~A/N~ Listen as you read: "Love Me Harder" by Ariana Grande

"(F/N)! You okay?"

You look up from your laptop and see no one other than Chief Erwin Smith peeking through your door. You smiled politely at the blond man and nodded.

"Of course, I'm just looking over the lyrics of this song for this performance that's all." You cleared your throat a little, "Why do you ask?"

Erwin shrugged and shook his head. "No it's nothing, you just... you just look like there's a lot on your mind."

There is. You can't even imagine the thoughts that are tormenting my mind or the feelings that are tearing up my heart.

"No not at all, Chief! I'm just really into my work that's all!" He nods and walks off.

That wasn't a complete lie at all. You were after all a very famous singer within Wall Sina known for your soulful mezzo-soprano voice. Your father was a farmer and your mother was a doctor from Wall Maria who often took you with her to tend to wounded soldiers after their expeditions outside the walls. As you helped nurse a soldier back to help, you had a tendency to sing to them to ease them through their pain. That's how you quickly earned a named for yourself for singing from a young age to defeated Survey Corps soldiers after a failed expectation. It was noted how effective your comforting voice was to suffering soldiers and how much it boosted their morale. You then became sought out by the aristocracy within Wall Sina after word of the pretty young girl who could comfort wounded soldiers with the sound of her voice spread like wildfire throughout the walls. You went from being a poor farmer's daughter to a famous court singer who usually performed for the entertainment of the very haughty and arrogant aristocracy. Although you were famous enough to be asked for autographs and were well off enough to help your parents live a much better life, you were deeply unhappy with your life. You wanted to sing for others to make them feel better just like you used to before, not for the entertainment of rich drunkards who would rather look at you lustfully rather than listen to your singing. You hated them and you hated growing up in the King's castle. You especially hated the Military Police, who did not even endure the same magnitude of suffering or were as disciplined as the Survey Corps yet strode around thinking they were entitled to any amount of respect. They didn't need you at all. You were just an additional trophy.

Then he came along.

Corporal Levi Ackerman.

The man who requested you specifically to come to Wall Rose and be a source of morale for his fellow soldiers who needed all the comfort they could get. They had face an unfortunate series of defeats against the titans outside the walls and they were in desperate need of morale after sustaining so many loses.

You could still remember the first time you both met after he personally came to the King's home where you resided for you. You came in wearing your elegant gown which every noblewoman would wear with your (h/l) (h/c) flowing elegantly behind your back. Years of having to be bossed around by such arrogant people had turned you into a woman with a cold and distant demeanor although you still maintained your classical beauty that radiated kindness. You were escorted to the King's court, expecting the bastard to demand for you to sing for his stupid rich friends or have another suitor waiting for you to reject the hell out of him. Instead you look up and see a rather impressive sight.

You meet steel grey eyes behind flecks of raven colored locks and notice that they belong to no other than the legendary Levi Ackerman, humanity's strongest soldier. You've never met him but you've definitely known him by reputation from everyone in the court. Noblewomen whined and argued about who would ever be able to win his heart, and the King often sent men to his headquarters to coerce him into working personally for him. And here he was. Right in front of you, staring at you with deep interest in his eyes, those grey orbs slowly looking you up and down as if he was carefully taking in every inch of you. He points at you.

"I'll take her."

Being the fickle bastard he was, the King was more than happy to give you to his favorite corporal in order to win his favor but you were much more happier to leave that sickening palace. That's how Levi saved you from that horrid place, and what would soon be the start of a very passionate affair between the both of you.

At first he didn't do much but constantly flicker his eyes at you when he thought you weren't looking. But you noticed. And for some reason it didn't bother you. You would flush at the fact that the very attractive soldier couldn't stop himself from throwing looks at you. Sometimes in the cafeteria, in the halls, or even while you performed. Sometimes he even would glance at you while you walked through the training grounds; you wouldn't dare to look at him, who often practiced shirtless, revealing his extremely muscular physique. Sometimes you wondered if he did it on purpose. But he never approached you. Just looked at you.

