoulder stops him. He looks up to see a middle-aged man in a mesh blue long shirt over a black undershirt.

"Take it easy, you've been unconscious for a long time," the man tells him.

Something about that strikes fear in Steve's chest and he feels dizzy and unbalanced, even though he's lying flat on his back. He doesn't know why, but it suddenly feels imperative he find out just how long he's been unconscious.

Steve tries to voice his question, but his mouth is dry and making any sort of movement in his mouth feels like someone took a roll of tape, unrolled it in his mouth, and then went to town tearing it off. The man seems to know what Steve wants, though, and gives Steve a small pat on the shoulder that does absolutely nothing to abate the growing fear in Steve's stomach.

"There's no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to go for it," he says not unkindly. "We found you in the wreckage of a ship near Delta Vega. You were the only one we found, contained in a cryotube, which is the only reason you survived. I'm sorry, but we have no idea what happened to the rest of your crew."

Steve frowns. None of that seems right. He doesn't know what this man is talking about. The man seems to know what Steve is thinking again, and Steve can't help but think that the man must be a mind reader.

"What's the last thing you remember?" He asks.

Steve opens his mouth to respond, but closes it again as he realizes he doesn't know. When he tries to think back, he draws up a blank except for maybe snippets of something. He can't actually recall what. Maybe blonde hair?

Now he can't stop freaking out, and Steve runs a hand through his hair, seriously freaking out. He wants to get up, needs to move, but something holds him back. An instinct in the back of his mind that tells him he doesn't want to know what he'll find if he tries to leave. A pained whimper of panic escapes his throat, and the grating of his throat that accompanies the sound.

The man pats Steve on the shoulder yet again, possibly trying to soothe him, but Steve doesn't feel anything.

"It'll be okay," the man tries to reassure, "we're heading to the nearest Star Fleet outpost that can take you to Earth as soon as possible, you'll be able to find out everything you need to know soon."

The words help him a little, but Steve still feels off-balance by this whole situation.

"Do you know your name?" The man asks him, suddenly. Steve feels himself frown at the randomness of it, but he finds that he does know the answer.

"Steve. Steve Rogers," he manages to croak out.

"Well, Steve Rogers, let's get you fully recovered so you can be prepared to leave."


The Star Fleet outpost they take him to lets him board a shuttle for free when his situation is explained. From there, he shows up at one of the Star Fleet medical buildings and again explains his situation. Steve goes through a couple of apparently routine tests, tells them his name, and is given a pamphlet and some sort of phone with a promise that they'll get back to him with any information they find.

Apparently getting amnesiac, newly unfrozen popsicles of a human are par for the course here. The pamphlet, he finds to his delight, is not only bigger than it looks, but also very informative.


Steve, armed with some of the necessary knowledge he needs to get by in this century, decides to enlist in Star Fleet. For some reason he can't quite name, it feels right to be a part of this facet of the future. He thinks that maybe he did something similar Before, it could match up with his memories of some sort of crash. Maybe he had been a peace worker then, or perhaps served in some kind of army. That would explain his dog tags. Either way, Steve boards a shuttle that takes him to the Academy where he receives a cadet uniform, dorm listing, a key card to be programmed, and another list of required class followed by open elections for his focus.

Steve's dorm mate is a young man of seemingly Russian descent. When Steve asks, the boy tells Steve that he is 13 and is named "Chekov, Pavlov Andres" and that he's studying advanced physics so that he may one be a ship navigator. Looking at all of the different tomes and various study materials the boy owns, Steve decides he won't question it. He's still in that hazy state of mind where he has trouble finding something that fazes him enough to actually voice a reaction. There's so many things Steve doesn't know anything about, it feels stupid to even consider questioning someone else's competence. Instead, Steve introduces himself and admits that he's still considering all of his options.

"Really? Do you at least have a general idea what you want?" Chekov questions, sounding genuinely concerned.

Steve feels the familiar rush of embarrassment run through him as he looks down at the ground. "Um, kind of? I was considering either security or culture. Is it bad I haven't chosen anything yet?"

"No, no, nothing wrong with that. It's just that classes fill up quickly, so you might want to decide soon," Chekov explains. There's no trace of mocking or incredulity towards Steve in his voice and body language. Steve appreciates it, and decides in that moment that he likes Chekov.

"Oh, right. Hadn't considered that, thank you," Steve tells him earnestly. "Do you happen to know where I can enroll?"

"Sure, I'll take you there," Chekov tells him. He hops off his bunk, and Steve moves to follow him. They walk through the doors and Chekov leads Steve through the labyrinth of dorm rooms until they reach a giant set of doors at the front of the building. They push one open and enter a main pavilion of sorts. There are signs hung up at different areas, denoting the subject each area covers. Various students mill around, occasionally stopping at a table to press something on the screen and then move on. This must be the main enrollment area.

