Leaving
A/N - I have written before but this is my first Robin/Marian fic. This is set before Robin leaves to go to the Holy Land, when he and Marian are betrothed and Edward is Sheriff. I've guessed Robin's age. Please let me know what you think.
We were young and in love - I was sixteen and Robin was twenty one - and we were betrothed to be married. My father was the Sheriff of Nottingham and Robin was Lord of Locksley. I thought we were going to get married and begin the rest of our lives together in the near future - or at least I did.
I looked out of the window of my bedchamber and saw Robin dismounting from his horse in the courtyard. I left the room and met him in the entrance hall where I greeted him with a kiss. Robin pulled away and I knew immediately that something was wrong. He looked nervous and worried and he seemed to be in a hurry as he pulled me away from where two guards were stood talking.
We stepped behind a pillar and I began to feel the first prickles of tension myself. "What's wrong, Robin?" I asked.
Robin placed his hands on either side of my face and looked deeply into my eyes. "Marian, I want you to know that this isn't what I want to do but what I must."
"Robin, you're worrying me now. What is it?"
"I'm leaving. The King has left for the Holy Land and I must go with him," said Robin as he looked away.
I pulled myself from Robin's grasp. "Why?" I asked. "Why do you need to go with him?"
"He's in danger and he needs protecting. I'll join his private guard when we get to Acre and so will Much."
"Surely he will be well enough protected without you having to join him in battle," I protested.
"A man must fight for his country!" exclaimed Robin. "A man must protect his King!"
"You want the glory, don't you?" I asked quietly. "That's why you're following the King to the Holy Land, isn't it?"
"No, Marian, it is not!"
"Do not lie to me, Robin! You've always liked showing off with your bow and protecting the King in the battlefield is the perfect place for that. Everyone will look up to you there - Robin of Locksley who has given up his home and lands to follow his King into battle. When do you leave?"
"We're leaving as soon as I return to Locksley," replied Robin. "Marian, please, I do not want to leave things like this with you."
"Neither do I," I said quietly. "We were going to get married, Robin. What is to become of that?"
"I'm sorry, Marian," replied Robin sadly.
"So am I." I looked down at my hands and saw the ring that Robin had given to me when he asked me to marry him several months ago. I began to slide it off my finger but Robin put his hand over mine and stopped me. I curled my fingers around Robin's hand, feeling the warmth of it enclose me. Slowly, I raised my eyes to meet his again.
"I gave you that ring, Marian, and it is yours. I don't want it back."
"Robin, I-" Robin cut me off.
"I might not return from Acre at all, Marian. So promise me one thing, promise me that you'll forget about me and move on with your life, get married…"
"I can't just forget about you, Robin," I said.
"Marian, you can and you must. It does not do to dwell and forget to live."
"I-" I stopped and looked at Robin, his eyes searched mine and as I looked into his soul and he into mine, I could see him begging me to agree to this for him. "I promise I'll try, Robin, nothing more," I said, fighting back tears.
"Thank you," whispered Robin, before he leaned in and kissed me. It was sweet and full of a longing desperation, it was a goodbye kiss. We parted and Robin stepped backward into the light pouring in from the main doors of the castle. "Goodbye, my love," he said, before he turned around and went down the steps to his horse.
Slowly, I walked to the door and looked at him as he rode under the portcullis and out into the town beyond. "Goodbye, Robin," I whispered.
I fled to my room where I finally succumbed to my tears. I cried until I could cry no more. I cried for Robin and I cried for the life and the love that we could have had. Once I had finished crying I wiped my eyes and then took off my ring. Opening the lid of a small box, I tenderly placed the ring inside and closed the lid with a sharp click of finality. Robin was gone and I did not know when I would see him again or even iif/i I would see him again - that chapter of my life was closed now.
There was a knock on my door and I jumped slightly at the intrusion of sound into my sadness. "Who is it?" I asked.
"It's me," came the voice of my father.
"Come in," I replied.
The door opened and my father entered; my wonderful, sweet, honourable father. "One of the guards said that Robin was here," he said. "Where is he?"
"Robin has gone," I replied firmly.
"When will he be back?" questioned my father.
"I do not know if he will be back at all." My father looked confused at this so I explained to him. "He's going with the King," I said simply.
"To the Holy Land?" he asked incredously.
I nodded in reply.
"And what of your marriage?"
"There is no marriage, just as there is no Robin," I stated.
"I'm sorry, Marian," said my father.
I stepped past him and went to the door. "I'm going for a ride, I'll be back later." With that I walked out of the room, leaving my father standing there. I was still trying to get my head around the fact that Robin was going to the Holy Land and I was no longer betrothed, although deep down inside me, in my heart, my heart still belonged to Robin, I just didn't realise it.
