DISCLAIMER: You all know the drill - Paramount is God. All hail Paramount. They own everything in the Star Trek Universe - I'm just using my overactive imagination to take their characters where they refuse to go. All in the name of fun, not profit (I wish)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: If I were one of TPTB, this might have been how I wrapped up the series. This takes place about two weeks after the events of "Workforce", and is consistent with canon up to that episode. It diverges after that, although I do make use of scenes and events from "Author, Author" and "Human Error" (don't worry, NO C/7!)
This started out as a single story, but it's now part of "The Long Road Home" trilogy, so look for the sequels: "Awakenings" and "Paradise Lost"
Now, on with the story. Enjoy!
SUMMARY: A Vaadawaur attack on the Delta Flyer leaves Chakotay presumed dead and Captain Janeway devastated.
THE LONG ROAD HOME
SEPARATIONS
CHAPTER ONE : THE FLYER
First Officer's Log, Delta Flyer, Stardate 54645.3 We've completed our trading mission with the Vanari and are preparing to return to Voyager with our cargo hold full. We're making a small detour to examine an asteroid cluster which may provide a useful source of polyferranide.
"I'm definitely reading what looks like polyferranide deposits," said Chakotay as he looked at his console. "But there's something in the asteroids that's interfering with sensors."
"I can bring us closer if you like," offered Tom at the helm.
"No thanks – I'd rather not have to try and dodge asteroids."
"Come on, Chakotay, I can handle it. Where's your sense of adventure?"
They were interrupted as Neelix approached from the back of the Flyer. "Would anyone else care for some lunch? I programmed my roasted chadre-kab into the replicator, and I added a few extra spices to give it some more flavor."
"Sounds great, Neelix," said Chakotay. He looked at Tom and raised an eyebrow.
Tom chuckled and turned around to his controls. "I take it back – you do have a sense of adventure."
Chakotay was about to reply when a beep at his console got his attention. "I'm picking up some gravimetric distortions."
Tom frowned, checking his own console. "I'm reading them too…can you localize them?"
"I'll try…looks like about 20,000 kilometers off the port nacelle. Wait – I'm getting something else." His eyes widened as he examined the sensor readings. "It looks like a ship!"
"Got it," said Tom, "But where the hell did it come from?"
"It's a Vaadwaur ship!" exclaimed Neelix, looking at his own console at Tactical.
"Raise shields! Try hailing them, Tom."
"Hailing on all subspace channels." The console chirped. "No response."
"They're powering weapons – evasive maneuvers!"
"I'm on it," muttered Tom as he deftly maneuvered the Delta Flyer in to a starboard roll just in time to avoid the first volley of phaser fire from the Vaadwaur ship. His next moves weren't fast enough, though, and the following shot connected with the back of the Delta Flyer, shaking the front compartment.
"Neelix?"
"Shields are holding. Some minor damage to the power relays, but we're still in one piece."
"Return fire and target their weapons array."
The phasers on the Flyer powered up and fired at the larger Vaadwaur vessel, but it continued to pound the smaller ship. This time, the damage was more severe and an EPS conduit blew just behind Neelix.
"No effect, Commander. They're still firing."
"Understood. Tom, can we – " Chakotay was interrupted as another blast rocked the Delta Flyer, throwing him out of his seat.
"Shields at 67 percent. They took out the primary phaser couplings. I'm switching to backup," reported Neelix.
"Tom, get us out of here!" yelled Chakotay as he pulled himself back into his seat.
"I can't!" he yelled back. "That last shot knocked the reactant injectors offline. They'll have to be realigned before we can go to warp. One of you will have to go down there and do it – " The Delta Flyer shook as another Vaadwaur shot connected. " – preferably before we get vaporized here. They're right on top of us…I can't outmaneuver them for much longer."
"I'll go," said Chakotay. "Keep targeting their weapons array and send a distress call to Voyager." He ran towards the back of the Delta Flyer and started down the stairs.
Tom reached for one of the buttons in from of him. "Voyager, this is the Delta Flyer. We are under attack by a Vaadwaur ship and have sustained damage. We require immediate assistance repeat we require immediate assistance."
On board the attacking ship, one of the Vaadwaur was staring intently at a wire-frame image of the Delta Flyer. He leaned forward to confirm his readings, then turned to his superior.
"He's on the move, Commander. He's in the lower deck near the front section."
"Good work, Vaudrin. Let me know if he leaves that location," replied the other alien. "Prepare the transporter and coordinate the final assault." He walked to his chair in the center of the bridge and sat in it. "The High Command insists that this proceed flawlessly, and I intend to see that it does."
In the front of the Delta Flyer, Tom was working furiously to avoid the onslaught from the Vaadwaur ship, while Neelix was trying to keep the shields up.
Secondary phaser couplings are offline, announced the computer.
"I'm switching to photon torpedoes," he reported as the ship was jostled again. "Shields are down to 25 percent – one more hit and they're going to buckle!"
