A Heart of Steel

Summary: Nadia knew from personal experience how it felt to be unwanted. She was that unclaimed kid that no one ever wanted, the kid that blended into the background so well until no one knew her at all. After that, Nadia made a vow that she wouldn't allow anyone else to feel like that. She gives up her dark past and settles in to live with Gwen, a friend from college. However, it seems she can't escape it when they run into Torchwood.

Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood, Doctor Who, or anything mentioned in this fanfic. That is, all except my OC, Nadia. For a quick physical description, you can picture her looking similar to the actress, Annie Murphy but with soft blonde hair. I hope she doesn't seem like a total Mary-Sue to any of you readers but its okay if she does. Constructive criticism is accepted, along with any suggestions that you have for this story. Help is always welcomed. Anyway, let's get this story started. Without further ado, my newest story, A Heart of Steel!

Prologue:

Hello, hello, anybody out there?

Cause I don't hear a sound

Alone, alone

I don't really know where the world is but I miss it now

I'm out on the edge and I'm screaming my name

Like a fool at the top of my lungs

Sometimes when I close my eyes I pretend I'm alright

But it's never enough

''Echo'' by Jason Walker

''I'm coming, I'm coming,'' Gwen Cooper huffed irritably, hearing the second knock on her door as she stormed down the hallway, grabbing the door knob and pulling it open. ''Stupid, nosey neighbors…'' she trailed off, stunned, as she took in the sight before her with shock and confusion.

An unfamiliar slender, small woman stood before her. She wore a torn black dress and stood barefoot, a pair of broken black heels in one hand. Dark, fiery red locks fell around her head, matted down, tangled, messy, and soaking wet from the rain. Her face was blank but her eyes, oh her eyes. They were filled with so much guilt and horror, as if she had just lived through something terrifying. To her surprise, Gwen recognized those sapphire colored eyes. They were the same eyes she had seen years ago, lighting up whenever she laughed in her college days.

''Nadia? ,'' the name slipped through Gwen's lips in a gasp as Nadia raised her sapphire irises to meet Gwen's own surprised, dark grey eyes. Abruptly, tears started filling her eyes and Gwen didn't even have to think about her next course of action. Quickly, she reached out and pulled the woman into her arms, closing the door behind her. The young woman collapsed into her arms, sobbing into her shoulder as she dropped the broken heels in her hand, wrapping her arms around Gwen in return, clutching at her as she shook with the force of her silent sobs.

Moving over to her room, Gwen gently detached herself from Nadia, telling her to wait for a moment. She was glad Rhys wasn't here. He was out with his mates and wouldn't be back until the next morning. Rummaging through her closet, Gwen pulled out a pair of comfortable baggy grey sweatpants and an old faded dark blue sweatshirt along with a pair of her underwear and one of her bras. Moving back to where Nadia was still standing, she ushered the younger woman into the bathroom, helping her strip out of the torn black dress and undergarments. She turned the hot water on in the bath and started running it, helping Nadia into the tub. The tub was large enough for Gwen herself to stretch out in and it made Nadia seem at least ten times smaller as she stretched out, her feet resting about halfway down the tub.

Gwen didn't feel uncomfortable doing this at all. She reflected over it as she settled a clean towel down at the side of the tub so she could kneel there after setting another two neatly folded towels on the toilet seat. She and Nadia had been so close in their college days. They had been closer than sisters. Gwen considered her a younger sister and Nadia reciprocated the feeling. Gwen's mother and father had practically adopted her into the Cooper family. They were family and closer than anything.

''Turn so I can wash your hair, sweetie,'' Gwen spoke gently and Nadia wordlessly turned her back to Gwen, following her words. Gwen's heart warmed at the reminder of the complete trust Nadia had for her to do that. Nadia had once told her that she didn't like turning her back to anything because she was afraid it would come back to bite her. However, she had complete trust in Gwen and leaned back into her hands as Gwen used a bucket to wet her hair before starting to wash it. Throughout the whole process, she kept speaking softly to the younger woman as her hands gently but thoroughly scrubbed through her limp red scalp.