Your friend, Mikasa suddenly enters your room and interrupts your flashback. There's a sense of urgency in her eyes that immediately catches your attention.

You quickly stand up and ask, "What's wrong? Did something happen?"

She says nothing but rather grabs your wrist and pulls you abruptly with her. She leads you to towards the room you are to be performing in shortly but instead of entering, she turns around faces you seriously.

"That bastard is here."

You gulp hard in disbelief.

"It... it can't be. How is he here? He's supposed to be gone on a month long expedition!"

Mikasa shrugged and muttered, "I think they already caught the Female Titan already. All I know is that he came back early and is in there with the rest of his squad." She grabbed your shoulders tightly, "Please don't do this. He already hurt you enough, just cancel tonight."

You almost agree with her. The thought of Levi nowadays did nothing but bring you awful flashbacks and panic attacks even. You still haven't forgiven him for his betrayal after two years of dating... after all that time...

Instead you feel a sudden surge of determination in your heart. You don't want to suffer anymore. You don't want to hide from him anymore. You're going to face him tonight. In the best way you know how.

"Mikasa, tell Erwin to change the track to my song. I'm going to sing something else. I'm not scared enough to cancel."

She frowns, deeply concerned for you. She takes out a piece of paper from her pocket and hands it to you. "Just to let you know, he told me to give this to you. I refused at first but he was insisting so much, I honestly thought he would strangle me if I didn't." She hands it to me and turns to walk away to find Erwin.

Opening the letter shakily, I read:

(F/n), as soon as I heard you were back after your parents died, I fought like hell during that expedition to make sure I would come back to see you again alive. Goddammit, I miss you so much. I honestly thought I'd never see you again; I've spent the last 10 months trying to find you, trying to explain to you what really happened, but most of all, to apologize for what I have done to you. I have not forgotten about you, and I have not gone through a single day without thinking about you. I've laid awake at night trying to remember the sound of your voice, and the effect it had over me. It has not changed one bit and neither has my feelings for you.

Please let me explain myself, but if you don't, then at least let me apologize for what I've done. Just... let me know somehow, someway.

-Levi

You struggle to breathe as you clutch the piece of parchment in your hand, unable to believe your eyes. You wipe a tear from your eye and the nostalgic feeling his words bring to you. You feel a familiar, awful feeling overwhelm you: a panic attack.

No, you vehemently refuse. You're not going to back down into submission over his betrayal that you can never forget, you have a chance to overcome all this pain and move past it.

Levi was going to know how you felt after all this time.

Summoning all your courage, you take a deep breath and walk through the door. The first thing you notice is the dozens of young cadets and their commanders seated around tables, talking and taking large swigs of alcohol. You routinely make your way to the small stage set up for you with nothing more than a mic stand on it. You scan around the room and then you see them. Those cold grey eyes that had already spotted you.

Levi stares at you, but despite the stoic expression on his face, you know damn well what he's thinking. His heart picks up pace as he sees you once again after so long, he never thought he'd see your lovely face ever again. He's spent the last few months trying to contact you once again, to apologize and explain for his wrongdoing, hoping for a second chance. And now here you were, only a few feet away from him and he couldn't believe it.

You yourself feel the same butterflies in your stomach and the mutual sense of longing in your heart. However, you're the only one who only feels the stinging pain in your heart and surge of memories that torment you every night in your sleep. All you want to do is run away, away from him and never look back. But now you can't. And you won't', because you finally are going to show him how you really feel.

Erwin, being the gentleman he is, motions for the room to calm down and everyone quickly complies. You throw the corporal a thankful smile, causing him to slightly blush.

Of course he would, he has been developing feelings for you ever since your breakup.

You tap the microphone and lean in. "Good evening everyone, I know everyone was expecting a different song tonight but I decided to change the lineup tonight. I hope you like it."