"Chakotay, we need warp and we need it now!" Tom yelled at his commbadge.
In the lower level of the Flyer, Chakotay lay on his side in a Jeffries tube as he stared at the reactant injectors. "I'm going as fast as I can," he muttered through his teeth.
The Delta Flyer rocked as another Vaadwaur shot hit the ship. "We're loosing shields!" yelled Neelix "I'll try and – " Neelix didn't finish the sentence as his console exploded, throwing him backwards.
"Neelix? NEELIX! Damn it!" Tom turned around in an effort to check on him but wasn't able to tell if he was okay before he had to turn his attention back to piloting the ship. "Chakotay!"
Almost got it. Give me another 20 seconds.
Tom was about to respond when the shields buckled and equipment began exploding around him.
"Their shields are down," announced one of the Vaadwaur.
Commander Takken turned to the pilot of his ship. "Take us under them. Make sure we have a good shot at the ventral section. We'll have to take it out quickly."
"Yes, sir."
The Vaadwaur ship moved quickly, circling around from behind the Delta Flyer until it was heading directly for it. It then dove and leveled off so that it would pass beneath the Flyer.
"Prepare to initiate the pulse and have the transporters and weapons standing by. We'll only get one chance at this."
Tom was waiting for Chakotay's signal to go to warp when he noticed an energy buildup on one of his monitors. "What the…" There was a bright flash of light as the entire Delta Flyer glowed with a massive energy discharge. The last thing he remembered before he lost consciousness was being thrown sideways as the Delta Flyer took a massive hit. He did not hear the warnings that the computer chirped at him. Warning – hull breach detected. Emergency forcefields are in place. Main power is offline. Emergency power only. The navigational array is offline. The subspace communications array is offline…
On the Vaadwaur ship, Vaudrin turned away from his station. "Transport complete. We were nearly perfectly synchronized. We took him only .05 seconds before the impact. It's unlikely their sensors would have detected it."
"Good," replied Commander Takken. "The High Command will not be pleased if Voyager comes looking for him later."
* * *
On Voyager, Captain Janeway exited the turbolift and acknowledged Tuvok as he gave up her chair and moved to the Tactical station. "Report," she barked.
"We received a distress call from the Delta Flyer…at least I think it's a distress call. It's pretty garbled," replied Ensign Kim.
"Let's hear it."
The Captain heard what sounded like Tom Paris' voice, but she couldn't be sure with all the static.
V..ger, this……lyer. We are…nder…tack by………aur ship and…………damage. We require immediate……peat………immediate……V...ger, this ……lyer…
Janeway frowned and moved towards Harry's station at Ops. "It certainly sounds like they're in trouble. We've got to clear that up. Try narrowing the filter bandwidth."
The transmission was more distinct this time. "Again," ordered Janeway.
Voyager, this…the Delta Flyer. We are...der attack by a Vaadwaur ship and have sus……d damage. We require immediate assist…..repeat we require immediate assistance.
"Harry, have you got the coordinates?"
"Yes ma'am. They're less than a light year from here. We could be there in a couple of hours."
"Set a course, maximum warp." She turned to Tuvok. "We're a long way from the Vaadwaur planet that we encountered. I guess it's safe to assume that they're using the subspace tunnels."
"That would be a logical conclusion, Captain. However, I do not know what motive they would have in attacking the away team."
"Perhaps they are adapting," commented Seven of Nine.
"Seven?" queried the Captain.
"You yourself said that they were a resourceful species and that they would adapt. Perhaps they are compensating for their outdated technology by taking newer technology from other, more advanced races."
"If their technology is out of date, it would be…inefficient to try and take technology from tactically superior races," pointed out Tuvok. Seven raised an eyebrow at his choice of words but made no response.
"Perhaps," interjected Janeway, "But remember, Tuvok, that they may have the network of subspace tunnels at their disposal. From what we've learned, very few species are even aware of their existence, much less able to use them."
"The element of surprise would give them a considerable tactical advantage," conceded Tuvok.
They all considered this for a few moments in silence until Seven spoke up.
"From what I have observed of Lieutenant Paris' piloting skills and the capabilities of the Delta Flyer, I do not believe that surprise alone would give the Vaadwaur a significant advantage."
Janeway smiled at her comment. "That's the kind of thinking I like to hear. I'll be in my ready room. Tuvok, you have the bridge."
Only when she had achieved the safety and privacy of the ready room did she allow herself to draw in a shaky breath and worry about the fate of the Delta Flyer – and more specifically, the fate of her First Officer.
* * *
Captain, we are approaching the coordinates of the Delta Flyer.
Tuvok's voice through her commbadge startled Captain Janeway out of her train of thought.
"Acknowledged," she replied as she took one last sip of coffee and got off her couch to go to the bridge.
"Take us out of warp," she told the helm. "Any sign of them, Harry?"
Harry frowned as he looked at his console. "I've got them on sensors, but I'm having trouble locking onto anything. There's some kind of interference all over the hull and it's wreaking havoc with the sensors."