When she was finished, the previously clean tub water was a mixture of watery red and brown from her hair. The red was a result of the dye coming out of her hair. The color had faded somewhat but it was still a light red. Gwen helped her out of the tub before wrapping her in a warm fluffy towel, leaning over to drain the water out of the tub before returning to Nadia. They moved into the bedroom, Gwen leading Nadia with a gentle arm around her thin shoulders. A worried frown crossed her face as she noticed the thinness of the younger woman's shoulders.

Nadia sat down on the bed and Gwen curled up behind her, starting to gently brush through her long, red locks. The more she brushed, the more Nadia's hair started to shine. When Gwen finally set down the hairbrush, her hair fell down to her mid-back in copper red waves. Nadia turned to face her, her dull sapphire irises meeting Gwen's worried dark grey orbs. Gwen remembered countless times where Nadia's eyes had been so bright and her smile had held a certain mischief to it, as if she was constantly privy to a secret no one knew about. Now those bright eyes were dull, as if someone had taken the life right out of them, and her smile was gone, replaced by a constant blank look.

It was as if everything that had made her Nadia had been ripped away, leaving behind a mere shadow of the constantly laughing, bright-eyed, grinning, kind, and mischievous person Gwen had met and bonded so deeply with in college. Lifting her arms, Gwen looked at Nadia expectantly, a soft smile on her face as the younger woman instantly crawled into her arms, crying into her shoulder as she trembled in Gwen's arms. Shushing her gently, Gwen started gently rocking them back and forth, humming a soft lullaby into her ears as she cried silently.

LINE LINE LINE

The next morning, Gwen woke to find herself lying in her giant bed, still dressed in her pajamas. She looked down to see a head of copper red locks buried in her shoulder Nadia shivered in her sleep, curling into a tighter ball and snuggling closer to her. Gwen's pale hand gently swept through the soft red locks before she gently shook her shoulder. Nadia's eyes opened and she sat up, looking at Gwen as she sat up as well.

''Come on, sweetie, let's get you something to eat and drink,'' she smiled softly at the younger woman, standing and moving towards the kitchen. Glancing over her shoulder, she smiled fondly as she watched Nadia tumble out of bed before following behind her to the kitchen. Gwen moved behind the counter, starting to make some breakfast for the two while Nadia sat down on one of the stools at the counter, watching Gwen with her eyes.

''Here you go,'' Gwen smiled as she set down a plate of bacon and cheese eggs in front of Nadia, along with a cup of hot chocolate with dark gold sprinkles. Nadia eyed them for a moment before starting to slowly eat the food while taking slow sips of the hot chocolate. Gwen smiled fondly as she sipped at her hot tea. In college, Nadia had confessed that her favorite drink in the world was a cup of nice steaming hot chocolate with golden sprinkles inside. Gwen had made it this morning in hopes of bringing some of the old Nadia back. All it managed to do was make Nadia's lips twitch slightly in the smallest smile as she sipped at the drink. However, Gwen counted that as a small victory on her part.

''Eat up, you're as thin as a twig,'' Gwen pointed at her jokingly and Nadia's lips curled slightly as she continued drinking her hot chocolate, nodding in response to Gwen's words.

''I'm back! Gwen, I'm back!'' Rhys' voice rang through the house as they heard the door open before slamming shut. Rhys appeared in the doorway to the living room, pausing as he took in the scene before him, looking at Nadia with a puzzled look. ''Who's this, Gwen?''

Gwen sighed, setting down her tea to rub her forehead. Her lips twitched into an amused smile as Nadia turned back to her, raising an eyebrow in question, as if asking, 'Yeah Gwen, who is that?' Gwen smiled as she winked at Nadia before turning to Rhys. ''Rhys, this is Nadia, my friend from college. Remember I told you about her? Nadia, this is Rhys, my boyfriend.''

