"Are you actually kidding?" I asked James Potter, bane of my existence. Well, currently. "You want me to 'fake date' you? And you think, what, because you're the cousin of the Prince I'm going to agree?"
"Lily," James slid into a seat opposite me, dark hair ruffled, messy but an appropriate length. "I'm asking you because it would be mutually beneficial. And because I trust you."
Something melted in me. So of course, I snorted. Attractively. I flushed and looked around the library, and tried to ignore the fact that Luelle Dorkins, social media fanatic and gossip blogger had turned around to start typing out of whole story on the daughter of the divine duchess being a disgrace in disgusting ways or something with equally as much awful alliteration. I sneered and turned back to James, who was waiting for me and looking strangely.
"Give me one reason why this would be a good idea?" I raised an eyebrow.
So he took out a list. An honest to God list.
"One - you need a date for the upcoming royal wedding otherwise all the magazines will write about how you're boring and going to end up alone. And how you should dress better. Two - I also -" James was cut off by a hand being held up. My hand.
"Please James, just summarise," I sighed, fighting back the headache that was coming on as the words my sister offers cared to natter at me echoed through my ears.
"Basically we both need dates for the upcoming social season," James wrinkled his nose here and I almost joined him before remembering that I was Not Pleased with him at the moment. "On top of that I need someone to deter the girl who has been convinced we were made for each other since an encounter in a pub. And you need to improve your image."
"My image?" I scoffed, despite the multiple people who lectured me about it on a regular basis.
"Lily," James raised an eyebrow at me condescendingly. "You don't date. This leads to the media thinking you're either asexual and/ or gay. Which doesn't go down well in the presses eyes or the Palace's. You don't dress the way a girl in your position should. You also announced on your Twitter you were converting to Islam-"
"I am!"
" - during the middle of exam week so you've alienated a large majority of the country as well as given the idea you are slightly unstable," James grinned, thinking himself charming no doubt.
I rolled my eyes and stood up, slammed my laptop up shut and stacked my books up. "Fine."
"You know I really do - wait what?" James frowned. "Are you serious?"
"Yeah," I sighed, officially done with the day. "You know what, whatever," I shrugged and lifted my books into my arms, walking out of the university library with James smiling goofily at the table. Walking backwards, I called out to him "Oi Potter, text me yeah?"
I turned back around feeling rather satisfied with myself.
And promptly tripped over.
"So let me get this straight - you agreed to fake date Potter so you had a date/ to get everyone off your back?" Marly blew bubbles in her milkshake. "That's kind of crazy stupid. I like it!"
Lettie snorted. "You would!"
"I'm such an idiot," I groaned and attempted to drown myself in a copious amount of hot chocolate.
"Well, we kind of already knew that," Marl pointed out unhelpfully. "Remember that time you went out in your underwear and you got photographed?"
"Or that time you borrowed McDonalds shoes and you ended up waddling around all day because they were a size too small and someone YouTubed it?" Lettie joined me in the fun.
"Or that time-"
"Alright, I get it," I scowled, breaking a marshmallow in half and popping it in my mouth as Lettie pulled the sleeves of her sweater down.
Unfortunately the other students of the university had decided to also head down from the castle that was the nearby town of Hogsmeade for lunch. And as such, our usual haunt the Three Broomsticks was cramped, and we'd had no choice rather than to head to the Hog's Head, a pub with questionable reputation. It was damp, gritty, lacked cleanliness and the bartender was either judging my choice in jumper or staring at my boobs. And most importantly, it was freezing.
"Ugh I have a two o'clock class," Lettie screwed her face up and stood up, then slapped some coins onto the table.
"That sucks," I made a face which caused the girl it was directed to to try and mimic it before walking out, waving goodbye before turning around, her brown braid swinging wildly. "What you up to Marls?"
"I have a group project to work on," Marly frowned adding coins to the pile I had already added to. "I'm catching the 6 o'clock train. Or maybe the 5."
"I'm headed out now," I shrugged, waving goodbye to her as we parted ways, Marly heading up to the castle and myself to the train station. I pulled my iPod out and plugged my earphone in. Mentally I was eating a lost of what I needed to do between now and my exam on Thursday, when Sirius Black swung an arm over my shoulder.
"'Lo Black," I looked up at him. "How are you?"
"I'm fine, although I have a feeling you're better," Sirius smirked. "Hear you're dating my boy Jimmy."
"Did you smirk Black?" I raised a brow. " I thought people only did that in books. 'Sides we're only fake dating."