"On screen," Janeway ordered. The entire bridge crew fell silent as the image of the battered Delta Flyer filled the viewscreen. The angle of the smaller ship concealed the massive damage it had sustained to the front, but what they could see was enough to make them all draw in a sharp breath. There were dozens of scorch marks all over the wings. The superstructure was visible in a few places where the blasts had vaporized the hull plating, and the very back of the Flyer showed signs of an explosion. It was obvious why the sensors were having difficulty – there was what looked like small electric currents snaking around the Flyer occasionally, making the hull glow.
"Lifesigns?"
It was barely a whisper, but everyone on the bridge could hear the Captain's question.
There was dead silence as everyone waited for Harry's analysis. They could hear his fingers flying over the console in an attempt to get sensor readings. "I – I can't tell. I've got two for sure … I think." Harry hit his console in frustration. "I don't know, Captain."
B'Elanna, becoming increasingly nervous at the lack of information given the ominous image on the viewscreen, jumped up from the engineering station. "Can you get a transporter lock on them, Harry?"
Harry shook his head. "Not until we do something about the interference."
"Tractor the Flyer into the shuttle bay," ordered the Captain. "We'll get them out from there."
"Aye, Captain."
"As soon as we've got them, take us out of here. I don't want to be hanging around if the Vaadwaur decide to come back. Tuvok, keep us on tactical alert until further notice." Her voice dropped and she said quietly, "I'll be in the shuttle bay." She nodded at B'Elanna to join her as she headed to the turbolift. B'Elanna gave her a grateful look and followed her. As soon as the doors were closed, B'Elanna leaned against the wall of the turbolift and closed her eyes.
"Deck ten," Janeway ordered, then hit her commbadge. "Janeway to Sickbay."
Sickbay here, Captain, replied the Doctor.
"We're bringing the Delta Flyer in. Meet us in Shuttle Bay Two."
On my way, came the reply.
B'Elanna looked up sharply when the Captain called the Doctor. The Captain could see the fear in her eyes and reached out to give her arm a reassuring squeeze. "I'm sure Tom will be just fine, B'Elanna." B'Elanna closed her eyes again and nodded in response.
They stood in silence for a moment before B'Elanna looked up and turned to the Captain with a hint of a smile on her lips. "I'm sure Chakotay's all right too, Captain."
Janeway looked up, startled – she had just been trying to convince herself of the same thing. B'Elanna's smile widened at the Captain's astonishment.
The Captain realized she was just standing there staring. "I hope all three of them are safe," she replied uneasily. She then quickly changed the subject. "Are there transport enhancers in the shuttle bay? They might help us cut through the interference on the hull if we need to." B'Elanna nodded her acknowledgement.
They exited the turbolift and walked quickly down the corridor towards the shuttle bay. The doors opened to reveal the Delta Flyer being towed into position with the nose facing the shuttle bay doors. The extensive scorching and damage to the Flyer stopped them in their tracks for a moment, but it only took a few seconds for the two women to snap into action.
"Let's get that rear door open!" barked Janeway as she strode towards the Flyer.
B'Elanna turned around as she followed the Captain. "Somebody grab those pattern enhancers," she ordered, pointing to a far corner of the shuttle bay. Behind her, the shuttle bay doors opened and the Doctor entered. Seeing B'Elanna and the Captain, he hurried towards them.
Janeway and another crewman opened the back door of the Flyer. She entered, and the Doctor and B'Elanna followed close behind as she ducked under a hanging piece of conduit and made her way towards the front of the shuttle. The interior was filled with hazy smoke but the air was breathable.
Neelix was laying on the floor behind his tactical station. The Captain kneeled next to him and felt his neck for a pulse. It was there, but she could see that he had some fairly bad burns on his face. It looked like his console had exploded. The Doctor was there immediately, running a medical tricorder over him.
"He's got some minor internal injuries and a few second-degree burns to his upper body, but nothing that can't be easily treated," reported the Doctor.
Janeway nodded and stood up, casting a nervous glance towards the empty seat at the other station – Chakotay's station. You don't have time to think like that, she warned herself. Shaking off her uneasiness, she moved towards the front of the Flyer and down the ramp to Tom's chair. He was still in it, but he was slumped over sideways. His pulse was strong and he didn't have any visible injuries. B'Elanna made her way down the ramp and moved toward the other side of Tom's chair.
"Is he…" B'Elanna's voice broke and she couldn't bring herself to finish the question.
"He's just unconscious," answered the Captain. B'Elanna helped her sit him up in his chair and Janeway gently shook his shoulder. "Tom? Tom, can you hear me?"
B'Elanna took one of his hands and gently touched his face. "Come on, Tom," pleaded his wife.
Tom groaned softly and slowly moved his head before opening his eyes. B'Elanna gasped and closed her eyes with relief.
"It's all right, Tom, you're back on Voyager. Are you hurt?" asked the Captain.
