The Diary of a Real Evil Prick
The title of this story is credited to George Carlin; as it really suit's the content of the story I decided to use this title. I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh or the characters
MONDAY
Today was such great fun! While Ryou was out at school, Marik and I decided to go out and have a little bit of fun. We went to Kaiba's company and hid in the bushes with tons of snowballs. Every time that someone left the building we would hit them in the face with a snowball. It was funniest when Kaiba was on his cell phone and the snowball that I threw hit him in the face, he dropped his cell phone and slipped on a slick patch in the parking lot. The best part of it all was that his ass crushed his cell phone. Personally, I don't think that the person on the other end of the phone noticed anything any different; they were still talking to an asshole.
The day got even better! While Ryou was cooking I threw a tennis ball covered with dog shit into the soup that he was making for himself. Thankfully he had his head in the fridge while I stirred the tennis ball around in the soup making sure that all the dog shit was off of it. I was able to fish the ball out right before he turned around to ask me what I was doing. I gave him an innocent smile and said that I was waiting for him to finish cooking I on the other hand would never eat the fowl concoction anyway, so I did not have to think up an excuse for not eating the soup. Ryou enjoyed his soup and said that it was the best soup that he had ever eaten in his life. I told him that it was the special ingredient that I had added for him. He turned slightly green and asked me what I had added to his soup. I grinned and told him that I had added an old tennis ball covered in old dog shit. I enjoyed watching him pass out and the rest of his soup pour onto his lap when his noggin pushed the bowl over.
Yes, over all it was a good day. Tomorrow will probably not disappoint. Yugi had invited Ryou to his pool party at the local pool…and I got an invite as well. Maybe I can drown the Pharaoh or pull his swim trunks off or something. I cannot wait for tomorrow! I have so much energy…maybe I should call Marik. Yeah! Now where the fuck is that telephone…?