The room becomes deathly quiet and you know it's your cue to start. So you begin:

Tell me something I need to know

Then take my breath and never let it go

If you just let me invade your space

I'll take the pleasure, take it with the pain

You remember the times Levi would run up behind you and grab your hand to catch your attention while no one was watching, and the innocent gestures of a growing romance he would do. You were cold and distant for so long due to the fact that you were only used to being chased by awful men, you weren't sure how to handle his courting. The flowers he sent to your room, the winks he would throw at you while you performed, the many times he asked for you to sing a song just for him. Or the time one of Hanji's titan experiments got loose and went on a deadly rampage all over headquarters. The titan had picked you up and was lifting you closer to his mouth until out of nowhere, Levi appeared in his 3D Maneuver Gear with both of his blades ready. In one sweep movement the nape of the titan's neck was sliced and it dropped you from his grip. You fell but before you had a chance to hit the ground, Levi caught up to you and grabbed you tightly. You both collided to the ground but he had you on top of him, sustaining more damage than you did. From then on out you would visit your hero at the infirmary from dawn to dusk, singing to him to help him get through his pain. Just like you used to.

And if in the moment I bite my lip

Baby, in that moment you'll know this is

Something bigger than us and beyond bliss

Give me a reason to believe it

Sure enough those visits bloomed into a deep romance and for once in your life you fell deeply in love with the stoic corporal. You couldn't resist his advances anymore as you got to know the kind of man he was. An intelligent, observant young man who was in no way stuck up because of his reputation as humanity's strongest soldier. You got to know how protective he was over those he loved, and how passionate he was about protecting humanity and wiping off the titans off the face of the planet. But never was Levi more protective of anyone else other than the beautiful singer he had saved from within Wall Sina.

'Cause if you want to keep me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder

And if you really need me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder

Baby, love me harder

Love me, love me, love me

Harder, harder, harder

Levi adored everything about you. The stunning (e/c) eyes of yours, the graceful way your (h/c) spilled over your back, your selfless wish to bring comfort to those who suffered, and your beautiful voice. He knew you were quite a commodity among the Survey Corps as you were quite a famous singer who drew plenty of unwanted attention from even men in his own squad. When he saw the others gawk at you or try to approach you, he would quickly stop what he was doing to stride over you and slide his hand to your waist, pulling you close to him as he threw a nasty glance at the men. The action was enough to warn off the rest of the men and you could not help but melt into his arms, not believing how someone so strong and gorgeous could ever love someone like you this much.

Until she showed up... Petra. She was sent from HQ to work alongside Levi and despite how much you hated it, they had to work together each minute of the day. Levi and Petra also started to spend time together outside of work; Petra was a daring and adventurous girl who shared many of the same passions Levi had. It didn't take long before Petra started showing some provocative behaviour around your boyfriend. Her growing attraction to him was painfully obvious. And it wasn't soon before long it caught Levi's eye.

You remember this as you sing and look up to meet Levi's stunned eyes as you sing the next verse of your song:

I know your motives and you know mine

The ones that love me, I tend to leave behind

If you know about me and choose to stay

Then take this pleasure and take it with the pain

He knows what you're talking about. You can see it in his widening, shocked grey eyes.

That goddamn night.

You had grown deeply unhappy after months of Levi becoming more distant towards you. He rarely told you about his day anymore, he avoided answering questions that were work related, and always seemed to be in a hurry of sorts. You also couldn't help but notice the things he started to say to you that he would never say before.

"I love you (f/n), I can't believe someone as kind as you could be with someone like me..."

You smiled your warm smile at him and said, "Don't say that honey, you mean so much more to me than you think..." You try to reach for his face to caress it but he recoils and quickly makes his way to the door, "Uh, I'll see you later. I have stuff to work on."

He makes his way out of your room but not before you call him out. "I can't believe you! You always do this! Since when have you been so busy that you have to work on your days off? And why don't you let me touch you anymore? What the hell is wrong, Levi?! You..." your voice shakes a little, "you're worrying me..."