"I…don't think so," he mumbled, "Although it does feel like a someone landed a shuttle on my head."
"What happened, Lieutenant?"
"A Vaadwaur ship came out of nowhere. They were right on top of us – they took out the phasers and the shields and we couldn't get warp…" He paused as a thought occurred to him. "What about Neelix and Chakotay?"
"Mr. Neelix will be fine," responded the Doctor as he approached. "They'll beam him to Sickbay as soon as the transport enhancers are in place."
"Where's Chakotay? We haven't found him." Despite her best effort, the Captain was unable to keep the concern out of her voice.
"He was…down below…in a Jeffries tube. He was trying to realign the reactant injectors so we could go to warp. He was almost finished when we were hit by some kind of energy pulse and took another phaser hit. That's the last thing I remember."
Captain Janeway moved aside to let the Doctor examine Tom and moved toward the back of the shuttle. B'Elanna gave Tom's hand another squeeze and followed the Captain. She made her way around the crewmen who were setting up transport enhancers around Neelix's unconscious form, and tried with some difficulty to keep from running to the back of the Flyer. Please let him be all right, she prayed. Please don't let me lose him. The last thought took her by surprise but she ignored it as she went down the stairs. She could hear B'Elanna behind her as she stepped off the stairs and walked to the Jeffries tube that led to the reactant injectors.
B'Elanna followed her as she crawled through it, but when they neared the front of the Flyer, they both stopped in their tracks, horrified.
Instead of the Jeffries tube, they were greeted with a view of the shuttle bay through a huge gaping hole in the hull.
The breach was massive, encompassing the entire width of the Flyer. There were burn marks all along the edge of the hole, and pieces of conduit, wiring and superstructure were visible around the perimeter.
The two women stood frozen in place. Captain Janeway couldn't believe what she was looking at. This is not possible. This is not happening, she thought as she looked at the gaping hole in the belly of the Flyer. She sat down and leaned on the bulkhead beside her to steady herself. She was overwhelmed by the wave of emotions that suddenly descended on her. Everything around her seemed to fall away. There was nobody around her, there was no ship. Only her. Alone. She was aware of nothing but her grief, her pain, her longing. Her loss. He was gone -- how could he be gone? He couldn't leave her. She couldn't go on without him. She allowed herself to give into her emotions for a few seconds before the sound of the Doctor coming up behind her reminded her of her duties. I can deal with this later, she thought.
When B'Elanna recovered from the initial shock, she quickly looked over at Captain Janeway. She was completely motionless, and all the color had drained from her face. B'Elanna could see the pain and horror in her eyes, and for a moment she was surprised – it was very rare that the Captain let her guard down enough to let her emotions show on her face. B'Elanna didn't even finish the thought before she heard the Doctor coming up behind them in the tube and saw the Captain straighten her shoulders and hide her apparent distress.
"Does Commander Chakotay require medical atten…." The Doctor's voice trailed off as he looked at the hull breach and the faces of the Chief Engineer and the Captain. "Was the Commander…"
The Captain's voice was shaky, but she managed to answer the Doctor nevertheless. "He was working on the reactant injectors… they're…they were…about two meters in front of the forcefield." As she spoke, she entered commands on the console next to her and the emergency forcefield deactivated. "Doctor, you're needed in Sickbay. Tom is probably anxious to see you, B'Elanna."
The other two looked at each other.
"Are you sure, Captain? I mean, I'm sure Tom will understand," B'Elanna said quietly.
"I'll be fine, Lieutenant. Go."
Reluctantly, they turned around and left her alone.
How can he be gone? She leaned with her back against the wall and her knees pulled to her chest and put her head back until it was resting against the wall as well. How can I do this alone? She felt tears welling up behind her eyes, but she wouldn't allow herself to cry now. Not in front of the crew.
She took a few deep breaths before she moved toward the back of the Flyer. She hit her commbadge. "Janeway to the bridge."
Tuvok here, Captain.
"Status?"
We are moving away from the Delta Flyer's last position at Warp 6.
"No sign of any Vaadwaur ships?"
None, Captain. May I inquire as to the status of the away team?
"Mr. Paris and Neelix were injured but not seriously…" She trailed off and waited for what she knew would come next.
And Commander Chakotay?
She took a deep breath before she answered, trying to keep the tremor out of her voice. "The section of the Flyer that he was in was badly damaged…there was a hull breach. There's no sign of him…we believe that he was killed in the attack."
Everyone on the bridge froze when they heard this announcement over the comm. Nobody, most of all Tuvok, knew what to say. There were a few moments of silence before Tuvok finally responded.
"I am…sorry, Captain."
Thank you, Tuvok. I'm on my way to the bridge. Janeway out.
The bridge crew showed some surprise at this. They all knew that the Captain would be deeply affected by the loss of her First Officer, and most had expected that she would retreat to her quarters to avoid the crew.
* * *
In sickbay, Tom was sitting on a biobed as the Doctor ran a medical tricorder over him.
