Disclaimer: All WWE related material is owned by Vince McMahon and is used here strictly for entertainment purposes. No copyright infringement is intended.

Music Disclaimer: Lyrics used in this song are by Hinder and no copyright infringement is intended.

Summary: John Cena is faced with a life altering event and is forced to analyze every aspect in his life. Can he save himself before it's too late or will he be lost forever?

Characters: John Cena, Randy Orton, Michelle McCool, Trish Stratus. These are just the main characters that will appear but there will be other secondary characters as the story continues.

Authors Note: Not my first John Cena story but the first one in over four years so now that his Vanilla Ice persona of those days has passed, I hope I can write him better then I did all those years ago. Thank you for any interest you have in this story and for any and all reviews you give as they are not mandatory. I'm just happy to know it is being looked at. Happy Reading!


(I don't wanna know)
(I don't wanna know)
(I don't wanna know)

He opened the door of the apartment, slipping his keys back into his pocket once the door slid unlocked. The house was dark, the lights off aside from the odd candle that flickered throughout the house. He had shared this house with his live in girlfriend Michelle for almost six months now. Her personal touches were all over the place, which is where the candles came in. He was not a candle man but did whatever his girlfriend wanted because he was home a lot less then she was and she needed to feel at home somewhere.

Throwing his bag down onto the floor he turned on the light next to the kitchen and watched as the living room then became bathed in light. Scanning the room, looking for any sign of in the little apartment he decided to kick off his boots and have a rest in the bedroom until Michelle returned.

It was a surprise for her of course, him showing up the way he was, she was not expecting him until the next night and he hoped she would be as happy to see him as he was going to be to see her. He had been waiting all week to get back to her and now he finally had his chance. With his schedule as Champion, it was amazing he even had this long between shows.

The turned the knob of the bedroom door and pushed into it to open it but took a step back when it didn't budge. Since when did his bedroom door have locks on it? Was it possible that out of loneliness and fear Michelle had gotten locks installed in case of emergency? Or was it just that the window was open again and making the damn door stick?

He knew he was supposed to take care of that before he went off for the last week long stint with the WWE and was upset now that he had forgotten all about it. If he was going to co habitat with a woman, most of all the woman of his dreams, he was going to have to keep better tabs on things.

He pushed on the door again, watching as it gave way under his strength and he walked into the room. He saw the shape in the bed then, figuring it was just Michelle napping. She had a tendency to sleep like the dead so it was no shock that she hadn't heard him trying to get in. It was then that the shape moved, making a moaning noise that he noticed that hers wasn't the only shape in the bed.

The shadow of a man was there as well, a man he couldn't see the features of but recognized that tattoos off immediately. With as much force as his shocked body could muster, he pushed the now half open door closed behind him, causing the gush of air to permeate through the room and hit the two occupants of the bed.

The both stopped moving and turned around to where he stood, the shocked expressions more then enough indication that they hadn't expected him there and would have been finished before he had come home the next day.

He caught Michelle's eye and then broke the gaze, afraid that by looking at her he might give in to just how beautiful she still looked, even as she was in the heat of cheating on him.

He turned around, not wanting to stand there and stare at the two of them for another moment and walked slowly from the room leaving the door open a slit as he did. He made his way back out into the living room and sat down on the couch, trying to control his breathing and attempt to make sense of just what was going on here.

He heard her footsteps then, soft against the tiles on the floor and knew she was in the living room with him. Before she could come over to him and lay a hand on him in explanation he stood and backed away. There was no way he could let her near him now, not when the anger he felt flooded his thoughts and his veins like daggers and he couldn't be responsible for anything he did. Nor could he let her near because he still loved her and was afraid that a mere touch from the woman he loved would break him and he would instantly forget she had broken their commitment to each other.

"Why?" was all he could manage to choke out as he slowly raised his head to the woman now standing before him. Michelle, the woman he had loved and pledged his heart too.

"It was a mistake John, it was never supposed to happen this way. I was ending it and you were never supposed to find out." she pleaded, all the while watching as John kept shaking his head, trying not to believe what she was telling him.

"What do you mean it wasn't supposed to happen? Of course it was. You wanted me to eventually find out otherwise you would never have done this. And with him no less."

The him in question made his way out into the living room then, thankfully fully clothed and he looked eyes with John. There was nothing more that he wanted to do now then to ring that assholes neck but he knew that Randy wasn't the only one to blame for this. It had been both of their choices and they both needed to pay. He wasn't sure how but he knew he needed to get them the hell out of there and quick.

"John,"Randy interjected before he could speak. "I didn't plan this alright, it just sort of happened. I know there is no excuse, so I won't give one but we both needed each other."

John laughed sarcastically, not really caring what either of them needed. He was sure they both needed a good smack in the head but he also knew he could never be the one to do it. HE might be strong in the ring but he would never strong arm someone he cared about, least of all these two even though he wanted too.

"Well you know what? You can both have each other if thats what you want. Because as of right now I want you both out of here, out of the apartment and out of my life. When I get back I want the house rid of all of this crap and lies."

He left the apartment then, his fists clenched together in anger and his heart breaking from the inside out. There was nowhere he could go now that would wipe away the pain in his chest. He had finally admitted to loving someone and this was the way it went down and ended. He was positive as he walked out of the building and onto the street that he would never be the same again.

And he never was.