It's like screaming...
That's what Jesse wanted to do when her best friend, and loyal pet pig, Reuben, had died. She wanted to scream. She wanted to sob. Jesse wished that she had fallen instead of Reuben. If only, what if... those words kept on popping in her mind, as she lay on her bed staring at the ceiling.
...and no one can hear.
Even if she did scream when he fell, no one would've heard her inside the Wither Storm. She thought she was going to die when she fell, but a different life had.
You almost feel ashamed...that someone could be that important.
Jesse's thoughts switch to Ellie/Magnus. She kind of felt ashamed, she/he was very important to us all. Jesse made a mistake, and she would never do it again. But she had.
And without them, you feel like nothing.
She wanted to feel something, but she couldn't. It was as if the air had been sucked out of her, the soul flattened.
No one will ever understand how much it hurts...
It hurt everywhere. In her stomach, her head, but mostly, her heart. A pang of emotions threatened to be released from her body. She felt the tears blurring her vision.
...You feel hopeless...
Jesse felt that mostly, though. She thought of letting Lukas leave to find his friends, and she thought that she had let down own more person.
But nothing can save you...
Only her friends had saved her. She would keep fighting.
And when it's over, and it's gone...
The chaos was over. Reuben was gone.
You almost wish you could have all the bad stuff back...
Jesse sometimes thought about when the Wither Storm was still loose. Those were days of chaos...
So that you could have the good...
She thought of the good times she had with Reuben, Ellegaard/Magnus, and Lukas. Those were the days of adventure, happiness, and friendship. She couldn't have those anymore, unless she tried.
Keep...believing, and stay strong.
Jesse heard a soft knocking and slowly walked to the door. She glanced at her small mirror and saw that she looked like a mess. Who cares, she was still grieving. When she opened her door, it shocked her that it was Lukas. Jesse's vision suddenly blurred, and she wrapped her arms around Lukas. He awkwardly patted her back. She, surprisingly, sobbed with relief. Relief that one of the few people she was thinking about was still here.
"It's okay, Jesse. You're okay," he said softly.
She reluctantly pulled back and swiped at her eyes, "I'm...I'm just glad you're here."
"Thinking about Reuben and Ellegaard/Magnus again?" he asked.
"Yeah...mostly Reuben," Jesse said.
"Hey, none of those are your fault. You couldn't have possibly known what was going to happen," he said.
"I'm tired of everyone saying that," she muttered.
Lukas clasped his hand to Jesse's, "We-you can get through this. I'll help you, and so will everyone else, even Ivor."
She glanced at him and said weakly, "You sure?"
"Positive," he gave a small smile.
She wrapped her arms around him again, and this time, it was a real embrace.
You'll be just fine.