"You seem to be in one piece, Mr. Paris. Whatever that discharge was that you described, it didn't cause any permanent damage." He reached for a hypospray and applied it to Tom's neck. "However, if you experience any headaches or dizziness, let me know immediately. Otherwise, you're cleared for duty."
"I guess I'll see you tomorrow then Doc – 0800, isn't it?" Tom replied, trying to lighten the mood. He knew for a fact that his Sickbay shift started at 0600, but he always liked to rile the Doctor by pretending to forget what time his shift started. When the Doctor absentmindedly replied in the affirmative to his comment, Tom knew something was wrong. He had noticed that B'Elanna looked upset, but he had assumed that she was just worried. He began to wonder if there was something more. He waited for a few seconds while the Doctor was working on a PADD, but then he couldn't stand it any longer.
"Will somebody tell me what's going on?"
B'Elanna and the Doctor looked up at him in surprise, then stole a glance at each other.
"For crying out loud!" said Tom, jumping off the biobed. "You two have been acting weird since you came in here. What is it? Have I got the Terrilium Plague or something?"
"Apart from your vivid imagination, you're fine, Mr. Paris."
Tom looked at him suspiciously, then looked at his wife. "B'Elanna, come on. Tell me what's wrong." He stepped forward and gently stroked her arm.
The Doctor suddenly excused himself to go check on Neelix.
"Tom…maybe you'd better sit down," she said, moving with him towards the biobed. "I have some bad news."
* * *
Captain Janeway exited the turbolift and walked onto the bridge. "Status, Tuvok."
"Still no sign of any Vaadwaur ships, Captain. We have resumed our previous course."
She acknowledged him and turned to Ensign Kim. "Ensign, I want you to go over the Delta Flyer's sensor logs. I want to know what happened out there."
"Yes, ma'am," he responded as he moved to leave the bridge.
Captain Janeway composed herself before she addressed Tuvok again. "I don't suppose there's any reason to keep this from the crew. See that they're notified, Tuvok. I'll be in my ready room."
With that, she retreated to the privacy of her room where she walked unsteadily across the room and collapsed on the couch.
She could no longer hold off all the emotions and thoughts that rushed on her now. Although she had managed to maintain her composure in front of the crew, all her self-restraint seemed to evaporate in the solitude of her ready room. She no longer felt like a Captain who had lost a valued officer – she felt like a woman who had just lost her best friend, confidante, and… Her emotions overwhelmed her and she was unable to bring herself to finish the thought.
She had always known that she would be deeply affected if anything had ever happened to Chakotay, but she had never imagined feeling a grief this intense. One of the reasons that she had told herself that she could not become involved with her First Officer was because of this kind of situation. She had convinced herself that it was better this way in case anything ever happened to either of them. She had seen this first-hand, or at least hallucinated it, when she and Chakotay had crashed in the Sacajawea and she had seen him grieving over her body. If she kept him at arm's length, she had reasoned, then she would be able to go on if he was ever killed.
I guess my reasoning was flawed, she thought sadly.
She realized now that having kept him at bay had done nothing to relieve her grief. She couldn't imagine feeling his loss any more than she already did. In fact, her inaction had made it infinitely worse. Now, she had to deal with many more issues. She had lost probably the most important person in her life, and this realization in itself was somewhat of a surprise. She had told him once that she couldn't imagine a day without him, and she realized now, too late, how much she had meant that. The most important person in my life…was that what he was to me? When it hit her that he was that and so much more, she was overcome by grief and remorse. The tears that she could feel welling up behind her eyes, however, refused to come out. Even now, she found herself unable to let out her grief - her sense of control was still too strong for her to let go and cry.
Her grief was not lessened, however, by her inability to cry, and what made it all worse was one thing that she hadn't considered when she was trying to justify keeping him at bay – her regret. Not only was she grieving for the loss of her closest friend, she had to deal with the fact that he would never know how she felt about him. She regretted that she had never told him, she regretted that she hadn't known how deep her feelings were for him, and she regretted that she had pushed him away. The past six years all seemed so empty now, when she considered what she could have had. What she couldn't have now. The memories that sufaced in quick succession at this thought were not pleasant recollections from their years spent together, but rather instances where she had pushed him away. So many opportunities ignored, so many chances not taken. There seemed to be more than she could count. There had been so many times that she had wanted to be closer to him, but her sense of duty had always won out and she had ended up rebuffing his gentle advances and pushing him away. And now she was truly alone.
* * *
B'Elanna entered the shuttle bay and moved towards the Delta Flyer. "Harry? You in there?"
"Over here," he answered as he came out the back of the Flyer. "How's Tom?"
"Sleeping. The Doctor told him to get some rest."
"You want to give me a hand with the sensor logs?"
"Sure."
They entered the Delta Flyer and began working on downloading the sensor logs from the damaged systems. They were silent for a few minutes, only talking when necessary, until Harry broke the uncomfortable silence.