"Thank you," Steve tells the Russian boy once again. Steve's already moving down the set of steps that lead to the pavilion from their building. Chekov is still standing near Steve, so apparently he also needs to do some enrolling.

"It's no problem, I forgot about an extra elective I wanted to enroll in anyway," Chekov replies, confirming Steve's belief. They both make their way to the center of the pavilion, where Chekov crosses over to a section reading 'ASTROPHYSICS' and Steve turns to find something for either one of his interests. He spots a sign declaring sports and combat training, and makes his way over. There is a large range of things he can choose from, and he feels compelled to go over to the hand-to-hand booth and add his name to the roster for a time slot he knows won't conflict with any of his mandatory classes. On an impulse, he also adds some sort of sport where the athlete throws around a flat metal disc and tries to hit as many trajectory points as possible within a room. He doesn't know what makes him do it, but the strange game seems familiar and Steve can't quite ignore that feeling enough to walk away from anything that triggers it.

Steve walks through the entire section, and doesn't see anything else that catches his eye. He knows he still has about two other slots he can fill and still keep up with whatever course load he receives and any research he'll need to conduct to get by. So, letting impulse guide him once again, Steve walks around the pavilion to see the other classes. That's when he gets completely side-tracked by the liberal arts section. There's an art history booth that has set up a slide-show of contemporary art from all time-periods. Steve finds himself strangely drawn towards it and itching for something to draw with. Maybe he was an artist before? Steve signs up for the class, and also ends up promising to check out a club focused on 20th century art styles.

Steve makes his way back to his dorm smiling and confident in his decision to join Star Fleet.


Okay, so it turns out Steve really loves it at the academy. He was pleasantly surprised to find that not only did he know how to draw, but he absolutely loved to doodle when he had free time, or when he needed to focus on something other than an endless stream of words he was barely processing. And sparring- he had to hold back sometimes because he had more strength than he expected, but he loved the release of tension it gave him, and he also found out that he had a vast armada of instinct to use mixed martial arts while fighting. His first day fighting, his opponent had tried to punch him in the gut and Steve had simply moved out of the way with a speed and grace he wasn't aware he had, and flipped his opponent all the way around before pinning the poor man on the ground with Steve's knee on the other man's back and Steve's left arm keeping the man's hand and arms pinned to the man's back and sides. After, Steve had to explain his whole memory loss situation, but promised his instructor that now that he was aware, Steve would be more careful about his fighting in the future. The thing is, though, Steve only has to hold back with certain people, some of the other students in his class can either take Steve's strength, or are even stronger than him, and Steve thoroughly enjoys going all out with those people just to see who can best the other. It makes him feel great afterwards, and Steve is assured that the same goes for his sparring partners, so they all get-together outside of class every once in a while and just go at it.

Then, there are Steve's actual classes. He learns all about the history of Earth that he missed, gets to learn all kinds of things about space and Federation ships. Then, he also learns some general math and science, and has daily lectures on alien cultures and other cultural influences and it's all just so fascinating to Steve. And sure, there are some times when Steve just feels so overwhelmed with the amount of things he doesn't know, that everyone else in his class seems to know about, and Steve just wants to turn away and not deal with his frustrating lack of memory. There are days when he is awoken in a cold sweat, heart gripped by fear of something he doesn't know he fears yet still feels the weight of that fear. Sometimes he gets snippets of memories, of people from Before and he is swallowed down by the grief of the people he must have left behind who knows how many years ago, and he feels an ice-cold chill seep into his bones, heavy from the thought of how old he chronologically is. Those days, Steve will withdraw for a couple of hours, keep to himself while he tries to overcome his feelings.

Steve doesn't know how the boy knows, but Chekov can always just tell when one of these moods have settled on Steve, and sometimes he'll leave the dorm and let Steve have some quiet, alone time. Other times, Chekov will just sit down on the shared couch they bought for the dorm and pull up a holovid for an old, but popular show or movie because Chekov is just as behind on pop culture as Steve is and they'll just sit there and watch. And when the weight of everything that he's lost settles in, and Steve finds himself consumed by his grief and too tired to not show it, Chekov will make some sort of soup he said he grew up eating, and sit next to Steve's bedside and share stories of his life in Russia. Steve doesn't think he'll ever be able to repay the Russian for everything he has done for Steve. Chekov only knows that Steve had lost his memory, and that he had lost a lot of things very important to him before it happened, but he still tries his best to cheer Steve up, and Steve will always respect Chekov for that. They become very close friends because of it, and Steve values that friendship highly. So yeah, sure things aren't all good, but Steve absolutely loves his life at Star Fleet. It's the only real thing he has.


Upon Steve's second year at the academy, he changes his focus from 'Undecided' to 'Culture and Research'. He's still bunking with Chekov, neither of them willing to change dorms after becoming such good friends the year before. Chekov is 15 now, and he's already getting all sorts of acclamations from his professors, and recognition for his unique genius. Steve's proud of him, in the way an obnoxious older brother is, and insists on baking something for Chekov when the boy is promoted to advanced navigation classes a year early. Chekov is a little petulant about it, claiming that the Fleet didn't move him up higher because they didn't want someone who wasn't even technically at the legal driving age to be running a ship's navigation systems. Steve listens to him rant a little while he made strawberry tarts because anything with strawberry in it was guaranteed to make the Russian happy.

