Harry was woken up by a soft nudge, and the sweet voice of his aunt said: "Harry, dear, we're going out. You have sandwiches and a strawberry sundae in the fridge; eat as much as you want, Dudley said he's not hungry. Oh, and, not to forget, he said something about some computer game - if you can help him and kill some... alien boss, I think, for him... All right, see you, sweetie-pie." Petunia looked at him dearly and quietly went out. He soon heard their car speeding away.

Harry mumbled something and sat up. Hedwig was whistling some melody and croaked to Harry: "'Edwig wants a cracker! 'Edwig 'ungrrry!"

"All right, all right." He stood up, groggy and bleary-eyed, and went to the kitchen. He overslept the whole afternoon and he still felt tired. He shouldn't have drank so much beer last night, but him and good ol' Big D were having so much fun. Harry smiled. They sure made those little morons think next time before disgracing D's athletic figure.

Little faces were watching Harry from inside the fridge, as he opened the door. "Oh, you silly woman," Harry thought, "We're fifteen!" But he took the smiling sandwich faces and readily ate them all.

"'Edwig 'ungrry!", the owl uttered from Harry's room. He cursed and cut some bread, but before he could take it to Hedwig, the main door opened, followed by a sound of thunder. Eight or nine dark silhouettes contoured on the stormy sky, glaring at Harry with their fiery eyes. He froze in shock.

"NOOO... You, there!" Harry was furious. "Can't you see you're standing on Petunia's lawn! Gee! And when I just think how diligently Dudley mowed the grass and how persistently Auntie tried to make those pansies to flower! Move, goddamnit!"

"Oh, do shut up, Potter," someone said.

Harry tried to recall the voice. "Lupin?"

The people came in one by one, wiping their feet on the rug. One of them was truly Lupin, cocky as always, in one of his many Versace suits. Next to him stood... "Mad-eye Moody?"

"Yarrrr", answered Alastor Moody.

"Nymphadora Tonks", a young woman shook his hand. She was dressed in an elegant grey costume. "You can call me Nymphadora... Wow, the newest Samsonite brief case!" Nymphadora admired Mr. Dursley's most serious brief case.

"This is Kingsley Shacklebolt," Lupin pointed to a tiny pale wizard with white-blond hair, who was eyeing Harry dubiously. He said, "Are you sure this is Potter? He doesn't look much like James - or Lily - to me..."

"Yarrr, who cares." Moody was toying with the magnets on the fridge, especially with a big ladybug. He stealthily glanced through the back of his head and slipped the magnet in his pocket.

After all of them presented themselves to Harry, Lupin ordered him to pack his stuff and ready the broom. "We're leaving immediately, on an important business."

"But... I can't leave my family without saying goodbye! Auntie will be desperate!"

"You can leave them a note," Lupin suggested, "But do it quickly, Potter, we don't have much time to waste."

"I could type it for you," Nymphadora interrupted. "First prize for fast typing on The Annual Amanuensis Competition in the Ministry of Magic this June. Whaddaya say, huh?"

They flew up and soon started freezing to death. Little icicles hung from their brooms, but Mad-Eye Moody insisted to keep heading north. "Arrr! Muggle looking up!" he yelled.

"It's just an Eskimo ... And he's not looking up, he's fishing. Oh, lookie, a walrus!" Tonks said.

"Mad-Eye, shall we get back on the course?", Lupin asked, "I think you saw enough of Greenland. My Gucci shoes started to glaciate..."

"Narrr! Wait 'til I see an igloo! Then we will go back."

Luckily, they saw an original Inuit igloo soon afterwards. Blissful Moody and excruciated rest sharply turned South-Southeast and headed to London. Harry felt the city lights melt the ice from his hair and brow as they descended. The crew landed their brooms in a small, gloomy square.

Lupin handed Harry a piece of paper. "Potter, take a look at this. Chop-chop, hurry up!"

Harry opened it and read the note, which was written in elegant calligraphy well known to him:

Roses are red, violets are blue. The Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix at number twelve, Grimmauld Place, London, found may be. Abandon all hope, thou who enterest.

Also, two smaller papers fell on his palm: "Your future is as boundless as the lofty heaven," and "Help! I'm being held hostage in a Chinese fortune-cookie factory!" What the... "Lupin? Since when is Dumbledore working in a fortune-cookie factory?"

"What? No, he's not. Dumbledore's on a very important meeting with the Chinese Minister of Magic in Beijing. Come on, get in." He pointed towards a tall house which was emerging between numbers eleven and thirteen. He approached a dark door and tapped it with his wand, ignoring the silver, serpent-like doorknocker.