"How's the Captain taking it?"
B'Elanna's looked at him sharply. "How do you think she's taking it? She's upset, devastated – what did you expect?"
Ashamed, Harry turned back to his work. "Sorry I asked," he muttered.
B'Elanna took a deep breath. "No, Harry, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. It's just…"
"I know," said Harry, reaching over and putting his hand on her shoulder. "He was your friend. He was mine too. We're all upset. I'm…I was just worried about the Captain, that's all."
"Me too," B'Elanna sighed. "I mean, look at us. We're talking about it, helping each other out. Who's going to help her? If it was anyone else, she'd turn to Chakotay, but now…what's she going to do, grieve with Tuvok?"
Harry snorted. "Somehow I don't think that will do her much good." He paused. "What about Seven?"
Now it was B'Elanna's turn to snort. "Oh, right, the Borg approach to grieving. That'll do wonders. 'His death is irrelevant. We will adapt.' Real great, Harry."
"No, I'm serious. Seven may not be the most sensitive person on board, but she and the Captain are pretty close. If we talked to her first, she might actually be able to help."
"I don't know…I can't see her opening up to Seven."
After a moment, Ensign Kim had a new thought. "What about you or Tom? We used to call you her 'personal reclamation projects.' She might talk to you guys…especially you, B'Elanna, since you were close to him."
B'Elanna considered this for a moment. "I'll give it some thought."
"How did Tom take the news?"
"Not well. He and Chakotay had really hit it off since we got married and since I found out I was pregnant. I could actually see them as good friends…" Her voice broke and she paused before she continued. "Tom blames himself. He thought that if he'd been faster or seen them coming or..."
"It's not Tom's fault. They were facing a huge warship. I can't believe he and Neelix made it back okay and with the Delta Flyer mostly intact."
"Try telling that to Tom. He's always been a master at blaming himself. He'll be kicking himself until the Captain straightens him out. She's usually good at pulling him out of his own misery."
"I'll try to talk to him, too – not that he ever listens to me."
B'Elanna smiled. "There's a first time for everything. Listen, if you've got this under control, I for one am going to take your advice. I'll go try and talk to Captain Janeway. She'll want to see the initial sensor analysis anyway."
"Good luck."
"Thanks – I'll probably need it."
* * *
The chime on her ready room door startled Captain Janeway out of her thoughts. Who could that be? she wondered. She hoped she looked halfway decent, but just in case she wiped her eyes and ran her fingers through her hair. The door chimed again. "Come."
She was surprised to see her Chief Engineer come through the door. "What can I do for you, Lieutenant?"
B'Elanna winced at the use of her title – that was not a good sign for the conversation she had in mind. You could always tell what kind of mood the Captain was in by how she addressed her crew. Her choosing to remain formal probably meant that she was all business right now, something that would make what B'Elanna intended a lot more difficult. Nevertheless, she took a deep breath and addressed the Captain. "I've got some of the initial sensor readings from the Flyer. I thought you'd want to see them."
Janeway nodded and motioned for B'Elanna to sit down on the couch beside her. She waited for her to begin.
"From what I've got so far, it looks like the Vaadwaur came out of one of the subspace tunnels almost right on top of the Flyer. They must have been waiting for them, because it sure doesn't look like just a coincidence. They came out of there firing." Janeway frowned at this information, and B'Elanna continued, "Tom was able to keep them away from the worst of it for a while, but they started losing primary systems and then warp went offline. They lost shields and then were hit with some kind of pulse which rendered them all unconscious. A few seconds later, the computer records a hull breach." She paused and looked at the Captain. She was concentrating on the PADD in her hands and trying to stay composed. "Uh...that's all we'll know until Harry finishes reconstructing the data."
"Tell Seven to give him a hand," she said, handing the PADD back to B'Elanna.
"Yes, Captain." The engineer rose to leave, and moved away from the couch and down the two stairs to the main part of the room. When she reached it, however, she stopped and turned to face Janeway again. She was still sitting on the couch, with one elbow propped on the back of the couch and her chin resting in her hand, looking out the window.
"Captain?" Startled, Captain Janeway turned around to look at B'Elanna.
"Was there something else, Lieutenant?"
Again with the title, but B'Elanna plunged forward anyway. "Just…I wanted to…I wanted to let you know that if you need to talk…" The Captain turned back towards the window in an attempt to keep herself from falling apart. B'Elanna continued, "He…He was my friend too."
Captain Janeway's composure visibly melted and she turned around in her seat to give B'Elanna a warm, affectionate smile. "I know he was. He was very proud of you, you know."
B'Elanna's eyes filled with tears and she looked down at her feet. "I know," she whispered. She turned to leave, but the Captain's voice made her stop and turn around.
"Thank you for the offer, Lieutenant. I'll…keep it in mind." B'Elanna smiled and nodded, then turned and left the ready room, leaving the Captain to continue staring out the window.