Sirius then shoved his hand over my mouth. "Shh! The paparazzi are everywhere."
I licked his hand. And promptly recoiled in shock. "God Black, do you bathe in Axe or something?"
"It's my natural musk," Sirius drew back as well, frowning and frantically wiped his hand on his jeans. "Besides, you would have never have known if you hadn't licked me."
"I would have never done that if you hadn't put your hand over my mouth!" I retorted as the train pulled up. Black and I boarded the train with a couple of other students slashing our travel cards. "You know if I was in the mood I would lecture you on the censorship of women and it being a disgustingly long 'tradition'. But I'm not in the mood. So how was your day?"
Black and I seated ourselves a couple of seats between an old lady who was knitting furiously and three teenage girls giggling.
"That sounds an awful lot like one of Marlene's half finished articles. But I'm not up to much. Going to my cousins for dinner. Drinks afterwards."
"Saturday night so you're going to get plastered?" I raised a brow. "That's kind of classic Sirius."
"Going out to my cousins? Is that also classic Sirius?" He raised a brow right back at me.
"Not quite," I grinned in response.
"So what are you up to?" Sirius asked as we entered the city.
"I'm headed to my house to get a move on with my work," I shrugged.
"Fun," Sirius replied.
We sat in silence for while, before my stop came up and I smiled goodbye to him, flashing my transit card once I got off, and starting the long walk back to my house.
Don't think I'm weird or anything, but I enjoyed the walk home. Sure, the two kilometres were kind of pushing it, I generally ended up with blisters and I did have to run during the rainy season more often than not, but generally I didn't get a lot of exercise. That was what the walk forced me too. Also, learn how to speed dial. There were some shifty people around my house, and as such I had been forced to set up a speed dial for numerous people, including but not limited to; Mary, my mother, Marlene, Lettie, the shopkeeper across the road, the head of my mothers security, the police, the builders down the road. Honestly, I should have just moved, but I didn't have the money, as I did not have a job, and thus relied on a small amount of money from my parents and what I had earned in high school. So unless I wanted to beg my parents for money, I would not end up moving. And no way in hell was I moving back home with my conniving and manipulative sister.
With a screwed up face I entered my home, a small apartment which I shared with my roommate Mary. "Hello Mary!" I called out to her.
"You need to call your mother," she glared at me as I entered the room before returning to talk one of her many friends in Cantonese, who was sitting on the couch opposite my roommate, looking me up and down.
I stalked up the hallway and threw my bag onto my bed, and eyed the unmade covers. While I really wanted to get back under them, I was in my clothes from school, and I'd been sitting on public transport in them …
I pulled off my jumper and jeans, and snuggled underneath the covers.
A shower wasn't really necessary.
"LILY!" I jumped at the sound of Marlene's voice and held the phone away from my ear. "We're going ouuuuuutttt!"
"Marlene, it's a Thursday," I sighed, pressing two fingers to my temple. "You have an exam tomorrow."
"Lil-yyyyyyy," Marlene responded. "You have to come tonight! You only have one class tomorrow! Anyway, youknow my dad is paying my way through university, and he's bribing me in shoes. I don't care."
I considered my options. On one hand, I have a pile of homework to get through, I need to call my mother, and Iwould like to get some sleep tonight. On the other hand, I haveone class tomorrow, Mary was hardly going to talk to me all night, and I didn't want to be alone.
"Lily, if you don't come, I'm going to come over to your house and scale your wall and come in through you window."
For a moment she sounded sober and I sighed, remembering what had happened last time. "Fine, where are you?"
"At the Leaky Cauldron!" Marlene squealed back. "You're the best Lily - invite your hot roommate!"
She hung up, and I was left with a beeping phone as I stared remorsefully at my wardrobe. I'd never been much of a shopper, and the few things I liked and found were either a) too expensive or b) didn't fit. As such, I ended up in a pair of jeans, an old sweater that hung loosely and boots. As a last minute thought, I threw on some lipstick and let my hair out.
"Mary!" I called out as I picked up my bag, sliding my phone in and picking out my headphones, heading downstairs and untangling them. "I'm going out with my friends, if you want you can come out with me?"
Mary stared at me from the living room, her friend mimicking her action, and I sighed, heading out of the apartment, locking the door behind me.
The part of the city where I lived really lit up at night. You got the drunks, people on every doorstep, people getting high, bottles being smashed, yelling from the couple across the road in Latin as she once more threw all of his belongings out the window and onto the street. Just generally lovely.