It's only after he's already finished them and Chekov is happily praising Steve's cooking skills and asking questions that Steve realizes he literally has no idea how he knows this recipe and where he got it from.

If Chekov notices the way Steve's suddenly tensed up after realizing, he doesn't mention anything about it.


Steve is about halfway through his third year in the academy, going through a minor bout of helplessness over the nightmare he kept having of a metal arm glinting in the sun before crashing down to deliver a deadly blow to his face. Every time he closes his eyes, Steve thinks he can start to form the face of the person the arm belongs to, but then it fills him with so much pain he has to take a deep breath and tries to move on, but the image won't stop bothering him.

Chekov decides to stay in the dorm, and pulls up a holovid to start playing. "Today, we go even more old school!" he announces gleefully.

Steve is sitting on their couch, cross-legged and trying to stare at anything that doesn't remind him of that damn arm. Chekov turns on the vid and flops down on their couch and shoves his head on Steve's lap, playfully kicking up a fuss until Steve starts petting the young man's hair. Chekov's hair is curly and soft, and he's let it grow a little longer than he normally would in favor of studying more so he can skip another year of training. He sighs contentedly when Steve runs his hand through the base of the curls before slowly working his way up and dislodging tangles as sensitively as he can. Chekov can hardly be bothered to brush his hair most nights, so Steve usually takes opportunities like this to try and force the Russian's hair into some sort of submission, and Chekov appreciates not needing to make a lot of effort, lazy kid, so Steve finds himself doing this often.

The vid starts up, and Steve sees what Chekov meant by old school because the film isn't even in color it's so old. The title sequence claims the film to be The Adventures of Captain America and his Howling Commandos and Steve feels a pang somewhere deep in his chest.

"Why this?" he asks, because he suddenly feels like he really needs to not watch this movie and he wants to know why.

Chekov looks up a little from his place on Steve's lap, careful not to dislodge Steve's fingers. "It's a classic, everyone tells me. Most of the Americans claim he's an actual super hero, and was a very big figure until he died in 2016."

The pang in Steve's chest grows. "How'd he die? Do you know?" he asks, quietly.

"Shot in the head, or something like that. Apparently he had been a criminal," Chekov replies dismissively. He's already focusing on the movie, trying to absorb everything happening on screen.

In the film, Captain America is talking about some sort of attack on a HYDRA base they need to perform. He's laying out the plan while pointing to various parts of a map and assigning each of the six men around him to some task. The reel cuts to a visual of the team carrying out the same plan outlined and destroying the base. After, they show a close up of Captain America talking to his team, congratulating them on a job well done. The helmet the Captain had been wearing is off now as he stares at the members of his team, and Steve knows that face because he sees it in his reflection every day. Steve tenses up at the same time Chekov voices the same conclusion they both reached.

"Hey, he looks just like you!" Chekov exclaims.

Steve's hand still in the middle of untangling some curls as he just stares at the Captain's face. The man is still talking, and maybe Steve is just trying to make this up so he has something he recognizes, but he swears Captain America's voice also sounds like his. Chekov loos up, concerned, and then panicky when he sees the look on Steve's face. Quickly he pauses the holovid and turns towards his roommate again.

"Maybe it's just coincidence?" Chekov tries. He rests a hand on Steve's arm in a hesitant show of comfort, and Steve snaps out of his daze. Steve blinks a couple of times trying to clear his mind of all the similarities he draws between him and Captain America. He can't.

"I need to go," Steve announces, shooting off the couch. He's pulling on his boots and grabbing his key card while Chekov is struggling to catch up with Steve.

"Where are we going?" Chekov asks in a forced cheerfulness.

Steve glances over, "I am going to the nearest archive and searching for everything I can on Captain America. You should probably go through that chapter on beaming a moving object you were complaining about yesterday."

"I was reading that for fun, going for ship navigator, no need to know how to beam. Besides, if this is going to help you remember something, I want to be there."

Something in Steve makes him fondly think punk, but he is again hit with a flash of that stupid metal arm and a cheeky grin forming that very same word. Steve stumbles, again overcome by a feeling of intense pain. Whoever he's trying to remember is obviously someone of great import to him and Steve feels an irrational pang of guilt at not remembering them.

He sighs and lets Chekov go with him.


Researching Captain America is a lot harder than either of them had first considered. First, because apparently the man had lived in two different centuries, two different forms of media. Steve starts in the 20th century and is hit with an avalanche of data about not only the Captain, but other projects and events directly influenced by Captain America. Chekov sits in the chair beside Steve and grabs a small reading tablet to help Steve sort through all the information. They link up the two devices and Steve sends him files for projects he thinks might be related, but do not actually involve the Captain other than by name. Then, Steve sorts through what he believes to be propaganda from fact. There is absurdly little in the actual fact list, so Steve checks through the propaganda list again and lets a few more files into the fact list.