* * *
At the end of her shift the next day, B'Elanna handed the warp core diagnostic she was running over to Lieutenant Carey and headed for the mess hall. She entered a turbolift and leaned against the back wall, feeling close to tears. What a miserable day, she thought. And it's not even over yet. The turbolift stopped and she was surprised when Captain Janeway entered. The Captain was obviously surprised too.
"B'Elanna! I was just on my way to Engineering to look for you."
"My shift is over so I was on my way to the mess hall…unless you'd rather go someplace quieter?" she added tentatively, hoping that the Captain had decided to take her up on her offer.
"No, the mess hall's fine." Her voice softened as she turned to her chief engineer. "How are you holding up?"
"I'll live. How about you?"
"I've seen better days." They both smiled sadly at her casual understatement. The turbolift stopped and they headed for the mess hall. B'Elanna got a bowl of soup, and they chose a quiet corner where they could talk in private. B'Elanna slowly tasted her soup while she waited for the Captain to begin.
"I've been thinking about…some of the things that have to be done around here…and I was hoping that I could count on you to make the arrangements for Chakotay's memorial service."
B'Elanna froze with her spoon halfway to her mouth before slowly putting it down. Before she could answer, the Captain continued.
"I'd take care of it but I'm not familiar with the customs of his people, and I thought that you might be since you've known him for so long…"
"I'd be honored to, Captain."
"Thank you." Giving B'Elanna's shoulder a maternal squeeze, she rose and turned to leave.
"Captain." Janeway turned back around. "I meant what I said earlier…my door's always open if you need to talk."
"Thank you, B'Elanna."
B'Elanna watched her go with a small smile on her face. At least this time, she had called her by her name. Definitely a promising sign.
Neelix also watched the Captain leave, then made his way over to B'Elanna's table and sat down at her invitation.
"How's the Captain holding up?"
"Good enough that I have no idea how to answer that." She paused and took another spoonful of soup. "If she were a mess I'd be able to tell, but…she's pulled herself together just enough to hide it from the rest of us. For a minute after…after we realized what had happened I thought I could see through her tough exterior and she was devastated. But it was only there for a second before we were interrupted and she was the unflappable Captain again."
"Sounds like her. She's a strong person – I'm sure she'll be all right." He leaned forward. "It's the rest of the crew that I'm worried about. This is going to crush the morale on the ship."
B'Elanna thought about that for a moment. "You're right about the rest of the crew, but the Captain…I don't know. Normally I'd agree with you, but normally she has Chakotay to help her through stuff like this. I think she relied on him more than any of us realized. If I thought that she'd rely on any of us like that, it would be different, but I don't think she does. Maybe Tuvok, but he won't be much help."
"Well, at least she knows that we're here if she needs us."
* * *
Chakotay groaned as he started to come to. He tried to lift his head off the cold floor pressing against his cheek and realized he had a splitting headache. After laying still for a few more moments, he opened his eyes. It took him a few seconds to realize that he was no longer on the Delta Flyer. What happened? he wondered. I had just about got the reactant injectors aligned when…there was a bright flash of light. He remembered feeling a tingling sensation, then nothing. The lighting was dim and his eyes were still unfocused, so he couldn't tell where he was. He pushed himself off the cold metal floor and reached for his commbadge but felt nothing except his uniform. Feeling his way around, he came into contact with a wall and leaned against it. He could feel a cut on his forehead. After a few minutes of sitting like this, the lights came on suddenly, causing him to squint in pain. When he opened his eyes, he could see that he was in a small cell in what looked like a ship. Three Vaadwaur were standing at the entrance to his cell.
"Commander…I see you're more responsive. I am Commander Takken of the Vaadwaur Imperium."
"What do you want from me? Where's my crew?" he demanded
"Your two companions? I should think that they are back on Voyager by now. You can join them – provided, of course, you cooperate."
"What do you want?"
Takken glared at him. "You appear to be an intellectually challenged race – I should have thought that was obvious. We want Voyager."
"You'll get it soon enough – just not in the way you think. If I know Captain Janeway, she's probably tracking you already."
"Don't be so foolish as to expect a rescue attempt. We destroyed part of your ship after we beamed you out. Voyager will believe that you are dead. You are our prisoner until you either cooperate or until we…dispose of you."
* * *
Captain's Log, Stardate 54660.5 It's now been 5 days since the attack on the Delta Flyer, and life on Voyager is starting to return to some semblance of normal after Commander Chakotay's memorial service, although even I can see that the crew morale is suffering. We are all feeling the loss of my First Officer. I've put Seven and Harry in charge of an investigation into the attack on the Delta Flyer to determine what happened.
In the conference room, the senior staff was gathered to hear the findings from the Delta Flyer's sensor logs.
