Thanks to: Porkbuns of AO3 and Hinagiku Zeelmart for approving this fic for me, thus making me confident enough to post this.
Warning: tissue warning.
Inspired by the scene of Shi's death in DW 8. Enjoy!
"Zhao, everyone, well done."
Hearing your voice, I turned around, a beginning of a smile on my lips, hope in my heart. Then I saw you and my heart fell. You looked… well, if I said not good, it would be an understatement.
The first thing I noticed was the way your shoulders slumped. You. Who wore pride like it was the most natural thing to you. You, who always stood with back ramrod straight. You, who always held your head high. You. My big brother who I had always thought to be invincible.
Until now.
You took a step forward, away from Deng Ai's support. The thought of you needing someone's help somehow made me want to laugh. In hysteric. You hated looking weak. As such, you did not always look for help, even when you needed it. Hell, sometimes you refused my help even when I offered it. I wondered how bad your condition was for you to accept help from stranger like Deng Ai. Granted, he was an officer in the army you led. But he was not family.
As you walked towards us, towards me, I noticed that you were limping. Gone was the confidence in your gait, the dignity in your countenance. And I did not know why, but of all things, this was what made me angry, furious with indignation.
What right did that bastard Wen Qin have to reduce you to this? I seethed, my blood boiling.
Then I noticed the blood – it was staining your clothes, painting the road red. There seemed to be so much red already. And yet, it kept coming out, seeping out of your wounds in a steady stream – and my anger vanished, replaced by worry. You had one hand covering the left side of your face, yet I could still see how it was mauled beyond repair.
My heart skipped a beat. There's so much blood...
In the back of my mind, I knew your wound was bad, that you were...
He's dying, a part of me – the realistic, rational part of me that I hated so much right now – pointed out.
No! I denied it. He's strong. He'll make it out of this mess alive, you'll see. He has to. I sounded petulant even in my own head. But I could not care less.
"We shall reform Wei under our ideals, and seize control of the land itself."
See? My brother is strong, I told the doubtful part of myself triumphantly, smirking inwardly. If he's still able to preach about his ideal then he's just fi—
"However, my own destiny…"
That was when you collapsed.
And I caught you, heart in my throat. In seconds, my hands were drenched in blood. Your blood.
"Zhao… Now it falls to you."
I held you tighter. As if that way, I could keep you from…
Dy—
"Stop it!" I cried out, both to you and to myself. I did not want to think about that. I refused! "Don't say that!"
Don't even think about it…
… Or it will come true…
"Until the end…"
Stop talking as if you're about to die! I wanted to yell at you, shake you so you would come to your senses.
But he is dying… that traitorous part of my mind whispered, rearing its ugly head once again. Goodness, how I wanted to rip it apart. Or better yet, tore that bastard Wen Qin limb from limb.
"… I did only that which needed to be done. Zhao, you too…"
You reached out to me, your ever-steady hand shaking for once. But before I could grab it, it fell, limp.
You were dea—
No, no, NO!
"This can't be happening!" I shook my head in denial. "Brother… Brother!" I called out to you. But your eyes stayed close, your body listless in my arms.
The words "he's dead" echoed in my head.
Dead, dead, dead… Dead!
Because that stupid bastard Wen Qin just had to stage a rebellion and ambush my brother.
Because those remains of Shu simply refused to give up for good.
Because I was too weak, too slow, too stupid, too… soft-hearted, I spat the word hatefully.
What was it that Jia Chong said to me, once?
That if I showed my enemies any mercy then I'd have a mess on my hands?
And what a mess it is…
My brother was dead and now I had to rule in his stead.
Me.
What a joke.
Laughter bubbled in my throat and tears stung my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. The last thing I needed right now was to cry and look weak in front of everyone.
So, I threw my head back and laughed instead.
And laughed.
And laughed some more.
Then I stopped, abruptly.
From the corner of my eyes, I saw Yuanji trying to reach out to me, trying to… what? comfort me?
I don't need it! I wanted to snarl. I could not be weak, not now, if ever.
I swatted her hand away and she looked away, holding her hand close to her chest, looking heartbroken. A part of me felt guilty for that.
She's just trying to help.
But I stomped it down.
"Listen up, everyone," I started. My voice was quiet. It was nothing but a soft murmur. Everyone focused on me anyway. "From now on, we'll crush every one of our enemies like the insects that they are."
And I'll do it with great relish, I thought sadistically, grinning from ear-to-ear.
"Every. One. Of them." I emphasized, alternately looking everyone right in the eye. I did not know what kind of expression I had on my face, but it inspired… wariness – or is it fear? I could not help but wondered – in Yuanji and Jia Chong. A part of me felt saddened at that. If my own friends, my most loyal friends, were scared of me – of what I had become – what would the others think about me? But another part of me – admittedly the bigger part – simply did not care.
I thought there was a place for kindness in this chaotic era. I was wrong. And my mistake cost me my brother. I would not make the same mistake.
Now, I knew better.
Now…
"No more mercy."
End.
A/N:
I know in the scene of Shi's death in DW8 there is no blood whatsoever. But come on! There must be some blood.
I don't know why, but I love making happy-go-lucky characters turn dark (i.e. Dick Grayson of Batman in Snapshots). Oh well...
Oh, even though the status of this story is complete, I do plan to make a sequel for it. Which will make this story end with a (kind of) happy ending. But, I don't know, some people love tragedies more, so, what do you think?
FYI: I still do write stories for Batman. In fact, I have one story finished already (but I haven't sent it to my beta... Which I'll try to do ASAP)
Disclaimer: Have you seen dark!Zhao prancing around ancient China of DW and go killing everyone? No? Then I don't own DW.
Last but not least, thanks you for all of you who have faved/followed my stories/myself. And many thanks to you, reviewers.