Steve goes through and reads everything in the fact list, occasionally turning to Chekov to cross-reference some event and they make their way through. From what they gather, Captain America was the result of genetic experimentation created to serve as a better soldier during a time of great distress. They wanted him to help fight off a man named Hitler who had advanced weaponry and terrorized all of Europe. The Captain went on to lead a group of six other men they called the Howling Commandos who specialized in infiltration and intelligence gathering. They focused most of their efforts on a German science division called HYDRA, because it had apparently been more of a threat than the German armies trying to take control of the entire European continent. HYDRA created the advanced weaponry, and eventually spilt off from the rest of Germany to fulfill its own plans for world domination, led by a man who (if the articles were to be believed beyond simple propaganda) did not have a face; just a red skull. Captain America would later "die" stopping this man's plan to drop really big bombs on every major city in the United States by crashing a plane into the ocean and drowning with it.

Steve thinks about that first memory he had of the cold water rushing up to meet him while he had lain stuck behind a piece of machinery. He wonders if that was the kind of thing Captain America had gone through, crashing that plane, and shudders to think about it. He hopes not, hopes the man had been passed out when he crashed, because he wouldn't wish that experience he had on anyone.

After they get through all of the news of that century, they move on the next. Steve goes through the same process of fact from propaganda and this time he has a lot more fact. Steve isn't really surprised, it's the 21st Century, the era of Technology and Information. Everyone has easy access to the world's knowledge and can do whatever they want with it, sharing everything they know and connecting with people across the globe. Chekov and He are fully immersed in Captain America's story now, wanting to know more and the amount of data they have now makes them both happy.

Captain America survived the plane crash, his DNA is used to create a full squadron of other supersoldiers while he fights with a new group called The Avengers, who become known as superheroes after they fight off an attack in Manhattan caused by one of the member's brother. The event is named the first large-scale hostile contact with aliens, only preceded by an attack in New Mexico led by the same brother who sent down a large robot that levelled half the city. Three years later, Captain America is listed as a fugitive running from the law before he takes down the organization he works for. The early articles name him a terrorist for violently taking down objects known as helicarriers over government property. Later articles retract those statements when it becomes known that the organization, SHIELD, had been compromised by a HYDRA splinter group and the real purpose of the helicarriers became public knowledge. All of the SHIELD data files had been dumped on the internet and when Chekov goes through them, they find out a couple more things about the original supersoldier program as well as the new one. Captain America's private records are also among the data dumped, they both feel uncomfortable with looking through something that was never supposed to be made public and only check to see a picture of him (and he still looks exactly like Steve) and see if maybe he has any other family listed. It's a long shot, but maybe Steve's related to the man and that's why they share such a resemblance. Chekov also finds that the Captain's name is also Steve Rogers, they're the same height as well, and that the Captain would've been about the same biological age Steve was when he woke up at the time of his death.

Steve doesn't want to think about what that could mean, so they instead move on to the other articles. There's a couple in particular, about a man with a metal arm that the Captain fought which make Steve's blood run cold, remembering that glint of a metal arm he kept seeing in his dreams. Then, it's revealed that the metal arm man is actually Captain America's best friend Bucky Barnes, who he thought died in a train accident during one of the Commandos missions, and Steve's freaking out about all the parallels he's finding. Finally, they get to the Eugenics war and Steve watches a couple of clips of all the fighting and is more perturbed to find that he recognizes the Captain's fighting style. Then the Captain's death, shot in the head while walking up to the courtroom on his final day of hearings. He is declared dead, and the rest of the supersoldiers are placed in cryosleep and sent off into space to never be found and awoken again.

There are still more articles, though and a quick cursory glance reveals that someone else took up the mantle of being Captain America after Steve Rogers died.

When it is all read and done, Steve leans back and takes a deep breath, absorbing everything he's read and comparing it to the things he remembers from his life Before. The similarities seem too abundant to pass off as coincidence and Steve doesn't know what to do with this new information now that he knows it with a certainty.

Chekov pats him in the back in a show of comfort. "So?" He asks.

Steve shakes his head, still feeling shaken up by everything he needs to process. "I don't know. I'm not sure about anything," he says honestly.

They go back to their dorm and it's rarely ever mentioned again.


On their fourth and final year in the academy, someone decides all dorm mates should be part of the same focus and change half the student body's housing. The graduating senior class all collectively point a middle finger at Star Fleet admiralty and stay with the same person they've been living with since they arrived. Steve and Chekov are no exception.