''Yeah, I remember,'' Rhys answered, eyeing Nadia as he moved forward, holding out a hand to her. His confused look melted away, replaced by a warm smile. ''Hey, I'm Rhys. It's nice to meet you, Nadia.''

Nadia's sapphire irises narrowed as she eyed his hand for a moment. Gwen held her breath, hoping that she would approve. Rhys merely watched her, confusion slowly settling in again. A tense, uncomfortable silence started to form before breaking as Nadia reached out and shook his hand. Her small hand seemed tiny against his larger hand as she withdrew it, sending him a very small smile, still silent. Turning away from him, she looked at Gwen and gave her a firm nod, signaling that she approved. Gwen's worry disappeared as she grinned widely, looking to Rhys.

''She's happy to meet you too, Rhys,'' she translated, glancing at Nadia, who sipped at her hot chocolate. ''She doesn't really talk.''

''What did the nod mean? ,'' Rhys asked, his confusion gone and replaced by curiosity as he took the stool seat beside Nadia.

''Oh, she approved of you. That's all,'' Gwen grinned, snickering as Rhys' face lit up with a smile.

''Thank you,'' he told Nadia, grinning at her as she smiled back, a very small smile, continuing to sip at her drink. ''So, is this just a visit?''

''Actually,'' Gwen started, glancing at Rhys with a hopeful look. ''Nadia needs a place to stay. Can she stay here Rhys?'' Ignoring them, Nadia glanced down at her mug, a frown crossing her face as she noticed all of the golden sprinkles had melted inside the steaming liquid. Shrugging, she continued drinking it, unminding.

''Absolutely! She can stay as long as she wants,'' Rhys nodded firmly and Nadia finally registered their conversation. Her eyes widened as she choked on her hot chocolate, staring at both Gwen and Rhys with wide sapphire colored irises. Lifting a hand, she pointed at herself, glancing between them. Gwen grinned as she nodded and her eyes turned to Rhys, unsure. He grinned back at her, nodding in affirmative.

Blinking rapidly, Nadia tilted her head before feeling her lips curl up into a slightly wider smile than any of the small smiles she had shown all that morning. She stood from her seat before shuffling over to Gwen, hugging her tightly. Gwen returned the hug before grinning wider as Nadia pulled back and moved over to Rhys, wrapping her arms around his neck to hug him as well. He blinked, surprised at the unexpected hug, before smiling as he returned the hug, patting her back.

LINE LINE LINE

''Come on, let's get shopping,'' Gwen smiled as she rushed into the first store in the mall. Nadia was right beside her, being pulled by the hand. Rhys was on Gwen's other side, smiling as they walked inside the store together.

Soon, Rhys and Gwen were seated outside a dressing room, waiting patiently. Nadia was inside the dressing room, changing into the first outfit out of the large pile Gwen and Rhys had picked out for her.

''Oh that looks good,'' Gwen nodded vehemently, her eyes lighting up as she smiled. Nadia glanced down at herself as she stood before them, tilting her head as she examined the outfit. A pair of faded blue jeans hugged her long, bony legs, followed by an off the shoulder simple plain black sweater over a grey tank top and a set of black heels. Eyeing the heels for a moment, Nadia slipped them off and left towards the shoe department for a moment. She came back a minute later wearing a pair of black combat boots like Gwen's.

''Nice,'' Gwen laughed in approval, nodding and sending her a thumbs up. Rhys nodded with her, smiling. Nodding, Nadia spun around and marched back into the dressing room to change into the next outfit. A few minutes later, Nadia came out in an outfit that both Gwen and Rhys instantly approved of. She wore a pair of black pants, a dark sapphire blue short-sleeve shirt that matched her eyes, black converses, and a wool pea coat. It had long sleeves and a hood in the back. It was long, swishing around her knees. It was an odd and old design but strangely enough, it fit her. It just fit Nadia completely.