Seven was proceeding through the sequence of the attack. "Mr. Neelix then switched to the backup phaser couplings. The same shot also disabled the warp drive when the reactant injectors were damaged. The distress call was sent to Voyager and Commander Chakotay went below to attempt to realign the injectors. The next Vaadwaur shot disabled the backup phaser couplings and took the shields down to 25 percent. Mr. Neelix's console exploded and soon afterwards the shields buckled." She called up a display on the wall of the conference room. "The Vaadwaur ship then emitted a neurolytic energy pulse that overloaded the consoles in the Flyer, rendered the crew unconscious, and caused the interference that we discovered upon our arrival. The Vaadwaur ship fired again, causing the hull breach in the Jeffries tube and disabling most of the primary systems."
"It's lucky a hull breach of that magnitude didn't destroy the Flyer completely," commented B'Elanna.
"I noticed that as well," responded Seven. "However, before his console exploded, Mr. Neelix must have known that the failure of the shields was imminent, because he managed to reroute all available power to structural integrity." She gave Neelix a look of approval and added, "A move which no doubt saved the Delta Flyer."
"Is there any doubt that Commander Chakotay was on the lower deck when it breached?" asked the Doctor.
Seven entered commands on the screen while she answered the Doctor. "Unfortunately, no. Sensors show him in that location immediately prior to the breach."
"The ironic thing," said Harry, "Is that he did it. Sensors show that the reactant injectors were realigned about two seconds before the last shot breached the hull."
They all considered this in silence for a moment before Tom slammed his fist into the table. "If I'd been paying attention to the displays I would have known that! I could have gone to warp and none of this would have happened!"
"Tom…" began his wife, who was sitting beside him, but he cut her off with a wave of his hand.
"Whether you noticed or not was irrelevant," pointed out Seven. "The injectors were not functioning until after the neurolytic pulse had been fired. If you had engaged the warp drive, you could not have remained conscious to pilot the Flyer you would most likely all have been killed."
This was little comfort to Tom, and he sat back in his chair with his arms crossed.
"What happened to the Vaadwaur ship?" Tuvok asked.
Harry pulled up another display on the screen. "We can't be sure because the sensors were badly damaged after the attack, but we have what looks like another set of gravimetric distortions about a minute after the last shot. Looks like they went back into the tunnels."
Tuvok had something else on his mind. "Did you find any reason for their attack?"
"No," replied Harry. "Maybe they're still mad that we helped out the Turei back when we woke them up. A simple case of revenge."
"They question isn't why they attacked, it's why they left."
Until this point, the Captain had been unusually quiet, so all heads turned towards her when she finally spoke. They looked back and forth at each other, confused by her question.
"Captain?" said Harry.
She leaned forward on her elbows and looked around the table. "They had the Delta Flyer dead in the water. Why turn tail and leave?" The crew looked at each other, still puzzled.
"If Seven is right and they were after technology," she continued, "Why leave without taking any? We know they have transporters, and the Flyer's shields were down, so they could have made off with a cargo bay full of technology – but they didn't. If Harry's right and they were out for revenge, why leave without destroying the Flyer? One more shot and it probably would have been debris – but as soon as the Flyer was vulnerable, they ran off. Why?" She leaned back in her seat. "Something about this seems off."
The only response came from Tuvok on her right. "Perhaps they detected the distress signal and retreated to avoid a confrontation with Voyager."
"Perhaps," she replied. Seeing that there were no more forthcoming suggestions, she ended the meeting.
Tuvok stayed behind, but before she talked to him, she motioned for Seven to stay as well. She picked up a PADD with Seven's report on it and addressed her. "I'm curious, Seven. What you said about the extra power that was rerouted to structural integrity – you don't think the Flyer would have remained intact without it? It seems to me that it was built to withstand that kind of damage."
Seven considered before responding. "It is possible…but Mr. Neelix does not need to know that."
Janeway melted, and gave Seven a smile. "Understood. Good work, Seven."
She waited until Seven had left, then turned to Tuvok. "Well, spit it out."
"Captain?"
"You've got that look on your face like we're going to have a discussion neither of us is going to enjoy."
Tuvok's eyebrow went up. "A look, Captain?"
She sighed and continued staring at him.
"I was merely curious, Captain, as to why you are concerned about the Vaadwaur's hasty departure. They are unpredictable, yet you seem to believe that their unexplained retreat shows some kind of deceit."
"It's just a hunch – I have a bad feeling about all this." She stopped and turned to him with a sigh. "You think I'm reaching, don't you?" It was more of a statement than a question, but he answered nevertheless.
"I believe that you are trying to discredit our findings in an attempt to shed doubt on Commander Chakotay's presumed death."
"You think I'm in denial?" she said incredulously.
"I am uncertain."
She tried to calm down and squeezed the bridge of her nose in an attempt to ward off the pulsing headache that she could feel coming on.
"I'm not in denial, Tuvok. I'm just…trying to understand what happened. It's in my nature to question all the facts." She looked up at him and put her hand on his arm. "But thank you for your concern."
He nodded and left the conference room.
She sat down in her chair at the conference table and looked around at all the other empty chairs.
You are not alone, he had said to her more than once.
It sure as hell feels that way, she thought.