It's Chekov's birthday. He's turning 17, which is apparently a very big deal for him but no one can really understand why. Then, Steve checks a handbook and realizes that 17 is the legal age for the operation of shuttles, and a clause also states that anyone 17 and older can hold a senior position in a starship. He remembers two years ago, when Chekov had complained that the only reason he wasn't in more advanced classes was because he wasn't of legal age yet and laughs and laughs and laughs.

He bakes a cake shaped like the Enterprise, a ship he knows Chekov wants to get on when it flies at the end of the year. It has a strawberry filling in the inside and, though no one notices, Steve had written out the clause number instead of the ship identifier on the cake and gives that piece to the birthday boy.

Then he notices that there are really only five people out to celebrate with Chekov and him, and decides that the boy works way too much. He should take them out more.


Of course, now that he has the intent in his mind, Steve can find no free time between he and Chekov's schedule long enough to actually let them go anywhere and have a good time. Then, one of his classes get cancelled, and it's a free period for Chekov so he's finally about to go do something so of course they all get called to assemble for a senior class meeting.

Then the distress call from Vulcan comes and they're all rushing to emergency stations and getting assigned to various ships so they can answer the call.

Chekov is assigned to the Enterprise. His smile is so wide it must hurt a little as he rushes to board the appropriate shuttle. Steve? Is assigned to a work station still on Earth so that he can assist in "finding out what the hell is going on". He tries not to be too disappointed that he's not going out to help and is reminded that his chosen focus rarely gets assigned to starships.

Imagine his surprise at finding out the senior linguistics officer has demanded his presence aboard the Enterprise because "they needed someone to parse through all this data while they translated". He rushes to the nearest shuttle.


Steve has a job for about two minutes before Jim Kirk rushes onto the bridge and starts yelling about how it's a trap. He's looked through the translations provided and come to the same conclusion, so when Commander Spock asks Kirk to explain his conclusion, Steve joins the group of people supporting Kirk and announces that everything they've said checks out with the data given.

Lieutenant Nyota Uhura replaces the man Steve was previously helping. He's worked with her before in class, mostly for simulations where they have to identify patterns in other planet transmissions. She's good at her job, and she certainly doesn't need Steve there, but he's not certain where else he should go.

Thankfully, Uhura sees the lost look on his face and smiles kindly. "It's alright if you stay for now. I might still need your help," she tells him. Steve smiles back gratefully and they get to work.


They arrive at Vulcan and all the other ships have been destroyed. They look out at the wreckage and Steve feels a tightening in his gut, unhappy with the total destruction of all these cadets. This is why he wanted to join the 'Fleet, to stop unnecessary deaths like this and all the people who wish to exact it. An anger he suspects was always there curls low in his stomach, and Steve is ready to do what he needs to in order to stop this ship. He's Captain America apparently, this is exactly his kind of fight.

When Pike asks for someone with close-range combat skills every fiber of his being literally cannot not volunteer.


Olson's rushing to do this for all the wrong reasons, Steve knows. He can tell at first glance that the man is just looking for the next great adrenaline rush, and it's going to make him very reckless. Kirk is being reasonable at least, trying to judge how well this will go so he can build up some sort of expectation. When they ask Steve what his training was, he only says close combat and martial arts because he really can't just say military.

Then they're at the drop site and Steve, Kirk, and Olson are falling from the ship straight towards the drill hanging down the center of Vulcan. Olson is gleefully shouting from his spot a couple of meters in front of them and Steve gets a bad feeling the more excitedly Olson shouts as they get closer to the drill. Then they reach a safe deployment zone and Steve waits a little before pulling his own parachute while Kirk follows suit next to him. They're both yelling out for Olson to deploy his chute while he wants to just keep going. Steve gets very frustrated and when he sees Olson only has about ten more seconds before he leaves the safe zone and is officially base jumping.

"Olson pull your chute now or you're going to break every bone in your body!" He barks. It comes out sounding more like an order, but Steve doesn't care, the engineer is going to kill himself being this stupid, and Steve doesn't want that to happen.

Something in his tone must strike Olson because the man finally pulls his chute seconds after he leaves the safe zone. He's still going too fast, though, and Steve watches in despair as the engineer uselessly tries to maneuver the parachute and ends up missing the edge of the drill, getting caught in the force of the drill's blast and flinging straight into the beam.

"Enterprise, Olson's down," Steve hears Kirk say.

They start to get near the drill and Steve tries to maneuver himself close enough to the drill that he can land safely. The wind is too strong, he can feel it, and knows he could easily meet the same fate as Olson, and instinct just kicks in. He gets fairly close to the drill, and then hits the button that will retract his parachute before the wind can blow him away. He's free-falling again and the only thing that saves his dumbass is the same instinct he uses when he fights kicking in and stopping him from falling off the side of the drill. Kirk sounds like he might be yelling, but Steve can't be bothered to confirm it since there's a Romulan coming out of one of the hatches on the drill and his eyes are directly on Steve. Working quickly, Steve pulls off his helmet, and digs the phaser out of the gun holder on the suit.