Screwing my face up I boarded the next train, having looked up the transport to the pub, and plugged my headphones in. The train road was soothing, and the transit officer only came into the carriage once, escorting away a delightful youth who had been snorting a line off the arm of a seat. I exited the train, and walked past the pair of women on the corner of the street who were grinning at passing businessmen and the sort, giving them a nod, and walked into the pub that Marlene had chosen for the night.
Like the rest of Marly's haunts, it was filled with vintage posters, dart boards, 80's music and bad beer. She claimed that all the potential sugar daddies and highly intellectual girls hung out in these sorts of places, and she preferred her hook ups to be of that sort of crowd. I just thought she liked the beer and throwing darts.
"Lily! You made it!" Marlene threw her arms around my neck and I pulled back, only choking slightly.
"Yeah!" I wheezed as she pulled off me. "Made it."
"You didn't bring your cute friend?" Marly pouted, before bounding back over to the table, pulling my arm.
As my eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, I realised that crowded around the table was a large crowd of kids from my university. Alice and Frank were making out on one of the seats, the chair rocking severely. Tilly, Maya and Alyssa were giggling excitedly as Aneesa recounted a story excitedly. And then, Marly flung her arms around both Remus and Peter. And where they were, James and Sirius were bound to be also. Sure enough, I was pulled into Sirius's lap within secounds.
"He - I thought you were Marly!" Sirius slurred his words sightly, and I rolled my eyes even as a small smile made its way to my face.
"Nah, she's legless over there," I jerked my head towards behind me, where Marly had decided to sprawl across the table, pressing her face against 'the cool' of the fake wood. I pulled myself off Sirius and returned to him his own space. "Thought I said goodbye to you a couple of hours ago?"
"Then I got this text," Sirius showed me his phone.
'DRINKS AT THE LEAKY CAULDRAN BICCHESSSSSS BETTER C U THERE OR ILL BE MADDDDDD'
"How much had she had to drink at this time?" I frowned.
"Well, she was giggling by the time I arrived."
I was seated at the bar, sipping on my drink when James slid into the seat next to me.
"You know if you really wanted to make an impression I'd be more than willing to snog you," James grinned widely.
I let a small smile rest on my face and looked up at him from my glass. "I think I'm alright. 'Sides who would take photos?"
"We could get Marly to do it," James jerked his head backwards to the girl in question who was twirling on a table, holding a shot glass in both hands.
I snorted. "I don't think that you'll be able to get the glasses out of her hands."
"That may be true," James' eyes were sparkling in a way that ones tended to do after a glass or two and a smile was resting on his face like that was where it belonged. "You drinking?"
"No," I shook my head. "Muslims don't drink."
"Right," James drawled. "Of course."
"You don't believe me," I turned to him, pouting.
"Maybe."
I glared at him. "Alright, have some of it then."
"Don't mind if I do," James grinned and picked up my glass, downing the rest of it. "Thanks Evans."
I glared as he walked away, and stood up, intent on giving him a piece of my mind, when Marly collapsed onto the floor in a fit of giggles. Sighing, I walked over to Marly.
"Come on, up you get," I said, pulling the girl up off the floor even as the 5'11'' body slumped against me.
"You getting her a taxi?" Maya asked, her and Aneesa leaning heavily on one another.
"Yeah," I smiled, hoping it didn't look like a grimace as Marly lunged forward and clawed at my neck.
"We'll come with you," Aneesa giggled.
We made our way out of the pub and onto the streets of the city, Marly pawing at my hair. "
"Your hair is so pretty Lily!" She giggled. "Like fire!"
"Yes," I winced as she pulled tightly on a lock.
"Or a carrot!"
Thanks Marls.
I paced down the street and was delighted when I managed to hail a taxi. Trying to get Marly into the taxi was another problem however.
"I love tonight!" She threw her head back as I pushed her in and Maya pulled her. "I'm going to name my children after tonight!"
"What, Thursday?" I puffed.
"No," she frowned. "Tonight. Duh."
I sighed and shoved her into the taxi, waved goodbye to the slightly sober Aneesa and Maya and made my way to the train station, waiting for the 2.30.
And that was when I got the text.
I guess I owe you a drink evans
mine 630 tomorrow
Despite myself, I smiled. I guess I had a date.
Shoutout to the people who had to put up with me on my tumblr thinking I was hilarious while I was writing this. What do you think of Lily? She's a really hard character to nail. Anyway, do let me know what you think.
Much love,
Louisa Xx
