We stood at the altar,
but neither of us could speak
Flowers dotted the landscape
and he just stared at us,
as if we were kids,
I wonder if he knew of the things
that I whispered in your ear often enough,
knew of the bitterness of our families and friends
I figured that he did then as slowly you turned to me
and our truth became rubble there
at that makeshift altar
Sunlight revealed it as so
I heard the soft gasp of your voice,
was used to only listen closely to you
and I wondered about the clouded look in your eyes
and the way you half-danced as if to escape
I cried when you turned away,
no one saw me
as you told that man
that you can't do it
I remembered tales of Vegas from Alfred,
who'd always been too close to Toris
and half-asked with just a head tilt
if we'd elope
I never wanted to give you up
yet I heard your soft,
'I can't,
I really can't.'
I wondered if you could hear my heart break
and then I caught your eyes,
the jewels that sought out him,
your brother
I stood tall
and before the crowds of people kissed you
as if I was saying my own goodbyes,
The man with us at the altar stared
as if he'd never seen anything like us before,
I smiled
for a moment,
I'd found you again
My lips were soft
when they marked our goodbyes
yet I felt even then that you'd come back
perhaps not to the altar
where our change waited
or to the meadow surrounding it,
full of bright colors,
flowers marking the day
I remembered how you pulled away,
didn't have the gall to act
as if I burned you
I knew then that you
still loved me
I heard the break in your voice
when you called everyone to attention,
the soft tone that I knew only I
had caught
I stood tall,
leaned forward
and whispered one last, broken
"I love you."