The Romulan is coming closer. Steve checks the setting on the phaser, and then whips it up again to aim and shoot. The laser hits the other man straight on the chest, and the man goes down. To his left, Kirk is engaged in a fist fight with another Romulan and Steve can see a third making his way over quickly. The final one reaches Steve before he can fire his phaser and kicks it out of Steve's hand. The Romulan swings his fist, and Steve ducks, throwing his left arm out for balance as he swings his legs out to the right and trips the Romulan. His opponent only kicks himself back up again and the fight is on. They trade punches until Steve manages to get a hit into the man's solar plexus, not holding back on his strength. The Romulan doubles over and Steve brings his knee up to the man's face, and then throws him to the side, a little too hard. He watches as his opponent falls off the side of the drill and turns to see that Kirk is also close to getting kicked off. Steve spies his phaser laying on the ground, not far away, and runs to grab it and fire a shot at Kirk's opponent. The other topples down to the ground, gone, and Steve rushes forward to help Kirk get back up again.

The other man is giving Steve a strange look, but Steve can only grin and ask, "Had him on the ropes?"

The phrase feels very familiar, like it was something he had heard often, and it sparks a feeling of fond sadness in him. Steve ignores it, but files the feeling away for something to think about later. He's felt that same mixture of emotions several times, mostly in relation to a half remembered smile, the phantom presence of a person behind his left side, and a flash of metal. Steve believes it is most likely the same person, but thinking about them always makes his chest constrict and his heart beat hard against his chest so he only does it when he's alone.

Kirk stares at Steve for a moment more, before he moves passed Steve to stare at the drill. "Olson had the charges," Kirk tells him.

"I know, think we can use something else can destroy this?" Steve asks, moving to stand next to Kirk.

As if they are in tandem with each other, both men's eyes land on the Romulans' guns and they move to pick one up for each.

"I don't know," Kirk says grinning as he hefts the gun up, "but I'd like to try."

With that, he opens fire on what looks like it could be a central console on the drill. Steve follows suit, and they watch as it starts to throw sparks and emit smoke. Right on cue, they hear the crew of the Enterprise announce the reestablishment of a connection followed by an order not to move.

This is Steve's life, though, so of course the Romulan ship decides to withdraw the drill at that exact moment, and Steve finds himself in a free fall, Kirk not far above him. Steve moves to readjust his posture, so that he can slow down a little more, but it means that his back is facing towards the sky, so he doesn't notice Kirk approaching until the other man bodily slams into his back.

"What'd you do that for!?" Steve yells at him. Kirk shrugs as much as a man falling through the air at an indeterminate speed can.

"We need to be close together so they can lock on to us better!" Kirk shouts back. Which, okay, yeah it makes sense, but Kirk body-slammed him. He could have done damage to the equipment in Steve's suit.

Kirk moves around again, so that they're at an even level, forming a two-person sky-diving circle. Group stays together, more resistance, and immediate help if something goes wrong with one of their parachutes. Steve tries to gauge their wind speed, and it feels like they're going much too fast to deploy safely, but the ground is also getting very close, and Transport is going to have a hell of a time locking in on them if they don't slow down.

"We need to deploy," he tells Kirk, who agrees with him.

"You go first!" Kirk yells. Steve acknowledges the statement and reaches for the string that should deploy his parachute and pulls on it. Nothing happens.

"I think it's stuck," He yells after the fourth tug with no success.

Kirk nods. "Great," he says, and reaches up to use his own parachute. His pops out, and Kirk steadies before reaching out and grabbing Steve so they can both slow down. It must be too much, because they hear the clang of metal snapping, and all of a sudden they're in free fall again.

"Enterprise, now would be a great time to beam us back!" Kirk yells.

Steve hears the women manning the transporter shouting that they're just moving too fast to get a lock on them. Awesome. He moves again to try and deploy his parachute, but it still isn't budging.

"Let me try," Kirk tells him. Steve nods, dropping the string and moving to instead hold Kirk close to him as the other man tries his luck at triggering deployment. Steve can see over Kirk's shoulder that the ground is still rapidly catching up to them, and that they are very, very close to it.

"Enterprise, please!" He yells out.

They are literally seconds away from impact; no parachute will be able to help them now. Steve twists, moving so that his back is to the ground, and will make him take most of the impact. He thinks Kirk may be yelling, but he can barely hear anything over the wind rushing passed his head and he closes his eyes, counting the seconds to impact.

They land with a thud, and it isn't nearly hard enough for how fast they were going so Steve cracks an eye open and looks around. They're on the transporter room pad, Steve lying flat on his back with Kirk over him, trying to recover from the sudden rescue. Chekov is sitting at the control for the transporter. Hands up in the air in victory, and Steve laughs at the dizzying sensation of relief and pride coursing through him. There was a point to those transporter equations he had been working through after all.