''Hello Miss Holmes,'' Gwen grinned and saluted playfully, watching as Nadia's eyes softened as her lips twitched into a small, pleased smile. Gwen easily remembered Nadia's obsession with Sherlock Holmes. It seemed that obsession had not faded over the time they'd been apart. To prove it, Nadia did a brief spin on the platform before them, her smile widening a little as she giggled quietly. Gwen and Rhys looked at each as they heard the quiet sound, smiling victoriously. That was the first sound they had gotten out of her since she had choked on her hot chocolate that morning in surprise at their decision to let her stay with them.

LINE LINE LINE

''You liked Sherlock Holmes? ,'' Rhys laughed, placing another chip in his mouth as he looked across the table at Nadia, who smiled as she nodded silently.

''She still does,'' Gwen snickered, sitting beside him and across from Nadia. ''She was obsessed with him in our Uni days.''

''Can't say I blame her,'' Rhys smiled, talking through a mouth full of fish. ''Sherlock Holmes was a brilliant man.''

Nodding vehemently, Nadia looked at Gwen with a triumphant look that said 'Ha, see? Someone else likes him too'.

''What? Like Superman? ,'' Gwen joked, smiling an amused smile at the look Nadia had shot her. It seemed some of the old Nadia was slowly coming back.

''Superman wasn't as brilliant as Sherlock Holmes,'' Rhys argued, glancing at Nadia to see her nodding along, completely agreeing with his statement.

''No,'' Gwen argued back, brandishing a chip at Rhys as if was a sword. ''Superman was better. He was indestructible, for God's sake!''

''Yeah but Sherlock Holmes was completely brilliant at deductions,'' Rhys defended. ''He was way smarter than Superman could ever be.''

''His own cape never got any stains,'' Gwen argued, satisfied.

''Sherlock Holmes' coat never got any stains either,'' Rhys pointed out. ''It was practically indestructible, you know.''

Gwen opened her mouth to argue but frowned, closing her mouth a second later. She sat back and crossed her arms over her chest with a huff as she realized there was nothing she could say. Rhys laughed and Nadia started giggling, her eyes lightening slightly.

LINE LINE LINE

''Which one would you like? ,'' Gwen asked with a smile, gesturing to the cages around them. They stood in one of the animal shelters, waiting for Nadia. It had been Rhys' idea after remembering what Gwen had told him about her over the years after their Uni days. Apparently, Nadia had always loved anything that moved, especially animals. It seemed she still did, judging by the look on her face as she spun slowly, taking in all the animals around her.

''Go on, pick one,'' Rhys encouraged her, smiling as he stood in the first aisle, closest to the entrance, holding Gwen's hand as she stood beside him. Glancing over at him, Nadia nodded and closed her eyes, a concentrated look crossing her face. Slowly, she moved down the aisle, her head turning slightly this way and that. The entire time, her eyes remained closed. Gwen and Rhys watched her from the entrance, waiting patiently.

She kept slowly walking down the aisle until she stopped abruptly at the last cage. Her eyes opened as she turned to face the cage to her left, sapphire blue irises blinking in mild surprise. Stepping closer to the metal cage, she studied the animal she had chosen. It was a cat. It looked starved to death, judging by the bones she could see practically jutting out of its side. Its fur was messy, tangled, and shorn, as if someone had taken a razor to it. The cat lifted its head and tired, bright crystal blue eyes met her own sapphire irises.

There was a tiredness in its eyes, a complete exhaustion. Emotions flitted through its eyes, some too fast for Nadia to pick up. However, she could see quite a few. There was sorrow, distrust, and a very faint hope in its eyes. Slowly, Nadia reached inside, pausing as she saw his ears fly back to press flat against his head as he hissed lowly. His bright, crystal blue eyes were scared, terrified and distrustful.

Her eyes softened as she lay her hand, palm out, before him, allowing him to come to her. He eyed her suspiciously, creeping forward to sniff her hand a few times. When he was finished, he lowered his head slightly and she took that as a sign. She reached forward and gently ran her fingers through his matted fur, smiling a small smile as he let out a quiet purr at the gentle touch. He relaxed slightly, leaning forward and pushing his head up into her hand.