Levi sighs in exasperation and turns around with an annoyed look on his face. "You want to have this conversation again?! I already told you, I'm busy! You wouldn't understand (f/n), all you're ever in charge of doing is opening up that mouth of yours and letting noise come out. What would you know, brat?"

Immediately Levi regrets his words. He sees his innocent girlfriend's eyes turn misty, clearly losing the will to fight tears. She has always been strong, especially because she had to grow in a very demeaning environment in Wall Sina with horrible people, but he has been breaking her strength everyday with his coldness that has gradually increased ever since...

And if in the moment you bite your lip

When I get you moaning you know it's real

Can you feel the pressure between your hips?

I'll make it feel like the first time

"I have something better to do than this, (f/n)."

He had left again without another word but this time, you weren't going to allow yourself to wallow in your sadness and suspicions. Something was up and you knew it. You decided you needed to get some fresh air. You walk out of the Survey Corps HQ and take in the night air. The air is crisp and slightly cold but you don't care. Whatever it takes to numb the pained feeling your heart carries as a burden in your heart is fine by you. You decide that one block around the entire building should be enough and proceed to walk. Then you hear it.

An almost inaudible bang could be heard throughout the breeze. You follow the sound and as you turn a corner, you search in front of you but see nothing at all. However the banging sound is not only a bit more louder, you hear what sounds like moans. Moans? You suddenly get the feeling that you should look up towards the building and you do. What you saw almost made you fall to your knees.

Petra, fully naked, was pressed up against a window... Levi's bedroom window. You squint and see the figure behind her that was pounding her was no other than your Levi.

He grips her hips tightly as his moans increase almost as loud as hers. At that moment, you finally understood why people say hearts break. Because you swear yours shattered almost loud enough for you to hear at that moment. Your suspicions were proven right at last, and out of all disgusting things he could have done to betray you he chose to cheat on you with Petra, out of all things!

Your mouth slowly drops and you feel tears ready to drop from your eyes, but you can't tear your eyes away from the sight. Levi, however, spotted you and his jaw drops in horror. Petra opens her own eyes and the look of pleasure is quickly replaced with a look of shock and fear.

So what do I do if I can't figure it out?

You got to try, try, try again, yeah.

So what do I do if I can't figure it out?

I'm gonna leave, leave, leave again

You do nothing. In fact, your tears almost dry instantly as they both look at you in a state of shock. Your lips form a thin line and after one last misty glance at Levi, you turn on your heel and walk away. Levi had quickly scooped up his clothes and turned away from the window, and you knew he was on his way to find you. So you walk away from the castle, make your way past town, and board the next available boat ready to sail towards your parents' farm. And you haven't looked back since.

It all made sense now.

Cause if you want to keep me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder

And if you really need me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder

Now here you were, facing Levi once again. Despite the packed room, it felt as if it was only the two of you in the room. He leans over his table, his glassy grey eyes widened and his thin lips slightly parted. Levi has the awful gut feeling that he knew where you were going with this. You look and see that he looks at you in despair and longing, his mouth forming out the word, "Please..."

You keep singing:

And if you really need me, you gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta, got to love me harder

Love me, love me, love me

Harder, harder, harder

Love me, love me, love me

just a little bit, harder, harder, baby,

Harder, harder, harder

He then sees that in your hand you clutched his letter to you. To his absolute disbelief, he sees you crumple the letter tighter and tighter in your fist, with his heart along with it.

You finish your song and despite the applause that is roaring in your ears, you don't smile. You stare down at Levi, knowing that he has finally heard you loud and clear after having remained in silence after all that time. To his astonishment, Levi sees you slowly turn into the cold, strong young woman who fiercely protected herself that you once were when he saved you from the King's castle.

Only this time, he wasn't saving you. You were saving yourself from him.

And you did.