Then Captain Spock is walking into the room, and tells them to clear the pad so he can beam down. Kirk tries to convince him not to, but Spock insists on saving the council members of his people, who will be in charge of remembering Vulcan culture. Kirk's still trying to yell at Spock, so Steve places a hand on his shoulder, and gives the younger man a significant look.

"Let it go, this is obviously important to him," Steve whispers, even as Spock orders "Energize" and disappears.

Kirk deflates, conceding, but insists on staying to see what will happen.

When Spock's mother is lost in the middle of beaming while his entire planet is consumed in a black hole, and Steve sees the look on the Vulcan's face as he arrives, arm outstretched to catch her, Steve feels sorry for the Captain. That kind of loss must be overwhelming to him, and Steve knows that it's the kind of loss that will change the Vulcan's life forever. Strangely, he also feels a deep and strong sense of empathy, like he's gone through the exact same thing all of Vulcan is experiencing now, and can only hope they can also find the other side. It's fitting, he supposes, from a certain perspective, he did.


Captain Spock orders Steve to accompany the Vulcan Elders to the med bay, and then work with them to copy down and preserve the Vulcan culture so that it may live on.

Steve personally thinks that they're a little more focused on trying to overcome the loss of their entire planet than they are passing down their culture to Steve, so he gives them all a moment and opts to instead sit to the side of the med bay. He's out of the way of the busy doctors, but still close enough to offer support, and let them come to him when they're ready to start doing something about the lives they've all lost.

As a direct result, he misses all of the drama on the bridge of the Enterprise, but he hears later, through Doctor McCoy's angry ramblings, that Jim Kirk has been kicked off the ship for mutiny and marooned on a nearby planet with a Federation base. He gets the feeling that decision will lead to a long line of repercussions down the road.


When the Vulcan High Council is ready, Steve earnestly copies down everything they have to say, and matches it up with some of the Star Fleet records they carry on Vulcans. Together, they all fill in the gaps in knowledge in order to get an almost completely full record on Vulcan history and culture. It fascinates Steve, who has to hold back so he doesn't bombard them all with an endless list of questions and it takes them three weeks to write down everything. He gets sucked in, learning and writing down everything, slipping in that headspace he sometimes falls into where everything else just fades away until he's only focused on the task at hand, and before he knows it, two hours have apparently passed and he has been moving at a pace that is not natural, because he has been getting down all of the Vulcan's words (word for word) by hand, even though it was originally supposed to just be notes because they were talking far too quickly. Steve becomes aware that all of the Vulcan's present are staring at him with what must be suspicion and curiosity, eyes flicking between Steve and the tablet he was using with questions written in their eyebrows.

"Uh, I get carried away sometimes," he said, glancing at all of the Vulcans focusing their brain power on him. It's a little disturbing, to be honest, and Steve wants to fidget.

"I believe you are being called to the Bridge," one of the elders finally says, a single eyebrow raised.

Wow, that feels condescending, Steve thinks, as he finally hears Kirk's voice over the comm saying "Lieutenant Rogers, please report to the Bridge," for what must have been multiple times.

"Oh," Steve replies, because he's eloquent. "Well, sorry for the interruption, but I need to go."

He sets down the tablet, and quickly hops to his feet so he can get to the Bridge.


Everyone on the Bridge is hatching an elaborate plot to beam aboard the Narada, stop the Romulans, and rescue Captain Pike before they try to destroy Earth. Steve has absolutely no idea why he's been asked to join them. Seriously, they seem like they've got it all covered, Steve doesn't know why they are specifically requesting he joins them. He tries to ask Kirk when he first steps out, but the man just pulls Steve off to the side of the circle, tells him to listen, and goes back to the discussion.

Chekov is running back towards one of the other computers, writing utensil in one hand, a blank pad in the other, and even as he's moving, he links an arm through Steve's and drags the disgruntled blond to the computer with him.

"Quick, of all the planets in Earth's solar system, which one is big enough to hide the Enterprise?" Chekov asks him.

"How much do you want to hide it?" Steve asks, moving to one of the other computers to pull up the dimensions of the starship and match it up against planets. So far, seven of them are already kicked out.

"Can't be seen or detected on radar," Chekov replies immediately.

"Saturn could be big enough, but you'd have to get passed the rings on that. If not, Jupiter and Neptune are the only other plausible ones if you're going for what I think you're going for."

Chekov grins, already pulling up the relevant data on the two planets of choice and getting to work on some calculations. It takes him about three minutes, in which time the rest of the Bridge have started yelling and bickering with each other over how to set-up the attack. Steve checks over what Chekov is trying to accomplish, and smiles when he sees the solution the Russian has reached.

Steve reaches over Chekov's shoulder to pull up a closer map of Titan, and pulls up the moon's electromagnetic and gravity fields. He looks back at Chekov's math, where the man is double-checking his calculations, and decisively marks a specific area just to the side of the planet.

"If we stay here at the right angle, that should be just enough for what you had in mind," Steve announces.

Chekov turns and looks at the spot Steve has marked down and nods in agreement. He moves to the Captain, Steve right behind him, and explains his plan to hide the ship so that the Narada can't see the Enterprise, but the Enterprise can still get the drop on the enemy ship. Kirk nods, ready to go with the plan, but then Doctor McCoy steps in and asks Chekov how old he is.

The navigator proudly declares his 17 years of age, and McCoy is giving the look of a man who just found out his 5-year-old made him a cup of coffee and is being forced to drink it and call it delicious. Steve bristles a little, because he knows Chekov, and he knows that the boy is more than capable of doing his job or Star Fleet wouldn't have given him such a high position. Anyone who tries to imply any different is in for trouble directly from Steve. Before he can start defending his friend, though, Spock enters the Bridge, declares Chekov right, and volunteers to go invade the Narada himself. Then both the Captain and Spock are going to go and infiltrate the enemy ship and Steve still isn't sure why he's on the Bridge. They set the plan in motion, everyone scattering to fulfill the duties they need, and Steve is left standing in the corner like an idiot, with his arms crossed over his blue shirt to keep from fiddling with the hem, and the tiny holes all over the cloth.

Finally, when they're on their way to Titan, Kirk moves away from the front of the ship and towards Steve at the back.

"Rogers," he greets.

"Captain," Steve nods back, "all due respect, sir, why am I here?"

Kirk settles against the wall opposite Steve, close to the Turbolift, and sweeps a considering look over Steve's body. "I remember you from those combat training classes. You know how to fight well, and every time you were made Team Leader in the group exercises, you came up with brilliant plans."

Steve was confused, did he want Steve to help with the planning? If so, why would he have Steve standing to the side, and not actively planning with them? "What's your point, sir?" He asks instead.

"Culture," Kirk says, "why'd you choose it if you so obviously could have made it into security, or even Captain if you wanted it?"

Steve sighs. He's had this same conversation with some of the admiralty at Star Fleet, who felt he was better suited for fighting.

"Permission to answer freely, sir," he requested.

Kirk considered it. "Granted," he acquiesced.

"Thank you," Steve replied. He settled into a parade rest position, and kept his chin high and voice low as he answered. "I woke up on a Federation Starship four years ago with only the information that I had been found alone in space with no sign of the rest of my crew, and no memory of who I was. They found me in a cryotube, no idea how long I'd been there, no records of who I was before or if there's even anyone out there waiting for me. The only thing I had was an idea of what my name was, and apparently the markings of several wounds, one directly to the head being the cause of my memory loss. Maybe I had been security personnel Before, it would explain a lot of things, but either way it's not who I am now. I chose my career because I had been so lost and confused when I first woke up that the thought of what I do potentially helping people like me was irresistible.

"I know that's probably not what you were expecting to here, but it's the truth. I don't mind fighting every once in a while, but the thought of doing it regularly makes me so tired and worn down I don't want to consider it," Steve finished.

Kirk looked a little stunned. "Understood," he finally said.

Then, it was time to go, and Kirk was leaving with Spock, and Steve found himself going back down to the room he had left the Vulcan Elders in to explain the situation.


It was through a hell of a lot of luck, but they survived. The Narada was gone, most of the crew accounted for, the Enterprise safely away from the fighting, and they were just docking back into the space station. The only cadet ship to survive the attack. When they landed back on Earth, Steve continued his data-gathering with the Vulcans, carefully trying to keep from remembering just how many students died, how many of his friends were no longer walking around the campus, joking around and getting into silly sparring matches with each other


He had to move away from the academy, couldn't stand all the emptiness surrounding him when he tried to stay. He got a job at one of the local Star Fleet archives, and mostly sat around doing busy work. Steve kept in touch with the Academy friends who survived, he still regularly talked to Chekov who was going on about how he had been selected yet again as ship navigator on the newly made Enterprise. He went to the christening on the Enterprise, and then to the memorial for the attack a couple of months later and tried not to be depressed by how many cadets were present for the senior class when he could still remember the room full they had had the day they all came for Kirk's tribunal that fateful day. He watched as the rest of the Enterprise crew went up into space, while he stayed grounded on earth, and hoped they would be okay out there. Space was huge, and full of so many surprising things just waiting to be found.

Still, he continued to send letters to Chekov every week, and continued to work. He would get his chance soon enough.

It turns out that chance came in the form of an Admiral Marcus, holding the promise of information about Steve's family holding over his head unless Steve agreed to move to a different data archive nearly a year later.

Because there's a man out there, just like Steve, who would do anything to protect the crew he considers family, and Steve's right up at the top of that list.

Notes: So, you made it all this way! Congrats! I'm working on a second part to add on to this detailing Into Darkness, so you have that to look forward to at least. Thank you for reading, please feel free to leave any constructive criticism you have, this is my first time doing Star Trek. Also, I am looking for a Beta, so if anyone wants to help, they are welcome to it.